painfulrant

[painfulrant]

Hey there!! Just thought Id give you a DF request

Could you possibly do a scenerio where Harry and gender neutral MC get their nails painted together to help lift their spirits at the school? If possible could it also possibly lean more towards platonic than romantic? If not, that's ok

Of course!!!! Thank you, love! 💕

Harry x Reader (Platonic)

Harry x reader

Platonic fluff

Dangerous Fellows!

“Hey, Harry! I have a question.” Out of everyone at the school, Harry would be the one to do this with me. After Judy’s disappearance, Jay bringing the zombies lunch, and Scarlett dying mysteriously… Everyone at the school was hostile and suspicious of each other. Except for Harry. Harry was always kind and stood up for you. He couldn’t help it, especially since he knew it wasn’t you causing any of it.

“Hey, Y/N. What’s up?” Harry asked, standing up from the boxes in the storage room. I felt a little nervous because of what I was fixing to ask so I just decided to show him. In both hands held two colors of nail polish. One was blue and the other was a hot pink which made you laugh. When he looked at the polish, to you, and back down to the polish with a confused expression, you smiled.

“Will you paint your nails with me?” I asked. I know it may seem weird but our school was in a desperate need of spirit. Maybe if we can show we are united together then others will join? I don’t know, it’s a weird way of thinking but I know it could work. He looked confused before shaking his head with a smile.

“Why not.” When he gestured to lead the way, I started laughing. He really was one of my best friends. We walked to the classroom meeting area and sat down on the desk near the window. Eugene, Ethan, Hailey, and Lawrence were all seated, waiting for Zion and Sue to get back from patrol. None of them said a word, to us or to each other, but they all studied us with curiosity and some with suspicions towards me. It’s okay though.

“You want yours done first or do you want to do mine?” He asked, grabbing something from his back that made us both start cackling like hyenas. In his hand, he held a fabric hair band thing with bows that had quotes on them. They were so soft and they just fit right over our foreheads and onto our hair. He looked like a little bunny, his bow being floppy and white like his hair. I couldn’t imagine what my blue one looked like.

“I’ll do yours first.” I stated, smiling. So I grabbed his hand and placed it on my knee before grabbing the dark blue and hot pink colors. His middle finger shall have dark blue and the other fingers be hot pink. Ethan had stood up and walked over to sit beside us, watching with intrigue but we paid him no mind. He was welcome to hang out with us if he wanted to.

Once I was done and once I quit messing up and getting nail polish all over his hand, I held his hands up in the light with a satisfied smile.

“It's your turn. Do you want them like mine?” Harry asked, waving his hand to try and dry the fingernail polish faster. The classroom door slid open as Zion and Sue walked in.

“So are y’all a thing now?” Was Zion's first words, his gaze switching between the both of us. I shook my head with a smile and Harry was rapidly shaking his head.

“Don’t get me wrong, I care for him and love him but not like that.” I stated, looking over to Harry to answer his question.

“Can I have the hot pink on the middle fingers and dark blue on the rest?” I asked. He just smiled and nodded, getting to work. He frequently flicked the floppy bow out of his eyes and when Zion and Sue sat beside Ethan and us, I smiled knowing that it was kinda working.

When he was done, I looked at my nails and laughed. Now we were matching. I grabbed his hand and held it up to the window, holding mine up too. Sue nearly choked when she saw the colors on which fingers made me laugh uncontrollably, to the point I nearly fell off the desk. Thankfully, Harry caught me, his hand on my back before setting me upright. He was also laughing. I think it’s been a good day and our goal was successful. Kinda. Eugene, Lawrence, and Hailey were all still sitting at the back not talking.

Now it’s time for the meeting. I hope this goes well.

[painfulrant]

I’m open to request!!!!

Request for:

- OuterBanks

1. JJ Maybank

2. Topper

3. Kelce

4. Sarah/Kaira (as friends)

- Dangerous Fellows

1. Ethan

2. Zion

3. Eugene

4. Lawrence

5. Harry

Put the character and then the situation you want them in with you! 🥰

[painfulrant]

JJ Maybank x Reader

Angst, Angst

There was a dull buzz echoing in the silent air around me. It felt cool… Not too cold nor too hot. Just warm enough to keep me slightly cold. The fabric beneath me was a soothing cold against my tired body and I could hear faint voices coming from somewhere. I’m no longer on the dock. To open my eyes was a challenge but it was one I overcame with a small hiss from the sun rising. I sat forward, my limbs screaming with exhaustion and weakness. Why am I still here?

I stood, at least to the best of my ability, and sluggishly made my way to the door before quietly cracking it open so I could see down the hall. I’m in the Chateau. That makes sense but I don’t remember anything past Topper and Kelce stopping by. The voices were still faint but audible enough to know they were all arguing. I don’t want to be around anyone, I just want to go back to the doc to think in the silence. The only way out though is through the window or through the front with the loud people. My ‘friends’ who apparently don’t care enough to know I have been gone for three days.

Sarah was on her business trip, her and JB having finally figured things out. Me, on the other hand, still haven’t seen or spoken to my supposed boyfriend in a week. Or two. Shaking my head, I closed the door back and walked to the old dusty window. It’s been a while since I’ve been in my own room, as a result of sleeping on the doc. I carefully slid the window up and began the process of sticking limb from limb through the window until my foot touched the ground and I only had one leg left in. No one came to the door, I doubted they would. The air hit me with a calming presence bringing a smile to my face. First one in a while. The wind was playing with my hair and moving my clothes to better fit my body, it seemed. Breathing in air was like breathing in life and while the trees danced before me, I couldn’t help but let hope fill my chest. Maybe it’s time I just go on my own? At least until Sarah or Kiara come back… Pope and John B have all taken JJ’s side but what his side consists of just confused me.

Afterall, I only told him about a job opening and interview I was excited about. That’s when he flipped out and left. He didn’t explain a single thing to me but he has time to explain it to the boys. At the memory, I frowned and looked down at my form. I need to start eating again, this isn’t healthy and I have a few people who care for me. He has no reason to be mad at me. I didn’t even get the job so that's a double reason he shouldn’t be mad. But he was and he is.

“Where you goin?” Speak of the devil and he shall appear. Moving my head to look at the figure I was beginning to think was a phantom, I scowled. I don’t want to talk with him.

“None of your business.” The hiss of words came out harder than I had expected but I didn’t back down. I could see his blue eyes searching mine for something while he moved his tongue over his teeth. His nervous habit.

“Can we talk?” The volume of his voice fell a level and I knew he knew that I was upset. Is he dumb? Did he not get my phone calls or my text or any of my notes begging him to talk to me about what’s going on?

“You didn’t seem to want to when I cried myself to sleep. Or when I called with tears in my eyes, when I begged you through messages and notes and even your best friends.” I growled, shutting the window the rest of the way and moving to start walking to the dirt road. That’s right, the dirt road and not the dock. I’m done being here until Sarah and Kaira get back.

“Wait!” He grabbed my arm, my body stilling with all the anger in me.

“I just didn’t have time.” He sounded scared. Good, maybe he can feel what I’ve felt all week. That’s a pathetic excuse though.

“Doing what, JJ? Were you entertaining another person? Too busy drinking or riding around on the bike non stop for the past week? Oh, wait… Maybe you were too busy avoiding me like I’m a f*ck*ng plague.” My voice had slowly but surely risen with the more hurt I felt.

“Don’t give me that excuse. ‘I didn’t have time’, bullsh*t.” My voice was back to calm and I felt childish for mimicking him but it’s gone way too far.

“Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is like saying, ‘I don’t want to.’” I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to even realize just how much truth laid in what I just said but it cracked my heart open more than it had been.

