rawbutprecious

[rawbutprecious]

Shall we look at the scene between Metatron and Nina? This post does a fabulous job examining the context. It points out how Metatron asks, “Do people ever ask for death?". Nina replies that they don't. This seems like foreshadowing - especially considering those above mentioned details. There was surprisingly little mention of food in season 2, as far as I could tell, but there were Eccles cakes. Puritans equated them to paganism and debauchery. Aziraphale could be sinning by fighting against Heaven. Also, they can catch fire if heated in the microwave. Could this be harking back to the bookshop fire and also the death of Aziraphale?

So, Aziraphale arrived in Edinburgh with a briefcase we never see him open and a hat that reads, among other things, "PRESS 66" on it, right?

And we might think that these are just Aziraphale's journalist cosplaying accessories but I think there are some hints that there's a bit more going on here than we might think-- all of it very relevant to The Finale.

We think that Aziraphale's arrival in Edinburgh is the first time that we see these things but, in true Good Omens form, the hat and briefcase are both actually glimpsed in a prior scene... rather significantly placed in that earlier scene, even.

Here they are, sitting together, the hat atop the briefcase, both in front of Jimbriel's once Fly-containing box, beside/behind the memory-wiped Muriel, in the scene below:

So, as Muriel is sitting there, not remembering Aziraphale, and as Aziraphale is sitting there, remembering Muriel and thinking all the things about the fact that they don't remember him at all? In the shot between them is the box into which Jim put his memory and brought it to Crowley and Aziraphale for safe keeping. In front of that box? Is Aziraphale's press hat and briefcase, seemingly drawing some connections between the journalist accessories and the memory plots in S2. Hmm...

What this scene also shows is that Aziraphale didn't just magic this stuff up as props when he arrived in Scotland. Even though we didn't see them in the car on the way up, they were there on the passenger seat for him to retrieve upon his arrival. He brought them with him from the shop. He packed them overnight and they were there, all ready to go, prior to Muriel's arrival, which coincided with Crowley coming over and moving the plants out of the car because Aziraphale planned to take it to Scotland. Why does this matter?

Because it might signal that there's more to the briefcase and the hat with its press credentials than we might initially suspect.

I think it would be safe to say that Aziraphale, by this point in the story, would be concerned that his memories were in danger.

He knows he's always been on a collision course with falling and this is all escalating pretty quickly in S2 in the two days prior to Aziraphale packing this press stuff and taking the car. Gabriel was The Supreme Archangel and he couldn't remember who he was and the archangels had shown up to threaten them and say that they're going to be spying on him even more closely, sending another angel to bug them the next day... the memory-wiped Muriel being quite an interesting choice, as that's sending quite a threatening message. Aziraphale also had roped Maggie and Nina into this and he knew he was likely going to have a confrontation with Heaven and Hell coming.

One of the first things he'd be concerned about would be his memories, right? and it's here where we can mention what we later learn about what Heaven can and cannot do regarding those memories... things that are new to us but that Aziraphale likely would have already known and factored into his plan, as we'll see.

Hints are given to this all season via Gabriel but it really becomes overt in this scene here:

This scene proves that Gabriel's memories aren't just in The Fly in S2-- they're also still in his mind. His memories are shown to be in two places at once. Gabriel's memories-- ones even directly related to the trauma he underwent-- actually began to come back before The Fly, in this scene. Gabriel felt safe and like he was talking with someone who could understand in this scene with Crowley so the memories began to come back for him.

The point here is that this scene shows that, when Gabriel "took his memories out" and put them into The Fly, what he was really doing was basically backing them up. He "uploaded" his memories into The Fly for safekeeping so he could retrieve them later, as a way to keep it so that they wouldn't be erased forever, but those same memories are still also on the "hard drive" of his mind. They were just mostly inaccessible to him for almost all of S2 because of trauma.

Before you say well, Gabriel might be a special case because he took his own memories out to avoid Heaven attacking him? Consider that Crowley didn't have a chance to do that-- but he tells Gabriel he knows how Gabriel feels.

Crowley has had the same experiences with his own memories. He's been able to bring some back at different times, without a lot of context, but a lot remains blocked. Crowley saying that he's been able to retrieve some memories means that those memories are still there in his mind, just very painful and difficult to access.

The idea might be that their memory loss is actually trauma-blocking. If Crowley's situation has the same effect as Gabriel's, it suggests that Heaven can't actually take people's memories-- they can only block them.

This would then be suggesting, as a lot in S2 did, that Gabriel didn't develop retrograde amnesia from taking his memories out-- he developed amnesia from the trauma he underwent.

When he felt safe enough to confront some of that trauma, the memories started to come back to him a bit.

What does this have to do with Aziraphale's briefcase, you ask?

It is connected because Gabriel's memory loss being from the trauma of Heaven trying to kill him, not from putting his memories into The Fly, proves that an angel could take his out their memories and not get amnesia from doing so.

Gabriel's story is showing that they could take out their memories whenever they want and still retain those memories also in their minds and be perfectly fine.

It's showing that Aziraphale could have backed up his memories in S2 without experiencing memory loss-- and the press hat and the briefcase are tied to just how he might have done that.

Aziraphale might have taken one look at Gabriel and his memory situation and the archangels circling the shop and thought that it would be a good idea to backup his memories and store them somewhere safe for if this all went pear-shaped.

