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If Megumi had died during Shinjuku arc the first face he would have seen in his airport-like scene would be Tsumiki's.

I imagine him just standing there — not being able to express any feelings he has, not being able to move, to cry even. And I imagine Tsumiki embracing him before he can do any of that.

"I'm sorry, Tsumiki" is dull and weightless, more quiet than he ever imagined. But it's the first one of many. And each is long overdue.

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I just saw The Summer Hikaru Died Satosugu art and I can't stop thinking about TSHD Itafushi art that would be so good.

Especially considering some shared themes and the fact that Yoshiki and Megumi have a lot in common — both are pretty reserved, both have a lot of repressed feelings, both were called intelligent by other characters, both are presumably queer, both can do something that requires a lot of grim bravery when they're desperate. I would even say that they'd understand each other really well. While Yuuji and Hikaru both have energetic personalities, they both care for their friends and both seem to try to make the most out of what they're dealt in life.

//TSHD spoilers Both Megumi and Yoshiki saw their friends dead and both Yuuji and Hikaru dedicated some of their final thoughts and words to them in a tender heartbreaking moment. //TSHD spoilers end

There're obviously more differences that the similarities and I'm not trying to compare anything. My brain is wired to see connections between things that are not connected at all so please consider this as nothing but a funny post.

Having that said I would really love to see Yoshiki and Hikaru in Megumi and Yuuji's school uniforms. Mince-meat should be one of the shikigami obviously.

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Underrated JJK moment when Mahito had the guts to tell Sukuna to shut up and watch him kill Itadori.

I also think that Mahito is, in a way, a great example of a clever plot device — one of many in this manga. He's often there to make characters reflect on themselves, especially Yuuji, but since he's a curse that stems from people's worst traits it simply fits there.

To me a plot device is like a tear in the story where you can see the writer's hand between the seams. If you take that metaphor further it becomes even funnier to think about Mahito who has stitches on his face.

Oh Mahito you were a top tier villain. I will always lovehate you for as long as I live.

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Gojo taught Mahito that 0.2 seconds domain expansion trick and people keep saying he's a bad teacher. Put some respect on goat's name

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Because Sukuna took that finger with force intent to harm. Yuji Chose which finger to sacrifice with love to save.

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I hate it here I hate it here I hate it here I hate it here I hate it here

I have nothing against Ozawa. She's a sweet girl and I thought that episode in the café was fine. But I selfishly want my itafushi agenda to thrive.

I really liked how itafushi were handled in the end of the manga — their path together as characters, their fate that was always intertwined through Sukuna and them being friends who give each other something they both lack. Sometimes it's an understanding that you are not alone, sometimes it's a tiny memory in a form of words that you cherish and sometimes it's a purpose in life when you need one and the strength to keep going. I never needed any romantic relationship to be implied but such bond only lives between characters that are focused on each other. And now it's going to be ruined by that stupid fucking epilogue.

Please let me keep them. They are important to me.

I fucking hate it here.

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My favourite type of itafushi art is when Megumi's giving Yuuji a piggyback even though Yuuji weighs way more than him. Those 2cm are doing wonders.

If you're an artist and you're drawing them like this just know that your art makes at least one person incredibly happy.

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JJK ended and we still don't know what that is

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All it took was a reference to someone's words and one "hmph" facial expression and this was how itafushi became THE ship to me

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The Summer Hikaru Died concept AU

The Summer Hikaru Died AU where Suguru and Satoru are high schoolers who live in a remote mountain village. They've been best friends for their whole lives so they know each other better than anyone else. But one day Suguru comes back from a hike and there's something different about him — something Saturu can't figure out because he looks the same and he talks the same, and he likes the same stuff as before. Even the way he bites his ice cream and pretends it's not too cold or the way he counts birds when they walk home from school hasn't changed. Except Suguru doesn't agree to take a shorter route through the shrine grounds anymore and the local white cat they jokingly call Catoru hisses at him.

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A recent development

SaShiSu reference in Evangelion omg

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I can't shut up about this because Gojo almost literally carpe diemed his students

JJK Dead Poets Society AU would be so good but I can't bring myself to think about it for too long. I just can't do this to my JJK kids. They've had enough.

Jujutsu High Students Ranking sends me

Gojo's teaching style literally

HC: Megumi's the exception because he either read willingly or he's one of the students that barely study but still get good grades and he was listening to Gojo for years. Or, what's more realistic, some of both.

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Jujutsu High Students Ranking sends me

Gojo's teaching style literally

HC: Megumi's the exception because he either read willingly or he's one of the students that barely study but still get good grades and he was listening to Gojo for years. Or, what's more realistic, some of both.

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I don't like "Yuuji is dumb" take because he's not it sort of derives from the episodes that, I believe, are meant to depict something else.

I can think of a few but this one stuck with me I guess. In chapter 12 Gojo explains the connection between cursed energy and cursed techniques to Yuuji but Yuuji says that he doesn't understand it and then assumes he's in Jujutsu Tech to learn some cool technique.

