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Normalize going into people’s ask boxes and ask them random ass questions.

Tumblr used to be so much fun with all the asks (anonymous or otherwise), and we need to bring those back, especially now that we finally have a half-decent blocking feature in place.

Ask people things! Message them! Don’t let tumblr inbox die! It’s one of the features that made tumblr tumblr.

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Slender brothers time!

Human forms for Slender, Offender, Splendor, and Trender

Headcanons under the cut. Mentions of sex/mild suggestive stuff.

Probably wrote more about Splendor than the rest, but eh...

Slender:

Slender is the oldest child.

He is also the one that takes the lead on any birthday prep.

Very stressed out, former gifted kid vibes.

Slender runs their mother's killing company.

He's incredibly burnt out.

Someone let him rest please-!

Voice claim is High Laurie as House.

Offender:

He runs a nightclub. It's called the "Ruby Rounded Lounge".

Mostly an "offender" of very weird things, like eating hotdogs the wrong way (what? You're not meant to do it sideways?).

He's very good with making sure the place is lit up.

Has drinks people can order for different safety reasons (yk, like Angel shots - but more subtle).

Straight to fists when his siblings are in trouble.

Voice claim is Lin Manuel Miranda.

Splendor:

Alright, so off the bat: she's a bimbo.

Like, he's an airhead, ditzy, very attractive, always wearing pink...

(Phenomenal tits - and ass!)

Loves being in his human form more often - adores feeling so helpless when standing with all the other big, strong monsters out there.

(yes, it has been fucked cthulu before - and the tentacles were definitely a help).

They work as one of the people that oversee Proxy examinations and welfare. Make sure they're all up to code.

Has also been involved in monster porn (there are quite a few monsters willing to see their human form in those situations).

Loves boba.

Needs to be pampered like a princess. Otherwise he will scream.

Very big '80's material girl vibes.

She is a sugar baby for various monsters through the Underrealm.

Voice claim is Gerard Way.

Trender:

Trender does the designs for The Proxy Games costumes/uniforms.

He's a very well-respected designer.

...not a lot I can say about him.

He has a penthouse apartment in the Underrealm.

Voice claim is Dean from Community.

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Do you ever read a fic so interesting you want behind the scenes lore, ten pinterest moodboards and one of those fancy .gif edits but none of that exists bc it's a fanfic?

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Aight! Zalgo time baybee!!!

Zalgo hc appearance.

Link to picrew

Will contain some semi-suggestive content under the cut.

Aight, so right off the bat, she's a milf. Also, he's married to Jason (bc I said so) and they're both poly. Their marriage is open, and they're accepting of whoever the other chooses to sleep with.

...this is what led to Lazari and Eloise (Zalgo has horrible taste in hookups, and he should really make them wear condoms, istg).

A PTA mom in the best way possible. He spends hours baking the BEST cakes for bake sales (bc they fucking KNOW that that slut Linda uses store bought cakes!).

Zalgo comes to parent teacher conferences wearing open toed shoes and makes it his life's mission to turn a teachers life to hell.

Zalgo probs sounds like David Spade (Kuzco).

Zalgo leads his own killing company, and employs various monsters and humans. With his right hand man being Jason.

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Alright! Time for the Proxy Games lineup!

Zalgo Staff

Slender Staff

Ben (just there for shits n gigs)

Brawlers: Masky, Doby, Micah, Jason, LJ.

All-rounders: Jeff, Toby, Zero, Liu, EJ.

Assassins: Jane, Natalie, Hoodie, Nina, Ben.

Apprentices: Cody, Candy Pop.

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Right! Have a massive lore dump for my au!

So, the premise is that Slender and Zalgo run rival killing companies.

They kill people for money - or, more accurately, their proxies do.

Anyway.

Slender manages the Van Eldritch Killing Company. One of the most successful in the business. And it's been going for years.

Zalgo's, however, is "Zalgo's Assassination Practice". While it has been running even longer than Slender's, the two are roughly neck-and-neck in comparison to success.

There are multiple killing companies in the Underrealm - with two others being "The Ladies of Leviathan" - an all female killing company that primarily targets abusers - and "Cthulu Killing Incorportated" (you can guess who leads those two).

