miraclemuncher

[miraclemuncher]

do I work on writing my three ongoing fanfics or do I write my four college app essays???? decisions, decisions…

[miraclemuncher]

phantasm

000. grabbed my hand and made it very clear there’s absolutely nothing for us here ─ೄྀ࿐જ⁀➴

— series masterlist

summary. Remus Lupin is under the assumption Snape is a drug dealer and his biggest customer is Jubilation Delight

pairing. remus lupin x fem!ravenclaw!vampire!oc

genre. romance, idiots to lovers, lighthearted

tags/warnings. marauders era, vampires, remus is a dumbass, and a bitchass, probably ooc, drug addiction mentioned but no actual drugs used + more as updating

status. ongoing

taglist. open! comment on this post to be added or send an ask!!

crossposted on wattpad

jubilation 'billie' delight ━━ .. ཻུ۪𒈔ཻུ۪۪2🦇 ᬼ 𝓑🕰️

remus john lupin ━━ .. ཻུ۪𒈔ཻུ۪۪2🦢 ᬼ 𝓡🕯️

featuring. pandora lovegood, junius campbell (oc), regulus black, lily evans, sirius black, james potter, peter pettigrew, severus snape

one + two + three + four + five + six + seven + eight + nine + ten

soundtrack! (tba as updated)

000. secret door - arctic monkeys

001. so high - doja cat

002.  do i wanna know? - arctic monkeys

003. complicated - avril lavigne

004. apple - charlie xcx

005. dance little liar - arctic monkeys

006. crybaby - the neighborhood

007. tom’s diner - suzanne vega, dna

008. greek tragedy - the wombats

009. big mouth strikes again - the smiths

[miraclemuncher]

phantasm

009. sweetness, i was only joking

remus lupin જ⁀➴ fem!vampire!oc

summary. Remus Lupin is under the assumption Snape is a drug dealer and his biggest customer is Jubilation Delight

tags/warning. marauders era

notes. sorry for being gone lol #busybee

series masterlist → previous → 10.

To the fault of Remus Lupin, himself and all his friends were woken up at the crack of dawn. A small but obnoxious finch was relentlessly pecking on their dormitory window with determination that outweighed its size. Clutched in the finch’s beak was a small scroll of parchment.

James was the first to break. With a groan, he furiously leapt out of bed and flung the window open. In an instant, the little finch zoomed into the room, darting over their heads until finally dropping the scroll on Remus.

That was the last straw for Remus. He had been trying to ignore the commotion until then, savoring the little sleep he could salvage after the test RISSK put him through kept him up late. Who the hell sends a message, by finch, directly to his bedside? There’s already a perfectly fine system of deliveries being made over breakfast.

Remus sat up with a scowl and roughly tore off the red ribbon tied around the scroll.

Peter voiced what they were all thinking. “This better be good,” he groaned with a slight curiosity.

Remus unrolled it. A simple message was inscribed on the parchment.

I got you in. 100 galleons. x J.D.

He blinked. Right. Remus sort of forgot about his end of the deal. He was only bluffing because he was absolutely sure Delight had also been bluffing!

“Well?” James eagerly asked. “What’s it say?”

“Yeah, what's so important that the sender couldn’t wait until breakfast?” Sirius added bitterly.

Remus used the age old excuse. “My gran’s sick,” he mumbled, crumpling the parchment in his hands and shoving it into his pocket. Remus hadn’t used that one since first year, before they knew about his lycanthropy.

The mood abruptly turned grim. They returned awkward half-asleep condolences, and quickly changed the subject. Since they were all already up, they got dressed and headed down for breakfast.

Remus was relieved none of them caught on. He knew if it wasn’t so early in the morning, they would have clocked his lie instantly. It won’t hold up for long, but at least buys him some time to come up with something better.

The four boys were the first few students to arrive at breakfast. Remus noticed Delight wasn’t among them. Apparently she had the time to send her bloody finch up to his dorm but couldn’t be bothered to have an early breakfast herself.

However, as breakfast dragged on, Delight never showed up. Remus kept on glancing his heavy eyelids back to Ravenclaw table. Remus shouldn’t be surprised. She never really makes it to breakfast these days, and if she does, she ends up slumping over her meal, somehow asleep amidst the morning ruckus.