Which was a reasonable assumption if you ask me considering it was explained to him like this.

I think manga did a great job at showing how someone who has no prior knowledge of jujutsu is taught by a person who was born into this world and built his sense of self on being a jujutsu sorcerer.

If I was the one to explain the basics of jujutsu to anyone I'd use a totally different approach but that's because I learned these things from the manga myself and I know what actually helped me to understand them. Gojo on the other hand learned jujutsu like kids learn to talk.

For Yuuji it's like studying a foreign language at the age of 15 — he barely knows the alphabet and for some reason no words that his teacher reads out loud correspond to the way they're written. But once the basics are there he proves to be a perfectly capable student. He's just not afraid to admit that he doesn't understand something and often assumes it's because he's not a very bright person.

Although Yuuji's self perception is a whole different topic and I want to cover that part later.

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Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind AU where Suguru erases Satoru from his memory and then Satoru does the same out of spite

But unlike in the movie they’re not meeting each other for the next ten years after that. Till one day someone leaks the files that were kept in the archive by the company that provides the service.

It’s been ten years already. Satoru touches an old ink on paper that forms a date like it's supposed to make everything feel more real. These memories are older than some of his students. He barely even remembers what kind of a person he was back then. All that’s left from his early twenties is a faint feeling of absence — as if he was missing a place that never existed.

Turns out it was a person.

«Do I just tell you everything I think about?» his own voice on the tape asks. «Anything? That’ll help to perform the procedure, right?»

He doesn’t remember this conversation.

He doesn't remember going to that clinic at all.

He goes through the tapes listening to himself — funnily familiar, — his words are almost petty sometimes.

«Suguru never wants to watch the movies I want,» the voice on the tape says. «He complains that I’m being repetitive. I’ve been watching a lot of new stuff lately, you know. I’ve watched ten new movies for the pas…»

His finger skips to another timestamp marked on the list.

«A Chinese restaurant».

«I asked him out that day. I wanted to go to that new Chinese place because I wanted us to feel like a couple again,» the voice says. «It's been a while since we went out together. Yeah, I've been busy, but he’s always in the wrong mood when it comes to anything I suggest. How is that my fault now?»

Does it still matter? That Chinese place he was talking about was closed eight years ago — redesigned to be a convenience store or something like that — now it probably belongs to some retail chain with all doors indistinguishable from one another. He’s moved two times since then.

And another one.

«He’s always sulky, you see. Even after sex lately. I can picture that… Ugh, I can picture that face he does. Right now, I can do it. And he always says he’s fine like I'm supposed to guess what might make him happy. And I never can. Can you get it erased first so that I don’t have to think about it anytime I close my eyes? Can you do it first?»

«This procedure is done in one go,» the doctor answers. «No particular order. Please, continue».

He does.

«He said I can’t change and he doesn’t want to force me. Well, I’m sorry I don’t like to let go of the things that I love. Is that worse than not being able to commit to anything even when it’s hard?»

«I hope he’d be happy if he knew I'm doing this. That's certainly a change, right?»

And another one.

«He never tells me anything», the voice on the tape says. «Not even when I ask. It’s like I know something’s not right but I can’t get an answer out of him. Or I can't formulate the right question, he'd like to answer. It fries my brain.»

«The other day he said we don’t see eye to eye anymore. Why can’t he just talk to me? Why couldn’t he talk to me till it was too late?»

And another.

«Is he punishing me for something I can’t understand?»

The room falls silent. Dead — haunted by the memories. Do they still belong to him or have they turned into ghosts by now? Separate beings with their own mind and will.

He caresses a postcard from Okinawa — unfamiliar handwriting and a ripped edge, he almost feels a salty wind on his tongue, — an old monster figurine, a plain white t-shirt that belonged to Suguru. And the pictures.

They’re so happy in all of them. But the voice on the tape keeps repeating.

«He got me eased. He got me fucking erased. He got me erased.»

Why the fuck did he do that?

Mad at the person he doesn’t even know. Like it’s the only thing that matters in the world right now. Like nothing's happened after that in his life. No new apartments, no new jobs, no new vacations, no new boyfriends.

He’s been through a few relationships in the past ten years but none hurt enough to even consider anything like that.

Because he never loved them.

Because he still loved someone else.

At least now he knows why his life felt empty when he woke up alone in that crammed apartment that somehow felt too big. And why it felt so lonely ever since.

He goes through the files — none of the records contain an address or a phone number. Or an answer to the question on his mind.

What if Suguru is happy with the procedure? What if the words — falling out of his own mouth out of spite — were true.

A call wakes him up on a Saturday morning.

«Hello, Satoru-u,» there’s a smile in that man’s voice he can hear. «I mean… Sorry if it’s too… Sorry. I don’t know if you’re a morning person or a night person.»

He gulps.