“Baby, just listen. I promise I’ll make it up to you. Just let me make sure you get stronger and healthier and I’ll tell you.” So this is what it’s about… He feels bad because I was in a depressive episode. Well I’m not now. Turning around, I kept walking and this time he let me. That didn’t stop him from screaming out, “you could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think!”

I know what I’m doing and I know what I’m thinking. I’m thinking that I’m done with all the lies and bull. I’m thinking I’m walking out of here and I’m going to become the best version of myself I’ve ever been. I’m thinking that as much as my heart screams at me to turn around… my brain and my soul knows it is the best decision. Goodbye, JJ Maybank. I’ll always love you but I can’t let you destroy me again.

“Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is like saying, ‘I don’t want to.’” - Lao Tzu

“You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.” - Unknown

[painfulrant]

Ethan x M/C - Comfort/Nightmares

It was a usual day at the school with the group. Everyone throwing suspicion my way for absolutely no reason. The sun rising casted beautiful orange rays that filled my chest with hope for the better.

Maybe hope is something you have to make for yourself?

His words were strong and clear in my mind, calming my racing heart. I haven't been sleeping much lately... The things lurking in the dark terrorize my dreams and drag me down so far, I sometimes fear I'll never make it back to the land of the living. If Judy wasn't acting so weird, I would ask her for her Judy special services.

She's hiding something from me. She avoids me during the days now, only returning to my room once I've fallen asleep, sometimes not at all. She'll talk to me but not like before... She has dark purple bags under her eyes making me wonder if she's also having nightmares or if it's from her sneaking around so much. If it was a boy, surely, she would tell me. Maybe she just suspects me like everyone else does. Scarlett hasn't exactly let up with all her bs.

The classroom doors slid open and one set of pitter-pattering footsteps fell still. I don't have the energy to look back, so I just rested my head against the window and watched the deserted city below get drowned in beautiful rays of color from the sky and water. There were very few, if any animals left but I know of at least four animals that have made it this far.

"Why're you awake so early?" Judy's cheerful voice didn't sound so cheerful but rather nervous. Is she truly scared of me? I haven't done anything to anyone here. Honestly, I could ask the same of her, but my head was pounding, and my vision was matching the beat of my heart. I just shrugged, knowing she'll drop it. The new version of her will anyways... The old her would be persistent and stubborn. She'd pull it out through my teeth. But Judy hasn't been the same in a couple of weeks.

The sound of the door sliding open once again made me clench my jaw in frustration. I was hoping for a few more hours of silence before others woke up and I was to be out casted from the peaceful classroom. Let Judy keep her secrets... I've tried enough already, and she's said some pretty hurtful things. Mostly everyone has.

That though brought tears to my eyes, but I refused to let them drop, listening for who the new person was. Between the nightmares and the bullying, I had no energy for anyone anymore. Zion and Ethan both seemed have to realized just that too which was strange. Ethan, the man who speaks little but speaks wisely and Zion the sarcastic cocky man who gets mad when I cry.

"Y/n, what're you doing up so early? You have night shift tonight." That was Lawrence who sounded kind and gentle as always but also like a mother scolded her child. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, biting my tongue to stop my attitude dripping out.

"Can't sleep." It was quiet for a second before Lawrence voice sounded.

"Oh. Well -" He was cut off by Judy, drawing my attention. She never does that... When I opened my eyes and turned to look at her, she had blood pouring from her eyes, nose, and mouth as well as her right arm missing. I gasped, standing up and stepping closer to the window and farther away from her. She just smiled, her teeth glistening red with blood that continued to drool from her mouth.

This is a nightmare. It has to be a nightmare. Tears were once again prickling my eyes, but it was clear enough to see Lawrence standing in the far corner, hidden by the shadows with glowing red eyes. He looked to be holding something in his hand and at a closer look, it was Judy's arm.

"No. No! This isn't real. You guys aren't real, I-" I gasped, pushing myself up against the window.

The door slid open once again and this time Ethan and Zion stepped through. Zion had blue, red, and purple bites littering his body while Ethan had foggy eyes and pale blue skin with his veins showing.

"Y/n... Step down from the window." Judy's sinister voice echoed around the room while the sky outside turned a deep scarlet shade of red.

I just stared at all of them, tears now freely streaming down my face.

"It's time to wake up." A voice behind me whispered, arms wrapping around my body. These arms were cold, and I couldn't help screaming when they drug me out the window.

I jerked forward, screaming with tears flowing like a stream off a mountain. Warm hands were gently grabbing my own and when I looked up, I saw a normal Eugene staring worriedly from the back of the classroom, Ethan in front of me with worried eyes but a blank face, and Zion behind Ethan with curious expression. Judy and Lawerence were nowhere to be found.

When I turned back to check if the sky was still red, I found the normal orange rays of the sunrise. The window where I stood, was open, my body literally an inch from dropping to my death. I gasped and stepped forward toward Ethan who quickly wrapped his arms around me. I almost died... My dream almost killed me. When did I even fall asleep.

I laid my head against Ethan's shoulder while he set his head on top of mine, his touch reassuring me that I wasn't dreaming, and he wasn't dead. None of them were. The shock stopped the tears from flowing, my heart rapidly beating.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, the pulsing vision and headache returning 10x worse than it had been before I fell asleep. He didn't say anything, but he didn't have to. I could fell his heart beating just as hard and fast as mine.

"We heard you scream while we were patrolling." Eugene spoke up, walking forward to close and lock the window behind us.

"You sounded like a zombie was tearing into you." There was no sarcasm or a hint of amusement in Zions voice. I must have really scared them.

"Come on." Ethan muttered, gently leading me from the classroom, the shock warrying off. My body trembled but there were still no tears. I'm too tired to cry.

When Ethan led me to his room, I looked to him with confusion.

"Sleep. You need it." He moved his blanket back, getting a spot ready for me. I felt bad and I think he knew because he looked up and shook his head.

"It's not your fault." With those final words, I walked forward to lay down. As soon as I did, he started to stand. I don't want him to leave... I need him here.

Quickly grabbing his hoodie sleeve, I looked up with scared eyes.

"Please don't leave me." I whispered, voice trembling with exhaustion but also fear. His eyes searched mine before he nodded and sat beside me. He let me lay my head against his shoulder and soon, everything grew dark. His heartbeat soothed my own heart and for once in a couple of weeks, I slept peacefully knowing he was beside me and with me to protect me.

"I promise to always protect you. I'm not leaving you."

[painfulrant]

One Of Them Girls by Lee Brice

You x Jay

“Come on, you’re gonna have fun. Quit sulking!” Lexis, Jay’s sister muttered, dragging his arm into the crowded house full of friends and strangers. He just grunted in annoyance, scanning the room for the one girl he knew would be here.

Are you one of them girls?

That peels off the Bud-Light label

Just might run a pool table

Roll your eyes if I call you an angel

Surely enough, he found you by the pool table, peeling off the Bud-light label from your glass as you waited for the man to your left to finally take his turn. He knew without a doubt, after watching you at any given party, that you would beat every man at that table without trying. Jay watched with amusement as the man to your right tried to hit on you, moving in close to pin you between him and the pool table. A steady heat filled his chest that he quickly tried to distinguish. He watched the innocent look that was no doubt a trap to draw the poor man closer with a small knowing smirk. Jay could faintly hear the word “angel” leave his lips before you giggled and rolled your eyes, moving just slightly closer before going straight faced and throwing a nut punch out. He could see your lips moving but couldn’t hear what he knew was probably a silent threat through the crowd.

Ain't you, one of them girls?

