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Waltz of Ruin
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what a clingy little loser i am lol
#we spend hours on a date and i tear up when she leaves#i have work and i know its important. but i already miss him so much#i dont want to go to sleep alone
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i need to fucking move to a new country and never talk to anyone again. im so embarrassed dude. had a dream abt sharks last night and i wish i had been fed to them. ick
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i need them so bad i need them so BADDDDDDDDD FUUUUUUUUUCK
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ive made myselffeel ill w thinking
#fu k#i feel so very laone but dont wanna force anyoen to talk to me#hoped finn would say smth but she didnf#ik i cant expect much froma hi. but i still hopd
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started thinking abt potentially getting to meet karka soon and now i cant stop thinking abt it. i think in a beautiful world i would be able to drive already and i would be getting practice, but i will set an alarm for tomorrow so i can talk to dad and get some driving in. bc i wanna have my license soon, ill practice over the summer, then hopefully be able to drive to illinois over the school year
#theres also a world where i could maybe potentially one day fly to meet finn#or pick them up from the airport#i. wanna meet up so bad lmao#like its smth im a little stressed about since i have exactly zero experience w Anyone#byt i wanna wrap my arms around my partner
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worst part abt this job is i literally have no time to even chat w my friends anymore. im busy until 4:30 at the earliest, then i come home exhausted and pass out. now its almost 9:30 and ive hardly contributed to conversation and i miss my friends
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i know i will feel worse if i leave. i wont wanna be alone w my thoughts and i hate feeling left out so like i have to stay but fuck i hope we are done soon lmao
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i know i will feel worse if i leave. i wont wanna be alone w my thoughts and i hate feeling left out so like i have to stay but fuck i hope we are done soon lmao
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finn noticed i wasnt talking what if i kill myself immediately and intimately
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