That’s him that’s him that is

thatisSuguruthatisSuguruthatisSuguruSuguru from the postcards who bought him figurines as a gift

Suguru who didn’t want to go to a place that doesn’t exist anymore

Suguru who didn’t want to tell him anything

who thought he can’t change or adjust to the changes — yet they’re both still caught

shit

SuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguruSuguru

it's him

«Uh, I got…» he coughs. «I went to bed late last night.»

«Did you get the files?»

«Yes, I…» he laughs. «We were a shitty couple, weren’t we?»

And then Suguru laughs too.

A laughs that feels like a first sound of thunder after the drought — like those memories are dried flowers everyone thought were dead till the rain came.

«You’re with anyone right now?» Suguru asks.

«No,» answer’s too fast but he takes a pause before he says: «What about you?»

«No, not really. It’s not serious I guess.»

Satoru smirks.

«Not enough to get them erased from your memory, right?»

A joke doesn’t land as well as he expected. For a moment he almost believes Suguru’s going to hang up on him.

But still he continues.

«I don’t know…» he says. «I don’t know if I should apologise for something I can’t remember but I feel really sorry.»

«I don’t know if I can forgive something I can’t remember.»

Another pause.

Should he — if there’s nothing that holds these memories anymore. It’s like someone dug out a time capsule you hid under an oak tree when you were a child. All those names and events in your notes that were so important. Yet you don’t even remember half of the names.

It still hurts though.

«Yeah, I guess,» Suguru sighs. «I think there’s a bright side to it. We’re older now so we won’t repeat the same mistakes.»

«You think?»

«That's how it's supposed to be when you're getting mature.»

«Hm-m,» Satoru smiles. «I don't know about that actually. We're more experienced now. So we can always use that knowledge to make things worse.»

Sharing another laugh that’s warmer and more familiar like his brain is riddled with the scars that started itching all at once.

They used to laugh a lot, it strikes him.

They used to tease each other, they used to kiss and make love. He used to remember that person’s voice and face better than his own.

Why did he let go of that?

Why didn’t he let it heal and warm him? Because somehow he still knows that guy — he knows what'll make him laugh and he's sure they even talk similarly sometimes, using the same words and phrases.

Why did he let it go?

«Wanna meet?» Suguru asks.

«Do you?»

«Yeah. At least we’ll find out if we're the biggest idiots in the whole world or not.»

«I know I am,» Satoru nods as if they're in the same room and all of a sudden he realises that he doesn't want this conversation to end. «Besides, I think the company’s going to get sued after the incident. There're plenty of other idiots who would want some compensation from them. Which means we’re not getting another chance to chop our brains again. Do you think we can get some money though? I could use a new car. Or a fridge. Probably a vacuum cleaner would do. That's the mature stuff, right?»

A laugh that could belong to a couple of teens — head over heels in love — something he thought he never experienced.

Turns out he did.

And there’s still time.

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Watching Evangelion is like going through "Origins of iconic images" page. Because why have I already seen all of that?

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Toji discourse got interesting when someone compared Toji leaving Megumi and Suguru leaving Satoru while saying that fandom holds one accountable but tries to understand and forgive the other.

I think it's actually valid to compare Suguru and Toji as characters because they're both traumatised by the same system. Which becomes even more interesting if you think about how different they are in terms of their values and blessings — Suguru who's a special grade sorcerer with his strong ideals and Toji who was perceived as an inferior person by his own family and who doesn't give much shit about morals anymore.

Toji's inability to hold on to his new life outside of jujutsu society and take care of Megumi highlights the issues of the outdated clan system really well. And I think it's one of the most normal (not magical I mean) aspects of JJK. Toji was unable to break the never ending cycle of curses where parents traumatise their kids because they were themselves traumatised. So he left Megumi with his own set of issues that Megumi wasn't able to resolve because he couldn't bond with adults in his life properly.

Megumi wasn't taught how, to be more specific. Even Gojo who either was his parental figure or at least could've been one was raised by the same system where his own relationships with adults were shaped by his strength and not by any form of parental affection. No matter how much affection Gojo himself developed for Megumi after that their relationship still started with a pact that tied Megumi to something he didn't choose.

But I can't understand how Suguru and Toji's situations could be compared in terms of accountability. Breaking up with your peer is, dare I say, a bit different from leaving your kid who's dependant on you and selling them to a clan. Suguru was trying to break the curse from the outside and eventually failed and Toji failed from the start by not even trying.

I hate this frame I can't even begin to explain it because it doesn't make any sense for him to forget his kid's name. Like ???

If I was about to go into headcanon territory I'd say that Megumi laughing at Gojo's letter means he was trying to make his peace with everything that happened. Megumi realised that since he actually wants to live he should try and overcome these issues that has influenced him for his whole life. Maybe Gojo wasn't his parent and Gojo himself was a part of the old system in a way but it wasn't all about his technique or Gojo's plans.

I guess eventually it was Yuuji Itadori who broke even Fushiguro's family curse.