What's interesting is that then, in a parallel shot to Aziraphale arriving in Edinburgh, we have this later scene when Aziraphale returns to London... note what's missing:

We see him park by the suit shop-- but no suitcase/briefcase this time. No hat. He's also taken off the raincoat. We never see them again for the rest of the season but we see a whole bunch of scenes that hint at where they are and why Aziraphale has left them in that location.

In this moment, we spend a strange amount of time on watching Aziraphale get out of the car and look around, hands-free, pat The Bentley, go for a little walk for a moment...

He talks to Nina, he goes back to the bookshop and greets Crowley and gets an armful of plants. The Bentley is largely the focus of the scene with Nina as well and its moving up in a scene that involves Nina and her bicycle-- another "mad 'American' woman on a bicycle", in parallel to Anathema in S1-- recalls Aziraphale miracling a bike rack onto the boot of The Bentley to transport Anathema's bike back to Jasmine Cottage. The key to getting Anathema and her bike safely home to her cottage was the bike rack Aziraphale made happen; the key to getting him and Crowley safely to the South Downs Cottage might be what Aziraphale stashed in the trunk of the car on his trip.

Here's where we can see that scenes before and around this involving Shax and Crowley show us pretty emphatically where the briefcase and the press hat are not located in the car...

They can't be on the passenger seat as they were on the way to Edinburgh because Shax wouldn't have been able to sit there when she got into the car on the drive back from Edinburgh. They also can't be in the backseat because the scene adjacent to Aziraphale's return to London is he and Crowley loading the plants back into the backseat. Crowley would have handed him his things if they were back there.

So, we have all of these shots of Aziraphale's return that are, among other things, emphasizing that the hat, the raincoat, and the briefcase are all not things he's taking out of The Bentley's trunk upon his return, even if they are his belongings and he brought them with him from the bookshop. He's intentionally leaving them all in the Crowley's car.

Aziraphale definitely did not leave his memories in a briefcase in The Resurrectionist Pub, even though that's the last place we saw the briefcase. How do we know that?

Because let's say that we're right here and Aziraphale did put his memories into the briefcase... either into something else that he then locked into the briefcase or just into the briefcase itself. What's the one problem with this?

He locked them in there for safekeeping, right? So...

He can't just leave the briefcase for Crowley-- he also needs to leave the key to the briefcase, yes? He needs to leave the combination somewhere... but he also has to hide that combination key. The briefcase wouldn't be very safe if just anyone could figure out how to open it, right? It needs to be something only Crowley can understand.

This is why Aziraphale is not a private detective in Edinburgh but a journalist because the key is in the hat.

How does one open the locked briefcase?

Press 66. 😉

The briefcase and the hat go together because the briefcase cannot be opened without the press credentials in the hat which, in very Good Omens and Crowley & Aziraphale form, look like they're one thing but are really another when you consider alternate meanings of words. Aziraphale knows that only Crowley would see Aziraphale's hat atop that briefcase and the 'Press 66' and work out that it's how to open the briefcase.

It would also be very Good Omens to nod to famous film Macguffins and then make them actually important in Good Omens' story. While a "what's in the briefcase?" thing here is very Pulp Fiction, the film that inspired the briefcase in Pulp Fiction is 1955's atomic noir Kiss Me Deadly, which is being referenced all over the place in S2.

The scene where Aziraphale picks Shax up from the side of the road is a homage to Kiss Me Deadly's opening scene, Gabriel's memory issues and his "I am in The Fly" note is similar to part of the central mystery of that film, and Kiss Me Deadly is the origin of the popularization of the word vavoom/va-va-voom.

Like basically every other film referenced in Good Omens, it's also known for innovative use when it comes to language-- particularly, coded cinematic language, in this case. Like North by Northwest, which is referenced in both parts of 1941 so far, Kiss Me Deadly found innovative ways to get around the Hays Code to tell its story. References to The Maltese Falcon in the story are also likely in relation to that story using etymology-based language to queer code aspects of its story, in a similar way to Good Omens, but also that The Maltese Falcon itself is a bit of a MacGuffin. In Good Omens, though, it seems like they're actually winking at those by making Macguffin-alluding things actually important parts of the story.

Anyway, the biggest fan theory about what's in the briefcase in Pulp Fiction is based around the combination to the briefcase being 666 in the film and the idea is that it's Marcellus Wallace's soul, which he sold to the devil. Famously, the audience never sees what's inside the briefcase. We might be saying here that the combination to Aziraphale's briefcase being 66 may be nodding to Pulp Fiction's briefcase a bit and hinting at the Satan in The Final 15 ideas. 66 is also tied to Route 66 and rock 'n roll in America, Buddy Holly, and the paralleling Gabriel & Beez flashback, maybe especially hinting at memory-related things happening with the briefcase.

I won't spoil you on what's in the briefcase in Kiss Me Deadly but let's just say that it goes along with Good Omens pretty well thematically... in a much, much darker way. The film being very bleak noir makes it very different in tone from Good Omens but the fact that the briefcase is actually is relevant to the story in the end of that film might also hint that Aziraphale's disappeared briefcase might wind up being important in The Finale, too.

Adding to this theory is also that another briefcase in The Bentley's trunk/boot was also something shown earlier in S2-- on a very significant night in Crowley & Aziraphale's history:

When Aziraphale is in Edinburgh, we see him intentionally hamming up his newspaper man persona and, in doing so, he takes the briefcase into The Resurrectionist Pub, right? Bit of foreshadowing there as to what will happen to Aziraphale and what will need to happen to bring him back?

