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saelorbae · 8 months ago

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Trigger Warning ⚠️ mentions of sensitive-censored offensive language and graphic violence regarding student protests that have been going on in the US. This is a long vent word vomit.

I’ve had it.

Everyone’s had it.

I didn’t wanted to post this anywhere else because I am exhausted everywhere else and I just wanted to express myself without the bullshit of META throwing influencers at my face every two seconds to drown out the shit that matters.

There’s not a day these days where I literally don’t say out loud how I am ready to just vanish into thin air. Even though I am lucky— to have the ability to be in academia, have an education, have access to resources, health, and humans who care about me. I have a phone I can vent on and roof over my head which some people don’t even have in this dystopia.

But I’m struggling, along with millions of other young people born into my generation and even younger now. I can’t take it anymore.

When we express one sliver of weakness. Show the tiniest morsel of humanity and humility, we get cussed at, screamed at, shot at, sniped at, pinned down, spat on, harassed, chased, bombed, teargassed, ganged-up on—, ridiculed, beaten, cornered, caged, jailed, threatened, joked about, snickered at, thrown-under-the bus, punished, oppressed, gaslit, abused, and killed spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and intellectually by powers beyond us.

Powers decided by outdated, pretentious, and greedy people who use every opportunity to twist the world into one that favors discrimination of diversity, equality, and justice.

Whether it’s the government, law enforcement, big conglomerates, and massive news businesses. They disgust me with their behaviors and response with the issues that have been plaguing this country.

I’m also sick of the petty brainwashed soldiers of my generation who are all too quick to help our nation’s worst— by allowing the spread of misinformation onto an even younger generation. It’s embarrassing to be in the same age bracket as these individuals.

Because posting an aesthetic lilac blurb on instagram and appropriating POC movements to gaslight people into thinking protesting for ceasefire is wrong— is incredibly morally questionable, deplorable, and vomit-inducing.

Also hundreds of literal strangers who have yelled the most disgusting language towards peers, faculty, and community members make me question the complacency of the campus administrators to these violent mobs.

They were literally trolls that found their way out of their “designer” “head to toe” chronically-foxTV-worshipping basement to yell at all of us from racial slurs to insults about how “broke” we were in person while wagging their fingers.

These counter protestors and online trolls pillaged our students with racial slurs, sexism, misogyny, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, supremacist ideology. Telling us that we deserved to be shot at, to be beaten: we should replace the hostages and let terrorists massacre us. We should be xxxped, harassed. We don’t work enough we are just complaint too much. Why don’t we get a job? Why don’t we go back to school and stop wasting our trust fund money from our parents? But also why are we so ugly and broke? Why are we such sensitive whiny little pxnsies? Why are we so xxxxxed? So helpless and hopeless why don’t we go pray for our salvation? Why don’t we just fall inevitably to our police overlords? Our police will take care of us: “free the police!” thank goodness for them! We should get kxxxed and they should kxxx us. Good on the police for making sure this nation’s youth and mentors sustain injuries from being fired at, tear-gassed, maced, tasered, dragged, shoved, beaten, chased, mobbed, surveil-lanced, threatened , assaulted, jailed, dogpiled, flared at, fireworks illegally thrown at, face-planted and pinned down, unmasked, doxxxed, flashbombed, smoked out, cornered, mobbed ruthlessly— while being deployed in full SWAT gear, bullet proof vests, rubber bullets, flashes, batons, rifles, sniper rifles, tasers standing by until they made sure protestors were exhausted having been at the encampment protesting since five days ago to then tear down and arrest everyone.

Elderly and the young of our schools were dragged forcefully and face-planted to the ground as coppers load them onto prison buses across the nation. When all they did was chant and defend themselves from mobs and police in SWAT gears with makeshift barriers of wood and plastic.

I’m tired of our students and faculty having only one another to lean on. I’ve had enough. I’m sick of counter protestors masquerading as informed and empathic people when they have said and acted on some of the most horrible things. The fact that I know and seen peers with serious injuries, bleeding, fractures, and burns is concerning.

I’m sick of administrators everywhere gaslighting and tricking media into believing the protestors and encampments from the past week and months— are unlawful and unconstitutional. And the media participates in the abuse by painting us as criminals when our schools have sacrificed us, faculty, and community safety. Because: they— don’t want to do the work to change anything.

People think we are joking. People think it’s not serious. People think we are picnicking . People think kids just don’t want to work anymore.

Well I have news for you buddy: most of us are nearly graduating from or just started a painfully elitist, soul sucking path down into scrapping by as we spend a huge part of our youth chasing down enough job opportunities to pay off loans to an education that we can’t afford with each passing year. Most of us have no food security, home security, and job security; even though we slave years away since childhood in institutions to adhere to the standard of an ableist, elitist society. We are punished and shunned socially and economically when we don’t meet the standards or show the tiniest bit of exhaustion.

You can criticize us for looking “too old” for our age. You can criticize us for seeming to not know how to write letters(by the way— we can, it’s not hard). You can criticize us for our obsession with capitalism(which we have you to thank for). You can criticize us for being obsessed with our phones doom scrolling away. But you are kidding yourself if you don’t think the most of are doing our very best with the cards we were dealt— and you all contributed to the hellhole we are growing up in.

You should’ve expected this generation to demand change and take action into our own hands when we became legal adults. We are sick of living in a system of passiveness, complacency, and ignorance. We are sick twiddling our thumbs as rotting pieces of flesh bags from every continent are literally running us all into the ground.

I’ve had it.

We’ve had it.

Everyone’s had it,

If you don’t want to help us? Fine.

Leave us alone. Don’t have anything good to say? Keep walkin’ and leave us alone.

Stop pretending you care about us.

“You know who I really feel sorry for? The seniors who are about graduate! They should be enjoying their last semester!”

There are no universities left in Palestine, schools everywhere are threatening their students with academic consequences for exercising free speech, people had to literally hold onto our friends and professors to make sure police don’t claw them away and throw them in the slammer buses. Jewish students within encampment were attacked and arrested for standing with their peers at peaceful protest— So why don’t you and your cushy “journalism” coverage think next time before you say something so embarrassing on national television.

As per tradition. I’ll add a song suggestion or two.

#Spotify #SoundCloud #free palestine #vent post #on my last raisin #🍉

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