sterekangstgoblin

[sterekangstgoblin]

me reading a slowburn:

brain gremlin no.1: KISS. kiss. kiiiiiiiiiiiisssss. KIS.ᴋɪss. ᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢ

brain gremlin no.2: HOOOOOboy doNOT kiss no gotta MAKE EACH OTHER FURIOUS YESSS. fiGHT. touch but ᴀᴄᴄɪᴅᴇɴᴛᴀʟʟʏ. MAINTAIN that EMOTIONAL DISTANCE son!!!! FEAR INTIMACY. FEAR IT

[sterekangstgoblin]

[sterekangstgoblin]

hey i’m looking for a fic that i think was a/b/o and stiles was an infertile omega and he didn’t tell his mate (i don’t remember who, maybe derek or peter) and he was like looking online to find fertile a fertile omega for his mate and he was like wishing that maybe they would let him stick around when they have babies to help and idk thanks

Hey @bitchingtrash! (First of all, I love your new profile pic.) @scented-books found this one! 

Empty by modestfuckup

(1/1 I 3,373 I Teen I Sterek)

Stiles stops listening to the words the doctor is saying, a stream of tears rolling down his face. His training taught him he has to remain calm. He uses a tissue to blot at the tears as his mind already turns to what is going to happen now. The doctor is talking about his options, and treatments he could undergo, but Stiles knows none of that will work.

He’s infertile.

With no way to supply his alpha with an heir, he is practically useless.

Or the one where Stiles is an infertile omega, and society dictates that if an omega is unable to carry on the alpha’s lineage, an alpha is allowed to take another omega. Stiles hides his condition from Derek while he copes and starts the process of finding a new omega for him.

[sterekangstgoblin]

Love the idea of Stiles and Derek not being able to quarantine together. Espeically if like, just as quarantine hit, Stiles and Derek were kind of in the middle of an argument. So like, maybe, Derek had to leave for work again and Stiles was like, “No, they’re saying traveling ins’t good right now! There’s a virus!!” and Derek just kind of “You’re over reacting Stiles, It’s going to be /fine/.” then Stile says “Why don’t you care about public health!?” and Derek is just like “I gotta go to work!” so he goes and Stiles is /pissed/ and then while Derek’s away the world ends because the virus spreads very fast. 

So then Derek has to stay where he is, because they shut down the air port and Stiles is like “i fuckign knew it. I told you so” and Derek is just *sigh* And so Stiles is like, at home with his dad, and Derek is /across the country/ and like they obvs miss each other, but it’s also like “if you didn’t leave in the first place we wouldn’t be in this situation!” “Well how was i supposed to know they’d shut down the country!” “I TOLD YOU THIS WOULD HAPPEN!!” 

So they fight a lot. Every zoom call, every facetime, every text conversation always ends with a fight. It’s not like Derek is /denying/ the virus, he’s just... doesn’t think stiles should be so upset with him. 

When Derek finally gets a flight home, like months later, because ‘murica, Stiles isn’t sure he even wants to see derek, like they had both said some pretty nasty things to one another over the past few months, and Stiles doesn’t even know how he feels about Derek anymore. Derek gets home, and he quaratines himself for two more weeks to make sure that he didn’t catch anything on the plane ride home. As soon as Stiles sees Derek though, all is forgiven, he’s just so happy to have Derek back and home. And derek is so happy to be home because he hated being away from Stiles for so long. 