Yes, we don't see the briefcase again after this scene but I doubt he left it in the pub because it would be useless to Crowley without the hat, on which Aziraphale has hidden the briefcase combination hidden in plain sight. Aziraphale was seen wearing the hat in one scene set after we last saw the briefcase, proving that both of them and the raincoat are in the trunk of The Bentley:

Aziraphale wore this whole get up to Edinburgh so that, if anyone was watching him, they'd think he was Muriel-like cosplaying a newspaper man. I mean... we know the trench coat is a little Columbo-esque, but why wouldn't he just be a private detective and not a journalist, if the goal was just to play a role to help solve the Gabriel mystery? Because he had to be a old movie-esque journalist so he could have the word press there in the credentials, only for its other meaning for the briefcase combination.

Aziraphale definitely had a whole other list of motivations for being the one to go to Edinburgh. He wanted Crowley to rest in the shop and to talk to Gabriel, he wanted to be the one to go tackle the mystery, and he wanted to work on his 1827 issues by going to the graveyard again... but we might find we can add to that list that he also realized it would be a good opportunity to hide his memories in a briefcase in The Bentley with actions that are right there, in plain sight of anyone who is watching-- including us 😉-- but might not be deemed suspicious.

Parallel-wise, the briefcase and The Bentley are the matchbox and the moving box and PRESS 66 is Aziraphale's equivalent to I AM IN THE FLY... all before Aziraphale and Crowley actually figured out what Gabriel and Beez did to protect Gabriel.

He's pressing on the press hat he's leaving for Mr. Six Shots of Espresso... 😂 The press card is in his hat, like a feather... Crowley's "it'd be a real feather in your cap wing" joke from the foreshadowing "I'll be damned"/"It's not so bad when you get used to it" scene in 1.01...

That demon doesn't know it yet but he's driving around with Aziraphale in the trunk because Aziraphale figured out how to get around the worst case scenario. He knew he was on a collision course with falling and he found a way to potentially dodge the memory loss by stashing his memories for Crowley in The Bentley.

His enthusiasm in Edinburgh is him barely able to contain his amusement at getting one over on anyone watching him who think they know what they're seeing but don't realize what he's actually up to.

No wonder why he was walking on air when he got back to London-- it was mission accomplished. He'd managed to leave Crowley the ability to bring him back, tucked away in the safest spot possible.

The bookseller who, like the others, is a metaphorical book/paper, left their out for Heaven and Hell trying to kill him for Crowley's safekeeping in a briefcase... the thing people use for...

...paperwork. 😂

But wait... there's one other big question, though, yes?

Why didn't Aziraphale tell Crowley this?

There absolutely was enough time and opportunity to tell Crowley he'd backed up his memories and left them in The Bentley's trunk.

The fact that this didn't come up seems wild, right, because they both know that Crowley has been having a steady anxiety attack about Heaven and Hell circling all week. We would think that, if Aziraphale had figured out this plan to circumvent that threat, the first thing he would have done would be to tell Crowley about it, yes?

Except... while I wrote this meta from the perspective of what the end result of Aziraphale's actions with the briefcase might be in The Finale, I don't actually think that was Aziraphale's own motivation for doing what he did.

Aziraphale didn't take out his memories and leave them in the briefcase in The Bentley for Crowley as a backup plan for them to elude a form of death for Aziraphale.

He left them there for Crowley to find and have after Aziraphale was already gone. Why else would Crowley need the combination on the credentials on the hat, right?

If Aziraphale had intended on his memories in the briefcase being a plan to save himself, he would have told Crowley about it so that Crowley would know. Instead, though, it's something of a suicide note. He left them for Crowley to find and have in the future.

I think The Bentley was even warning of this suicide ideation and showing concern upon the return to London for Aziraphale over what he had put in its trunk. The car is worried. [I love Good Omens-- when else am I going to type a sentence like that? 😂]

Aziraphale first parked it in front of Battye [madness] & Palm [to take]. It's a shop reflective of a lot of that depression and suicide ideation happening in Aziraphale's story and leading to his fall that I looked at in The Devil Takes The Hindmost.

The Bentley then drives itself-- and all Aziraphale's Aziraphaleness in the briefcase-- up a few feet. What is The Bentley then aligning Aziraphale with?

Death.

The car parked itself in front of the Give Me Death half of Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death...

... until Aziraphale told it to go back to where he parked it. Then, The Bentley backed up a few feet to Battye & Palm and all the madness that is the rest of the season. The car was foreshadowing the end, parking itself right along where it would be parked the last time we'd see it in S2.

The trunk is aligned with Give Me Death in The Final 15...

...fulfilling the foreshadowing of the end of S1.

[rawbutprecious]

'How can you promise that?' she signed. Liz tried to say 'How' but it was barely audible. 'Why are you afraid of that? Is it that middle I told you about? Did I cause you that fear?"

@rawbutprecious asked: ❝ … i guess i’m just scared of losing you. ❞ (Dr. Wilder to Dr. Goodwin)

Meme I can't find | Accepting

Max smiles a bit, shaking his head a bit. "You're not going to lose me. But if I'm being honest.. I'm scared of losing you too."

[rawbutprecious]

"How are you feeling?" Rumple asked, looking up from the paper he was reading. "Did you get good rest? What is the, uh, problem?" He hoped she hadn't gotten drunk. Thoughts of it brought back memories of the past - ones he'd like to leave behind.

