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My experience reading No Longer Human or 人間失格 by Osamu Dazai

Descriptive essay

This is my experience reading No Longer Human or 人間失格 by Osamu Dazai. At the point of writing this paragraph I have not finished it, but I would like to reflect on what I have read of his  autobiography and the feelings I have about it.  

When I started it I thought it was interesting to see how the main character Yozo thinks and how he acts. I found it interesting how he interacts with his friends and family. For example, he calls it clowning, acting silly, and creating a constant smile on his face. In fact he says “My true nature however was one diametrically opposed to the role of a mischievous imp.” Over time the story gets more disturbing and it might be hard to read what is happening. Through most of the first chapters of the story Yozo has an innocent smile and when I read it makes me feel uncomfortable.This discomfort comes from seeing, as he puts it, “cruelest crime”.  It leaves a feeling of disgust and horror. Even though these horrible things happen he keeps his innocent smile, as he puts it  “I smile in my weakness”.  When we see him go to school he meets a classmate and I found his reaction to being called out about his acting rather weird. He was scared and compared it to “the raging flames of hell.” Then a little later we see his classmate, who was the one who called him out on his clowning, kill himself after being rejected by one of Yozo's relatives. We see that this will haunt Yozo though his life.He is constantly being reminded of what he thinks he did.”Takeichi’s ghost appeared any number of times after that”. “He continued to torment me”.  It makes me feel so unsettled that he is responsible for multiple deaths, however, I push onward through the story as I am curious to discover what else may happen.  

Yozo's father makes a decision to have his son  relocate to the modern city of Tokyo to attend  Art School.  Before that decision was made ,his father had insisted that he take the college exams early.  Since he passed this exam he was able to skip his last year of high school and go directly on to college.  We see how he doesn't like the big city as he said “when I walked down the roads, I felt as though each and every person I passed was staring at me in rebuke.” Thismove caused him turmoil and he was terrified. In class he meets a man named Masao Horiki and they appear to be friendly with each other.in truth Yozo doesn't like him. Their new friendship does cause some issues to arise.Yozo loses his innocent smile and gets into drinking, smoking and other risky behavior. We can see It seems to have had an effect on him as he loses that clowning personality. He drops down into his dark personality and becomes very removed.  This change causes him to be less child-like and more adult, when this happens we see his sunken eyes, a fog or smoke follows him, and he is sometimes in silhouette. His inability to make personal connections with others is even more amplified when he lives in his dark space. Yozo joins underground communist meetings. He finds them narrow minded and laughable and he doesn't understand why they care so much for something. The communist supporters are actually seen as insects with big jagged eyes and ropy, twisted antennae like a wasp. He keeps going to the meetings despite the fact that he thinks. Politics are pointless.  

Breaking the law is important to communist group, and him too, as he 

likes to break the law. 

I am looking forward to finishing this read and to finding out how this story develops. I'm curious to find out what else may happen in his life.

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Me and some friends playing with Ai and we made a better call saul manga

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Louis wain has cute cat art at first, but it just gets weird and disturbing to see his struggle with mental illness in his art.

Louis Wain (English,1860-1939)

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thinking about creampuffs o-o

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I want to talk about mash because it is one of the funniest things I have read. The main character mash lives in a world of magic like Harry Potter but people are killed in this world if they can't use magic. I love how over top the fights can be or how strong it shows mash to see some of the reactions are so funny. And I like later in the story his friends are not shocked on what he can do.

I love this kind of humor in stuff like one punch man and saiki.

It is something you don't see in American media. That is a reason

why I love media from other countries it feels different and refreshing. The art of the story can be a little simple at times but I think it works. It is very cartoony with some sense