Remus found himself doing the same thing, nodding off over his plate and jerking his head upwards right before it could crash into the breakfast bagel he’s barely touched. Had his friends paid a little more attention, they’d have noticed Lily was in the same rough shape.

But Remus had more problems than lack of sleep. He owed Delight a hundred galleons.

After sluggishly forcing down a few more bites of his bagel, he worked up the energy to say, “Fourth year. Christmas party.”

His three friends stiffened. They hated whenever Remus did this. Randomly, he’ll call back to a party, one where James or Sirius (and sometimes Peter) drunkenly made a stupid bet that always results in Remus draining their wallets. They despised his ridiculously impressive memory more than their drunk minds.

“Sirius said he’d give 50 galleons to each of us if he doesn't have a serious girlfriend by sixth year,” Remus said. He was leaving out a few fuzzy details, but was sure no one would remember them. So far, they’ve never thought to doubt Remus.

James let out a relieved sigh, for once it wasn’t his drunken words being used against him. Peter beamed at the fact he’s getting handed money seemingly for no reason, again.

Sirius swore under his breath as he reached into his bookbag, pulling out a heavy drawstring pouch. He couldn’t bother himself to count the galleons, just lazily tossing the pouch to Remus.

Remus caught it with a smug grin, took his share, then passed the pouch to Peter. Peter clumsily rummaged through it, clinking sickles and knuts against each other as Remus drafted ways to come up with another 50 galleons before Delight could start hassling him.

Then the clinking stopped.

“Wait,” Peter said, pausing while still elbow deep in the pouch. “Wasn’t it the other way round? Sirius bet that the first one of us to get a serious girlfriend got fifty galleons from everyone else.” As the rest of his friends froze, Peter resumed counting up the galleons.

Sirius’ face lit up, his defeated frown flipped into a delighted grin. “You are absolutely right, Peter,” he said, possibly for the first time in his life.

Remus had to play it off. “I could’ve sworn it was the other way around,” he said with a sheepish shrug.

Sirius leaned over, taking back his galleons from a confused Peter. Remus had no choice but to return the galleons back to Sirius.

“Memory slipping, Moony?” James teased. “Maybe this time I’ll beat you in potions.”

Remus didn’t answer, too busy working out a new strategy to get Delight her hundred galleons.

𝓑

Word spreads fast in Ravenclaw Tower. By morning, every single blue and bronze student had heard about Remus Lupin’s recruitment into RISSK, and by extension, so did the few Non-Ravenclaws. Billie lost count of how many times she was stopped in the corridors, already running late enough for class.

Billie finally arrived at her first lesson, Herbology, with only fifteen minutes left. She lowered her head to avoid Professor Sprout’s disappointed gaze as she scurried to an available seat.

“Ten points from Ravenclaw,” Sprout curtly said, then continued with the lesson about valerian bushes that Billie had interrupted.

It was just her luck that the only empty seat was next to Severus Snape. Nobody ever wants to sit next to that grouch.

Billie deliberately scooted her chair as far away as possible from him. She intended to keep their interactions strictly limited to their deal.

Despite this, Snape scooted his chair closer.

He didn’t look at her as he whispered, “Is it true? Did Lupin go through the recruitment ceremony last night?”

Billie stifled a sigh. Her roommates had disturbed her sleep five times already asking the same questions. Without looking at him, she murmured, “I’m trying to catch up,” as she hurriedly copied notes from the chalkboard.

Snape kept on prying. “Lupin seemed exhausted over breakfast,” he said, further confirming how obsessed he is with Potter and his friends. While sneering, he added, “It’s not even his time of the month.”

That made Billie pause her quill. She turned to face him. “You know about Lupin?”

“You know about Lupin?” Snape repeated in the same surprised tone.

“…Somewhat.” But what exactly did Billie know about him? Considering she came to the conclusion he was born a female while sleep deprived and soaking wet, Billie isn’t sure she can trust her judgement.

Snape’s shoulders relaxed a little. “Finallly someone else has noticed how much of a freak he is.”

Billie was taken aback, her jaw went slack at the venom in his voice. “I mean, I wouldn’t say he’s a freak—“

Snape’s glare sharpened at her response. “Don’t you think he should be kicked out?”

She was fully caught off guard now, jerking around to face him properly. “What? No! He’s just like you.”