@rawbutprecious

Several hours passed before Lacey emerged from her blanket cocoon and headed downstairs. “ Morning “ she muttered, trying to avoid all light.

[rawbutprecious]

Q couldn't help but laugh about that. "Me, make things weird? I only make things weird on days that end in day," he replied. He pretty much made things weird at all times. "Why are you opposed to cuddles? They don't inhibit your ability to captain a ship."

It was an admittedly strange question and she wasn't entirely sure why she even asked it. That wasn't the kind of relationship they had. Still, she had a reputation to maintain. "Don't make this weird."

@rawbutprecious from here

[rawbutprecious]

'Doctor's make the worst patients so don't hurt yourself,' she signed, leaning against the counter. Was she okay? She didn't know. 'i just don't want you to hurt yourself. I want included in your world. What's going on? Why so fast? What's wrong? Is there a fire?' She cocked her head and waited for Max to respond.

Max smiles a bit at her, cheeks flushing in embarrassment as she says he hurts himself with he's not so careful. He rubs the back of his head, looking down before looking back at her. "Sorry." He was all over the place and it was only a matter of time before he did hurt himself if he wasn't careful. Luna tugs on Dr. Wilder's pant leg and holds her arms up. Max moves to pick Luna up so he can keep talking to Elizabeth. "Are you okay?"

[rawbutprecious]

As they waited for Mulder’s arrival, Byers fetched coffee from the cafeteria, Frohike went for snacks at the vending machine, and Langely headed to the Lone Gunmen van to secure the equipment to prevent theft, and Skinner watched the physicians race to stabilize Samantha. Skinner only left the spot to fill out paperwork. As he wrote down what he knew, which frankly wasn’t a lot, he marveled at the surreal nature of the situation.

He shouldn’t be filling this stuff out; it should be Mulder’s job. The Lone Gunmen should not have found her; again, that should have been Mulder’s job. But life is funny like that - stuff doesn’t tend to work like it should.

 Hell, Samantha shouldn’t even be alive. She should be dead. All clues lead to that conclusion. The reporters who looked into her disappearance as well as Fox Mulder’s own investigation kept going to that conclusion. They’d even found a grave. Whose grave was it? Another clone? A random person that happened to have the same name?

Even if the abductors had kept her alive, and this really was Samantha Mulder, her cancer should have killed her. There was no treatment for her type and age back then; it had been a death sentence. But here she was and now Skinner was left wondering if he should even write that down in her history. There was a slim chance this wasn’t Samantha and that bit of information could throw off the whole treatment plan (but so would omitting that data point).  

He opted to leave that point out and would tell the doctors and nurses after confirmation. But Skinner wasn’t going to tell Mulder. Fox didn’t deserve to worry about that just as he reunited with her. Fox didn’t deserve to worry about her with Dana in the hospital dealing with the same type of cancer. Skinner didn’t think Fox could handle it.

 Besides, Skinner wasn’t supposed to even know about that. He only did because he had his own file on Samantha – one he’d almost forgotten about. It had been pushed to the back of a file cabinet and only recently Skinner stumbled upon it while looking for something else. If Fox found out about that secret the news would not go well – at all.

By the time the Lone Gunmen returned from their tasks and Fox Mulder exited the elevator, Skinner turned in the paperwork. He couldn’t help but glance through the glass to see what was going on. It was still chaos. There were frantic beeps and alarms. Things probably weren’t going well, but no one had reported out to them yet so there was no telling.

“We might want to go talk in private,” Byers said instead of actually answering the first question. But with the second, he shook his head. “No, it’s not Scully. It’s part of one of your cases… the one with the swamp gas reports. She’s part of your case. As Langley said, it was not swamp gas…”  Byer’s voice trailed off as Mulder took in the scene behind him. A phlebotomist exited the room where she worked while someone raced in with both an EEG and an EKG.  As Mulder’s voice rose, he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose while he hoped they wouldn’t be kicked out for causing a scene.

Fox Mulder was not thinking about that it seemed. Byers could not blame him. Skinner, though, was on the same wavelength as him. The bald-headed guy grabbed one of Mulder’s arms and did not let go. He kept his steely gaze on the other man. “Do you want to see your sister, Mr. Mulder? You stop now. I will call security and haul your ass out that door in five seconds if you don’t lower your voice. This is a hospital not a rave,” Skinner growled, pushing Mulder away from the window and forcing him to sit down in a chair. “Yes, that might be your sister. She’s not a clone and I’m getting it, but you have to stay put. No more yelling.”

“There was blood,” Frohike said after taking a sip of his coffee. “We found her, well, she found us, while we were looking for the nonexistent swamp gas. A UFO showed up, dropped her off, she toddled over to us, and she passed out. I called 911 while Byers called Skinner and Langley called you. She wasn’t doing all that great. Really cold. Wearing a light blue dress and an engraved locket but nothing else. No shoes or coat. I wrapped her in my coat. Langley filmed it all.”

While Frohike filled Mulder in, he got the file – saying that the woman was part of their investigation and they needed to make a copy for the evidence files. He flipped through and noted that there was a sheet of the pending blood work as well as an initial report from the EKG and EEG (both had quite irregular readings, but that was part of hypothermia). There was also notes of her having a potential concussion and various scars (including a unique star-shaped one on her arm). “Here you go,” Skinner said, offering it to Mulder to read.