Ask you to dance, you say, "No"

Just to see how far I'll go

Your song comes on and your eyes closed

That's when I know, yeah

Jay huffed amusement before reaching out and taking a fresh closed beer from a guy who clearly had too much. The man turned and started in with the cursing so it was obvious he didn’t know who he was talking to. When his friends finally found him, they began scolding him and apologizing profusely. Jay only nodded and flicked his fingers. He didn’t feel like dealing with people tonight, he just wanted to watch his girl. He took a swig from the drink before he began making his way towards her, one goal in mind. Just a simple dance. Though he already knew the answer, he wasn’t going to quit trying. This was their routine. He’d watch, ask, get rejected, and try again at every party. The only reason he hasn’t given up is because every time she says no, she gets this spark in her eye and a small smile. It seems that she secretly enjoyed their run-ins as much as he does. Beautiful Crazy by Luke Combs soon came on over the speakers and as he stood in front of her with his hand out, he watched as her eyes closed with that same soft smile that seemed to melt his cold heart.

You got your heart on lockdown

Got a wall I gotta knock down

Kinda wanna do a shot now, come on now

He knew without a doubt that this woman standing and swaying before him had been hurt more times then he could imagine so he didn’t blame her for protecting herself the only way she could. That still didn’t mean he was going to give up though. He let out a small amused huff before nodding. “I’ll just try again later, Kotes.” With that, he walked back to his bar stool and sat, raising his hand to the bartender for two shots.

And you're one of them girls that

Ain't tryna meet nobody

You're just here for the party

If I'm wrong then stop me, yeah

You're one of them girls that

Ain't handin' out your number

You like to make us want you

You like to make us wonder

If you're one of them girls

'Cause I'm one of them boys

Who'll trade his whole world, hmm, yeah

She was here just to have fun and let everything go. He knew that and so did any other frequent male that came to these events. Everyone's eyes were on her but it was apparent that she wasn’t here to meet anybody or hand out any numbers. In fact, when Jay thought about it, he realized he had never seen a guy talk to her for more than a couple seconds whether that be from fear, anger, or dejection. Jay wondered if he really had a chance with this girl or if she just liked to drag men along… He was sure of one thing though. He wasn’t giving up. Once he got his girl, he wasn’t letting her go. He’d give everything and do anything to see her smile, keep her happy, and healthy. Even if he had to trade his whole world.

For one of them girls

Who likes to act all quiet

Sexy, not even tryin'

Yeah, you know I ain't lyin', damn right

He watched her silently, like a predator with prey. Except he intended her no harm and wanted to give her everything she’d ever need and want. She was quiet. Quiet and composed but still beautiful in every aspect possible. She said so much without saying a word. Any man in the room and most of the females would probably agree. In fact, most of the females held hateful glares while the males cat called and took any chance possible to get close to her. The whispers about her roamed around endlessly.

You one of them girls

Broke every heart in your hometown

On the day you rode out

Got 'em all wishin' on stars now

Jay turned around to ask for another shot and checked his phone, getting a message from his boss. The screech of a bar stool against the wooden floor brought his attention up to the beautiful girl that just sat herself beside him. His girl. As he studied her, he couldn’t help a small smirk. “I bet you broke every heart in your hometown,” Jay muttered, thanking the bartender for the glass and taking the shot swiftly. “Quite the opposite actually… got my heart broken and rode out.” She hummed, grabbing a drink of her own and yet again peeling the label off. He looked at her and studied the way her eyes darkened slightly and the smile she held seemed duller than usual. “Well they should all be wishin on the stars now for their loss.” The way her eyes widened ever so slightly and a soft hue of pink lighted her cheeks let him know she didn’t believe him one bit but still felt good about the compliment. “Maybe,” she smiled, looking at him before looking back to the dance floor.

If I find one of them girls that

Ain't tryna meet nobody

You're just here for the party

If I'm wrong them stop me, yeah

You're one of them girls that

Ain't handin' out your number

You like to make us want you

You like to make us wonder

If you're one of them girls

Well I'm one of them boys

Who'll trade his whole world, yeah

For one of them girls

“Would… you like to dance?” She asked, seeming nervous while fidgeting with her fingers that lay in her lap. His girl was so oblivious to how beautiful and capable she was in getting any man she desired, especially himself. He reached out and gently lifted her chin with his finger and thumb before giving a genuine smile. “As long as you can accept the fact that I can’t dance.” He was not a gracious dancer and he wanted her to know just that incase she decided otherwise. “Well as long as you don’t ask anything of me, I think I can accept that.” The soft cold touch of her hand curling around his arm made his heart thrash in his chest and heat flare through his body as if his body was trying to warm her just through that one touch. He let his beautiful mystery girl drag him to the dance floor with no objections. “I’ve felt you watching me…” She acknowledged, grabbing his hands and placing them on her hips while she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I have.” He wouldn’t try to hide it and he wouldn’t lie to her. He vowed that the day he felt his chest flutter in excitement from that one look she always seems to give him. “Why?” She asked, staring curiously up into his ocean blue eyes. “Because you're the most beautiful girl in the room and I’ve been waiting for the right moment to offer you the world.” With that, he moved so she did a little spin before coming graciously back to his chest. Her cheeks were a bright red but the smile she held made everything about her glow in the shadowed room, no doubt causing the jealousy in the room to heighten to new levels.

You're one of them girls

I wanna put my lips on

Hold all night long

Write a little love song

“I’ve heard about you, ya know.” That caught his attention, him tilting his head with furrowed brows while rocking them back and forth to what he hoped was the rhythm of the music. “Oh, yeah? And what exactly did you hear?” He asked. “That you're a stone cold d*ck who won’t let any girl near him.” The way she giggled made him bite the inside of his cheek to withhold the smile dying to be let out. “Only because I already have my eyes set on someone,” he started, pausing to watch her expression which seemed to fall a little at the mention of a girl. Little did she… “She’s beautiful in every way. Makes all the guys fall in line behind her and she’s the one person I need to put my lips on and hold all night. I suck at singing but if this girl asked, I would without a second of hesitation.”

For one of them girls that

Ain't tryna meet nobody

You're just here for the party

If I'm wrong then stop me, yeah

You're one of them girls that

Ain't handin' out your number

You like to make us want you

You like to make us wonder

If you're one of them girls

Well I'm one of them boys

Who'll trade his whole world (his whole world)

For one of them girls

“She sounds amazing…” Jay noticed the way she withdrew inside herself so he pulled her closer and placed a soft kiss to the crown of her head. “She is. In fact, she’s in my arms right now believing that I’m speaking of another when all I’ve ever wanted is right here.” The confession made her pause and look up with wide glossy sparkling eyes. He didn’t want her to cry and he couldn’t read her enough to know whether it was from fear or happiness that she held those tears in her gorgeous eyes. “I’d offer my whole world for you… but I know you aren’t ready if the tears in those gorgeous eyes of yours are any indication. I'll wait until you're ready. Just promise me you’ll wait on me too.” He hummed, placing another kiss on her cheek this time before gently tapping her waist three times and slowly pulling away.

Hmm, one of them girls

“We’ll see.” Though it wasn’t what he wanted to hear, he couldn’t stop the small smile from the amount of stubbornness in such a small body. He chuckled at the height difference between the two. She was perfect and he wouldn’t change her for nothing.

“We’ll see then.” He responded before he disappeared into the crowd, leaving her on the dance floor while she gently held herself. Her heart thrashed just as much, if not more, than his and she knew it would only be a matter of time before she gave in to him. And she didn’t think she’d regret it when the time came.

[painfulrant]

Send requests!

Hey, darlins! I’m in the mood to write some stuff so send some request.

Required: A song and a character

Characters: JJ Maybanks, 141 unit, or my personal OC.

Personal OC info: He’s 6’2, countrified, sarcastic, protective, dirty blond brown hair, ocean blue eyes, a little bit of a dick but never to you… Nickname is Jay. Basically a mixture of Dean Winchester and Klaus Mikaelson.