He looked genuinely offended, scowl deepening. “Don’t you dare compare me to him.”

She sighed, knowing trying to reason with people like Snape is impossible. “You’re being unbelievable, Snape,” Billie muttered under her breath. She turned back around and tried focusing on the notes she missed.

But he wasn’t finished. “You’re just like the rest of them, protecting a dangerous beast,” Snape pressed on.

“You’re a bigger bigot than I thought, Snape,” Billie gripped her quill tighter. “There is nothing wrong with Lupin just because he wasn’t born a boy.”

His scowl fell into confusion. “Wait…” Snape stilled.

A silence hung between them, shorter than Billie had hoped.

Then Snape bursted into a mirthful cackle. The entire greenhouse went silent as he doubled over in his seat, everyone took in the rare sight of Severus Snape smiling. “You think—“ He broke off into another fit of laughter again, the sound was like nails on a chalkboard. “Merlin, you’re dafter than everyone thinks.”

“Mister Snape,” Professor Sprout’s heated voice boomed, but it did not stop his laughter. “Unless you’d like to share with everyone why Miss Delight is daft, I’d advise you to calm yourself. Five points from Slytherin.”

Snape wasn’t the least phased at losing house points, instead he looked pleased with himself. He couldn’t stop laughing, earning himself a detention.

With only a few minutes left in class, Professor Sprout couldn’t contain everyone from whispering among themselves. Billie felt her face grow warm as a couple heads turned, unsure whether they were talking about her or at Snape’s outburst. Her mind scrambled to make sense of what just happened.

Billie at least realized her and Snape were having two different conversations. What did he think they were talking about? Had Billie misunderstood Lupin’s situation? The more she thought about it, the less any of it made sense.

taglist. (join by commenting on the series masterlist linked above!) @daydreamandforget

[miraclemuncher]

I saw someone on TikTok say James Gunn uses the teen girl fanfic writer strategy to write his movies (make playlist, write script based on it) and he’s actually so real for that. I’ve built the entirety of my main Remus lupin fic on a single arctic monkeys lyric and just been having the chapters build up to it.

Anyways all hail Superman 2025

[miraclemuncher]

Being outside is nice and all but man do I miss being chronically online like a mfer

[miraclemuncher]

once this bumass draining stem internship ends i PROMISE I’ll update weekend at remus’s and phantasm 🙏🙏🙏

[miraclemuncher]

i might start uploading fics less cause I’ve got a 🥁🥁🥁🥁 SUMMER INTERNSHIP

[miraclemuncher]

I want to write a loud and annoying and insufferable reader because I felt myself being loud and annoying and insufferable today but every time I try writing her I just cringe sm even tho it’s literally me

[miraclemuncher]

I finally put down the ao3 and valorant, and sat down to watch a movie

[miraclemuncher]

Weekend at Remus’!

summary. Over summer holiday, James, Sirius, and Peter spend a weekend at Remus’ small, muggle populated village. For their Moony’s sake, they dedicate themselves to spend the entire weekend undercover as muggles. Especially when it comes to his cute neighbor. Will they be able to keep up the act all weekend long?

pairing. remus lupin x fem!reader

tags/warnings. marauders era, welsh!remus, fluff, crack, american author (im sorry), they’re all 17+ and can use magic idc, no use of y/n, miniseries!!

taglist. comment on this post to be apart of the taglist!

i. prologue

ii. sirius slips up | day one, saturday morning

iii. james jinxes himself | day one, saturday night

iv. peter panics | day two, sunday morning

v. remus regrets nothing | day two, sunday night

[miraclemuncher]

iii. james jinxes himself | day 1, Saturday night

summary. Over summer holiday, James, Sirius, and Peter spend a weekend at Remus’ small, muggle populated village. For their Moony’s sake, they dedicate themselves to spend the entire weekend undercover as muggles. Especially when it comes to his cute neighbor. Will they be able to keep up the act all weekend long?

pairing. remus lupin x fem!reader

taglist status. open!! comment on the miniseries masterlist to be added!

notes. not beta read at all

James somehow outdoes Sirius in terms of borderline violating the statue of secrecy.

