rustbeltjessie

[rustbeltjessie]

by tucker

[rustbeltjessie]

Help a trans woman stay housed!!

Hello its troppy! I'm still really struggling due to being in between jobs and being a transfem suffering from PTSD. Would you all be able to cover me $2000 for immediate living expenses/food/meds? overall goal is $4000 as I continue to stabilize! Thank you so much! links below!

venmo (redloop)

c$happ ($TropScream)

paypal (tropscream)

gfm

[rustbeltjessie]

anyone help a trans girl pay some bills and eat? unemployment check is not enough to do both for 2 people and i won't get paid again for a few weeks after i go back to my job next week : /

pypal vnmo ko-fi

thank you!

[rustbeltjessie]

Some (not so) recent notable homemade foodstuffs, pt. 2:

July 21: Grilled chicken and shrimp and veggies (+ pineapple) with a teriyaki sauce, served over fried rice.

July 22: Ziti and Italian sausage, garnished with basil from our patio garden.

July 23: Steak, black bean, and jalapeño quesadillas.

July 25: Honey-Garlic Salmon with Grapefruit

July 26: Turkish kofta-inspired burgers with Greek-inspired pasta salad.

[rustbeltjessie]

The writing has been on the wall for years, but now it’s in the boldest of fonts: if there is porn that you like, games with even remotely adult or queer content that you enjoy, queer art you appreciate that features nudity or discussions of bodies, works of fiction that you love that features controversial subjects or themes, or any queer historical records that you think should continue existing, now is the time to build an archive of them. If you are panicked by the growing libricide of LGBTQ and NSFW records from the internet, this is one very impactful thing that you can do right now to help.

Download the files, store them on an encrypted drive, upload them to a protected server, and communicate with other lovers of sexual art and queer records, so that you can help build a library of it that is accessible to us, and those that come after us in the future. If you have the capability, keep meticulous records of what you have collected — where you found it, who originally made it, what year it comes from, the spaces and communities it was associated with, the names of the people who brought it into existence.

As the burning of the Hirschfeld archives and the catastrophic losses of the AIDs crisis taught us, queer history evaporates quickly when there is no one around to keep circulating it. But you can be a part of what keeps our stories flowing, the blood moving through us that keeps us animated and alive. And you do not have to be a trained historian or especially skillful with technology, though now is also a wonderful time to learn how to be a better archivist. Just begin doing something. Save and document all that you can — in a private space that you control, and that technology companies cannot purge.

It is also important at this time to understand how LGBTQ content bans happen on a tactical level, and resist in kind. Collective Shout pressures platforms into removing NSFW content by contacting payment processors, such as Visa and MasterCard, and convincing those companies to not process any transactions involving sexual works. Collective Shout claims that it only took about a thousand phone calls to get the companies to enforce a NSFW ban. We can also call them in large numbers, and demand that adult & queer content gets put back.

If a game that you paid good money for on Steam or Itch.io has been removed in the NSFW ban, you have grounds to demand a refund.Give your payment processor a call, make a complaint, and get them to issue you a charge back. This may help place pressure on both payment processing companies and game platforms to revise their policies.

It is also important during this time to study the recent history of LGBTQ & NSFW censorship on the internet, and learn from communities that have been able to resist it successfully. One of the very first groups to be targeted by efforts like these was actually the hypnosis kink community, back in the late ’90s and early 2000s. During that time, an avid porn site user reportedly disputed hundreds of dollars in charges, alleging that he had been hypnotized into giving his credit card information away against his will. To avoid future such cases, payment processors like Visa and Mastercard refused to honor any transactions for any content involving hypnosis or mind control, and this has remained their policy ever since.

In spite of harsh repression at the hands of credit card companies and digital platforms, the hypnokink community has continued to thrive, and even grown in popularity and public acceptance in recent years. As many of you know, I am a long-term member of this diverse & queer-affirming community — I spent all of last weekend at an in-person erotic hypnosis convention, which I blogged all about on Instagram — so I know a bit about how we have managed to cope with being attacked and have come out stronger and healthier than we were before.

I think that any of us who are concerned by the stripping of queer and sexual content from the internet can learn from how the hypnokink community has responded to similar censorship over the years, and adopt some of their strategies.

One of the first things that the hypno-kink community learned once it was under attack was not to self-snitch. When we got banned from mainstream porn sites, we found the seedy, poorly regulated platforms that were not as likely to enforce payment processors’ ban on hypnosis content. On sites like Pornhub and Patreon, we learned to use terms like mesmerized and other euphemisms instead of hypnosis or mind control, or to merely reference media properties where hypnosis is featured without saying it outright.

We became data hoarders, snapping up copies of every porn video, erotic audio file, animated gif, and illustration featuring hypnosis that we could find, and then sharing it on forums with our fellow fetishists. We learned to make and share our work in private — in chat rooms, on password-protected servers — and began hosting hypnotic content on shared drives and websites we didn’t widely advertise.

