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plot twist:

chandry falls head over heels with whoever the mc is romancing and the game turns into a dating sim where you gotta swoon your ro before chandry can lay on the unbeatable discount prices charm

anyway, bls enjoy this horrific crackfic au i wrote based on this terrible idea, lmao

So sorry Lena but from now on all the shepherds will be doing is helping Chandry win over the one he loves.... Sorry I don't make the rules..... Shepherds of Haven? More like Shepherds of Chandry

Riel: “I don’t understand why you dragged us out here in the middle of the night”

MC: “we’re going to help my friend”

Trouble: “what’s wrong with your friend?”

MC: “he hasn’t been able to find love”

Blade: I’ll fucking kill you

Shery: “oh, that’s so sweet! I want to help your friend find love!”

Lavinet: “me, too! where is the handsome devil?”

MC: “he’s waiting at a restaurant for his blind date to arrive”

Chase: “who’s the blind date?”

MC, ominously: “one of you”

~~~

(later, the group mauls MC when they get to the restaurant and see Chandry waiting like:)

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The ‘It’s Always Sunny In Haven’ St. Patrick’s Day Special! (Part 3 of ???)

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The ‘It’s Always Sunny In Haven’ St. Patrick’s Day Special! (Part 2 of ???)

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The ‘It’s Always Sunny in Haven’ St. Patrick’s Day Special! (Part 1 of ???)

@shepherds-of-haven​ happy st. patrick’s day!

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@foxofsunholt

E A R S

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@foxofsunholt

E A R S

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sleepytime poppy: fox edition

also @foxofsunholt if i may suggest

instead of big long belt-tail, what if...big floofy pillowtail?

also also! bonus mystery sketch eyes emoji

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hello there guess who can’t decide which ears to give this mouth-breathing, bark-chomping, rock collecting puddle of wet fur and abandonment issues

bls help ya gorl im so torn

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@foxofsunholt bls accept my love and support for you, your dog, and this game

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chaotic plantser both in writing and in my everyday life somebody take the fuckin wheel because i dont know how to stop

Via @CheyanneALepka at Twitter.

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☆ cupcake pink and purple ☆

just wanted to make a new avatar for my birthday

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Merry Christmas to @yoshibb! I was your Secret Santa!

Hope you like some St. Nate! :3

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U ok? I don't really know you but strangely enough I had a dream that you posted that you had a serious illness

Oh, that’s so sweet of you to check up on me!!

Don’t worry, I’m in perfectly good health. 💖 Maybe your dream was about me suffering through two tests next week? lol Thanks again for checking up on me like this, it really made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. 😊

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👀👀👀

let's collab, bby

Here, my resume:

---

"Do you go long without eggs or fresh fruit when you set sail for other ports?" she asks. The firelight catches on her borrowed dress when she moves to take another sip of wine; she looks away from him as she drinks to gaze upon the mess of his desk.

He cannot find it in himself to feel anger, not when he would hardly be able to stand his own visage were he in her shoes. Still, he finds his shoulders sagging, and if she notices he certainly can't tell.

"So long as we stay within Ophaesian waters, perishables are an affordable luxury," he answers, and ducks his head to take a bite out of his steak when she turns to look at him, if only to spare her from having to look at such a terrible sight.

"And when you're on the open waters?" she asks, resting her utensils to the side of plate and...

...giving him her full attention, staring directly into his eye.

Waiting.

He has to remember to chew and swallow the piece of meat, so as to not answer with his mouth full. Just because he is a pirate—though and argument could still be made against it—does not give him an excuse to flout table etiquette.

"No," he says finally, and takes a sip of his own wine to clear his suddenly stuffed throat. "No. In the open waters, it's much more difficult. Whatever perishables in the vessel are consumed first, then preserved foods."

"...And...after—?"

"I would never let it come to that."

She looks down at her plate, and then back up at him. "May I try some? Preserved food? I've never seen it before."

He almost laughs at that. Almost.

"You would not like it."

She frowns at him, for the first time since she's come aboard he realizes.

"And how would you know? You won't even give me the chance."

His purses his lips and nods. "You are right, I can hardly say to know you well enough to judge your tastes or preferences. Allow me to rectify this."

His seat scrapes against the aging wood as he stands up and strides over to the door, quickly sending a crewman to retrieve bits of dried meats and fruits.

When he turns around, closing the door behind him, he is surprised to see her mouth agape.