All the major killing companies (and some of the smaller ones) get together every year or so for the Proxy Games.

They're held in Brooklynn, and generally give the proxies a chance to showcase their skills, and potentially get scouted by other monsters.

See, to become a proxy - you have to take multiple tests, and a final exam. And the tests are all generally administered by your Proxy Mentor. This is an older proxy that works for the same monster that claimed you.

Now, in the time between being claimed and taking the exam, any potential proxy is up for grabs. And while most generally stick with the monster that claimed them (as in, found them and called dibs), some will shift sides.

Such as Jane, who originally worked for Leviathan.

If a more lucrative offer comes their way, they could switch to their employ.

...anyway, back to the Proxy games.

During these games, Lady Van Eldritch - the founder of the games, and the one who started the Van Eldritch killing company - oversees the events, alongside all the other killing company heads.

And every year, it's a chance for Proxies to get to know each other.

They hang out at the same hotel, the bus travel to the city is a great chance for the Proxies from the same company to bond, and its just a chance to show what they can do.

Moving on...

In my head, there are three kinds of Proxies.

The first is your brawler/buster proxy. Y'know, the ones that handle the heavy stuff, tackling people, using heavy weapons like bats and clubs. Proxies like Masky - and, to a lesser extent, Doby.

On the opposite end of the Proxy spectrum is your silent assassins. They're stealthy, stylish, and do what they do best in complete silence. These are proxies like Hoodie, Clockwork, and Nina.

Finally, towards the middle - you have your all rounders. They can be stealthy, and they can handle their own in a straight up fight. They're a good middle ground. These are proxies like Jeff, Liu, and Toby.

This ties into the Proxy games and the exams they're given during the training process as well.

You train for your speciality. So, like, Toby trains with his axes. Doby uses his bat. Stuff like that.

Now, there are specific sports for apprentice proxies, but - at the next ones (which I'll try write about) - Toby will be participating in the professional games.

Because, despite still being an apprentice proxy - he is so close to completing his training, and in record time, too.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask!

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And... asks are open!!

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Aight! So, welcome to my creepypasya blog!

I'm Mod Em. And my pronouns are she/they/it.

Now, onto the rules!

First things first, minors! Do NOT send in sexual asks/interact with suggestive posts. You will be blocked. Same goes for ageless blogs.

Secondly, do not try and flirt with the characters. This is NOT that kind of ask blog.

Thirdly, please read the list of creeps I write for! This will help.

Finally, if you send in an ask for multiple creeps: specify which ones. I will do a max of three. Otherwise I will pick three at random and write about them.

Other than that? Free game.

Now, onto the characters.

Characters:

Eldritch Monsters:

Slenderman, aeons old. He/him pronouns.

Zalgo, centuries old. Any pronouns.

Offenderman, slightly less old than Slender. He/it pronouns.

Splendorman, younger than Offender. He/she/they pronouns.

Trenderman, younger than Splendor. He/him pronouns.

Less Eldritch:

EJ, works for Slender. 42. He/him.

LJ, 300 years old, works for slender. He/him.

Ben, 27. Works for whoever pays him the most. He/it.

Jason, 450 years old, works for Zalgo. He/they. Head proxy/companion.

Now, onto the proxies

Masky, 42, works for Slender. Head Proxy. He/him.

Hoodie, 40, works for Slender. He/him.

Toby, 17, works for Slender. He/him.

Natalie, 32, works for Slender. She/they/he.

Jane, 35, works for Slender. She/her.

Jeff, 37, works for Slender. He/him.

Micah, 31, works for Zalgo, He/him. (OC)

Doby, 19, works for Zalgo. He/him.

Zero, 21, works for Zalgo. She/they/it.

Candy Pop, 15, works for Zalgo. He/him.

Other creeps, and who they hang with:

Cody, 14, apprentices under Hoodie to become a proxy. He/it.

Nina, 20, works for Zalgo. She/her.

Liu, 38. Works for Zalgo. He/they/it.

Smile, 7. Lives at Slender's. Good boy.

Grinny. 9. Lives at Zalgo's. Pretty kitty.