Rather than allowing outside groups to censor us, we took community responsibility for maintaining standards of consent and safety, and gave no quarter to predators. At conventions, we require attendees to complete consent quizzes, and provided dungeons with consent monitors. We offer classes on consent, safety, and developing agency as a hypnotic subject. Many of our events ban the use of substances and require COVID vaccinations and KN95 masks in order to reduce risk. We continually debate how best to navigate riskier kink practices and negotiate encounters with one another.

We have continued gathering in person, and in small virtual conferences, because there are conversations about our shared passion that require an in-depth conversation among people who are at a higher level of understanding. We discuss more complex, nuanced topics in rooms where people are prepared to have them, and we understand that every rule has the power to cause exclusion and damage — and appreciate that even the best guidelines need to be broken sometimes. (For example, plenty of people still benefit from using substances for their mental health, even at a “substance-free” con).

Because the kink we are playing with can be psychologically very risky, we emphasize the importance of being in community with one another and vetting play partners, and speak about our experiences so that we can better understand what we’re going through and what we need. We do what we can to unlearn our shame and stigma, and to bring our feelings and needs out into the open — but not in front of corporations and social media platforms that will only punish and censor us.

We come out to one another, and commune to build better art, more responsible and effective hypnotic files, to write hotter smut, to have better scenes, to be able to play at the edges of consent and consciousness with intention and responsibility. This does not erase all of the risk, but it allows us to be informed of it, and to accept what difficulties and costs we take on. Nearly everyone finishes a scene by asking who needs aftercare. We prepare for the emotional drops of having seen and experienced intense shit — and for the most part, we are grateful that we get to dive with such strong parachutes.

It is this combination of privacy, technological shrewdness, dedicated archival and resource-building work, and loving community responsibility that has made us robust. Though so many outside forces have attempted to silence us and portray us as a group of perverted predators, we’ve continued spreading the truth about who we are and helping people who share our desires to find one another, and revel in our passions as safely as we can.

We have escaped the fear mongering and corporate pressure, and made something completely our own. All queer people and all makers of sexual or erotic art can do the same. We will get through this, but we will have to be more than just passive consumers of content.

We will have to become archivists, librarians, developers, community stewards, consent monitors, peer educators, advocates, organizers, and creators in our own right. And we can do it. Queer people have been producing creative work about our identities and inner erotic lives for as long as we have existed, and we have always been able to find one another in the back rooms of bars, in small bookstores in cities, in veiled language in personal ads, and everywhere else that we have tricked our enemies into not looking.

I wrote all about the suppression of queer & erotic art on the internet, and how the hypnosis kink community provides a case study in how to properly resist it. You can read the full piece for free on Substack.

[rustbeltjessie]

Your face when sleeping is sublime And then you open up your eyes

Then comes pancake factor number one Eyeliner, rose hips and lip gloss, such fun You're a slick little girl You're a slick little girl

Rouge and coloring, incense and ice Perfume and kisses, ooohhh, it's all so nice You're a slick little girl You're such a slick little girl

Now, we're coming out Out of our closets Out on the streets Yeah, we're coming out

Vote for the artist you think is the cuntiest of all (or of the two.)

Lou Reed (1942-2013) The Velvet Underground - vocals and guitar; solo Songs: "Heroin," "Perfect Day" Propaganda: "Known for his transgressive lyrics, that were often inspired by literature and poetry."

Rob Halford (1951-) Judas Priest - vocals Songs: "The Ripper," "Evening Star" Propaganda: "being gay in a metal band and having to hide it for 20 years takes serious balls"

Visual Propaganda for Lou Reed:

[rustbeltjessie]

ok, normally i hate doing this, but things are dire. i woke up to my landlord sending me a $500 water bill, and i ABSOLUTELY do not have the money for it rn.

if y'all could send me anything, it would really help. ._.

paypal

pls share widely and send me good vibes, ty!

[rustbeltjessie]

Welp, it's my birthday and hrt-iversary again. 4 years now of being me and it keeps getting better.

Wanna help an author/artist/leatherworker/tattooist out with rent and bills as a birthday present? http://paypal.me/tormentedartifacts

I suppose if you wanna get me something physical you can, but, well, that means combing through my entire unsorted wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2XYVJF51Z1W7P

Or you could always just get yourself a book! That's always good too! https://www.amazon.com/stores/Dee-Arbacauskas/author/B0DC4NQB1M

Okay, meanwhile, I have blog posts coming, a new book to start serializing, and well, a lot coming, including vending events this fall, so stay tuned.