Backtracking, their evening actually plays out pretty ordinaryly considering their chaotic midday adventures. There’s no need to fuss over Cerise’s demand for beer since Remus’ mother has got them covered. Mrs. Lupin isn’t exactly aware they’re nicking a keg of beer, but what she doesn’t know can’t hurt her.

For a while, they play outside, as childish as it sounds, but there’s no better word fitted to describe four boys frolicking in the meadow that surrounds the neighborhood. Mrs. Lupin has a meal prepared for them by the time they return to his home in the evening.

Once she’s out of earshot, James leans over and asks in a hushed voice, “How’re we going about with pinching an entire keg of beer?”

None of them particularly feels good about stealing from Remus’ mother. Strangely, Remus is the least bothered about it, putting the others even more on edge about the entire thing. They had plenty of experience sneaking and scheming in Hogwarts, but something about plotting against his mum gives them a guilty conscience before they’ve even begun.

Remus nonchalantly dusts the toast crumbs from his hands. “She’ll be asleep by the time we leave. Her shop’s in the town, I’ve got the spare key,” he explains as he licks his fingers, like it’s another one of their standard pranks and not robbing his own blood.

It’s still fairly early into the night, just a little past 6:30. The others were under the impression they’d have started heading to the party by now.

“By the time your mum’s asleep, the party’ll have ended,” Sirius complains with a pout.

“Nah,” Remus shakes his head, unfazed. “It’ll still be too early by then.”

James squints at him. “Is this your ploy to make us miss the party entirely?

“Trust me,” Remus replies. “If we leave now, we’ll be ridiculously early. Cerise’s parties don’t usually start until midnight.”

“Starts at midnight?” Peter repeats incredulously.

They have no choice but to trust Remus’ words. It’s either that or come off as goody-goody to the muggles, which they explicitly wish to avoid. They have a reputation to upkeep both in and outside of Hogwarts.

To pass time, they watched trashy muggle horror films in Remus’ sitting room.

After the fourth dreadful film, Remus crept into his parent’s bedroom to confirm they were finally out like a light. Returning to the sitting room, the other three were nearly in the same shape as his parents, sprawled across the sofa and draping limbs over each other. They are terribly drowsy from staying up this late.

Remus wants to let them fall asleep and forget all about the party. He turns off the television and starts cleaning up, leaving them be.

But James almost has a sense for these sorts of things. He suddenly jumps awake with a flinch. He adjusts his glasses and mumbles, “The party…”

In seconds, James has forced Sirius and Peter awake. As exhausted as they are, the three are brimming with excitement to experience a muggle party. Remus has repeatedly told them it’s no different from the parties Gryffindor throws, but they don’t budge.

As they step out the front door, it’s impossible to not notice the group of teenagers crowding in your driveway. Remus, James, Sirius, and Peter watch as they squeeze into your truck. It was already a tight fit with only James, Remus, and Peter in the backseats, Remus doesn’t want to imagine how suffocating it is with seven more of them crammed in.

You're pushing your full body weight against the car door, trying to squeeze it close despite the limbs spilling out.

“Hiya, Remus,” You grunt out, still sounding as cheerful as you did hours ago. You nod to the others, “James… Peter, and don’t tell me… Sevirus Black!”

“Sevirus…” Sirius silently mouths to himself, dumbfounded.

James claps his hands over Sirius' shoulders and lightly shakes him. “Sevirus Black!” He roars. “That’s brilliant!”

You finally manage to close the car door. You rake a hand through your hair and exhale exhaustively. “Offer still stands, by the way.”

They skeptically eye at how packed your car already seems. It’s only then Remus spots the boy filling the front seat next to the driver’s. He certainly isn't one of the muggles who attends the local school. Who is that? Remus squints at the boy, who’s clearly enjoying not being in the cramped rear seats. The girls in the rear seats playfully tug at his curly blonde locks.

You glance back, following their collective gaze. “Ah, I saved you some spots in the tray, just in case you’ve changed your mind ‘bout walking. No one’s mental enough to hike up Crestley Hill. Not even you, Remus.”

“What’s Crestley Hill?” James asks.

Remus can’t be bothered to answer him— Who is in your front seat?

You take the liberty to satisfy James’ curiosity. You point to one of the mountains in the distance. A massive mansion sits at the peak of it, bigger than Potter Manor or Grimmauld Place combined. “That’s Cerise Crestley’s house.”