Warning: Haven’t written in a while so probably poorly done. 💕

[painfulrant]

Hey Sweethearts! ❤️

I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted! I’ve just been overloaded with stuff and just kinda waiting on some request. If y’all have any request, I’m more then okay with writing them for the following characters: JJ Maybank, Rafe Cameron, and Kelce. ❤️

Just send some request and I’ll write them to the best of my abilities!

I love y’all! Be safe, give thanksgiving to God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, and have an amazing day. ❤️

[painfulrant]

To whom ever may be reading this,

Please take a second to stop what you’re doing and pray with me. If this ain’t your type of thing then don’t worry about it but for those of you who will… please do.

Hey God,

I know it’s been a while, for not only me but many people. I just want to take a moment to ask that you watch over our soldiers; the soldiers who have passed, the soldiers who are still here, the hurting soldiers, and the soldiers who found peace. They’ve been through things we can only imagine… So God, our father, please take care of them. Let them find peace and guide them to where they need to be. They deserve so much more than they were and are given. You’re everything and you’re who we trust, God. Please don’t let our soldiers in the past, present, or future suffer by themselves. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

[painfulrant]

Boy Trouble

Sierra & Reader (friends)

Angst and Comfort

Boy Trouble

Deathly silent… That’s the only way possible to explain the silence that engulfs your form. The moon is high and the water moving along with the trees who dance and twirl, throwing confetti leaves over anything around. Yet there is no sound. There are no crickets, no whispers from the wind, no cracks or knocks from the trees or even the swooshing of the tides. It was scary-peaceful to say the least. It had your hairs on the back of your neck standing up and goosebumps appearing on your bare arms.

A loud slam of what you assumed was the Chateau door echoed around the night, sending birds flying before everything aside the sound of approaching footsteps quieted. A sigh sounded behind you before another body joined yours in the hammock. Without a word, you reached down and grabbed a beer, passing it to who you soon found to be Sierra. Her face was red and from the way her eyebrows were scrunched up, you knew she was furious and hurt. Her glossy eyes and tear stain face also gave away to what may have been a fight between her and John B, your best friend.

You both just watched the water and drank your beers and silence, not needing to say one word to understand each other. Boy problems, to be put in simple words. For her, you assumed, it was a fight with John B about her work trip. She would be gone for a week and travel to South Africa to experience the different social classes there. You weren’t totally sure what her job had to do with it but you knew she was excited. A world round trip to South Africa for free? You understood why she was excited. Only down part was that it was only a two person trip which means it would be her and her boss. Her boss happens to be a male.

As for you, it was that JJ has been actively ignoring and avoiding you. Everything was going well until you told him that you got a job interview for the hospital nearby to become an ultrasound technician. Usually, he would’ve been ecstatic and you knew this… but the way he acted and what he said really hurt you. Not to mention, the only time he’s been coming home is at night, after John B checks for JJ to see if you were asleep. Only once did you confront him when you were pretending to sleep and he’s been gone since. Still haven't returned home. It hasn’t been long since, only a night, but that one night and the way he’s been acting brought you great suspicion.

“Anything on JJ?” Sierra asked with a hoarse voice, both of you still watching the water. Dropping your eyes, you took a deep breath before shaking your head.

“Not since last night. I figured I’d stay out here tonight so he can actually get more than three hours of sleep.” You mused softly, playing with the fringy ends to the thin blanket over you. The silence returned for only a minute before you glanced up to study Sierra. The tears had dried but her eyes were still puffy. She’s ready to talk, just waiting for someone to ask. You knew it so you let out a small amused huff and gently nudged her with your knee.

“Was it over the trip?” You asked, pulling the good-for-nothing blanket closer to your freezing body.

“Yeah. We were just fixing to lay down an-” Before she could finish, you throughout an ‘The less I know the better’ statement, referring to where exactly that sentence was leading. A genuine laugh fell from her lips bringing a smile to your face.

“Anyways, I told him about the trip and how it’s free but he wouldn’t be able to go. He was excited for me, kissed me, and asked when I leave… but I couldn’t just not tell him that I’m going with my boss who I know he doesn’t like.” She explained before bringing the bottle to her lips and drowning the rest.

“I’m guessing he didn’t take it too well then.” You continued, looking back to the sea. Your mind drifted to what and where exactly your boyfriend was and if, by chance, he could be amusing another person.

“Nope. Said I wasn’t going. I told him I had to or I’d lose my spot as manager.” She paused and you could see the tears she was holding back, though you didn’t state as much.

“He said that traveling is like flirting with life. It’s like saying, ‘I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is not my station.’ and it felt like a double stab. As soon as he grew quiet, I knew it held double meaning and that was it. I came out here to breathe.” The laugh that fell from her lips was anything but humorous and you found yourself frowning from the situation. You understood why John B was hesitant with their past but you also knew this job was important to Sierra. With a lazy shake of the head, you grabbed two more bottles, popped them open, and handed one to Sierra.

“Join the club, sister.” You muttered before the deathly silence from before returned, both of you being content with it.

[painfulrant]

The Prince

Kelce X Reader

Angst

Poorly edited!!!!

It had been a bit since anyone came around. The silence was both comforting and horrific, having not been used to it. It was dark, the moon eliminating different shades of gray while the breeze carried the tree branches all around.

Peaceful and deceitful. For all the peace that the stars, the moon, the wind, and nature around you offered… it’s all deceitful as to how you really felt. Screams, wails, and words bounced around your head, hearing everyone's voice on repeat but nothing at all. Seventy-two hours and twenty-three minutes of it, to be exact.

The dock’s your favorite place. No one thinks to check it when you disappear… or maybe no one cares enough to come looking like they would with your boyfriend or best friends. If they could even be called that anymore. No one’s even tried to check in with you. No messages, no calls, no swinging by the house or even searches for you. You could be dead for all they know and they wouldn’t give one care in the world.

You watched as a boat flew across the water, slowly growing closer and closer, blinding you when the headlights swept over you. All of a sudden, the boat's engine cuts off. It should have startled you and you were very suspicious as to why it did but you didn’t move. Whether it be that you didn’t have the energy after not having water, food, company, or hope for three straight days or whether it be because you truly didn’t care what happened to you. It seemed that no one else cared either.

So you laid there, not caring to turn your head away from the blinding lights that made your head throb. There were no tears or clenching in your chest. It was all just emptiness… like your body was hollow and your ribs were just the entry to the dark space. When the lights finally turned off, you found yourself in front of Kelce, one of the kook princes, and Topper, another kook prince. They both shared a confused and concerned look with one another before Kelce ultimately decided to just move towards you.

Honestly, you were expecting a kick… maybe a few punches or nasty words thrown at you. You were slightly disappointed when neither came too. Instead, Kelce stood over you, studying your figure before taking a deep breath and sliding down next to you. Your focus was now on the stars, not caring for your safety or for what they were about to tell you. Probably some message to your boyfriend or something.

Shock streamed through you, the first emotion in hours to fill the empty void, when Kelce's soft voice carried through the wind to you.

“What’s got you out so late?” The question was simple and sweet. No prying and no hints of disgust or manipulation in them. Just pure curiosity. You turned your head over so slightly to glance at Kelce before looking back to the beautiful stars that seemed to reach out to you through small beams of multicultural light.

A sigh disturbed the peacefulness of the wind but you didn’t move and didn’t bother to speak. Then the sound of footsteps trailed right behind you until you could now see Topper standing over you. When he laid down, you watched as he turned his head to study you while you continued to stare at the sky.

