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[raqfrench]

Not Doing Life Right

“I’m not doing life right,” I say as I wake up in a warm bed, with a roof over my head, in a house with running water and electricity. All because I saw some woman on Instagram post her 5-bedroom luxury apartment with all the extra appliances you could dream of. “I’m not doing life right,” I say as I try to choose what to wear from a mountain of clothes, as I pick the perfect earrings for today…

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A Little Crush(ed)

I got a little crush. This is about to be very embarrassing.  It was bad. We’re talking sweaty-palms-before-saying-hello kinda crush. Losing-train-of-thought-after-he-greets-me kinda crush. Taking-up-all-my-brain-space kinda crush. I felt goofy and giggly. I was over-analysing every interaction (what does it take for him to like my stories? Is it okay to greet him when he’s with his friends?…

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Thank God for Prayer

Thank God for prayer. I don’t think we truly reflect enough on how awesome it is that we can pray. That we have direct communication with the Being who made us. Not just us, but every blade of grass, every tree, every star, every animal, every planet. God, who is so powerful, gave us a tool to talk with the full knowledge that God is listening.  Thank God that God will just listen.Listen to me…

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Access to Womanhood: Disrupting the Gender Binary

I am in a privileged position to access womanhood: I am White, have typically feminine features, and am thin. Of course, this conception of womanhood is based on a Western view, but it is a conception of womanhood that has permeated many of our cultures worldwide or, at the very least, has permeated the cultures I consume in my physical and online communities. Why even consider this idea? The…

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The Boys aren't Okay

I’ve just finished listening to the audiobook of The Nurse, whose main male character is an incel. I’ve stumbled across this idea of incel before but never to so much depth and I’ve never had to think about them in the way that Claire Allan, the author, forced me to think about them. The term incel means involuntary celibate. It’s a term used often in the same breath as men’s rights, so you can…

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Girlhood

“Oh, you know, girlhood.” “It’s a girl thing, you won’t get”. This is what I tell all the men in my life whenever something vaguely resembling femininity is bought up. Maybe it’s because I’m reclaiming all the things I was embarrassed about, made to feel embarrassed about when I was little. Loving purple. Wanting to be a princess. Being obsessed with sparkles. Playing with dolls. Listening…

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It's All in My Head

I can’t sit too long with my knee bent. I don’t sleep on my left side. I avoid standing for extended periods. I hope people don’t squeeze too hard when they hug me. Because I know that if I do, things will get sore and stiff and it won’t be a fun time.  In May 2019, I dislocated my knee for the first time while playing netball. I then sub-located twice more and eventually had surgery in May…

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Ecstasy in Existence

It’s the quiet knowing deep within your being that everything will be okay. That today was a bad day, and maybe the next day or week or month or year will be a write-off. But you’ll hit rock bottom at some point and the only way to go will be up. That no moment is permanent. That this too shall pass. It’s watching a grandmother’s face light up when her grandchildren arrive at Mass. The change…

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Dear Little Me

Dear Little Me, The world is big and scary. You’ve got a lot to learn. But it’s going to be fun and frightening and everything in between. So take some advice from an older (but not much wiser) you. Actively look for the things that bring you joy. Create a gallery of happiness. Reread your favourite passages. Hang out with people who make you laugh. Save the posts that made you smile. Watch the…

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Taylor Swift: Performative Feminsit?

Taylor Swift: Performative Feminsit?

Now I won’t say I’m a Swiftie, but I have listened to many Taylor Swift songs. It’s impossible to be a hard-core bubblegum pop fan without hearing a Swift song. And eventually, as I listened to more of her songs, branching into her more country songs and learning the words of her choruses, I started to realise something. It seemed as if Swift had never collab’ed with a woman. I thought to myself…

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Fall in Love

Fall in Love

Dear world, Fall in love with yourself.  Fall in love with the way you laugh. Can you picture it? Can you hear it, bubbling out and surrounding you? Fall in love with the way your checks hurt so much. Fall in love with the gasps of breaths. Fall in love with the snorts, the wheezes, and the chortles.  Fall in love with the silent laughing until you’re as red as a strawberry. Fall in love with…

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God’s Great Plans

God’s Great Plans

I’m sitting between my friends near the middle of the hall. My palms are sweating. There’s butterflies in my stomach, trying out for the Olympic Gymnastics team. I’ve whispered prayers, and hoped, and wished on stray eyelashes. I’ve told everyone who’s asked me this is what I want. You can feel the underlying buzz in the hall, a cocktail of nervousness and excitement. After greetings, speeches…

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Let's Get Out of Here

Let’s Get Out of Here

I’ve always been able to see dragons. My dragon is sitting by my feet right now. It’s a luminous pink, and its gentle purring is resounding through my bones, echoing to the beat of my heart. Most people’s dragons float around their heads. Some like to blow little balls of fire at falling leaves. My favourite type of dragon is the one that is so small it can curl up in your hand. Mine likes to…

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The piece is inspired by @shityoushouldcareabout’s post about being a "stan" and the hate you can receive.  I talk about my experiences of being a complete nerd.

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A short essay on giraffes ... and the male body image.