sharksfrommars

[sharksfrommars]

this is for @clownjacket

teenage dirt bag stan 2010s edition

I love relativity falls, because I feel like Stan would have thrived as a Gen Z teen. He was like born for it.

Stan would be bisexual with his homies, get a skin fade, listen to white boy rap from TikTok, get diagnosed with ADHD pretty much immediately. He’d be too scared to post his art online and would secretly like my little pony friendship is magic. And, tragically, he’s vape so much. He’d love vaping unfortunately.

Stan would make the best memes at school and he’d play on cool math games in the library, he’d spend far too long on Fortnite and GTA V. He’d get Sabrina Carpenter’s espresso stuck in his head. He’d love making nft and crypto scams, and being a grifter online. He’d fucking love stake (gambling) ads. He’d sell fake dating courses that just end up being a video of him running away with a bag of money. He’d have to make nearly as many apology videos as Trisha paytas.

I’m still imagining Stan with a skin fade. It’s just… so funny.

ask me later and I might draw gen z Stan twins idk I just got off the night shift.

[sharksfrommars]

BALD STAN ISNT REAL! YOU CANT STOP ME E!

Coast Guard AU canceled you guys because Stan Pines without hair is terrible.cancelled. Wrap it up.

I thought “Oh!! Maybe if I add glasses, army issued glasses, maybe then it won’t be so bad? Maybe we can save this?” WRONG.

The army issued glasses are literally called “Birth Control Glasses” because they’re so ugly. Absolutely terrible. Awful.

[sharksfrommars]

I’ve been thinking about Gravity Falls and the Alters (2025) again… so here’s an au!

The Alters but it’s Stan.

Stan pines - stuck in an anomaly surrounding the shack after Ford falls through the portal. It’s seems the portal bought through a bunch more weirdness into gravity falls. Harsher conditions, strange minerals, bits where other dimensions graze past, causing anomalies to leak through. Also the town is trapped in a time loop weirdness bubble enforced by time baby to contain the anomalies and the danger. Stan finds out Ford was building a cloning machine with a quantum computer. Stan sees his entire life in the quantum computer and sees the alternate paths he could have taken.

He accidentally makes an alter- him from a timeline where he didn’t try to get the millions to get back home. Instead, he became a mechanic and never left New Jersey. He never spoke to his dad again, but his mum came to visit some times. She tried to get Stan and Ford to reconcile but both refused, right up until Ford sent the letter and Stan came up to gravity falls…

This happens as infinitum, as Stan, the mechanic and the other alters try to figure out how to fix up the portal to bring Ford back and get him to fix it. I don’t imagine Stan would have the same alters as Jan Dolski, because that would be no fun.

So far I have Stan Mechanic and Stan Prime, but I think it’d be fun to get you guys to contribute too lmao.

Rb with ur stan alter ideas

(Its ok if u haven’t played The Alters (it’s rly good tho)

Rules are

must be a branch from canon stan

Must have skills/ job that canon Stan doesn’t have

Must end up at gravity falls to help Ford

[sharksfrommars]

He just need to not shave his head for a week I swear…. Please … buzz cut Stan isn’t real u can’t convince me

Coast Guard AU canceled you guys because Stan Pines without hair is terrible.cancelled. Wrap it up.

I thought “Oh!! Maybe if I add glasses, army issued glasses, maybe then it won’t be so bad? Maybe we can save this?” WRONG.

The army issued glasses are literally called “Birth Control Glasses” because they’re so ugly. Absolutely terrible. Awful.

[sharksfrommars]

GLORY TO WESTHELM!

(I rewatched ish civ video and drew schpood)

[sharksfrommars]

They just love emotionally manipulating him too much t-t

he rly needs an Aki…

I need a male figure that isn’t barem or spear to give Denji some clarity

Everyone is aware and just refuse to take their foot off the gas smh

[sharksfrommars]

I love relativity falls, because I feel like Stan would have thrived as a Gen Z teen. He was like born for it.

Stan would be bisexual with his homies, get a skin fade, listen to white boy rap from TikTok, get diagnosed with ADHD pretty much immediately. He’d be too scared to post his art online and would secretly like my little pony friendship is magic. And, tragically, he’s vape so much. He’d love vaping unfortunately.

Stan would make the best memes at school and he’d play on cool math games in the library, he’d spend far too long on Fortnite and GTA V. He’d get Sabrina Carpenter’s espresso stuck in his head. He’d love making nft and crypto scams, and being a grifter online. He’d fucking love stake (gambling) ads. He’d sell fake dating courses that just end up being a video of him running away with a bag of money. He’d have to make nearly as many apology videos as Trisha paytas.

I’m still imagining Stan with a skin fade. It’s just… so funny.

ask me later and I might draw gen z Stan twins idk I just got off the night shift.

[sharksfrommars]

Hey bro would you do me a platonic solid

[sharksfrommars]

Rip hans christen Andersen, you would have loved trans girls who were obsessed with mermaids as kids

“Ariel sold her voice for legs just because of a guy“

Meanwhile Ariel with legs;

Ariel already loved the human world long before meeting Eric (you don’t get a collection like hers overnight) and when she finally got a chance to explore it, she took it.

Ursula made it more about Eric than Ariel ever did.

[sharksfrommars]

got myself an MP3 player for my bday lmao.

I got me a FIIO JM21. I thought about getting an old iPod but I didn’t lmao maybe I will find one to mod eventually.

[sharksfrommars]

gang i gotta lez out into the void for a bit.

I’ve been doing a hike this weekend and I met the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen I swear and we got along really well and she knew about plants and stuff and likes cartoons and is really funny and then at the end she gave me a hug and said I was an amazing person and she was really sweet and so cute.

ok I’m done forget I said that I gotta keep my tough guy persona up

[sharksfrommars]

I’ve been playing the Alters recently, and BOY someone should put Stan Pines in that situation.

[sharksfrommars]

Here’s the context. Clippy is Against predatory business practices online, against censorship and against the gradual enshittification of the internet.

It’s a promise that, when the opportunity arises, you will stand up and be counted.

revolution Clippy! Feel free to use him

[sharksfrommars]

revolution Clippy! Feel free to use him

[sharksfrommars]

Actually, these are every lesbian couple I’ve seen

GIRLY JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT CYERCE ELEGANS

photos by Michael Plewka

If Cyerce nigricans is a butterfly, then this is a fairy... Cyerce nigricans for comparison:

photos by Ian Hutton, Kevin Lee

[sharksfrommars]

For anyone who wants to make a custom clipper pfp

I found this

[sharksfrommars]

imagine if Ford went to a specialist technical high school instead of the regular one.

maybe he got a scholarship to it, and Ford is excited to be surrounded by “his people”. Stan thinks this majorly sucks, but he’s also like 14 years old and there’s no science fair project to destroy over it so he’s kinda just forced to watch.

and they still live together

does Ford make a single friend? Would he get into WCT? I bet he enjoys the advanced classes and his school actually having funding. Will he still feel that he needs space from Stan after 4 years in separate school? After all, here’s hundreds of students who have no idea that Ford is half of a pair. They don’t even know Ford lives in the Lead Paint district of Glass Shard Beach.

how about Stan? Without his brother to cheat off, would he be forced to actually do work? Or would he instead find another scheme to float through school life. Would he get along better with his classmates? Or worse? He’d definitely be the kid that bulk buys candy to resell to the student population before being caught and getting in trouble. Would Stan actually think about the future?

I don’t know, I kinda have a headache.