sarahabein

[sarahabein]

I know I’m rarely on tumblr anymore, but obviously had to share this one.

“millennials are fucking everything up" factoid actualy statistical error. average millennial fucks up only a few times per year. The Eighth Doctor, who was born on december 31st 1999 & fucks up over 100 times each day, is an outlier and should not have been counted

[sarahabein]

yall went insane for the nine posts here's some master ones (mostly simm whoops)

more

[sarahabein]

my mums reply after i sent this to her:

[sarahabein]

when your meow is a siren

[sarahabein]

Apparently if you find a tagged Horseshoe crab and report it to Fish and Wildlife they’ll send you a certificate with info about your crab AND a pewter horseshoe crab pin! Keep your eyes peeled 👀

(Photo from the Nantucket Conservation Foundation)

[sarahabein]

Ian: “We got home eventually, and Barbara and I got together in the end! It’s fine!” Bill: “I literally ended up being converted into a cyberman and then space dust. Like.”

the thing w Ian and Barbara is, there’s a bunch of other DW companions who had much more positive starts to their relationships with the Doctor but who very likely hold significant grudges due to the way things shook out.

whereas Ian and Barbara are like ‘yeah he straight up kidnapped us and it was a terrifying experience and we almost died multiple times as a result of his actions. but we moved past it & became quite good friends!!’ 

so they’d be like. completely positive about the whole experience bcos like ultimately they had a good time and it brought them closer together and they were able to go home. but then they’d just come out w the most Harrowing Shit. like oh yeah one time the Doctor tried to bludgeon a guy to death with a rock. another time he broke his own TARDIS so he could go exploring and we all almost died of radiation poisoning and that’s how we met the daleks!! & everyone else at the companion support group is like what the shit what the shit

[sarahabein]

So my family has a Gay Pirate Plate.

Stay with me.

We do not know how the hell the Gay Pirate Plate was first acquired. This being a point of contention is actually pretty plot-relevant; the saga of the Gay Pirate Plate began with my grandmother and her sister, who, for some ungodly reason, both BADLY wanted the Gay Pirate Plate and believed it to be rightfully theirs.

I should back up, firstly, to establish: The Gay Pirate Plate is the cheapest, tackiest, ugliest plate in existence.

It is in no way a collector’s item. It is physically impossible for it to complement anyone’s decor, because the colors in it are garish. It’s just a ceramic plate with a gay pirate painted on it, and the painting is, this cannot be emphasized enough, extremely bad.

(How do we know the pirate is gay if he’s just posing on a plate? Listen. Fully 100% to stereotype, but he is. He is gay. There’s an energy. That pirate is a flaming homosexual. That pirate has sex with men and does it frequently. That pirate is fucking gay, all right, he just is.)

Anyway. The point is that this is an extremely cheap and ugly plate with a poorly-executed painting of pirate on it who is like a nine on the Kinsey scale.

My grandmother and her sister fought a blood feud over this plate for their entire lives. It would be on the wall in my grandma’s house, and then her sister would visit, and then it would be gone. She’d visit her sister and the plate would be on the wall and her sister would pretend it had always been there. She would steal it back, hang it up, and, when her sister visited, pretend it had always been there. This continued for DECADES.

When the sister died, the Gay Pirate Plate lived triumphantly in my grandmother’s house. And then my grandmother died. And my aunt, who had lived with her and been her carer throughout her life, rightfully inherited their house.

We visit my aunt after the funeral and stay with her for a week or two.

Me, my sister, and our dad. Her brother.

The three of us look at each other. We don’t say anything. We studiously avoid making eye contact with the Gay Pirate Plate mounted proud and ugly on the wall. We notice one another studiously avoiding looking at it. We notice one another noticing. We say nothing. We come to a silent consensus. We pack up to leave. We get in the van. Our aunt comes out to say goodbye. I loudly announce I need to use the restroom before we leave. She obviously stays outside to continue talking to my dad.

I take down the Gay Pirate Plate, stuff it under my oversized sweatshirt, go outside, and get in the van. She happily waves goodbye as we drive off.

Two days later my dad gets a phone call that opens with hysterical laughter and “You FUCKING ASSHOLE did you seriously STEAL THE PLATE–”

Anyway. The gay pirate plate lives in my dad’s house currently.

But he’s trying to get me and my sister out to visit him. And plate mounts are cheap.

[sarahabein]

sound on!

[sarahabein]

Doctor Who: A Summary

[sarahabein]

Doctor Who + Out Of Context DnD Quotes

[sarahabein]

Just some Lite Oboe™

I love the music of Classic Doctor Who. Just- it doesn’t fit the circumstance at all! The Doctor is being kidnapped here! And the music is just the BBC music guys just doing their own thing. I love it with all of my hearts.

Please turn your volume up:

[sarahabein]

november 1 mood

[sarahabein]

my kid made a timeline

THE MASTER – A TIMELINE

Oh boy! I rlly did it y’all. My best attempt at piecing together all of the Master’s regenerations/bodies/deaths in relation to each other. Please note that there’s probably quite a bit missing with this, and potentially errors as well, but canon’s a mess and only sort of exists! 

I pieced this together mostly through my own knowledge and obsessing over every detail in The Master’s TARDIS Databanks page, which has things in more or less chronological order, as well as in more detail.

* - The method by which the Master escaped the Cheetah World and cured himself is thus far unknown. There are multiple possibilities, but the actual answer is vague and not certain.

See below the cut for both a textless version and a version with more information on the various times the Master has crossed their own timeline!

Keep reading

[sarahabein]

i hope this email finds you a broken husk of a man

[sarahabein]

[sarahabein]

Well I can’t NOT. 

Is your dad Ron Swanson? (via blooper2112)