swordandscytheandpen

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saying insane shit to my wife right before bed like "I think that the only reason humans consider death to be absolute is because technology hasn't made 'resurrection' possible yet, but humans also used to think things like breaking a leg or losing your teeth were absolute. it's a scientific problem like any other."

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My favorite sci-fi thing I've ever thought of is something I'd like to call Humans Are Space Ants. Basically, humans enter the larger universe and find that all other intelligent life are practically gods. The thing is, though, humanity's exploitation of physics has gotten so out of hand that they are on equal footing.

Important to remember, the aliens are far, far beyond us. Their understanding of the universe is much deeper, their power is far greater, but we just fuck around with existence harder than any other being has the lack of sense to. And it has had extremely potent results.

Although humanity's standing up to a civilization of a billion literal Cthulus, they're winning. They will eventually codify eldritch knowledge in a way they can understand.

Imagine if ants developed music partly on accident by just doing math about it. You would be so confused as to how they even did that. But they did. And then the next time you go out into your yard you hear the objective single best piece of music you have ever heard, and it's about the ants asking you to stop poisoning their nests before they teleport into your brain and kill you. And they figured out how to teleport using the music. Somehow. Even ignoring the fact they can teleport with music, how could they have composed the greatest song to ever be? they don't even fullly get it!

Basically, eldritch gods watching humanity's bullshit with confounded outrage. I should probably write about this at some point, it seems pretty damn funny/cool

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Witchy kitty

Minecraft witch but it’s the witch’s cat >:3 

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Attorney General nominee Matt Gaetz sent young women thousands of dollars on Venmo for the reasons of “Reimbursement,” “Being my friend,” “🤗,” “xtra 4 u,” and “Just because”

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me when i recommend something to someone and they end up not liking it

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y'know the idea of personifying a country brings with it a mountain of complicated historical and ethnic baggage, brings into sharp relief the construction of national mythologies as viewed from without and within, raises questions as to what degree a nation can be considered a single entity--hetalia deftly avoids coming under this sort of scrutiny by eclipsing it all with a premise that ensures that the only reasonable response to being told it is simply "IT'S ABOUT FUCKING WHO????"

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not naming names but i hate this character design trope

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usually the argument behind tarrifs is that it'll make domestic production more competitive but since there is no domestic production the position is pretty much just 'fuck foreigners, lets make everything more expensive' which is very funny

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me with my quilava

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you idiots need to stop saying versions of "only white people hate a pseudoscience that categorises people based on the position of the stars" how are you unironically assigning whiteness to critiques of astrology. was it whiteness when activist narendra dabholkar opposed superstition to the extent that it got him fucking murdered? do you think he opposed astrology because he was just one of those westernised guys? you think only white people oppose biological determinism? fuck off with the benevolent racism

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Alexandra

Experimental painting commission for anonymous

Patreon | Ko-Fi | Carrd

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How long until Dr Oz becomes Surgeon General

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Apparently the 1300 ft trash chute in 432 Park Avenue does not have any breaks or offsets in it to slow down the garbage so stuff thrown away at the top floors easily reaches terminal velocity and sounds like bombs going off when it hits the bottom.

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rose and blake roleswap?