“You did not tell us we’re walking up there!” Peter snaps at Remus indignantly, his stubby legs trembling at the thought.

Okay, so maybe Remus had purposely neglected to mention that Cerise’s house lies on the highest point of his town. He had hoped they’d be too exhausted to climb up the mountain and settle for abandoning the party.

But then he forgot you can literally be hell on wheels. You and that blasted battered truck, and the wretched company you let inside it. Because just who does that boy think he is?

James shifts around fidgety as he gazes up at the mountain. “Oh come on, there’s no possible way we could cause trouble in the tray.” Remus is fairly certain James has the faintest idea as to what the tray of a truck actually is.

Reluctantly, Remus has to agree that James has a point. Riding in the tray would keep them divided from the other muggles. They’d have to be incredibly thick to accidentally reveal magic from back there. It also helps that he might find out who the boy in the front seat is.

Remus felt he was caught in a time loop. Once again, he was giving in to his friends’ demands, aided by your sneaky nature.

They briefly stop by Remus’ mother’s brewery. Sirius has learned his lesson to keep his mouth shut about it. They climb out of the truck and follow Remus inside.

With a lazy flick of his wand, Remus transfigures a single beer bottle into a wooden barrel of beer and sets the copy in place of the one they’re taking. He then casts a weightless charm on the real one and slings it over his shoulder.

“Lucky we’re all of age,” he says. “I used to have to adjust the inventory to account for the missing keg of beer. ‘Was bloody heavy, too.”

“You’ve done this before? James raises his eyebrows at him in a mixture of surprise and admiration.

Remus pauses, glancing away and tilting his head stiffly. “Yeah. Once—or twice.” Maybe a couple dozen times.

You and you alone have always been invited to parties, not the scrawny neighbor across the street you insisted had to come. He had to earn his keep somehow.

“You never fail to surprise us, Moony,” James swoons.

The drive up Crestley Mountain is downright terrifying. It’s intensified by the fact the four are literally raw dogging it in the truck tray, clinging on for dear life. They’re missing the dreaded seatbelt mechanism as the car lurches around the sharp bends, dangerously skirting the edge of the mountain road.

Peter is entirely too concerned about the keg of beer than his own safety, holding onto it like a lifeline.

Remus resents how unpredictable the road is. He hasn’t gotten a decent look at you and that boy since the ascent up the mountain.

The vicious ride fuels James' adrenaline, he’s grinning madly and cackles at every sudden lurch.

Sirius mirrors him for a bit, until he lets out an earsplitting shriek. He screams so loud it overpowers the music you’ve been blasting from the car radio. You slow the vehicle to a stop and lower the music down to a soft hum. Sticking your head out the cranked down window, you shout out, “Alright back there? I haven’t been driving that recklessly, have I?”

Even the muggles use the little space they have to spare to turn around. They peer at the four through the rear window, wondering what could’ve possibly caused his blood curdling scream.

Sirius’ pale shaky hand raises and he points to the earthy mountainside. “What. Is. That?!” He gasps out.

You and the muggles follow his finger, but can’t quite see where his fear is placed.

“…Er, a mountain goat?” You offer with a quirked eyebrow.

“Oh for Merlin’s sake, calm down, Padfoot,” James forces out a laugh, trying to diffuse the tension. “I practically am one of those once a month.”

Everyone, and Remus means everyone, stares at James.

Remus throws an arm over James’ shoulder, ensuring the grip will shut him up. “This bloody party animal!” He says through a clenched smile. Remus’ other hand rakes through James’ hair, it's meant to look playful but his knuckles are ghostly white.

James tries his best to keep up the boyish roughhousing act in front of the muggles despite how he squirms and claws at Remus’ grip. “You know how wild I can get!” James groans out through a strained grin.

“These city boys…” you tut as you duck your head back into the car. The music is quickly turned back up and louder than it was before. It drowns out whatever the muggles are saying, so much so that they can’t even hear each other. Remus sees them shouting, trying to raise their voices over the blaring music but their efforts go in vain.

Remus releases James with a rough jerk.

“You guys are not allowed to get drunk,” Remus pointedly says.

James smooths down his hair (which does nothing) and massages his neck. “Muggle liquor has got nothing on us wizards.”

