pray-harder

[pray-harder]

You guys want to play a game? REBLOG and put in the tags why you follow this person

[pray-harder]

it is not a lot for you to ask to be loved.

and it’s not even a lot for you to ask to FEEL loved.

in fact, you deserve to be loved.

to FEEL loved.

you do not deserve to feel outcasted, or abandoned, or alone.

especially not from the god who created you, promises to love you and know you through and through.

it’s not that you or your faith are weak.

do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

[pray-harder]

Letter to Abraham

Dear Abraham,

I wouldn’t have done it,

And that’s all I’m going to say.

I would have screamed

I would have rebelled

I would have chased God away throwing stones at his back

I would never have even thought of hurting my child

I wouldn’t have done it,

And that’s all I’m going to say.

Do you know how many parents have followed your lead?

Setting their gay children,

Their trans children,

Their beautiful innocent children

Down on an altar because you, monster, did it first?

I wouldn’t have done it,

And that’s all I’m going to say.

Why couldn’t you see what an evil it was?

Don’t you know what a parent is for? To love, to protect?

I’d have stood between God and my child like a lioness protecting my lamb from slaughter,

I’d have roared at him for daring even to ask,

I would never have relied on the mercy of an evil thing that demanded child-blood spilt in its honor

I wouldn’t have done it,

And that’s all I’m going to say.

[pray-harder]

Reminder:

No one who loves you will tell you, "Either you love me, or die!".

Much less, "Either you obey me, or I'm taking you into the basement and setting you on fire for all eternity!"

No one who loves you tells you, "You're so horrifically evil, you should feel lucky to have me!", or, "No one else will ever love you the way I do!", or, "You are WORTHLESS without me!"

Those are the actions and sayings of stalkers. It is CLASSIC abuser speech.

Yet, this is what the christian god is depicted as telling his worshippers.

And we're consistently told that this is 'perfect', 'loving', even 'divine' behavior that his followers should mimic in their own interpersonal relationships.

Pure nonsense!

[pray-harder]

do ppl actually think goths are ignorant about whatever religious symbols they’re wearing/using? bitch i KNOW this is a st. peter’s cross. i KNOW i’m not supposed to wear rosaries like they’re necklaces. what was ur point? now what? wanna get a coffee or something. wanna hold hands. are we about to kiss rn

[pray-harder]

yeah still can’t believe the church tried to gaslight us into thinking the only acceptable way to have sex was in fact the least natural way to do it.

- married

- between a man and a woman

- who are able to have children

… and ANYTHING ELSE is a sin????

i have no idea what the percentage of the world that those 3 constraints just wiped out is. but i know it’s a LARGE one. and that’s pretty contradictory for a church that claims to be “universal.”

[pray-harder]

witchy confession:

I have never understood or kept track of astrology even a little bit. What moon phase is it? I have no fucking idea dude. What’s the best time of the month to do that spell? Right now. Mercury in gatorade? I hope he feels better soon i guess.

[pray-harder]

*googles how 2 wear a sundress not in a cute straight christian girl way, but rather in a slut-trying-to-seem-innocent-and-failing-horribly way*

[pray-harder]

"but christianity is still so beautiful for so many people!! and you can still find SOME beauty in it, right?"

if you don't want to scrounge around searching for that positivity, you do not have to.

if your energy right now is being taken up by processing negativity, that's completely normal and okay. there is no reason why you should be required to "look on the bright side" on top of it all.

right now, you will not miss out on any healing by refusing to look at the bigger picture.

this step of "seeing the beauty" in christianity may eventually happen- but it comes from acceptance, not from gritting your teeth. and acceptance comes from healing.

you don't have to do shit to appease the christians in your lives or make them more comfortable. they aren't the victims here.

remember to take your time, and be patient with yourself <3

[pray-harder]

[pray-harder]

welcome to pray harder :3c

i hope u enjoy ur visit! this blog is all about deconstructing catholicism and there may be a little bit of gayass poetry and witchcraft thrown in every once and a while.

those seeking to convert people to their religion, evangelize, or spread the gospel should look elsewhere. there is nothing for you here.

i try to make this place as comfy as possible for my fellows in the deconstruction process while still addressing this uh. highly traumatic experience that is the catholic religion. i’ll avoid a lot of super triggering subjects, and focus mostly on self love here.

