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the lord of the onion rings

or, what happens when i am woozy on painkillers/asthma meds and my mother and i have a talk over mcdonalds food. the question at hand: what would our friends (and foes) of the legendarium order at a fast food place? i’ve come with answers. not needed, maybe, but wanted? also probably not. you can have them anyway.

aragorn: bacon burger, extra fries, and a large chocolate milkshake. a sensible but hungry man.

boromir: cheeseburger & banana milkshake. what a fucking weirdo. fucking banana milkshake. a cursed being but so sweet and enthusiastic about it that you must forgive him.

gandalf: double cheeseburger, and some cherry coke. kinda weird, kinda just gandalf.

gimli: bacon burger, bbq sauce, and a chocolate sundae. he puts bbq sauce on his burger and doesn’t buy a drink. he sneaks sips of legolas’ milkshake, much to the elf’s distress.

legolas: fries and a vanilla milkshake. he doesn’t like any other milkshakes, and thinks boromir’s banana ordeal is unholy. also he is a surprisingly slow eater. this is usually because he’s distracted by gimli stealing his milkshake.

pippin & merry: long chicken, and a large strawberry milkshake. they share, and compete for who reaches the middle of the burger first. the winner is (loudly) announced to their friends.

sam & frodo: cheeseburger, fries, and a strawberry milkshake. frodo gets the fries, sam gets the burger, they share the milkshake evenly. evidently, strawberry shake is a hobbit thing??

eowyn, eomer, and theoden: mix bag and fanta. the rohirrim are always on-the-go and like to bring a bit of everything. eowyn’s favourite is the chili cheese ball. she always saves a single chicken nugget for merry. fanta seems to be a fav in rohan

arwen: waffle and chocolate milkshake, always bought for her by aragorn. she never even goes to a fast food place?? 

elrond: chicken salad and mineral water. no messing about here. so healthy. so proper. oh my god elrond

galadriel & celeborn: nuggets, fries, and a strawberry milkshake. celeborn gets the fries, galadriel gets the nuggets, the milkshake is shared in a very romantic fashion. yes, strawberry milkshake was introduced to them by hobbits. yes, they love it.

and now, our villains

saruman: hot brownie and a diet coke. it’s just wrong. he’s awful.

wormtongue: he gets a kids' menu. saruman takes the toy out and keeps it for himself, the bastard.

gollum: onion rings and water. he’s a sad, sad cretin.

nazgul: they eat dirt or a biscuit

sauron: nuggets and coffee. the actual worst? like he just gets a black coffee and 6 chicken nuggets and fucking leaves?? what the fuck sauron?

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bc warrior queen galadriel is the best kind of aesthetic.

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(...)and he was only less evil than his master in that for long he served another and not himself.

the OG disaster boi is here. he’s a disaster. smh

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hasty of temper.

it’s another disaster elf!

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the valiant.

have a fingon! this one was asked for by a friend

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the singer

the warrior

the last son.

the maglor aesthetic literally nobody asked me for

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(…) the afterimage of a nebula scattered kisses on your brain

star dust

star dust;

and infinity greets you as a friend with open arms in her finest suit and hat, glittering into your eyes and asking you for a dance

just this dance, love

one more, before you leave?

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(…) a temple in all its glory  decked in gold and tapestries, full of the hushed whispers of healers and priestesses, the future seen through gaps in your fingers… a midnight sky above and firelight inside, the moonlight casting long shadows about herself wildly someone laughing in the depths; wine spilled and children born, and while the clock strikes backward-

death taking a drunken waltz through the corridors where little girls with veils bow to him. 

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husbands braiding their hair :^)

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Heyy me again ^-^ do you still do requests? If yes, can I please request Glorfindel and Éowyn fist bumping, because I'm pretty sure it happened at some point when they met at Arwen and Aragorn's wedding

YAS

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what are 3 things u associate with me

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“fairy retro”  oh look me

i made an aesthetic generator now you can discover urself

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Yo here’s TDF 5 featuring guest writer jokemaker extraordinaire sathinfection , aka Fëanor’s diary scribble on the kiddos

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Guide: Naming a Town or City

There are many things to keep in mind when naming the town or city in your novel:

1) Genre/Theme/Tone

It’s very important to consider the genre and theme of your story when choosing a town name. Take these names for example, each of which indicates the genre or theme of the story: King’s Landing (sounds fantastical) Cloud City (sounds futuristic) Silent Hill (sounds scary) Sweet Valley (sounds happy and upbeat) Bikini Bottom (sounds funny) Radiator Springs (sounds car-related) Halloween Town (sounds Halloween-related) Storybrooke (sounds fairytale-related) 2) Time/Place It’s also important to consider the time and place where your story takes place. For example, you wouldn’t use “Vista Gulch” as a name for a town in Victorian England. You probably wouldn’t use it for a town in modern day North Carolina, either. Vista is a Spanish word and would normally be found in places where Spanish names are common, like Spain, Central and South America, the southwest United States (including southern California), Cuba, Puerto Rico, Dominican Republic, and Florida. 3) Size/Settlement Type An isolated town of 300 people probably won’t be Valley City, but a sprawling metropolis of 30 million could be called Windyville, because it could have started out as a small town and grew into a large city. 4) Geography Words like gulch, butte,and bayou tend to be regional terms. You probably wouldn’t find Berle’s Bayou in Idaho, or Windy Butte in Rhode Island. Words like mount, cape, and valley are dependent upon terrain. Most of the time, you won’t have a town named “mount” something unless there are hills or mountains nearby. You wouldn’t use “cape” unless the town was on a cape, which requires a large body of water. 5) History Is there a historical person or event that your town might be named after? The Simpsons’ hometown of Springfield is ironically named after its founder, Jebediah Springfield. Chattanooga, Tennessee is named after the Cherokee town that was there first. Nargothrond, in The Lord of the Rings, is an Elvish town with an Elvish name. 6) Combination of Words

person name + geographical term = Smithfield, Smith Creek

group name + geographical term = Pioneer Valley, Settlers’ Ridge

descriptive word + geographical term = Mystic Falls, Smoky Hill

person name + settlement type = Smithton, Claraville

landmark + settlement type = Bridgton, Beaconville

Word Lists: Types of Settlements

Geographical Features

Place Words

Common Suffixes

Other Descriptors

Try a combination of two words from any of these lists. :)

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l33tsaber replied to your post “I’d like to thank y’all for sticking with me during this fuckin’ ART…”

but I like trash elves

One of the worst things I have ever drawn.

Based partially off this expressions thing.

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Fëanor but with a really strong Southern accent

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hi i’m tolkien here are my ocs. i call them Elves (not elfs!!! if you call them elfs i will block you) they look like humans but they’re tall, live forever, and have pointy ears. that’s it bye