papersofdiki

[papersofdiki]

you know what's more painful than a heartbreak? someone making you feel like you're loved when they're just craving for your attention and affection.

[papersofdiki]

find me on insta @dikiwords

[papersofdiki]

[papersofdiki]

Magnolia Branches

Forget me!

Oh, stranger with a pink heart

And a crown of lion's mane

Who's sitting below the tree to rest

From a far and unknown land.

Sleep on my ancient feet.

And let me look at your dimming solemn face

In eternity.

I can stay awake day and night,

Through the dark and through the bright;

Until it ends, i will always stay,

I will provide you this little heaven of mine,

To protect you from the rain,

And to welcome you with the petrichor.

by Diki Arivaldi [papersofdiki]

[papersofdiki]

fascinating.

He sees the ghosts

Of gummy smiles

Of bunnies gone errant

Light scatters over the sierras

Dust glimmers in some golden

Silhouette, some are angels now

All have traveled Eastward

But the murmurs remain

[papersofdiki]

Black Autumn

On every stellar branch of your woods, on every pure drop of your morning dews, every breath of your enthralling chills, you take my soul with you. How lively I became as a fall without its tangerine hue. As delightful as this road, cloaked in people's misery and footprints of lovers' decaying hope. You made me something divine; a grave, a tomb, an endless touch of sombre.

Diki Arivaldi [papersofdiki] September 27, 2024.

[papersofdiki]

and my poems

are just about

how you were just a figment

of my imagination;

insanity;

dreams.

because I've been under it

your spell

your skin

your name

maybe it was me

who was just a meaningless figment

of someone's existence

Diki Arivaldi september 26, 2024.

[papersofdiki]

Give answer

How does gleamingly fair hair

become dull acorn brown, and then

fade until asphalt grey? Mightn’t

he have clutched such fine gold, or

cached that mast of strength’s

potential just one more day? What

fool demands a child give answer

to the mirror’s hollowed face? Both

would do better by turning away

@nosebleedclub September Prompts 25. Pleading

[papersofdiki]

“I withdraw from people and places from time to time. I need space from a world that is filled with millions of mouths that talk too much, and never have anything to say.”

— Kaitlin Foster

[papersofdiki]

I was too obsessed with your laughter;

My desire to run these fingers

Across the winding crown of yours

And the binding skins of ours.

Sometimes,

When I thought of your statue

I was always illuminated in immense blue

Or a reflection of what I hoped was true.

As I didn't know how to deal with the hell I put me through.

Winding Path

by a.arivaldi

[papersofdiki]

The sky was black and white this morning, and that's how I remembered your eyes; a drug which brought me into a million depths.

-Achmad Diki (papersofdiki)

8.29.24

[papersofdiki]

Too Far

I wish I hadn't fallen for that gaze... those deep noxious eyes... and that swath of burnt roses...

I loved you; it killed me; it did nothing but hurt... only hurt...

I guess when we are lost, we just look for another void buried in somebody... we just want to be understood; to be seen; to be touched; to quit loneliness...

and I've seen the universe in your eyes, how beautiful it was told through your ravishing voice... felt so real--yet...I was so frightened you'd take me somewhere far from reality.

I guess... I loved you that much, huh?

and I'm not capable of loving anymore...

I am completely perished in your absence; consumed by every fragment of your touch... every essence of my deluded love.

Achmad Diki---8.26.24

[papersofdiki]

{Marya Hornbacher from Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia//stay away but come closer via Altusboy on Tumblr}

[papersofdiki]

when i try to hold your voice

your presence bursts into my wonder.

-papersofdiki

[papersofdiki]

“I’ve seen a lot of beautiful things with a heavy heart.”

— Albert Camus

[papersofdiki]

inner sensorium: another lost monolith; apes without any sight.

[papersofdiki]

“I had to learn to live without you and I couldn’t make sense of it, because I left so much of me inside of you.”

— R.M. Drake