A man with a mission. One that was slowly dying by what he was beginning to believe was the consequences of his own actions. Failure is becoming a more frequent occurrence than ever before. Failing Samantha, and now Scully.

Though despite the negativity that festered deep within Mulder, he had enough of that ‘Mulder genetic muster’ to power through the negativity that was wanting to consume him like a disease, and become determined to find a cure for Scully no matter the cost it came at. He couldn’t lose Scully.

You’ve expected Mulder to have his phone on dial at all times. Waiting to hear back from a range of topics whether it is a call from Scully or her mother, or the likes of Langley, Frohike, Byers about any information they could get their hands on in regards to Scully cancer. Rather Mulder been out following a lead of his own after checking through the countless X-Files.

It wasn’t till he got home to his apartment. Pushing the button on the answering machine, as he stripped off his blazer in total exhaustion draping it lazily on his ‘couch’ as it acted more as a bed than his bed in his room which he couldn’t remember the last time sleeping on it.

A hand lazily ran across his face as his slumped into his couch leaning his head back, as his eyes fluttered shut listening

the messages. The first couple hadn’t caught his attention, it was the usual ‘nut jobs’ he contacted about articles he found in local papers about ‘paranormal’ or ‘extraterrestrial experiences’.

Though what shot him to quickly open his weary blue eyes, and stand up from his comfortable spot on the couch with haste steps over to the answering machine. Hearing the multitude of messages left by Langley hearing the scolding voice of Beyer’s in the background. The message of it was an emergency, and to meet them at the local hospital.

Which instigated a quick response from Mulder disregarding the blazer her once wore, and quickly grabbed his keys rushing himself out to his car.

His mind first reaction was the worse for Scully. Considering she was in the very same hospital, which he had intended to go to later in the evening after getting some ‘shut eye’ which would be roughly about ten minutes before he would scatterbrain trying to find solutions than the one that really weighed on his conscious of working with the enemy…Cigarette man.

As he entered the elevator, his foot tapped a bit impatiently, and when the doors opened he was shocked to see not only the ‘three musketeers’ , but skinner. Which made his stomach churn. “What the hell is goin on here?” Mulder called out, as the worry lines were as prominent as ever between his eyebrows. “Is it Scully?” He asked almost as a first instinct, but it was the glimpse he caught through the glass that blocked off the emergency room. “Who is that?” His voice started out soft, as his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

It was this gut feeling that became almost all knowing. He didn’t need more than a quick glimpse to know. “Who is that?” His voice raised as he watched the nurse within the room move to curtain to give privacy.

His breathing picked up as he tried to force his way over to the glass sliding door to enter the room. “God damn it tell me, skinner!” His voice raised which caused the other medical professional in the emergency room to glance over. As Skinner held Mulder back by his hands pressing into his shoulders to keep him away.

With Mulder intuition, and the look in Skinner’s eyes which he tried to conceal but failed at doing. He began to shake his head side to side in a small fit of denial. “It can’t be.” His lips quivered slightly in a shaky breath, he’d seen enough Samantha’s claiming to be his sister, but even if this was in fact one of those women ... .It still aches that piece of him.

In the classic Mulder fashion, he pressed the palms of his hands into Skinner's shoulders pushing him away, before Mulder turned to the nurses desk. “I need the file on the woman in there.” His pointer finger gestured to the room. “I need the file for the woman in that room!” He raised his voice a bit more erratically.

@rawbutprecious

[rawbutprecious]

@ricketybcnts / @ricketyhearts

I can't love anyone else, Jo. I only love you... I love you, Jo.

Josephine "Jo" March & Theodore "Laurie" Laurence LITTLE WOMEN│2019

[rawbutprecious]

Young Heretics : We Are The Lost Loves album … sentence starters

“In the dark, I’ve grown.”

“I’ve deceived the lonely.”

“How could they know you?”

“You never seem surprised.”

“We are not too young to die.”

“Take your lonely hands off me.”

“This house has seen better days.”

“We fall, we hide. It’s all we ever had.”

“I was only a child. It makes no sense.”

“We can’t go back. We’ve come too far.”

“We know that you want to break down.”

“They know that you’re losing your edge.”

“Don’t pretend you’ve learned to breathe.”

“It’s cold out there, so why not stay here?”

“You can hardly tell there ever was a fight.”

“This blood on my teeth it is far beyond dry.”

“Light a torch and take your place at my side.”

“So, I’m telling you that you’ll be safe with me.”

“Did they build you so you weren’t built to last?”

“Well, you got your aim, but it’s all the same game.”

“What happened to all the love that got left behind?”

“Dear rabbit, my legs are getting weak chasing you.”

“I wish I could give you something worth fighting for.”

“I need more than a body to keep me warm at night.”

“And I’ve captured you once, but I wasn’t quite right.”

“Who knows if we will be coming back… Who knows?”

“Oh, rabbit, my claws are dull, now, so don’t be afraid.”

“You have conquered cities and torched the mighty sea.”

“We need to come together more than ever, sweetheart.”

“Sometimes I forget the best of me, and winter gets inside.”

“You may keep yourself afloat, but you cannot outswim me.“

“I need more than a vampire with blood and lust in his eyes.”

“I could keep you warm as long as you can just try to be brave.”

“This life has seen better days. And this luck has seen better days.”

“You know that these people aren’t friends, and they only have your worst interests at heart.”

“Yes, I know I’m a wolf and I’ve been known to bite, but the rest of my pack, I have left them behind.”