Without a word, Remus holds out his hand. The other three understand and reluctantly turn over their wands. Remus wants to trust them, truly, but he much rather doesn’t want to risk exposing magic to muggles.

Remus believes he made a good call by confiscating their wands.

Three minutes in the party and they were all scattered. Remus spots Peter in the pool, fully clothed while lazily drifting on an inflatable tube. Sirius is across the yard, shamelessly flirting with some girls. Of course James is by his side, playing as Sirius’s wingman and trying to avoid coming off as an eligible bachelor.

Remus knows you’d be away from the swimming pool, the mess of bodies, and spilling drinks. Instead he knows to find you somewhere the music fades to a soft hum, but where there’s still a perfect view to watch people make a drunken fool of themselves.

There’s no better place for that than the roof.

You’re already there when Remus looks up. You are sitting comfortably on a flat bit of the roof with your cream soda, legs stretching out as you watch how daft people get after a couple drinks. They’ll all forget about this in the morning, but you make it a point to remember.

Remus pulls himself up there with a soft grunt as he swings his lanky legs over. He lands beside you with a quiet thud.

“Don’t tell me you’re too good for my mam’s beer now,” Remus says as he gestures to your pop. He brushes the grim off his trousers and a half-empty beer bottle dangles from his other hand.

You don’t have to look to know it’s him, but glance over anyways, a small smile tugging at your lips. Remus sinks down next to you, not too close, but close enough that your legs are brushing.

You shake your head and raise your can of pop. “I carry the burden of a designated driver.”

He glances at your cream soda with a crooked smile, unable to meet your eyes. “Giving lots of people rides then?”

You exasperatedly laugh. “Oh, just ask me who he is already.”

“What d’you mean?” Remus asks, feigning innocence. Innocence has never looked good on him and you both know it.

You nod towards the party down below. The curly headed blond from your car is chatting it up with several girls, some of whom you drove here.

“Gabriel Delacour,” you say. “He’s my mum’s friend’s son. Gabe’s got an apprenticeship set up in Cardiff. My mum’s letting him crash at our’s until he finds himself a flat.”

“Gabe,” Remus repeats. It comes out more sour than he intended. He can’t understand how the name can roll off your tongue so easily.

You toss Remus an amused look. “He went to my school, alright? Only a year above us.”

“Oh, so he’s a prat then,” Remus quickly declares with self-assured confidence.

You snort. “What brings you to that conclusion, exactly?”

“Everyone from your school is a part,” he shrugs.

“But I’m the exception?” You say, already knowing the answer.

He nods. “But you’re the exception.”

The two of you can cheers to that. He clinks the neck of his bottle of beer against your aluminum can.

“Glad I made the cut…” You say, taking a slow sip from your can. Your eyes are fixed on some point in the distance. “But I don’t think I’d like to be lumped in with your lot.”

“They’re doing better than I expected,” Remus admits with a small shrug. He has to give them credit, their worst slip ups have just been odd phrases that people can chalk up to eccentric Englandness.

Your eyes suddenly widen. You sit up straighter and place a cautionary hand on his arm as your other shoots out to point. “No — Remus, look.”

Remus follows your line of sight.

Down on the lawn, James is writhing. He’s yelping dramatically and yanks his clothes off until he’s down to a shirt and underwear. “They’re biting me, they’re biting me!” He shrieks. James helplessly tugs at his shirt which almost seems to be clinging on to him.

Remus shoots to his feet and is damn near ready to leap off the roof. You help him collect the sense to safely climb down and regroup with Sirius and Peter.

“I think he’s jinxed his clothes to bite him,” Peter blurts out, wide eyed.

“How?! I took your bloody wands!” Remus exclaims. He’s so worried over James that he doesn’t care about mentioning magic.

“Beats me,” Sirius unhelpfully adds, biting back an entertained smile. He wipes the grin off his face after meeting the worrisome eyes of Remus and Peter. He cranes his neck and explains. “James wanted to charm the drinks of some handsy girls to spill on themselves. Being drunk and wandless probably didn’t help. No wonder it backfired, or maybe it was Lily’s spirit damning him for getting in that situation in the first place.”

Remus and Sirius each slings one of James’ arms around their shoulders, together they haul James to his feet. Remus winces, feeling James’ shirt take little nips at him while they drag him away. Peter scurries around behind them, trying to find all the clothing James tossed aside.

