pepperdee

[pepperdee]

Are you trapped on tumblr right now?

Is there something you planned to do before you got trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Are you yelling at yourself to get up and do the thing, but you can’t, because you’re trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Consider this your save point.

Put tumblr down, stand up, stretch, and go do the thing you planned to do. Future you will be incredibly grateful.

[pepperdee]

I just met a mother of an autistic child who thinks vaccines cause autism but is still pro-vaccine. Didn't know ppl like her existed tbh

[pepperdee]

merry christmas everyone!! the bastard fire god was in your chimney

I regret to inform you all that Blaze Augustine may be Santa Claus

[pepperdee]

I have a bachelor's of arts degree in English. The CEO of the hospital I'm currently going through online orientation for has his bachelor's in English Literature and his master's and the job he had before working for this hospital system was "bakery manufacturer." Literally making hotdog buns one day and then helping manage neurologists the next.

so i feel a little less like my degree was a waste

oh my god i actually have. a pdf of my diploma. i didn't fuck it up. i actually have a degree

[pepperdee]

oh my god i actually have. a pdf of my diploma. i didn't fuck it up. i actually have a degree

[pepperdee]

How my life as been this week

-I ACTUALLY FUCKING GRADUATED COLLEGE AND I DIDN'T FUCK IT UP YEEHAW!!!

-The diploma has my chosen name!!!

-I got a 9-5 job doing what I did for my parents (print shop) which gave me an experience pay-bump, and had I graduated earlier I would've earned an extra 40 cents but it's whatever it's still $19/hr (very livable for my area). It's also for a hospital (this becomes important later)/

-However. Since I didn't have my college diploma yet, technically, as the hiring process started just before finals week, I had to provide proof of a high school diploma.

-I am 23 and only came out when I was 21 so my high school transcript has my deadname on it

-The guy I've been talking to to get through the hiring process had to call me and say "Hey, Evan...so we received this high school transcript from somebody with your last name...is your other name [deadname]?" "Oh, haha, yeah!" "OH COOL because we tried to background check you and you don't exist. So now we can background check you!"

-So fun fact about me is that I've lived in Missouri my entire life. Except I grew up around Kansas City. Which means that I was born in a hospital on the Kansas side. So I have a Kansas birth certificate.

-This is all to say that I had to get vaccination records, because though I'm literally working in a cave printing fliers and such, I have to be fully vaccinated, because I work for a hospital now.

-I requested vaccination records from Missouri. It was suspiciously empty. CVS does not report vaccinations to the state, apparently! So that's a fun fact!

-My roommate was afraid that my parents didn't get be vaccinated for HepB. I was. But it was reported to the state of Kansas. So I had to get my records from THERE too.

-All of this turned into me deciding to try and figure out name and gender marker change stuff.

-Cannot change gender marker on birth certificate because I just had to be born in one of the four states that doesn't allow it.

-I can change it on my missouri driver's license tho

-Except I'm moving to Kansas in six months. My friend says I can get it changed on Kansas IDs tho.

-Except in Missouri I have to have proof of gender affirming surgery and I don't know if that just means hormones (which I've done) or if that just extends to top surgery (which I want) or if that means bottom surgery (which I don't feel the need to get asap, if at all)

-And THEN there's the fact that the only thing that I own that is still in my parents' name is my car. and while yes they did buy me a lego tuxedo cat for christmas (which I only know about because they bought it through amazon and i forgot to turn off notifications, woops) they're still upset that I'm trans and I don't want to deal with the drama of having to tell them to sign a paper giving a car to my chosen name

-I was originally going to say "all I want for christmas is my car in my name" but then it took me a really long time to get a job that pays decently so I just put legos instead

-Luckily I now have a good job and I'll have to get my tags changed to Kansas when I move so I'll need to get the car in my name but I want to wait until I'm closer to the move so it feels less sudden

-when the FUCK do I get my name changed then???

[pepperdee]

this was the assignment that gave me a mental breakdown btw

Professor: You have to make an 8-page brochure about a culture

Me: man I don't have any ideas!! I don't like the real world :(

Professor: This person made a fake passport for a country that doesn't exist and they did very well.

Me:

[pepperdee]

[picture ID: a teenage boy with dark hair, small wings, blue shorts, and gold leaves in his hair hugs the sun. The sun is white with an orange outline and is only slightly larger than the boy's torso. The background is of a dark blue cave with highlights of light. The cave floor has pools of wax and a few feathers.]

'Cause you think you really tried, you did your best 'To convince yourself you're good before you rest

Face the sun, face the sun Face the sun and fall

Concept drawing I did for half of my computer graphics 2 class! We have to design a book cover for 2 Penguin Classic books. I chose to do the Icarus myth and The Outsiders. While sketching my thumbnails, I came up with this idea of a young boy hugging the sun...and then spent until 1 am trying to get it how it was in my head. This is the closest I got. I'm still pretty proud of it.

The final version will be more cleaned up and I'm gonna try to make him look younger, but I kinda like the sketchy color style for this??? so who knows.

Lyrics are from Icarus - With Confidence.

[pepperdee]

not definitive because i did this instead of any of these

[pepperdee]

fun fact: one of the friends in this story was named Evan. I came out a year later and chose the name Evan. No, I did not have this character in mind when I named myself. The only reason I even remembered his name was because I submitted the story to a lit mag for an assignment

anyway i stayed up until 3 am writing about a guy who avenges his friends using his cursed name that kills anyone who writes it down while knowing his face

[pepperdee]

[pepperdee]

#25 on Spotify wrapped says how 2025 is going to go. how's it going for you?

[pepperdee]

"Can you tell me about your writing process?"

My writing process:

[pepperdee]

[pepperdee]

Last Line Tag

HI IT'S BEEN A THOUSAND YEARS. I have basically every tag game I was put in this year saved to a very, very large bookmarks folder on my toolbar and at this point I'm too afraid to poke at it.

@zmwrites tagged me in a last line tag and I just wrote some lines i needed an excuse to share, so thank you for that!

ANYWAY here's Dedrick's stream of consciousness morphing into his instinctual Ashon Lyricism going "hey i can use this" and just--

I saw the stars like few ever could. I saw the men that made them. They called me by name. I thought it was only mine. They gave me a destiny. The Curse given from the divine.

No I don't know where this came from either. I really hope it survives rewrites.

ANYWAY I guess I'll tag uhhhh @ashen-crest @magic-is-something-we-create @akindofmagictoo and/or anyone else who ALSO needs an excuse to share some lines they just wrote. GO NUTS

[pepperdee]

“I’m so sorry, baby,” I say, while adding another scene where he’s on the floor, bleeding and crying.

[pepperdee]

never underestimate the neurodivergent power of starting and finishing an essay the night it's due