meisdumb - Tumblr blog

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bye for the next few months lol

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idk why it’s so blurry

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i have no idea how to use tumblr or twitter lol

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The Marketplace

The council meeting had somehow returned to its regular state after Mikoto sat down again. Though, it had ended earlier than expected. They had stated the laws, then it was more of something like a therapy session given by someone who had no idea what they were doing. (Talking to you, besties) Then everyone just left. They just left. He had hoped Mikoto would stay a little longer, but duty called when Fugaku didn’t know how to heat up the breastmilk in the freezer and was terrified he was going to starve Sasuke.

He isn’t a stalker! Besides, he just happened to be close to Mikoto when she picked up the call!

So here he is now at the playground, pushing the swing where his dear little baby Neji sat in one of those baby swings. ‘What a shame they don’t have a playground in the compound’ thought Hizashi, as he continuously pushed the swing, while Neji’s laughs rang through the air. He loved Neji so much, his dear little baby. He promised himself that he would make sure Neji stayed safe. He couldn’t break that promise not after he lost Neji’s mother to childbirth. He couldn’t lose someone else.

Aya would have wanted him to move on, love Neji just as much as he would if Aya was there with them. But, he couldn’t, he couldn’t move on, he couldn’t not blame himself for her death. Aya would never have died if he didn’t take the mission. The stupid mission. It was just a C - rank mission but he had her worried sick. And then her water broke. While he was returning from the C-Rank. He knew the risk, he knew she was worried about him already when he almost died during the war. But he still took the mission. Still, Aya wanted him to move on, and so he did, put himself together, and raised Neji.

Wait, he was supposed to be pushing the swing, not thinking about Aya.

-------

Later they went back home because Neji had pooped in his diaper, and Hizashi certainly didn’t want his son to get a diaper rash, and Hizashi changed Neji’s diapers as they prepared to go to the Market.

-------

Going to the market was an almost weekly thing Mikoto did, sometimes she would bring along Itachi while he followed her around, the occasional asking of “how do you know if it’s good”, and “oh” being pretty much everything.

And today was one of those days. She planned to make sukiyaki, but when she opened the fridge, she noticed they had an empty fridge, nothing at all. Not even chicken. So here she was now, originally planning to just buy some beef but Itachi wanted dessert so they settled on fruits. So as of now she was picking out peaches. With pears, honeydew melon, banana, and countless other produce on top of the beef.

-----

When they were going back, Itachi decided he wanted dango, and Mikoto just couldn’t resist spoiling her little baby Itachi (though he would tell you he isn’t a baby) so here they were now seated at the table while Itachi ate his 13 sticks of dango, while she drank the jasmine tea she had ordered.

-----

As soon as Itachi finished his 13 sticks of dango, they set off, and exited the store Itachi following behind Mikoto. Walking back to the compound should take around 45 minutes, so I guess we’ll still have enough time to make it’ thought Mikoto to herself, as she weaved through the crowds dragging Itachi along with her.

------

Hizashi realized they didn’t have any more apples, pumpkin, or anything at all to make baby food so they had to go to the market.

Realizing Neji had soiled his diaper again, he changed Neji’s diaper and they set off for the market.

------

When they arrived at the market, Hizashi immediately went to the produce section and found that they had sold out of apples. He checked with the owner and found they were out of stock, and wouldn’t receive a shipping until next week’s Sunday.

‘Well I guess I’ll have to settle for pumpkin again. Kid’s  gonna hate pumpkin when he grows up, sorry Neji. But then again, most of the baby food recipes have pumpkin.’ thought Hizashi as he sadly trudged to the pumpkins and picked out a few nicer ones out of the already pretty nice ones.

----

Strolling through the market, Hizashi picked out spices to add into the pumpkin flavored baby food he was going to make for Neji. He was so grateful for those baby recipes Kushina’s mom kept, if he never had them he would have to succumb to using the store bought baby food, and who knows what they put in those.

-----

Once he was done shopping, he carried the bags in one arm and Neji in another, as he walked through the market, heading back home.

-----

And then it happened, Hizashi swears it was a damned subconscious manifestation.

He bumped into Mikoto while they were both going back home.

----

She was going back to the compound dragging Itachi along like a was a piece of cloth, (the same way she would drag Kushina before, whenever they went shopping for anything)  making sure he never got left behind, and then she bumped into someone.

It would've been an embarrassing moment for her if it wasn’t Hizashi.

-----

“Oh, shit! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” muttered Mikoto as she recoiled from the crash.

“Ka-chan, you said a bad word!” Itachi told his mother, being a good boy.

“No! No! It’s fine! I’m sorry!” exclaimed Hizashi once he realized he crashed into someone. (but he didn’t realize who yet)

“Oh hey,” said Mikoto.

“Oh,” said Hizashi once he realized he crashed into Mikoto.

