phoewrightnix

[phoewrightnix]

I am free again to defend anyone who needs a lawyer, my previous client traveled to a demiplane to avoid coming to court.

[phoewrightnix]

New law just passed, artificers you have to have a licence to create magic items. This is a stupid law, so if any artificers get in trouble for it I'll defend you.

[phoewrightnix]

Reminder to clerics you need to fill out some forms before using divine intervention. I'm starting to get annoyed by how many deities are coming to me asking to sue clerics for spamming the ability to do nonsense.

[phoewrightnix]

Hello, I seem to have accidentally gotten myself into a fae deal while drunk last night. Is there any way I can get out of this? I really don't want to give up my firstborn.

If you can't get me to represent you (I've been very busy sorry), then you should point out that when drunk, you're hardly yourself. In fact, you're effectively a totally different person. This means any terms of the deal only apply to your drunk self. You'll have to go sober, but it's probably worth it.

[phoewrightnix]

It's very annoying that "an act of God" is a very common ruling here. If the god is the one responsible, they should also be brought to trial

[phoewrightnix]

Reminder to not kill towns guard, but even more a reminder that "I needed xp" is nonsensical and NOT a good defense

[phoewrightnix]

Sorry for not posting as much, I've been busy defending a druid accused of using summons to damage an ecosystem so bad that the local village starves to death due to lack of resources.

[phoewrightnix]

Due to the name of the "Unseen servant" spell implying the magically summoned entity has will and is being subjected to servitude, I'm proposing a name change to "Specter of Assistance".

[phoewrightnix]

If you ever open a chest and it's a mimic be careful cause they can sue you for invasion of privacy.

[phoewrightnix]

Surprisingly, seducing the dragon is not illegal! Unfortunately, doing so with the pure intention of stealing their hoard is in fact against the law and also kinda fucked up

[phoewrightnix]

I hate this place. I have to defend a druid who's being sued by A TREE because the tree didn't want to be subject to the speak with plants spell.

[phoewrightnix]

Quick reminder to write down in your will whether or not you consent to someone casting speak with the dead on your corpse. It would really save some time and paperwork

[phoewrightnix]

Just a reminder using power word kill is ALWAYS ILLEGAL there aren't exceptions!

[phoewrightnix]

Can you warlocks please stop using your patron to represent you in court, it never works out

[phoewrightnix]

Barbarians I understand your whole thing is using the unbridled force of your emotions to enhance combat abilities, but PLEASE stop doing it in the courtroom.

[phoewrightnix]

Druids PLEASE stop wild shaping in the courtroom it does NOT help your case

[phoewrightnix]

what's the legality of using wish

Case by case basis. If you try to wish someone out of existence, that's very illegal, for example. You could get your arcane focus taken away from you