[rustbeltjessie]

I got another Mix Tape Monday request, from @kickbackjustrelax, for a mermaid-themed playlist. This was an excellent request, as mermaids are extremely my jam (I even have a tattoo of one!). So, here’s a playlist about and/or from the point of view of mermaids and adjacent creatures (sirens and rusalkas).

with your mermaid hair and your teeth so sharp

Agnes Milewski - Neptune’s Daughter

Florence + the Machine - Mermaids

Daughter Darling - Mermaid

Jennifer Cutting’s Ocean Orchestra - Call of the Siren

The Decemberists - Rusalka, Rusalka / Wild Rushes

[rustbeltjessie]

it's Monday, happy Monday! perhaps even Mixtape Monday? if you're willing, I'd love to request a 5 track playlist relating to whatever your favorite thing you've done so far this year! and if today's not a good day, then instead I will simply hope tomorrow goes better for you! <3

This was exactly what I needed today, so thanks! Anyway, my favorite thing I’ve done so far this year isn’t just one thing, it’s really a series of things that all added up to one big thing—and that is, finally moving north to my beloved peninsula, my longtime home away from home, now my home home, Door County. These tracks all relate to specific places/landscapes up here, or just give me general Door County vibes/vibes to do with the move itself.

I will call the north woods home.

Adam Bokesch - Cedar

Kendy Gable - North Woods

Nick Drake - Northern Sky

Craig Cardiff - Lake Michigan

Tom Waits - Cold Cold Ground

[rustbeltjessie]

It's been a slow week of having to do tons of irl stuff and not a lot of work, and I need to get at least 500 in some my power/internet don't get cut off tomorrow and then cover a refund past that. Help a girl out and donate? http://paypal.me/tormentedartifacts

Or if you wanna get something in return, there's always http://tormentedartifacts.com

[rustbeltjessie]

It’s always weird when you find out someone on here you’ve never interacted with beyond liking a few of their posts over the course of years (like, never talked to, never even were mutuals with) has you blocked. I’m not upset really, more just confused. Like. What’d I do? Did they decide to check out my blog once and just hated what they saw there? Huh????

[rustbeltjessie]

Questions to help break through a ‘I can’t do the Thing’ wall

I’m not doing the Thing, but if I were to do the Thing, what would be the first bit to tackle?

eg: I’m having trouble washing up. I’ll start by just getting all the dishes into one place and emptying the drying rack.

Often, you might find that the first bit was what you were stuck on, and now you’ve done that, you feel ready to do the whole Thing. But if not, that’s fine, you’ve set things up to be easier later! Similarly:

What can I do to set things up for when I’m ready?

eg: I need to apply for a job vacancy I’ve seen. That feels really overwhelming and I don’t have the energy right now. I will create an email with the correct address in and open the files I’ll need for tomorrow.

Half-done is half more than you had before, and it will make things easier when you come back. Reduce the friction and complexity as much as you can.

Will this task actually be any easier if I do it later?

eg: I need to re-spray my waterproofs. It’s sunny today but it’s going to be raining all week, so it would actually be easier to do it now so I can do it outside and let them air. ‘Kay FINE, guess I will.

or: I want to make progress on my Creative Endeavour. I’m having a lot of trouble focussing at the moment but tomorrow I’ll be better rested and my Creative Group will be meeting. It will genuinely be easier then so I should stop worrying about it for now.

Sometimes, you realise that it would legitimately be easier to do a task later. Other times, you realise it would suck more to put it off, and that can help give you a nudge to do it sooner. It also helps reframe it in your head from “will I do the Thing?” to “when will I do the Thing?”

These are some questions that I use myself and I thought I’d share them to see if they’re handy for anyone else!

[rustbeltjessie]

A comic I posted last night for patrons, but I wanted to share here too! This has been the time lately 😂😩😔👏✨️

But in seriousness, capitalism worms are rough! But try to ignore them and shoo them out! Take care of yourselves and rest, babes 🥳💖

[rustbeltjessie]

I will say first that I believe any woman, or anyone who can get pregnant, should be able to choose not to have children for any reason, including that they don’t want to.

And then I’ll add this quote by Ariel Gore:

It’s always a mistake to give up art for safety except in short-term, emergency situations where self-preservation has to take priority. We can’t give up art for safety longterm. And we’re not doing out kids any favors if we try.

It does make you wonder if part of progressives’ extreme resistance to early motherhood is that they do believe, deep down, that once a woman has children, she can’t do her own work anymore, shouldn’t have her own life anymore. It’s a place where feminism hasn’t won out over internalized notions that the Family Values people were right—that a mother being herself is a mother being selfish, that our children will suffer if we’re whole and complicated people. And of course I reject that.

For me, the answer is to reinvent motherhood, not just to delay enslavement to it. The answer is to reinvent art, too, so that we’re not just trying to squeeze our complicated experience into the oppressor’s format in hopes of the oppressor’s praise. (x)

Erase the idea that a woman is no longer free after having a child. Erase the idea that a woman is no longer capable of chasing her dreams after having a child. Erase the idea that a woman will lose her beauty after having a child. Erase the idea that a teen mom’s life is ruined after having a child. Erase the idea that single mothers can’t be independent after having a child.

Erase the idea that children are a woman’s biggest enemy.

[rustbeltjessie]

From an interview with Ursula K Le Guin