[sterekangstgoblin]

Reading a fluffy fic by your favorite author:

Said author about to drop the angstiest fic you’ve ever read in your life:

[sterekangstgoblin]

Reading a fluffy fic by your favorite author:

Said author about to drop the angstiest fic you’ve ever read in your life:

[sterekangstgoblin]

Derek looks at the picture on his screen and sort of can’t believe it’s been 5 years since Stiles got out. It feels both like an eternity and the blink of an eye. There on the screen, Derek sees Stiles with a girl, maybe his girlfriend, she’s pretty, Derek wouldn’t blame Stiles for finding someone to love far away from the hellmouth that is Beacon Hills, not that he knew there was someone in Beacon Hills who already loved him, and he looks happy. The hair on his chin is something Derek never would have dreamed, but it looks so good. All he remembered was the clean shaven, baby face from that first day in the woods. And how life, evil, and pain took it away slowly. Now though, now Stiles looks happy. The heavy purple bags under his eyes don’t seem to weight down his smile anymore. Fuck, just yesterday something new rolled into town and Derek would need to take care of it on his own, as per the deal, but Derek’s glad at least Stiles got out. Derek’s glad he got out even though it meant he has to stay, he’s glad Stiles wasn’t forced to remember any of this, though there are parts he wished Stiles could have. His cursor hovers over the ‘Friend Request’ button for the thousandth time. The deal is very clear. Which seems more cruel with each passing day. 

“Please! Please save him!” Stiles lifeless body was on the floor, in his arms. The fight was hard fought, but they still lost. Other bodies scatter the floor too, but Stiles is the one Derek knows he can’t live without. 

“Will do. For a price.”

“Anything. Please!!”

“Your soul for his,” the demon toys with a small light in their hands, twirling it between their fingers.

“Deal,” Derek knew demons were sly and gave you wanted with a twist, but anything, anything, was better than having Stiles’ soul enslaved to this thing. Or at least so he thought.

Derek would like nothing more than to add Stiles as a stranger-friend on facebook. There’s a post-it note on his screen, specifically for moments like these where he wants nothing but to try to connect with Stiles. But the deal is very clear.

Dylan O'Brien with a fan at a party last week in New York. (October 2019) 

UPDATE: Dylan O'Brien and Miyen Rose Chang at a party after the Ben Platt Concert in New York City (September 29th, 2019).

[sterekangstgoblin]

Oh first off OW. Second, imagine sterek.Stiles gets turned against his will, after being hmmmm let's say *spins wheel* having his guts ripped out by a *throws dart* dragon and he and derek are together, so derek bites him and saves him despite them having discussed this before and Stiles ADAMANTLY saying to just let him die.  

SO since Stiles was healed and pretty much brought back to life, his werewolf self is basically supernaturally engineered to heal him, not only fixing the damage done by the dragon, but going back and fixing all the little things that happened when he was still human. Stiles heals faster than all the other wolves. If he gets shot the entry wound is healed before the built exits the other side. Not even Derek, a born wolf, heals as fast as he does. 

So naturally Stiles is unhappy because he never wanted this in the first place. Of course derek says he did it out of love but Stiles also thinks it's incredibly selfish. So maybe they don’t stay together. Everytime Stiles sees Derek, it reminds him of having that choice made for him. 

Stiles gets more and more reckless because he finds that he misses the sensation of pain. MAYBE he even shoots himself with a wolvesbane bullet, just to feel the pain again and his fucking healing heals that shit too he the first werewolf to heal from a wolvesbane bullet without the antidote.And stiles basically becomes immortal, his healing won't let him age past 23 and it sucks. Derek manages to slow his own aging down, because regardless of how Stiles feels about him, he still loves Stiles, but it's not enough to keep up with Stiles. He and Derek fuck every once and a while, because as Stiles ages, Derek becomes the only other constant face in his life.The familiarity of another youthful face. Also ya know /sterek/.

Stiles becomes alpha of the Hale pack, and soon all his friends are gone and he's the alpha to all his nieces and nephews who have kids of their own. Four generations later, Stiles is still the alpha, but he barely lives. He has knocked on death’s door so many times in so many different ways but his healing just won't allow him enough time to slip into the veil. 