“I want whatever he’s on,” someone slurs in Welsh as the four boys stumble away from the crowd.

taglist. @poepard

[miraclemuncher]

can you please add me to the Phantom taglist?🫣☺️

yesss ofc

[miraclemuncher]

phantasm

008. the tarot cards say it’s not so bad

remus lupin જ⁀➴ fem!vampire!oc

summary. Remus Lupin is under the assumption snape is a drug dealer and his biggest customer is Jubilation Delight

tags/warning. marauders era

series masterlist → previous → 9. sweetness, i was only joking

Remus learned more about Delight in one night than he had in all the weeks he’d spent “investigating” her. She could be sneakily observant. Remus doesn’t know how much she can find out about someone without anyone noticing, that worried him. Delight also had ridiculously low stamina. He’s confident any one of his friends’ animagus forms could outrun her in a scenario where she’s chasing after them, though he doubts the knowledge would help him anytime soon. Despite learning all this, it did little to support his firefly animagus theory.

Remus and Lily walked to Gryffindor common room in silence. At one point, it seemed like Filch was about to give them a hard time. Then he spotted the bronze eagle masks (Remus got one too!) in their hands and begrudgingly left them alone.

Neither one was eager to address the elephant in the room first. Partly because they didn’t know which elephant to start with. There was the fact Lily has been secretly a part of a Ravenclaw secret society for Merlin knows how long. Then there was Remus being invited by Jubilation Delight of all people. And of course the most amusing one, Lily’s silly confession about James.

“This is quite the development,” Lily finally said. It’s always her who ends up taking the initiative (just not with James apparently).

“What are you talking about?” Remus asked.

“You. Going from staring at her every Transfiguration lesson to receiving a RISSK invitation from her.” Lily was speaking like it was such a grand feat.

Remus disregarded whatever Lily was implying, choosing not to entertain her wild speculation. “What’s the big deal? You were invited long before I was, clearly.”

After Lily revealed her involvement with RISSK, Remus was briefly singed with betrayal. The concept of an invitation-only secret society that held competitions for potions, transfiguration, and sorcery creation was so intriguing. If he had known about it sooner, Remus would’ve jumped at the opportunity to join.

“I’m sorry, Remus,” Lily apologized earnestly. “You know I would’ve invited you if I could. There’s only a handful of Non-Ravenclaws part of RISSK. They can only be invited by someone either A, part of the council or B, an accomplished member,” she explained. Getting back to her original point, Lily said, “Delight is both of those and she chose to invite you.”

“Well don’t sound so surprised,” Remus dryly laughed.

“This is huge,” Lily’s voice still brimmed with a near offensive amount of disbelief. “How have you charmed her?”

Did Remus really want to admit his charm was bribery? Lily was holding Delight up to insanely high expectations when all it took was a couple galleons to get an invitation. She seemed to think Delight has never met anyone extraordinaryly worthy of her invitation until Remus. In actuality, Delight said so herself that she avoids inviting people so she wouldn’t be subjected to the first years’ brewery. At the time, Remus thought it was a farfetched excuse to not invite him.

Remus decided it’d be best to keep up the facade. He didn’t want Lily to know he won an invitation through bribery and not by his stellar academic achievement. “My potions impressed her, I suppose,” he shrugged insouciantly.

“So what’s the next step?” Lily beckoned, and again, Remus tried to remain clueless to her implications. “Hogsmeade? Sounded like you’ve already had your own unique Puddifoot’s date,” she crooned delightedly.

“Nothing happened at Puddifoot’s,” Remus insisted.

They arrived at the Fat Lady’s portrait and gave her the week’s password. Once it swung open, Remus and Lily climbed through and into their common room. They paused at the spot between the staircases leading up to the boys’ and girls’ dormitory.

Remus had every intention to bid Lily a goodnight and heading straight into the bed he was ripped away from, but a thought was gnawing at him. He couldn’t think of a better moment to ask this than now. “Earlier, when you said Delight is both, what did you mean?”

Lily smirked at the fact he’s showing interest, validating whatever theory she’s got going on. “I’m saying Delight is the bloody golden snitch.” For Lily to use quidditch terms, she must really be warming up to James. “She’s the RISSK treasurer and has won almost every single sorcery competition since first year.”

