newyorkcitywater
newyorkcitywater
youre all just jealous of my cursed amulet
173K posts
margo, she/her, i can't drive
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newyorkcitywater · 6 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 6 hours ago
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At work there used to be a sign on a few things that would say like "if this bubbles, run for your life" and "if you hear thumping run for cover" and "bears can and will kill you" and really in general I wish the park service was more willing to say "you are not at home, you are not at disneyland, you can die here and you can die so badly your family will have to bury an empty casket because no one will risk their own life to collect your idiot corpse."
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newyorkcitywater · 7 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 7 hours ago
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People who think sheep are killed for their wool are so hilarious to me. Does your barber slit your throat whenever you get a haircut?? Are you a returning customer to Sweeney Todd? Lmao it grows back, fools.
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newyorkcitywater · 7 hours ago
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scottish tap water i love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
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newyorkcitywater · 7 hours ago
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in tears rn
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newyorkcitywater · 8 hours ago
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you know what if everyone REALLY hated me that much they'd kill me
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newyorkcitywater · 9 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 9 hours ago
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everyone younger than me is having a baby and everyone older than me has 3+ roommates and everyone the same age as me fell down a biiiiiiiiiiig flight of stairs
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newyorkcitywater · 9 hours ago
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Thought you might appreciate this decoration I saw at a cafè one time
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newyorkcitywater · 9 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 9 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 10 hours ago
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the name "theresa" is so funny like. theres a what
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newyorkcitywater · 10 hours ago
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Shout out to the little girl at my store today who had a shirt that said "skeleton mouse" and she was carrying around a plushie of a rat, had hair clips in her hair that had rats on them, and a necklace with a rodent skull on it.
As I was checking her mother out at the register she pulled out a handful of rubber rats from her pocket and put them on my counter, to which her mother sighed and said "no sweetie, he doesn't need rats" to which I just looked at her like this
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newyorkcitywater · 10 hours ago
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newyorkcitywater · 10 hours ago
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puppy play but i’m some sort of endangered wolf who is sick and injured so a team of medical experts work around the clock to diagnose and fix me and they feed me an ideal diet and post photos of me on social media and everyone says “ooohhh awwwwwwww!!!!” and then i get released back to the wild because it’s the right thing to do and from then on i only occasionally show up on random trail cams and people say “yay!” and they leave me alone
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newyorkcitywater · 10 hours ago
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Deinonychus Takedown for animation practice
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