“And my teeth may be sharp and I’ve been raised to kill, but the thought of fresh meat, it is making me ill.”

[rawbutprecious]

Alive did not really want to be touched. He did not care one way or the other. His body just felt so heavy that he couldn't raise his head. As he rested against House's knees and sobs - it was a quite one that produced many tears.

The next two works House spoke to him, made him look up. His eyes flashed with anger. "This is not good news," he snapped, but that annoyance turned to laugher at the joke. "I figured you'd be more of a Steel Magnolias fan, but.... but I don't know if I'm tragic as The Notebook."

As House tried to console him, be raised his eyebrows. His dark eyes flashed at the whining part. "I think if anyone deserves to whine right now it's me," he replied. "And you... you don't know me! For the first time since I can remember I wanted to live. They took away the only thing that helped me stay grounded. So how do you know I won't? I...I've done it more than you know. How am I going to stop myself when things get really dark and oppressive."

House doesn't respond immediately, letting Alvie's words hang in the silence, punctuated only by the muffled sound of tears hitting denim. His cane shifts in his grip, tapping the floor softly as if testing the waters for his next move. 

"Good news, though."

He finally speaks, his voice dry, cutting through the emotional haze. 

"You've officially made it to the top of the 'world's saddest sob story' charts. It's neck and neck with The Notebook, but I think you've got the edge."

He knows it's cruel and that the timing is terrible, but House isn't exactly known for his tact. If he softens now and offers Alvie what he truly needs—a friend that will comfort him and tell him everything is going to be okay—he risks something far more dangerous: being human. And right now, he can't afford that. 

So, instead, he leans forward slightly, lowering his voice an octave to make it sharper and quieter.

"You're not going to do anything to yourself, Alvie. You didn't come this far just to give up now. I don't care if they took your meds, your paycheck, or your dignity—trust me, those are just party favors at rock bottom. But you're still here. Still breathing, still whining to me of all people. That means you're not done yet."

[rawbutprecious]

Writing Angry Scenes: Tips to Avoid Melodrama and Make It Real

Anger can be one of the most intense, relatable emotions to read—and one of the trickiest to write. When handled well, an angry scene can pull readers deep into the emotional world of a character, building tension and driving the story forward. But when handled poorly, anger can easily slip into melodrama, making the character’s feelings seem overblown, forced, or even cringe-worthy.

So how can you avoid these pitfalls and write anger that feels real and compelling? Here are some tips to make angry scenes powerful without overdoing it.

1. Understand What Fuels Your Character’s Anger

To write anger authentically, you need to understand its roots. People get angry for complex reasons—fear, frustration, betrayal, grief, and even love. Ask yourself what’s truly driving your character’s anger. Are they afraid of losing control? Do they feel abandoned or misunderstood? Are they hurt by someone they trusted? Anger rarely exists in isolation, so dig into the deeper emotions fueling it.

When you understand the core reasons behind a character’s anger, you can weave those nuances into the scene, making the anger more relatable and layered. Readers will feel the depth of the character's rage, not just the surface heat of it.

2. Show, Don’t Tell—But Don’t Overdo It

“Show, don’t tell” is classic writing advice, but it’s especially crucial in angry scenes. Don’t rely on generic phrases like “She was furious” or “He clenched his fists in anger.” Instead, look for unique ways to convey how this specific character experiences anger. Maybe their voice drops to a deadly calm, or their eyes narrow in a way that makes everyone around them uncomfortable.

That said, showing too much can backfire, especially with exaggerated descriptions. Over-the-top body language, excessive shouting, or too many “flaring nostrils” can tip the scene into melodrama. Use body language and physical cues sparingly and mix them with subtler reactions for a more realistic portrayal.

3. Use Dialogue to Reveal Hidden Layers

People rarely say exactly what they feel, especially when they’re angry. Angry dialogue isn’t just about yelling or throwing out insults; it’s an opportunity to show the character’s deeper thoughts and vulnerabilities.

Consider using controlled, icy responses or unexpected silences. Maybe your character says something hurtful in a low voice rather than screaming. They might express sarcasm, avoidance, or even laugh at the wrong moment. Anger often carries hidden layers, and using these nuances can help your character’s dialogue feel genuine, even haunting, without falling into dramatic clichés.

4. Control the Pacing of the Scene

The pacing of an angry scene can be the difference between a powerful moment and a melodramatic one. In real life, anger doesn’t always erupt instantly; it can simmer, spike, or deflate depending on the situation and the character’s personality. Experiment with different pacing techniques to create tension.

You might build the anger slowly, with small signs that something’s brewing. Or maybe the character explodes suddenly, only to calm down just as quickly, leaving a chill in the air. Controlling the pace helps you control the reader’s emotional engagement, drawing them in without overwhelming them.

5. Avoid Clichéd Expressions and Overused Reactions

When writing anger, avoid falling back on clichés like “seeing red,” “boiling with rage,” or “blood boiling.” These phrases have been overused to the point that they lose their impact. Instead, get creative and think about how your character’s anger might feel specifically to them.

Maybe their skin feels prickly, or their jaw aches from clenching it. Think about details that are unique to the character and to the moment. By focusing on small, unique sensory details, you’ll help readers feel the anger rather than just reading about it.

6. Let the Setting Reflect the Emotion

The setting can be an effective tool to amplify a character’s anger without overstating it. Small details in the environment—such as the hum of a refrigerator, the slow ticking of a clock, or the distant sounds of laughter—can create a sense of contrast or isolation that heightens the character’s rage.