They seemed to understand that you just wanted peace and quiet so they laid there with you for about two hours straight, refusing to leave you, even when the moon began to disappear beyond the horizon and the sun's beams began to light the sky.

“Do you want to leave this dock? Maybe go get something to eat?” Topper asked and the hesitation was clear in his voice. If he was bringing up food then it was probably beginning to become obvious that you haven’t eaten in a few days and the thought of people being able to tell just ripped the hollow feeling open wider.

It took you a few moments before ultimately you decided to just shake your head. The movement caused a spell of dizziness but you didn’t complain or even react to it. When Kelce sat up and watched you for what felt like eternity, you finally shifted a little and glanced his way. His confused asserting features smoothed out to one of a poker face before he reached his hand out. What for, you don’t know.

“If you wish to approach me, be gentle. You may break my fragile glass of solitude.” You whispered, or rasped, your voice having not been used since the group argument that took place a few days earlier. The warning was supposed to be sarcastic but it came out more of a broken plea that you winced at hearing.

Kelce’s hand finally came down gently on your hair, smoothing it out around the dock and away from your face.

“I do not wish to harm you, as much as I’d love to piss your boyfriend off.” He muttered, continuing to gently run his fingers through your hair.

“He wouldn’t respond the way you think… if he responded at all.” You exclaimed softly, your voice cracking with the fresh wave of sorrow washing over you from having said the thoughts that have been swimming in your head for a couple days now. Dizziness threatened to overtake you once more, along with a nauseating pain in your lower stomach. Still, you refused to move.

“You deserve someone who answers.” Kelce sighed, looking up. You could see the frustration and pure hatred he felt at the very moment towards the pogues yet you couldn’t understand why. Why does he seem to care for you? Why take the time he could be partying or doing rich people things to lay down with a broken filthy little girl. It made no sense.

You went to answer but your vision began to throb with your heart so you offered a small but genuine smile.

“You don’t have to stay, you know.” You muttered, closing your eyes from the exhaustion that wrapped around you like a cold security blanket. Everything was finally becoming numb instead of hollow… not cold or warm.

“Hey, don’t close your eyes.” It was both a warning and a plea that tore from Kelces chest but nonetheless, you just smiled while your breathing ability began to grow less and less. Not hurting, hollow, or happy. It was just numb, everything. Your lungs and stomach weren’t screaming at you and your head finally calmed. The last few things you heard were Topper, Kelce, and what sounded like the Pogues screaming and arguing, the warmth of Kelce’s arms being replaced by someone else's arms. Who? You didn’t know. You felt a warmth against your cheek but it was very faint before you felt nothing at all. Finally, a kind of calmness took the squeeze over your heart and mind away, finally being able to sleep and rest peacefully.

[painfulrant]

Silence is a dangerous game. Do not be the reason someone goes silence. It changes them. I know this because it’s changing me.

[painfulrant]

Be kind. Words hurt a lot more than you think. They stick in peoples mind, rotting their beliefs of themselves before the words finally change that person.

[painfulrant]

Could I get a JJ fic based of diet mountain dew by Lana del ray <3

Thank uuu

Here you are, love! I hope you enjoy. ❤️

Diet Mountain Dew by Lana Del Rey

JJ maybank x Reader

Angst!!!!

Requested ❤️

You’re no good for me

Baby, you’re no good for me

You’re no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want…

The shadows, it seemed lately, have been the only consistent thing much like the light the sun generously gifts us. Yet with each ray and with each shadow, you found yourself barely surviving. Sitting alone at a table that used to be the both of yours, you stirred the diet mountain dew sitting in front of you. You haven’t touched it… tasted it. You just simply sat, stirring lost to your own memories.

Diet Mountain Dew, baby, New York City

Never was there ever a girl so pretty

Do you think we’ll be in love forever?

Do you think we’ll be in love?

You allowed yourself a small miserable smile while you pondered whether the love you held for him would ever leave. It certainly didn’t feel like it. You weren’t sad… nor were you angry. You were empty and somehow, in some way, that was worse than any other feelings. The break up was still fresh in your mind.

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Can we hit it now low down and gritty?

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

The feeling of his hands and lips against your skin seemed to be constantly there. No matter how often you wash. No matter how many times you sat in the bath or stood in the shower, sobbing and trying to scrub his scent… his touch away. He didn’t love you anymore and the idea that you were even carrying one part of him with you when he obviously wasn’t made you nauseous with sorrow and grief. Yet, even as you lay broken in the water that ran over your skin, almost as though it were trying to sooth you, you knew you carried a love for him that no one could take. Not even yourself.

Baby, put on heart shaped sunglasses

'Cause we gonna take a ride

I'm not gonna listen to what the past says

I've been waiting up all night

Your thoughts were soon interrupted by someone who sat across from you. The way her eyes were shielded and basically held heart in them, you knew that she was taken and she was very happy to be taken. She gently pushed your diet mountain dew closer to you with a sad smile, having known with one look that you now experienced what both of you were dreading. Offering a small smile, you sipped the diet mountain dew trying to ignore the past whispering and playing in your head. You haven’t slept well in weeks and last night wasn’t the first night that you just decided to give up on sleep.

Take another drag turn me to ashes

Ready for another lie?

Says he's gonna teach me just what fast is

Say it's gonna be alright

When you were half way done with the diet mountain dew, you heard the chime of someone entering the nearly empty wreck. Glancing up, you felt your heart turn to ashes, everything becoming numb when you saw him with her. JJ and Kiara stood in front of you, having not noticed you yet. You knew without a doubt that this wasn’t new… but you weren’t ready for the pretty lies he would surely offer if he did indeed spot you. The last words he muttered to you brought a shocking humorous laugh to your lips. You suppose he really did teach you what fast was, for he seemed to move on pretty d*mn quickly.

“It’s gonna be alright, kotes.” Sierra muttered from across the table, staring at you as though she felt and shared the pain that was threatening to blow the ashes to your burned out heart away.

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Never was there ever a girl so pretty

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

Slowly sipping on the diet mountain dew, you didn’t try to stop the nauseating feeling from emerging once more. Unbeknown to you, every man in the room kept his eyes on you, whether it be because they cared or because they truly thought you were the most beautiful women they’ve seen. Yet the one person you truly wanted and loved, did not want or love you back. You stood and moved to walk to the bathroom, the churning growing worse with the sudden movements.

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Can we hit it now low down and gritty

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

You paused upon seeing the same lips that had touched every part of your body, kissing the women who you had thought was your best friend. The sickness increased and that was when you realized that for the first time since the breakup, the tears were surely flowing. Lord knows you held all the pain and tears inside, letting it rot you from the inside out. Letting it fester into a nothing void that filled your chest and made it impossible to cry… until now. You found yourself asking if you’d truly ever be able to get over him or if this love you carried would always be with you.

Let's take Jesus off the dashboard

Got enough on his mindㅤ

We both know just what we're here for

Saved too many times

You ripped the cross necklace off, letting the sobs rack your body, not caring if anyone heard. You knew he couldn’t hear it but even if he could, he has enough on his mind that he wouldn’t give two glances towards the painful choking sounds leaving his last love. We both knew we were here to forget the pain he caused you and him to be able to move on and be with her happily. Part of you wished he’d swoop in and save the day as you had allowed him to too many times before. The other part of you whispered to you that he never would again and that you were wasting tears and emotion on someone undeserving of either.

Maybe I like this roller coaster

Maybe it keeps me high

Maybe the speed it brings me closer

I could sparkle up your eye

However, that’s when the nausea heightened to a new unbearable level, almost as though you were on a roller coaster. One you seemed to like, nonetheless. It allowed you to feel. To feel disgust and hurt. Maybe this was the only way to keep feelings, almost as though you were on an emotion high that you could only get from having your heart shredded, burned, crushed, and blown away in the wind. All by the same male. The wind would make beautiful colors, no doubt and you knew it would resemble the happiness you once felt.