Beacon Hills is a safe place. No one is willing to fight an alpha who is literally 500 years old and has seen the world change from hiding supernatural beings to welcoming them out of the shadows. This leaves Stiles bored and after years of fighting his anxiety and PTSD aren’t any better, turns out his healing won’t heal his mental illness. He goes to see his friend’s graves, their kid’s, their kid’s kid’s. Every night Stiles thinks about the day Derek bit him. He thinks about the pain he was in, the feeling of floating, of flying, of death, it's his fondest memory. Being dead for 2 minutes, seeing his mom. Then the gut wrenching feeling of being pulled down by something tied around his ankle and his first gasp of breath with his lungs back in place. He hated Derek in that moment. He still does as every year, ever decade, and every century pass by.

can we take a moment to just think about how incredibly scary magical healing is in-context?

You get your insides ripped open but your friend waves his hands and your flesh just pulls back together, agony and evisceration pulling back to a ‘kinda hurts’ level of pain and you’re physically whole, with the 100% expectation that you’ll get back up and keep fighting whatever it was that struck you down the first time.

You break your arm after falling somewhere and after you’re healed instead of looking for ‘another way around’ everybody just looks at you and goes “okay try again”.

You’ve been fighting for hours, you’re hungry, thirsty, bleeding, crying from exhaustion, and a hand-wave happens and only two of those things go away. you’re still hungry, you’re still weak from thirst, but the handwave means you have ‘no excuse’ to stop.

You act out aggressively maybe punch a wall or gnash your teeth or hit your head on something and it’s hand-waved because it’s ‘such a small injury you probably can’t even feel it anymore’ but the point was that you felt it at all?

Your pain literally means nothing because as long as you’re not bleeding you’re not injured, right? Here drink this potion and who cares about the emotional exhaustion of that butchered village, why are you so reserved in camp don’t you think it’s fun retelling that time you fell through a burning building and with a hand-wave you got back up again and ran out with those two kids and their dog? 

Older warriors who get a shiver around magic-users not because of the whole ‘fireball’ thing but the ‘I don’t know what a normal pain tolerance is anymore’ effect of too much healing. Permanent paralysis and loss of sensation in limbs is pretty much a given in the later years of any fighter’s life. Did I have a stroke or did the mage just heal too hard and now this side of my face doesn’t work? No i’m not dead from the dragon’s claws but I can’t even bend my torso anymore because of how the scar tissue grew out of me like a vine.

Magical healing is great and keeps casualties down.

But man.

That stuff is scary.

[sterekangstgoblin]

Dr. Derek Hale is new to Beacon Hills Pediatrics Hospital. He’s an oncologist. He kind of fell into it while he was in med school. He’s finally out of his residency and returns home to Beacon Hills. This is where he meets Heather Stilinski, an 8 year old with leukemia.  She’s a ball of fucking sunshine, even with the tube in her noes and a shaved head under her beanies.

Her dad isn’t bad either. He saunters into the ward wearing that ungodly fitted Sheriff’s uniform, head shaved to match his daughter which makes him look way younger than he really is. He’s just as lively as Heather, and they laugh and play in the room that is decorated very sweetly with paper flowers and fairy lights. Dr. Derek can’t help but admire the sheriff and his daughter, but Heather is getting sicker and has stopped responding to treatment.

And Derek is tasked with telling him. One day, while Heather is sleeping, and the Sheriff tells Dr. Derek that Heather’s mom walked out the day Heather was diagnosed when she was 3, Stiles lost his mom 20 years ago, and his dad is in the early stages of dementia. His job is overwhelming and all he has is his kid, if Derek has bad news, he doesn’t want to hear it.

So Derek doesn’t, instead he suggests taking Heather home. He gives Stiles his personal phone number and a series of prescriptions to lessen her pain. Derek doesn’t say as much, but Stiles knows, Heather has been weaker for weeks, and has admitted to him quietly that she knows.

Heather and Stiles go home. Stiles takes a sabbatical from work, John is happy to have his granddaughter home. The toll of taking care of Heather and John becomes too much one night and he calls Derek over for help. Derek comes immediately, and helps take care of Heather while Stiles talks to his dad after a painful bought memory loss. Stiles puts his dad and Heather to bed, and just as Derek is getting ready to leave, Stiles invites him to stay for a beer.