For example, imagine a character seething in a peaceful park or a quiet library. The calm of the surroundings can make their anger feel more potent. Or maybe they’re in a crowded, noisy room where they feel unseen and unheard, which fuels their frustration further. This use of setting can add depth to the scene without the need for dramatic gestures.

7. Let Consequences Speak for Themselves

An effective way to avoid melodrama is to let the consequences of the anger show its intensity. Characters don’t always have to yell or physically react; sometimes, a single choice can convey more than any outburst.

Perhaps your character cuts off a close friend or says something they can’t take back. Maybe they throw away a meaningful object or walk out in silence. By focusing on the consequences of their anger, you can reveal the impact without over-explaining it.

8. Let the Emotion Simmer After the Scene Ends

Anger is rarely resolved in a single moment, and its effects often linger. When writing an angry scene, think about how it will affect your character moving forward. Are they holding onto grudges? Do they feel guilty or exhausted afterward? Does their anger transform into something else, like sadness or regret?

Allowing the anger to simmer in your character’s mind even after the scene ends creates a more authentic and layered portrayal. It shows that anger is complex and doesn’t just disappear the moment the scene is over, adding emotional weight to both the character and the story.

[rawbutprecious]

"How can you be so sure of that? These people aren't nice."

"Oh don't worry, whatever's chasing after you won't be any trouble to me."

[rawbutprecious]

Lost and Found

“That sure as hell isn’t swamp gas,” Langley growled, peering through his binoculars as he stared across the frozen clearing coated in a thin film of snow. “We’re not even near a swamp.” He pulled the binoculars away from his face and listened as Beyers typed up the report.

“I hope Mulder’s thankful for this,” Frohike muttered under his breath. “I can’t feel my feet or my…” Frohike stopped speaking when Beyers raised a hand up. Frohike was about to ask what was up when he found out the reason.

“Shit…” Langley whispered, eyes widening. He kept whispering the word over and over while the UFO lowered itself. The ground rolled and grumbled with the energy. It felt like they were having an earthquake. “Film this, Beyers.”

“I am,” he whispered, the camera was already up and recording the whole thing. Usually the ever steady person, Beyers almost dropped his camera as the UFO paused and hovered. The base of the UFO opened and someone was released.

The person laid in a heap. Before the Lone Gunmen could move, she shakily sat up. Steps unsteady, she moved towards the three men. She was paler than any person they’d ever seen. She was walking much like a toddler. Her gait was unsteady and her hands were away from her sides and fingers outstretched. She wore a thin pale blue dress and a locket, but that was it (no shoes, socks, or even coat). Eyes wide and mouth agape, she moved towards three men. Puffs of panicked breaths escape her lips.

When she was about five feet away from them, she stopped. Shivering from the cold and wavering on the spot, the woman crumbled to the ground. As she approached, Beyers was calling 911 while Frohike ran to check on her. He whipped off his coat and draped her with the fabric to try and offer a little bit of warmth. He pressed two fingers to her neck – there was a thready, faint pulse, but it was hard to feel under her shivering. After the check, his hands went to the locket. It was engraved SM.

The other two were over. Langley dialed Mulder’s number even with Beyer’s protest. He tried it 20 times and left a frantic message each time. Beyers were calling Skinner – something told him that was a better call. Frohike just kept looking from the woman to the nearby road as they waited for an ambulance.

It was the longest 15 minutes, but the ambulance arrived. After she was loaded up, the Lone Gunmen gather their equipment and after the van was loaded, they follow the ambulance to the hospital. She was just being removed from the ambulance and rolled into the ER. They kept their distance so that the physicians could work. While they stabilized her, Skinner charged through the ER entrance just as the closest elevator dinged and opened to reveal Fox Mulder.

“Uhh… We got your footage. It’s not swamp gas. It’s a UFO,” Langley blurted in the attempt to lighten the mood. It probably did not work.

@devotedwrites

[rawbutprecious]

I started an X-Files roleplay. You can check it out here. It's season 4 based with a twist that Samantha Mulder is alive. Care to join?

[rawbutprecious]

*dusts off*

I am so sorry for poofing. Life has thrown me for a loop - including getting a yew puppy in November. But, with the new year I am here and I'm ready to plot, post, and play. :D Please send me asks and random starters. Also, feel free to send me private messages - I'd love to plot and chat.

[rawbutprecious]

"Is it time for the Mayfield class reunion already?" Alvie quipped into House's knees. Even though he tried to joke, the words lacked their usual punch. They were flat and emotionless as a sheet of printer paper. "Time sure flies, huh?"

He lifted his head to look at House. His busted lip quivered. His eyes were red from crying. "Contrary to what I look like, I've been doing good. Been taking my meds and goin' to therapy. I... I had a job, House, that paid, and I was good at it. It was in construction. I painted, put up drywall, whatever needed done of the job."

He bowed his head as tears came faster and harder until actual droplets fell from his eyes. "I even made friends or I...I thought I did. I picked up my meds and, um, they beat me up. They took my meds, all of them, and left," he continued. "I set down the cops already and was checked out by.... lots of docs and they all tried to get me replacement stuff. They can't. There's none left anywhere and won't be for over a week. I... I don't know what i'm gonna do... to myself... and I was trying so hard. It's all gone. All the work... for nothing."