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Never was there ever a girl so pretty

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Can we hit it now low down and gritty?

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

After having emptied your already pretty empty stomach, you sat against the cool wall and let yourself cry until you had no tears left. Until the aching in your chest dulled down to a study rhythm of painful throbs. Until your tear stained cheek had dried enough that it wouldn’t make your face break out. Until you felt your mind finally ease with the exhaustion that laid upon it.

You're no good for me

Baby, you're no good for me

You're no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want you

You're no good for me

Baby, you're no good for me

You're no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want you, I want you

You wouldn’t admit out loud that you still wished he was here. That you still wished he were yours. You would let yourself think it through. You would let yourself feel before you had to put on the mask of happiness and have to put on your big girl pants. You’d admit to yourself that you still so desperately wanted and missed him. That every second without him, you felt your heart detach more and more from reality, your sanity slowly slipping away while you tried to convince everyone of something you didn’t want to convince them of. That you were okay. That you weren’t slowly and surely falling apart and that you didn’t fall in a hole so deep and dark, you weren’t sure if you could claw your way back out.

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Never was there ever a girl so pretty

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

Baby, stoppin' at 7-Eleven

There in his white Pontiac heaven

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Never was there ever a girl so pretty

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

Diet mountain dew, baby, New York City

Can we hit it now low down and gritty?

Do you think we'll be in love forever?

Do you think we'll be in love?

After a while, you just sat there staring blankly at the wall, feeling nothing at all but the exhaustion that threatened to make your eyelids finally fall. You felt a weird sense of calmness… one that brought nothing but allowed you to finally breathe. You would be okay.

You're no good for me

Baby, you're no good for me

You're no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want

You're no good for me

Baby, you're no good for me

You're no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want

You're no good for me

Baby, you're no good for me

You're no good for me

But baby, I want you, I want

You would be okay because all though you wanted the only man to ever break your heart in more ways than you knew were possible, you knew that he wouldn’t and could never love you in that sense again. You knew that you would be okay because when you look around you, you realize there were still people who cared. People you couldn’t let down. You knew you’d be okay because you didn’t have any other option then to be okay. So you smiled softly, stood up and looked at yourself in the mirror. You didn’t recognize yourself but the calmness you felt gave you enough confidence to smile once more to the mirror. To the women inside it. Finally, you turned and headed back out to finish your diet mountain dew, paying the waitress for the extra wait and allowing Sierra to lead you out the door without looking back once. Even when your heart screamed and pleaded with you to turn around and go to him. It would be alright. You would be okay.

[painfulrant]

Peace and Life

JJ Maybank x Reader

Little Angst, mostly fluff

Peace and Life

It was a normal day at the Chateau, everyone packing up to get on the boat. Kiara carried a cooler of ‘apple juice’ while JJ rolled a few. Everyone had been so on edge lately that you had just decided to get everyone out and on the water to let worries wash away with the tides. Of course, they’d come and go but there were other people present and you knew that with everyone around, no one would think of things for long.

When Pope and John B got back with gas for the boat, Sarah finally came out of John B’s room having just woken up. She looked to be decently clothed but you couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled from you.

“Love, you’ve gotta change. It’s quite warm today and we’re going on HMS Pogue.” You called kindly with a soft smile before you watched her freeze and groan, turning around before disappearing with a loud thud from the door having been slammed shut.

“Someone's cranky today.” JJ muttered what you were guessing was supposed to be to himself for when you turned with a raised eyebrow and amused eyes, he rolled his eyes and turned away. Your lover boy has had quite the attitude today and you weren’t sure if it was just him waking up on the wrong side of the bed or something that someone did.

Nonetheless, you knew he wasn’t angry or upset with you so you glided over, squatting in front of his form that sat with his elbows propped on his knees, a paper and stuff in his lap. He wore his black shirt with his swim trunks and his red cap backwards which you always loved.

“I think everyone may be.” You hummed, offering a smile. You gently grabbed his hands to stop him from his activity before moving your head so you could see his ocean blue eyes. Something was off. His eyes said as much from the unnatural dark shade to his eyes and the way he seemed to be holding every emotion behind a wall that he hoped would numb them all.

“What is it, sweet man?” You whispered, letting your fingers gently run and trace his face. Over his eyebrows, along his cheek bones, then down to his jawline. On and on, trying to ease the both of you.

He took only a moment, studying you as he usually does before deciding whatever it was wasn’t important enough to tell you. It stung but you knew it was his way of keeping the both of you safe from negative emotions and cruel thoughts. He looked down and grabbed his hat, squeezing the bill between his hands before running his fingers through his hair and placing it back where it was before.

“Nothing. Come on, they’re all waiting.” He answered, interlacing your hands so you couldn’t pull away. Not that you wanted to in the first place, you knew it was just a fear of his and you had no issue being close to him. You loved it in fact.

When the HMS Pogue stopped, water surrounded all sides with glimmering reflections of the sun that cast heated rays all around. Everyone was talking and chatting, JJ having just tried to pull off his ‘party trick’ where he stands on the edge of the boat while it’s still moving, holding a beer so he can try to catch the liquid escaping the bottle. It was funny to watch but annoying when beer matted everyone's clothes and hair.

You now sat in his lap, moving one of the many wash clothes that you hid inside the HMS Pogue seats against JJ’s beer smothered face. He was laughing and nodding along with Pope while the girls played music and chatted about their men and their experience. Which happened to be the exact reason you weren’t hanging out with them at the moment.

When JJ turned his attention to you, you saw his eyes darken once more and felt a creeping doubt that maybe it was you who he was upset and angry with. For what, you had no clue. You tilted your head, smile falling with concerned eyes that searched for the answer through his. When his eyes studied where your smile once was, a sharp ping jutted through your heart.

“Did I do something wrong?” You asked quiet enough so the others couldn’t hear but loud enough so he could. When his expression changed from one of distant thinking to one of shock and then again to a slightly frustrated emotion, you couldn’t help but begin to fidget with your hands that laid in between the both of you.

“No, of course not. I just…” He started, breaking the eye contact that you so desperately wanted.

“I can’t offer you anything that others could. I can’t give you a home… or money, or even really peace.” He stated, growing more frustrated by voicing his thoughts out loud. “I can’t support you and heaven forbid if you ended up pregnant, I couldn’t support the baby either.” He lifted you gently, making sure not to harm you but rushing to set you down and stand up. To leave this conversation because he didn’t want to hear your usual reassuring words. He knew they weren’t true and he didn’t want pretty lies.

You watched as he walked away, feeling your heart clench more with each step he took. What did this mean? Was he thinking of leaving? Of dipping on the relationship? All these worries hit you like a one-ton truck and you felt a dizzying spell from it. Swallowing the pain down, you stood before offering a smile to John B who had watched the encounter with furrowed eyebrows. It wasn’t unusual for you and JJ to fight but it was unusual for you to have just let him walk away. Usually, you wouldn’t allow that, that being if you could stop him in the first place.

Walking to the edge of the HMS Pogue, you stripped your shirt, remaining in your jean shorts and swimsuit before jumping into the cold refreshing water. One of the many reasons you loved water was for the fact that it acted as an escape for you. You could usually hold your breath for a while, just sitting in the water and letting your thoughts and emotions out around you.

So that’s exactly what you did. You let the air from your lungs slowly seep out as you sink before letting your body lay limp, the tides moving you. Your eyes were closed and you just let the sound and feeling of the tides wash over you, letting it ease your worries and numb your feelings. You knew this way of releasing emotions wasn’t necessarily safe but nonetheless you still continued to do so. Soon your lungs were screaming for air but you couldn’t find it to move just yet. You wanted the rush that came with having a time limit to swim to the top. You wanted the peace you felt in that instant to last forever. Forever wasn’t an option though.

