pahaadonkidhoop

[pahaadonkidhoop]

no because is this really a thing? that you're living on autopilot mode and at one point you do realise that you're on autopilot mode but still can't get out of it? you just continue the same way, knowingly, yet helpless?

[pahaadonkidhoop]

and when siddhant chaturvedi said "mere liye na itne shor mein wo shaanti hai."

when dr. derek shepherd said "you were like coming up for fresh air. it's like i was drowning and you saved me." and when andrew garfield said "she was like a shot of espresso. she's like being bathed in sunlight." and when park said "she looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

[pahaadonkidhoop]

it's so funny to be absolutely sloshed and walking alone around the college campus, crying, barely breathing, so funny

[pahaadonkidhoop]

i remember the navratri and pujo craze how every year i looked for new ways to style my lehengas for garba and new outfits for pujo and the pandal hopping and the dancing the night away with garba and bhai bhai and how this year because of a terrible ass college placement season (fuck this economy) i haven't seen a single pandal nor have i been able to garba for even one round and this just sucks so fucking much istfg

[pahaadonkidhoop]

it really is a whole different kind of heart-stabbing pain when your parents ask you about what happened to the people you talked non stop about and don't as much / at all anymore

[pahaadonkidhoop]

often i am upset

when the world was ending i'd hold you in my arms

walk with me for a while

you show me love and then spit in my face

rakhde ni gallan dil'ich

sochta hoon main har ek din ye

wo raat bewafa si aaj bhi hai yaad

feet don't fail me now

it's not easy having yourself a good time

you walked into the room and now my heart's been stolen

damn this took a very interesting turn very unprecedented but so real bhai, this is amazing

weirdly makes sense while also making none this is so perfect

put your Spotify on shuffle, and write down the first line of the first ten twenty songs. Post the poem that results.

thx for tagging me @thewitchofinysca <3

this is gonna be far from a poem lol had to go to yt cuz spotify was just ayo young money lol

in my heart there's a hole I wanna be king in your story early this morning I heard you're back in town I can't believe we're finally alone telling myself I won't go there I ain't a killa but don't push me cross my heart hope to die insane, inside, the danger gets me high We'll never get free, lamb to the slaughter

no pressure tags: @moonytoastandbowie @jaylienpotter

[pahaadonkidhoop]

i guess, i guess sunsets are a good enough to reason to keep going

i guess sunsets might just be worth it

i guess, i guess sunsets assure you that ends can be beautiful

i guess sunsets are a good enough reminder that the end is what leads to new beginnings

[pahaadonkidhoop]

it's so weird, when someone you used to be so close to once, and are now still in the same circle but just a little away, when they're telling some story that no one has heard before but you know it by heart, every single detail, you know what they'll say next. it's so weird, you can't really react to it can't really show you knew it all, that you know more of their stories than most, that you do know them more than they think you do and that is exactly why you fell for them but they can never know that, they can never know how you feel how you fell. it's so weird that all you can do is laugh really, just laugh. it's so weird that it's hilarious. it's so weird, isn't it?

[pahaadonkidhoop]

when dr. derek shepherd said "you were like coming up for fresh air. it's like i was drowning and you saved me." and when andrew garfield said "she was like a shot of espresso. she's like being bathed in sunlight." and when park said "she looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

[pahaadonkidhoop]

we both fucked you over but maybe we were closer and that's why it's worse for us? maybe that's why i get all the passive aggressive replies and she gets the late night random calls for no real reason? maybe that's why we are not as close anymore? maybe that's why you maybe don't really care anymore?

[pahaadonkidhoop]

bollywood in colors

[pahaadonkidhoop]

fuck it all in let it go tune

[pahaadonkidhoop]

toh baat zara kuchh aisi si hai, wo mere bagal mein baithi hai

when when when god when T_T

[pahaadonkidhoop]

bas maut ka intezaar

intehaan ho gayi, intezaar ki, aayi na kuchh khabar, meri maut ki, ye humein hain yakeen, bewafa wo nahin, phir wajah kya hui, intezaar ki

[pahaadonkidhoop]

you never really move on from a broken friendship, do you?

you find them or references of/to them in every little thing around you, in every other person you meet; they never really leave your mind, do they?

a broken friendship leaves fragments in your heart and stays there so the heart sort of grows around the stabs, never completely really, and you're just left with that constant hurt, a stabbing ache, and that's all there's left of it.

add to it that you're the person who fucked it all up, multiple times, and that now it may just really all be over, and the realisation that maybe now there really is nothing left to be done.

you realise that all the memories that you cherish, that are soo amazing for you, maybe they really weren't anything for them, that maybe they never really had fun with you thecway you did, that maybe they never felt the amount of comfort and trust around you that you did around them.

[pahaadonkidhoop]

"Itni shiddat se tumhein paane ki koshish ki hai, ki har zarre ne mujhe tumse milaane ki saazish ki hai."

Om Prakash Makhija, Om Shanti Om (2007)

Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

[pahaadonkidhoop]

ye mera maut ke kuen tak aa hi gaye hain toh zara chhalaang maar ke bhi dekh hi lete hain ki kya nateeja rehta zyaada se zyaada ky hi ho jaaega thought process hi mujhe kisi din marwaaega (happy)