"What's wrong?"

"I—" She looks down at her plate, cheeks flushed. "I did not expect you to...to listen to me."

Something stirs in his chest, a tightening of his heart...fear? No, no...he knows intimately what fear feels like, the dread and doom pressing against your neck.

This...this is something else entirely.

"Jerky and fruits, captain," the runner says, carrying a crude metal plate upon which the ugliest and most unappetizing foods known to man are arranged in a lovely geometric formation. The crewman steps forwars and places them gently on the unadorned wooden table with wide grin. "Eat well, my lady."

"Thank you, Phaeren," she says, smiling sweetly at him.

Since when did she memorize his crew's names? Their faces?

He should be afraid, agitated or worried that she might be able to identify them all and set his whole fleet to burn the moment she steps back on the capital, but his heart only tightens again.

And then he laughs, and broken, bark-like thing, when he sees her attempting to cut the jerky with a knife and fork.

He coughs, covering his mouth when sees her cheeks reddening further.

"Apologies, my lady, I did not mean cause you embarrassment."

"I will forgive you," she says, grunting and putting so much effort into cutting that he fears the porcelain would break, "on the condition...that you...help me...!"

"Of course," he says, and goes over to stand behind her. She cranes her neck up to beckon him to help.

He's smiles at her indignant squeak when he grabs the jerky with his hands and rips it apart with ease. He pops one half into his mouth and offers her the other.

She stares at it, then up at him, then back at the jerky. He withholds more laughter at the sight of her gnawing at the piece until finally it gives and she chews for minutes on end, during which time he rounds the table to take his seat once again.

"Well?" He asks. "Verdict?"

She makes an awful, terrible face as she swallows.

"You were right," she says miserably. "It is...not very good."

"I never said it was bad," he says. "Hardly. When you've not eaten in days it tastes better than anything you've ever eaten."

"Any port in a storm," she says, sighing and laughing in equal measure.

He nods, and they go back to eating good steak in a comfortable silence.

@fantasyfawkes

Because tumblr is a baby-back bitch that keeps eating my asks, I’m just gonna tag you in my incoherent thoughts.

ahem

Pirate Captain Atheron treating captive MC with the utmost dignity and respect (as he is with all his captives), and so the MC treats him and his men well in turn while negotiations for the MCs ransom are made.

But one night over dinner (bc Pirates of the Caribbean fucked me up good as a youngster) the MC confesses that she doesn’t even want to go back to the capital, and explains to him how she’s treated due to Eraven’s dislike of her.

He’s quiet and doesn’t say much else (not that he ever does, really) but his mind is made up. The next morning, they sail for open waters; no further negotiations will take place and the MC is being “conscripted” into his pirate crew.

And then…

oh

And then…

slow burn pirate-mance mateys 👌 👌 👌

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Chapters: 2/? Fandom: The Wayhaven Chronicles (Interactive Fiction) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Female Detective/Nathaniel "Nate" Sewell Characters: Nathaniel "Nate" Sewell, Adam du Mortain, Female Detective (The Wayhaven Chronicles), Ethan Murphy, Felix Hauville, Mason (The Wayhaven Chronicles), Tina Poname, Rebecca (The Wayhaven Chronicles), Mayor Friedman

Summary:

   'Twas a long time ago, longer now than it seems        In a place that perhaps you've seen in your dreams.        For the story that you are about to be told        Began with the holiday worlds of old.        Now, you've probably wondered where holidays come from.        If you haven't, I'd say it's time you begun.

It's the Nightmare Before Christmas AU!!!

Just in time for Halloween and Christmas!!

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Chapters: 2/? Fandom: The Wayhaven Chronicles (Interactive Fiction) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Female Detective/Murphy (The Wayhaven Chronicles) Characters: Murphy (The Wayhaven Chronicles), Female Detective (The Wayhaven Chronicles) Additional Tags: Teasing, Grinding, Biting, (lol no shit), Unexpected Romantic Fluff, suddenly fluffy, how did the fluff get here where did it come from? nobody knows

Summary:

smut found dead in miami

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Fallen Hero Series (Interactive Fiction) Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Herald/Sidestep Characters: Herald (Fallen Hero), Sidestep (Fallen Hero), Male Ortega (Fallen Hero) Additional Tags: Wow, ok, first of all..., Angst, So much angst, Herald's POV, it's bad guys, I thought Evil!Nate was bad but wow no I was fucking wrong

Summary:

@impeccably-stressed You can make me sad but you can’t hurt me.

i love him and i still killed him with my own two hands, by my own will. You can’t do more damage than this.

Kids, the lesson here is...I have maladaptive coping mechanisms never say I can't write something that will hurt you worse than how you've already hurt yourself. I will take it as a challenge.

@fallenhero-rebirth pls validate me