It all happens too fast for House to register, and Alvie is on the floor before he can react, rubbing against him like an old dog. Which isn’t unlike him, but House has to suppress the impulse to push him away with a jerk of his knee.

He’ll let him have this one, at least for now, but he’s not going to pat his head or call him a good boy.

"Old man’s back in town…"

House trails off as he curiously looks over Alvie, noticing the fresh wounds on his cheeks.

"What happened to you?"

[rawbutprecious]

little women from the 2019 film. alter as needed.

not a first attempt, i take it?

people want to be amused, not preached at.

you're on fire.

money is the end and aim of my mercenary existence.

it's up to me to keep the family afloat.

don't humor me, girl.

i looked for you and couldn't find you anywhere!

you've become so beautiful.

come back here right this instant!

i'll wear my best silk.

that would look so lovely on you.

i can't dance.

i like your nose.

you could be pretty if you tried.

i ruin everything!

don't stare.

oh, that’s capital!

i can't get over my disappointment in being a girl.

you can laugh if you want to. it's funny, i know.

i've hurt my ankle.

you'll kill yourself for fashion one of these days.

i enjoy baking in the middle of the night.

don't mind the clutter.

can i call you [name]?

here, have a scone.

i wanted you to have this.

do you want to know what i honestly think of you? i despise you.

with every chance for being good, useful and happy, you are faulty, lazy and miserable.

selfish people do like to talk about themselves.

i'll be good for you, saint [name], i'll be good!

i feel sorry for you, i really do.

i'd be respected if i couldn't be loved.

i'm working on a novel.

i think you're talented, which is why i'm being so blunt.

i can’t afford to starve on praise.

and who made you high priest?

your reaction indicates that you must think there is some truth in it.

you are a pompous blowhard.

i'm no shakespeare.

no one will forget [sender's name].

we are not friends, you are not my friend.

it's so dreadful to be poor.

why be ashamed of what you want?

you must not limit yourself.

i detest rudy, unladylike girls.

i could eat a horse.

boys scare me.

why are you just sitting there?

i wish it was christmas every day.

i like good strong words that mean something.

one day you'll need me and you'll wish you had behaved better.

i intend to make my own way in the world.

it is possible to be right and foolish.

you're not paid to think.

i have lovely small feet. best in my family.

i can never go home again because i’m in such trouble.

i want this painting purchased immediately.

you ought to be the happiest boy in the world!

what happened, little lamb?

we do not compare grandfathers.

you're a good teacher.

you did wrong, and there will be consequences.

i think we should do it, even if we are afraid.

there is no time like the present.

it's so good to have you home.

don't be a baby and whine about it.

i think you'd hate to poke yourself in where you're not wanted.

i'll never forgive you as long as i live!

don't let the sun go down on your anger.

stay near the edge, it's not safe in the middle.

when i get in a passion i get so savage, i could hurt anyone and enjoy it.

you remind me of myself.

i'm angry nearly every day of my life.

i'm not patient by nature, but with nearly [age] years of effort i have learned to not let it get the better of me.

there are some natures too noble to curb, too lofty to bend.

pretty things should be enjoyed.

girls have to go into the world and make up their own minds about things.

have fun, little daisy.

it was supposed to be a surprise.

you'll have a terrible headache tomorrow.

i don't like fuss and feathers.

you are the rudest boy i ever saw.

my dear, kind, hardworking boy.

i really am very sorry that you have had to do without so many beautiful things.

you can't be too hard on me.

that's quite a statement to make at [age].

i've always known that i would marry rich.

i think the poets might disagree.

i know something you don't know.

i thought you'd be pleased.

i don't think i can anymore.

i'm very sick and you must do what i say.

i am so proud that you are my sister.

i love you more than words can say.

short answers save trouble.

i might as well stay and plague you a little longer.

that's a waste of time.

you remind me so much of my little girl.

go back and make something of yourself.

don't worry, sweet girl.

i should have given it to you long ago.

my foot is stuck! i can't get it out!

my child, you're burning.

it's for your own good, child.

it's like the tide going out. it goes out slowly, but it can't be stopped.

it must be the italian in him.

i don't want you to be unhappy.

don't go quietly, fight!

thank god you're home. now i can be angry with you in person.

we can leave. we can leave right now.

i can make a life for us. let's run away together.

just because my dreams are not the same as yours doesn't mean they're unimportant.

i just hate that you're leaving me.

i may not always be right, but i am never wrong.

i've loved you ever since i've known you.

i can't go on like this any longer.

i can't love you as you want me to.

i'm homely and awkward and odd.

i love my liberty too well to be in any hurry to give it up.

i ruined our friendship with my temper.

i'm sick of being told that love is all a woman is fit for—but i am so lonely.

you don't have to say anything, we never need to talk about it.

the house doesn’t seem right.

i was young and stupid.

the worst fate is to live my life without you in it.

"glad to see you," my blessed boy, is too small!

it all happened very fast.

no one ever calls me that but you.

can we still be friends?

of course, my boy, always.

life is too short to be angry at one's sisters.

i'll be a friend to lean on, if you'll let me.

writing doesn't confer importance, it reflects it.

you were just too busy noticing my faults.

i don't want to be a burden.

i have never see you happier.

come with me, i need to fix you up.

i would never leave if you wished me to stay.

[rawbutprecious]

On the road to Season 3 - Day 289

Probably his worst nightmare... being too late to save his angel...

Master post : here