As you broke the surface of the water, you found everyone searching the water before letting out a relieved breath from seeing you smile and wave.

“Don’t you ever do that sh*t again!” Kie screamed, worried lining her every feature. You stared confused before JJ cursed under his breath, calling you a ‘psychotic woman’, before jumping in as well.

“You were under twice as long as usual.” Pope explained with an impressive look.

“How long?” You asked, confusion and surprise making you ask the question you really didn’t want to know.

“Four minutes.” He answered, shaking his head. Your eyes bulged before you felt JJ’s arms finally slip around you. Without one second of hesitation, you turned and wrapped your arms around his neck, knowing he had probably flipped out when you hadn’t surfaced at your usual time.

“I’m okay.” You reassure before moving so you could place your hands on both sides of his face, not allowing him to move or look away.

“You cannot find peace by avoiding life.” You stated before your features soften a bit, placing a soft lingering kiss to the crown of his head. “You are my peace, J. If you keep avoiding life then you’ll never find peace. Okay? So stop trying to push me away.” You demanded.

He was silent, just staring at you before you took a deep breath and made a pouting face.

“Okay. I’ll work on it, sweets.” He muttered before glancing down to your lips.

“Will you kiss me now?” He asked, hope laced into his voice.

“Not yet. I have one more thing to say.” You answered, biting your lip with a half smile that you attempted, and failed, to hide.

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” You hum, teasing but also being completely serious. You knew for some time he was struggling with his self image and you decided now would be an appropriate time to hint at it. Whether he found out what you were truly trying to say or not was up to him.

He stared at you with asserting eyes before he thinned his lips, trying to decipher what you meant. You gave him only a moment before speaking again.

“Now I will kiss you.” You whispered, leaning forward to gently brush your lips with his, quick and swift but holding all the love and affection that the two of you had.

When fake gagging noises sounded from the boat, you smiled against JJ’s lips, letting giggles fall from this. Today has definitely been a good day.

You cannot find peace by avoiding life. - Virginia Woolf

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. - George Bernard Shaw

[painfulrant]

A Long Day

JJ Maybank x Reader

Fluff, comfort

A Long Day

The numbers on the page blurred together with all the thoughts and the blood boiling beneath your skin. Having cried two times already from exhaustion and frustration, you latched your hands to your scalp feeling the heat, your body temperature, rise once more. Your chest contracted with sobs that were being held in, your stubbornness not letting a sound leave your mouth. If you couldn’t understand simple algebra then how were you supposed to do trigonometry and calculus classes?

Thankfully, the door to your room opened, drawing your attention there instead of on the packet of trig and scattered pages on the bed. Shock would’ve and probably should have been your first reaction but from all the negative emotions and thoughts swarming around you, you were thankful for whoever was about to step through that door. Serial killer, boyfriend, or not.

Fortunately, JJ walked in with a huff, throwing his sweat covered, dirty shirt into the chair that sat in the corner. With one look, you could tell he was exhausted. He stood there looking at the mess in front of you before slowly looking at you with a confused expression that soon turned to concern when he watched the first tear drop.

He silently walked over, not a word between either of you, before gently clasping your hand in his. Deciding to just follow and not argue, you stood and followed him to the bathroom, concentrating more on making the tears stop then watching where you were going. Before you knew it, the room turned from the dull blue of your room to the light tan bathroom with a curtain that had a cow skull on it.

You looked in the mirror looking at your tear soaked, puffy eyed face before having to fight against the tremble under your lip. You looked horrid and you hated it. Lack of sleep, stress, and not enough food had done wonders for you and a dull ache in your chest slowly began to grow into more of a sharp pain, squeezing the air from your lungs.

Needing a distraction, you turned the nozzle to the bath, letting your fingers rest under the water and adjusting it so it’s lukewarm. When warm fingers ran over your shoulders and down your back, under the silky cloth of your tank top, you sighed softly feeling your worries slowly drain.

You let him undress you, before you sank down in the bath and opened your arms so he could join you. Once he finally settled, you wrapped your legs around his waist and began to gently run your hands over his shoulder, back, and neck, rubbing out any tense spots. He was sore, the way he walked and tensed anytime your hands ran over a certain part said so.

After several minutes of silence and both of y’all’s hair and body being washed and scrubbed, he finally craned his neck backwards to find your eyes. You let your fingers run through his hair before softly brushing your lips against his shoulder.

“I may be getting fired.” JJ muttered, looking forward to where his hands ran over your thighs, giving you goosebumps and immediate mind numbing comfort.

“What happened?” You hummed, holding him closer. It was no lie that JJ didn’t like his job but it kept the both of you afloat.

“I didn’t know how to do something… Instead of asking, I tried to do it and failed, resulting in the company having to pay for it.” He all but whispered and you were sure that if he were facing you, not only would his face be red but he wouldn’t be able to keep eye contact from how embarrassed he was.

You let out a small amused huff before laying your head on his shoulder.

“I’m not sure if I can fix it.” He finally stated, his hands gently squeezing your thighs like a stress ball.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” The words were encouraging and dipped in honey and love. At least you hoped they were. When he didn’t answer for a bit, you began to grow weary. Questions of him being mad at you or you having responded the wrong way were tossed repeatedly around your head but all worries were soon snuffed out when he brought your hand, that laid against his chest, up to his mouth and placed a kiss to every one of your knuckles.

“You gonna tell me what the mess was?” He asked, shifting so he lay on the opposite side of the bathtub before opening his arms to you. An instant smile lit your face, happy to be able to relax against him.

“Algebra… It’s just a review for the class but the professor insists on us relearning these ways. I didn’t learn them to begin with though. You know how our school was.” You answered, trying to keep it short so you can just forget about it. It seemed he knew better though.

“And what part had my pretty girl crying? fixing to tear her hair out? Hmmm?” He asked, tracing circles around your belly button. You clucked, acting as though you were thinking of an answer before he gave a soft pinch to your stomach, a subtle but affectionate warning. So with a sigh, you explained, playing with your hands that were in your lap.

“I just don’t understand any of it. I’ve been trying for hours with nothing. I’ve looked at videos, I’ve asked questions, I even got a private tutor to help but it seems as though it just wasn't meant for me.” The cracks in your voice was just the start, as another tear slid down your cheek.

“And if I fail this exam tomorrow then I won’t be able to continue on with the course which means I won’t get to get the job I’ve talked about since I was a teen.” Your voice was quiet and shaky, all the pain, stress, frustration, and fear plaguing you. It was difficult to take a breath and you felt the walls around you begin to swirl so you turned and leaned against JJ with your eyes tightly shut. You didn’t want to go into an attack right now. Now was really not a good time. Or maybe it was and you were just afraid of seeming weak.

When JJ cupped your face and brought his lips to your own, you hesitated to kiss back, your lungs already screaming for air. To your own surprise though, the kiss allowed you to take a deep gasp of fresh air when you both pulled back.

J held you close, using one hand to wipe your tears away and the other to write ‘I love you’ on your warm soaked skin.

“Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.” He answered, his eyes glancing back down to your lips.

“That isn’t the issue because I do want to do good so I can-” You started, a shaky breath leaving your lips that he was eyeing like a starving man.

“No.” He started firmly but coolly.

“You desire the job, not the class.” With that, you stopped, staring at him with wide eyes before looking down with furrowed brows. It was no lie you disliked algebra… but could you dislike it so much that you just weren’t giving it a chance?