“…You’re saying she handles the funds?” was all Remus could properly comprehend. The roots of a new theory were beginning to sprout.

“What else do you reckon a treasurer does?” Lily opened her mouth as if she was about to tease further, but she broke off into a yawn. “It’s been a long night, Remus. Sweet dreams.”

“Yeah, you too,” Remus replied absentmindedly.

The two separated, going up their respective staircases.

Back in his dorm, everything was deadly quiet. The others were still fast asleep, blissfully unaware of the wild night Remus had. He climbed into bed and pulled the covers over himself as if he’d never left. Once again, his thoughts drifted to the mystery of Jubilation Delight and the secrets she’s hiding.

The RISSK recruitment ceremonies are always a good time. Usually, Billie is one of the ominous cloaked figures brooding behind Rita, awaiting her cues. After taking off on broomsticks, the crew would fuck around at the quidditch pitch until the escort sent a burst of blue sparks into the sky, signaling the task’s completion.

Billie had carefully avoided inviting students from outside Houses, so she’s never been on the escort’s end before. After tonight, she firmly decided this would be the first and last time she would ever invite someone.

She much preferred the midnight thrill of messing around at the quidditch pitch with her House mates, not having to worry about Filch hassling them thanks to Flitwick’s protection. Besides having a blast, the recruitment ceremonies gave her a brilliant coverup for her vampire induced insomnia. She could stay up all night with no questions asked and have a reasonable excuse for her exhaustion.

But Lockheart was making it difficult to enjoy the night.

While the bestest of friends Lupin and Evans galloped to the Gryffindor common room, Billie and the rest of the Ravenclaws had to deal with Lockheart’s abysmal whining the entire trek to Ravenclaw Tower.

Rita remained stone faced. Everyone else was waiting for her to burst, to explode and hex Lockheart into a million pieces. But it never happened. When Rita finally did speak up, all she said was, “What could’ve possibly vexed you to invite Lupin, Billie?”

“We were wondering the same thing,” Xenophilius Malfoy added, gesturing to himself and Sybil Trelawney. They were both students in Billie's year. Sharing a dorm with Sybil took some getting used to, even after six years it was still surreal at times.

Billie blanked. She absolutely cannot confess she succumbed to bribery. Her silence only intrigued them further. Even Lockheart quieted down to listen to her answer.

“Do you…” Sybil started, dragging out each word like one of her phony prophecies. “Do you fancy him?

Before Billie could deny it, Xenophilius draped a heavy arm around her shoulders. “Of course Billie-Bear doesn’t fancy Lupin. That’s like saying I fancy James Potter. It just doesn’t work!” He shuddered for emphasis. “I wager,” Xenophilius sounded entirely too sure of himself, “that it came to you in a dream.”

“You’re both completely wrong,” Billie rolled her eyes. She ducked out from under Xenophilius’ arm. “Lupin’s just good at potions. We can’t have Snape getting all the glory, right?”

She knew mentioning Snape was a quick solution to change the topic. Given his history with Xenophilius, the others quickly lost their will to press Billie further, no one wanted to trigger another one of Xenophilius’ rants.

Lockheart resumed directing his cries of regret to Rita. He tried following the girls up to their dormitory and in return was kicked out by the magic of the castle.

While everyone else drifted off to sleep, Billie lied awake. She busied herself by catching up with the lessons she's been sleeping through until the sun rose. It was only then did her eyelids grow heavy. Before she knew it, she had slept through another breakfast and was about to be late to her first lesson, again.

taglist. (join by commenting on the series masterlist linked above!) @daydreamandforget

[miraclemuncher]

i love your theme, it changed something deeply inside me

If you’re talking about my overall minion one tysm 🫶💛💛 I went through Pinterest and mood board hell to find fitting photos, also there were BARELY any yellow mood boards I could use for inspo so I had to free style it 💔💔 it worked out tho 😋

[miraclemuncher]

I physically can’t bring myself to read james fics cause I feel like a homewrecker

james didnt yearn and pine for lily for YEARS for you to make him nonchalant and obsessed with someone else

[miraclemuncher]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

[miraclemuncher]

the lupin green is beginning to take over the weasley orange thank gawddddd