Derek does. Queue a very, very hasty fuck.

Then suddenly, Derek is around all the time. Much to Heather’s delight, John’s confusion, and Stiles’ annoyance. Derek really does mean well, but as Heather starts to get worse, and John just doesn’t get it. Stiles finds Derek’s presence intrusive and very disruptive to his idea of spending the last few weeks of his daughter's life with his daughter. John needs more and more of his attention and Stiles gets very jealous that Heather wants to spend more and more time with Derek.

One night, when Stiles and Derek are left after John and Heather are put to bed, and Stiles blows the fuck up at Derek because he’s so full of guilt and anger and frustration and grief. He hasn’t had a time or a moment to really think process so he yells and screams at Derek. Stiles turns red in the face while telling Derek that he’s trying to steal his kid, and that it was just a quick fuck and Derek doesn’t mean shit to him, that he has so many other things going on in his life and Derek’s an idiot for thinking that Stiles could find time for him. LIIKE poor fucking Derek just stands there and takes it. Derek just backs off. He walks out of the house and says he won’t come back.

Immediately, Stiles feels bad. He knows he was just letting out a bunch of pent up anger and emotions. He goes and curls up in Heather’s bed, stroking her buzzed head, and tearing up because he suddenly realizes that Derek was a huge joy in his life when there seemed to be nothing good happening.

Then the next morning Heather asks where Derek is, and Stiles tells her he messed up and that he’s probably not coming back. Heather is really bummed. She also isn’t looking good and within a week she’s deteriorating and Stiles takes her back to the hospital. So naturally he runs into Derek, and apologizes, and admits that he’s going through a lot.

Sties gets Melissa to watch his dad, as he once again sets up home in the chair in Heather’s room.

Heather dies on a Tuesday. Stiles wakes up to someone -Derek- rushing into the room. It’s too late though, all her machines are devoid of information. Stiles bawls. He yells, screams. Derek stays in the room and even pulls Stiles into a hug. They come and take Heather, her tiny body suddenly looks so much smaller and Stiles loses it all again. Derek takes him home. Stiles just goes to bed and locks himself in his room. Derek kind of moves in, he helps as much as he can, organizing Heather’s funeral and memorial. He helps Stiles take care of John, and explains over and over again to John where Heather is every time he asks.

Derek goes to Heather’s funeral with Stiles and John, he meets Heather’s mom, a woman named Christina.

Stiles is consumed by grief and finds comfort in Derek in his bed every night.

Then somehow, Derek admits to Stiles that he loves him. Maybe in a quiet moment after he thinks Stiles is asleep. The next morning Stiles asks Derek to leave, again. Because he himself is suddenly terrified to bring someone new into his fucked up life. Like his dad is getting worse faster than the doctor’s can explain. Except this time, Derek isn’t allowing it. Instead, he tells Stiles how much Heather meant to him as a doctor, and how much Stiles means to him as a man. Derek tells him how much he has lost in his own life, his family, and that for the first time Stiles has brought him hope and home in a way he hasn’t had in so long.

Stiles suddenly feels like an ass and admits to Derek that he might love him too but thought it was very fucked of him as a person to fall in love with a child who died and a dad who is getting worse by the day. Derek doesn’t know how to reassure or help him, so instead he pulls him into a hug and says they’ll figure it out together.  

Maybe a year later, Stiles is selling the house, moving his dad into a full time assisted living home, and into Derek’s apartment. Most of Heather’s stuff is coming with him and into a spare bedroom Derek has, because he still can’t deal with parting with the clothes that still smell like her.

Another year later, Derek asks Stiles to marry him. Stiles says no, not because he doesn’t absolutely love Derek, but he just doesn’t want to be married again.

Stiles’ dad dies. Derek gets promoted to chief of medicine. Stiles is still sheriff.

They go to the cemetery often. Stiles to see his mom, Heather, his father. Derek to see his family. Life goes on, but not without a huge Heather shaped hole in both their hearts that won’t be filled.