“There's my beautiful smart *ss.” J exclaimed with a wide smile and relieved eyes. He hated when you cried and he was determined. He was determined to catch every tear and be there for every breakdown so that you never had to suffer alone. He was determined to make you smile… to show just how much you meant to him. And he’s accomplished just that with the small victory of hearing your beautiful laughter and the playful shove to his chest.

“You’re a dork.” You smiled, gleaming with new found determination and something else he couldn’t quite place. Love? Appreciation? Relief? Maybe even a little of all of them.

Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better. - Maya Angelou.

Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in. - Leonardo da Vinci.

[painfulrant]

Part Two: His Arrival

JJ Maybank x Reader

Fluff

Part Two: His Arrival

The dress was beautiful and showed all the right curves. It was a sapphire blue dress that had a v-cut chest, showing just enough cleavage, and lace in the back. A slit ran up the side of the flowy dress and it hugged your body, leaving little curves to the imagination. Yet with all the beautiful things on the dress, your mind just wouldn’t let you be happy with the way you looked. Something was just off.

Sighing, you placed the tan cowgirl hat on your beautiful shiny hair and watched as the turquoise blue crystal connected to the hat made your eyes pop. There were tassels on the hat too but they laid in the back, unnoticeable to anyone unless they searched for them. You had on a pair of light brown and blue cowgirl boots, the boots hugging your legs to make the fit seem more nostalgic.

Even so, you couldn’t find it in you to be happy or proud with the fit. You were about to take the hat off when you heard shouting in the distance, dragging your attention to the outside world. The party had started about twenty minutes ago and anxiety has kept you inside the room. When another shout and a bang was heard, you finally made your way to the door, hesitantly and quietly creaking it open.

Nothing seemed out of the ordinary so you took a step into the hallway but immediately went flying. A sharp pain jolted through your side before a dull ache settled in your tailbone. Muttering a curse, you began to rub your side, just realizing everything was now dark. It was your hat that had fallen over your eyes and you were terrified to take it off in case anybody was looking.

When the feeling of your hat being removed shocked you out of your embarrassment, your breath caught in your throat. In front of you stood the one and only mystery boy with the sandy soft hair. Before you had time to truly study him, a hand wrapped around yours and you were hauled off your feet and into a closet, chest to chest with the mystery boy.

“J, what is go-” You started before his hand covered your mouth, probably smearing the lipstick you had spent twenty minutes on. Shaking hands was a serious issue in the makeup field. You soon heard Rafe and what sounded like Kelce shouting to one another. After several minutes of them searching the room, thankfully not opening the small door that led to them, JJ’s hand eased away from your mouth.

“Hey, pretty girl.” This man was everything you’ve ever wanted wrapped in a black and white tux. A few bruises sported his cheek that you were soon gently tracing before you found his gorgeous ocean blue eyes that shined with many emotions.

“Hello, mystery boy.” You hummed, a soft smile gracing your lips.

“We still on for a slow dance?” He asked, one eyebrow raising with a cocky grin.

“Hmm… considering I didn’t know we were on for the first one… I’ll have to generously accept your invitation.” The soft giggle that escaped your chest felt so foreign that it even shocked your own ears. Never in your wildest dreams would you imagine being held between a wall and a handsome devil's chest, one you’ve only met a handful of times, giggling like a love sick school girl.

Yet here you stood, doing the exact thing you thought impossible with a boy you still don’t know much about. Only his name and that he was a part of the main pogue group. The one your best friend had love hate relations with.

“So… I have a message to deliver to the Kook queen, would you like to accompany me on my undercover adventure?” He asked, swirling a strand of hair that fell over my shoulder around his finger.

“Why, I wouldn’t want to get shot in a duel… but I suppose an adventure would be pretty fun.” You mock in a very breathy voice. This boy had no idea what he did to you and you loved it.

“Then on we go, my dearest.” He whispered, brushing a soft swift kiss to your cheek before you both snuck your way onto the dance floor. You blended with the crowd very well whereas JJ did not. So when he slipped away from you and moved towards Sierra, you couldn’t help but feel a small part of you feel disappointed from his lack of warmth.

It didn’t take long though before he stood in front of you, dancing from side to side with a goofy face. For the first time in a long while, your true laugh joined many others at the party. Maybe it was worth everything after all.

“You’re coming with us. Meet me over there in ten minutes.” He hummed, pointing to a spot in the distance where the lights didn’t quite touch. Not even a second later, you spotted the three princes of Kook town: Kelce, Topper, and Rafe.

“I’ll see you soon, my dearest.” He called out, having backed away slowly before disappearing in the crowd. In your hand lay a small flower that you guess he had picked and in your heart laid a swarming warmth that threatened to engulf your whole being. You were most definitely meeting him in y’alls secret spot in ten minutes. Those ten minutes couldn’t pass soon enough.

[painfulrant]

Part One: Mystery Man

JJ Maybank x Reader

Fluff

Part One: Mystery Man

For the fourth time today, your best friend, Sierra Cameron, pegged you about the Mid Summer party. Neither of you really wanted to go but seeing as how you lived in the middle of the Kooks and Pogues and just happened to be best friends with Sierra Cameron, you were being dragged to the party against your will.

The issue wasn’t the party itself… rather getting dressed for the party and the people who would be there. You didn’t hate the Kooks like other pogues did and you didn’t hate the pogues like many Kooks did. You just couldn’t stand the snotty and wicked words and actions between the two groups.

“Come on, it’ll be fun!” Sierra smiled before her eyes grew big with her bottom lip puckering out. Her hands were together in front of her and you swear that if she had animal ears, they would be flat against her head.

“Sierra, love, I have nothing to wear.” You grumbled, turning to walk over to Heywards truck that just arrived.

“Plus, no one really likes me. I don’t fit in and many say I’m too boyish and quiet.” You mutter more to yourself with a small frown. The words that were often whispered by others were very hurtful. You would rather get punched in the face then hear another word said about your voice, body, or personality. All the same though, Sierra heard it and followed you to the truck that now had Heyward behind it and Pope in the bed of the truck, passing Heyward stuff.

“Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman.” Sierra all but chanted, disdain etched all over her face when an eye roll was all she received back.

“What about that mystery boy? Will he be there?” She asked, making you pause, a warmth slowly creeping from your neck up into your cheeks. How did she know? Did she know who it was? You turn with curious and slightly accusatory eyes before you see a little eavesdropper listening in on the conversation between the two of you. Pope was still passing things to his father but you could tell by his body language and by the way his eyes glanced over every few seconds that he was, in fact, listening. Choosing that it didn’t really matter, Pope not having known who they were talking about in the first place, you turned and scowled.

“I told you already. He doesn’t like these types of things. Plus I don’t have enough motivation, let alone inspiration to go all out for this party and that’s IF I’m even going to it.” Your voice held a tone of final, rolling your shoulders before turning. Pope still stared at you with wonder and you offered a soft smile before tilting your head ever so slightly.

“Need a hand?” The question was simple and sweet, the tone you took with anyone you didn’t know too well. The same one that trapped your bumblebee in the sickly sweet honey of yours.

“You know… inspiration is for amateurs. The rest of us just show up and get to work.” His words were sweet and you knew he had good intentions but there was also something lying just beneath his words. Almost like a double meaning. You stared for a few moments, letting your mind toss his words around before finally settling on having read too much into it.

“Alright, wise man. Let me help you and then I’ll go get ready.” The answer was sweet and teasing. Pope was a good boy. Not just yet a man but very close, as most of the other boys on the island were. Not to mention, he was brutally honest which you greatly appreciated. Not that you two talked much or even hung out.

“Yes ma’am.” And with that, you two worked on unloading until you finally left.

Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman. - Coco Chanel

Inspiration is for amateurs. The rest of us just show up and get to work. - Chuck Close