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family rant

my mom told me that our extended family is having a birthday party for my cousin’s first birthday, and it was the same weekend as my birthday trip, so i was fine with shifting our plans around to go see him. but then they’re having a surprise birthday for my uncle that same night and could we maybe move our plans again?

and it’s fine, i love my family and i love getting to see them. and i’m pretty chill with most anything and flexible, so that’s not a problem.

but there’s a little voice in the back of my head that’s screaming you’re always the black sheep of the family and only like two people really understand who you are—you always get the weird gifts that have no meaning, no one remembers your favorite things (literally just anything with cats would make me happy), and no one puts you first.

i know my mom and i will have a great time and we’ll get to do a lot of fun shit, but just once i would like my extended family to think of me and who i am.

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I just realized that many many people have jobs

Rb with your job, wtf do you people do while offline???

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Danny Ramirez at the Last Of Us Season Two Premiere, March 24th 2025

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PEDRO PASCAL as REED RICHARDS | Official Teaser The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025) dir. Matt Shakman

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Pedro Pascal shares this picture for Oscar Isaac's birthday (March 9, 2025)

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Danny Ramirez as Joaquin Torres | Falcon (x)

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Tell me I don't make your old gear look brand new.

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DANNY RAMIREZ as Joaquín Torres THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER | 2021

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The cast and filmmakers of Marvel Studios’ Captain America: Brave New World took to the red carpet last night at the World Premiere 🤩 (x)

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“sorry for being annoying haha ill leave you alone now” no. i want to be someone you feel safe around

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i miss my best friend

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i hope my cat knows that she’s the reason i get out of bed in the morning. she’s the reason i’m still breathing.

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PEDRO PASCAL GLADIATOR II | dir. Ridley Scott

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'i should draw' 'i should paint' 'i should write fic' 'i should read' 'i should embroider' 'i shou-

*stares at a wall for 8 hours*

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ramblings : my thoughts on friends - to - lovers yearning with dick grayson

note : i will never ever bash koriand'r or barbara ever for the sake of character development. i am strongly against hating on other characters just to uplift something else in the plot, so my take is a positive one upon them because they are flawed people just like dick grayson is. you can't adore dick grayson without understanding how good of people barbara and koriand'r are.

i know we all think of dick grayson as the ultimate friends-to-lovers fantasy, but loving him—really loving him—would feel like drowning in honey. sweet, thick, suffocating. because he’s not just someone you quietly admire from the sidelines, like a secret crush scribbled in the margins of a notebook. he’s dick grayson, beloved by everyone, a constellation of affection with a gravitational pull so strong it draws in the gods. even superman loves him. superman. 

you think you can stay detached, keep it casual, but then he smiles at you, and it’s like the world tilts, just for a moment, like you’re the only person who matters. but you’re not. you’re just one in a sea of people who orbit around him, basking in his effortless warmth, and he’ll never know. he’ll never know that your heart clenches every time he touches your arm or throws that easy laugh your way. 

it’s painful, isn’t it? watching him glide through life, forming these perfect, seamless connections with everyone. he’s always at the center, the one everyone leans on, loves, and adores. you’re standing on the outskirts, fingers pressed against the glass, watching. always watching. his exes—they’re perfect. they’re all perfect. kory, with her radiant beauty and fierceness, is a literal alien princess. barbara, sharp as glass, with her history intertwined with his like a vine. how can you hate them? you can’t. you want to, but how do you hate sunlight? how do you hate the people who were good enough to have the love you’d kill for?

and then there’s you. just… you. sitting across from him at some café, heart in your throat, trying to swallow it down with lukewarm coffee. you want to say something, but the words are like stones in your chest. he’s talking and laughing, and all you can think is, he’ll never see you that way. how could he, when the universe itself seems to conspire to shower him in love? it’s like standing in a field of wildflowers, trying to get the sun's attention. how foolish you feel—burning, yearning, pretending you’re okay with being his friend.

but you’re not. you’re not okay, and that’s what hurts the most. you smile and laugh, playing the role of the supportive friend while every fiber of your being is screaming. look at me. just once, look at me the way you looked at them. let me know the way they did. let me be the one you wake up thinking about. but he doesn’t. he won’t. and yet, you keep coming back for more, because his love is like oxygen, and you’re suffocating without it.

there’s an unbearable ache to loving someone loved by everyone else. and the worst part? he’ll never know. you’ll never tell him. you’ll sit there, heart heavy, choking on all the words you’ll never say because you can’t risk losing what little you have. so you sit in silence, watching him, loving him, drowning in that sweet, unbearable honey.

loving dick grayson as a friend would be the quietest kind of heartache. yearning wrapped in gratitude, desire suffocated by friendship.