this is NOT a venting blog. i want this to be uplifting, optimistic, and truth-unearthing. i’ll only share my own experiences in a very generalized manner here in hopes that i can reach out to someone else who may relate too.

while this blog focuses mostly on catholicism since i myself was raised catholic, other ex christians, ex muslims, and every deconstructing member of an institutional religion is always welcome here. there are a LOT of excaths on this website but yalls experiences, trauma, and journeys are just as valid as mine and everyone else’s, and this is a space where i want u guys to feel seen and heard just like everyone else as such!!

my asks are open!! be sweet <3

[pray-harder]

catholics bothering u about being a witch? call the mass a cannibalistic ritual to their faces and watch as the smoke comes out of their ears

[pray-harder]

i love this so so much, and i’m quite new to tumblr so i’m very sorry if this doesn’t follow the correct etiquette- i just wanted to add that, growing up, every catholic adult surrounding me would insist that a life without god would be bleak, and sad, and boring, and meaningless. and this was a major thing preventing me from deconstruction a while back. i was afraid that i’d be lost without a god telling me what to do, where to go, and how to live my life.

but now that i’m out, i see that the world’s beauty is inherent. nature, and earth, and the entire universe itself rings with harmony and majesty for no reason other than- like you phrased so perfectly- it “fundamentally belongs to itself.”

and even further! i see now too that the goodness we have inside us is an exercised and active choice we make (not a seed planted by some omnipresent being), and human goodness exists because we all share in keeping it alive (not because we fear eternal damnation). just for the sake of being good to each other! which is so much more meaningful and beautiful than any christian story i’ve ever heard.

atheists, agnostics, and otherwise deconstructed people are some of the happiest ive ever met. we’ve found our truths and we’re living them out. life is so much more beautiful, fulfilling, and meaningful when you live it for yourself. when you’re free.

Life gets so much lighter when you are just allowed to exist. When there's no god in your head listening in on everything you think. When the trees outside are not a sign of anybody's presence, but just beautiful. I think the world, fundamentally, belongs to itself. And we are a part of it. That's all.

[pray-harder]

hey girlie!! remember suffering for the lord to grow closer to him in prayer? remember how intimate the pain became for you? a way to distract yourself from the stressors of daily life, just focus on your bruised knees and how much god loves you, right?

yeah crazy. anyways, hows the sadomasochism going?

[pray-harder]

if God write the Bible through humans, but by His law humans are inherently flawed and sinful….wouldnt that make the Bible also flawed???

[pray-harder]

hey. you have a right to privacy, yknow.

you don’t need to tell people every bad thing about yourself, lay it all out on a table for them to see, leaving yourself vulnerable and in a position to be scorned and judged.

you can just let others draw their own conclusions about you. that’s not misleading. that’s not dishonesty.

you can keep secrets.

and if people ask personal questions about you? you can say, “that’s none of your business.”

you can say, “that’s private.”

you can say, “i’m not comfortable with giving that information to you.”

you can say, “no.”

and you can say it to God.

he won’t know shit about you if you don’t let him.

“omniscient” “omnipotent” my ASS

[pray-harder]

the seven deadly sins are such bullshit fear tactics. if youve left the church, embrace them.

be proud of who you are. be happy when you look in the mirror and see how hot you are. yeah i see you flexing in the mirror after a workout. nice progress btw honey you look nice today.

dont worry about getting seconds, or thirds even, at dinner. dont worry about eating what society says is "too much" or "too little". eat until youre full. set aside what you cant finish for later so you dont waste food.

its okay to be greedy. its okay to want things for yourself. sometimes we see things that people have and we're like "dude i wish i had that." thats just human. envy and greed on that level are normal.

take a rest day. dont bother going to church this sunday. take a shower, read a book, drink some tea, eat some good food, pet a cat or dog. take care of yourself; its not lazy.

be angry with those who wronged you. punch a punching bag, write about how much you hate them, go work out aggressively and take care of your emotions in a way that doesnt hurt yourself or others. its okay to not forgive the people who hurt you. you arent doing anything wrong, babe.

embrace your sexuality (or, if it applies, asexuality, cause yall need love too). stop feeling shame for wanting pleasure. go read or watch something that turns you on. explore your body. ask your partner to try something new. if youre asexual, then fucking step on the people who say you need to have sexual attraction to be human. you dont. you dont need to be allosexual (or alloromantic) to "qualify as a human." we all experience life in different ways. find your way to experience it.

thought crime isnt real

do no harm but take no shit