“Oh,”

“It’s been some time, hasn't it, Mikoto?” asked Hizashi.

“It has” replied Mikoto “How have you been?”

“I’m fine, how are you?”

“I’m okay, how’s Neji?”

“He’s growing fast, how’s Itachi and Sasuke?”

“They’re fine, Itachi’s here with me right now,” said Mikoto, making sure Hizashi wouldn’t start another argument.

“I’m sorry,” said Hizashi

“What for?” asked Mikoto “You didn’t let her die,’

“Ka-chan, has been crying a lot at night every night Hizashi-ji” added in Itachi.

“Mikoto-“ tried Hizashi, begging Mikoto.

“Hizashi, no,” said Mikoto, turning him away.

“Mikoto, I- I  just want to help!,”

“How, Hizashi?” asked Mikoto. “How?” she asked. “You’ll never look at me the same now, we’ll never be the same as we were before.”

“Ka-chan you’re angry, you should calm down,” interrupted Itachi.

“Of course Itachi-kun!” said Mikoto with a smile. “Hizashi-san,” said Mikoto, turning back up to Hizashi with a cheery smile. “I think we should continue this conversation sometime else!”

“O-of course Mikoto-san,” said Hizashi, returning the cheery smile. ‘Would tomorrow afternoon, at the Konoha Library work for you? Asked Hizashi.

“It would fit into my schedule, yes of course.” replied Mikoto.

“Well then, I hope you show up,”

“Of course, I’ll be on my way now,” said Mikoto, as she held onto her son’s hand, beginning to weave through the crowd.

“Well that didn’t go well, did it?” asked Hizashi to Neji once Mikoto and Itachi were out of sight.

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Mikoto

(), ‘’, thoughts

“Speaking”

“YELLING,”

[commentary]

October 17, Early Afternoon, Shinobi Council Meeting

Naruto 7 days old, status Jinchurriki

“Anyone who was bestowed guardianship of Naruto Uzumaki under their wing after the death of her parents shall not, now,” said the Third Hokage.

That was the last straw today for Mikoto, first he let Danzo reveal Naru’s status as a jinchuuriki, second, he came up to her to tell her  “please don’t cause any trouble today Uchiha-san, I have enough to take care of already” (no promises bestie), and now was the last straw, he dared  to deny her guardianship of Naruto. She wouldn’t stay silent anymore.

“Three, dattebane, three, three chances,” as Kushina said

“I object,” said Mikoto as she stood up, knowing all eyes would be on her now, even Hizashi’s.

She saw Hizashi seated next to his brother when she came in, the Hyuuga superiority air, thick around Hiashi, commanding respect, and Hizashi a blank face of indifference, (making good use of the Blank Face Seal) thought Mikoto, as she too activated the seal by brushing her fingers over her opposite hand where the seal was inked, before she stood up.

———

‘Ah, I wasted precious time again.’ thought Mikoto as she saw everyone watching her impatiently, some even tapping the table. (they probably wouldn’t do that if Fugaku were here)

———

“Naruto is officially listed to be under my care, would anything have happened to Kushina,” she said. “I don’t understand how Naruto’s status as the jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi should change anything,” said Mikoto knowing very well the Hokage and his Advisors would try to stop her from getting Naruto.

“I’m sorry Uchiha-san, but with the infant’s status as a jinchuuriki, circumstances have changed. The jinchuuriki is a volatile creature, and must be under watch at all times. I hope you understand that, as the Uchiha compound is a valued section of Konoha, and so if the jinchuuriki were to go rampant, the Uchiha Compound would be demolished.” said the Third Hokage.

“I’m sorry, what?” asked Mikoto, she was lost, honestly she had no idea if the Hokage was trying to give some comedic relief (perfect time bestie) or if he was really serious, it was probably the latter.

“So you don’t want me to have guardianship of Naruto because the Jinchuuriki may go rampant at any time?” asked Mikoto, not mentioning the part where he thought she would care if the Uchiha Compounnd was destroyed.

“Yes Uchiha-san, the Kyuub-”

“I think you underestimate the skills of the Uchiha, Hokage-sama. We are very much able to  keep the Kyuubi at bay, especially since that is the purpose of a jinchuriki,” said Mikoto, fuming with anger, the amount of idiocy the Hokage was spurting.

“I underst-“ tried the Third Hokage, before being cut off.

“No I don’t think you do, Hokage-sama, I don’t think you quite understand, I believe the purpose of the Eight Trigrams Seal is to keep the biju at bay, and this seal was made by the late Minato Namikaze,  I believe he would’ve been sure the seal is secure if he were to use it on his own child ” said Mikoto. Besides, she was pretty sure everyone here now knew of Naruto’s parentage.

Her throat practically strangled her when she said his name, he was the fault of this, but Naruto was his child, Kushina and his, he definitely loved his daughter, (days of Kushina rambling about how much Minato coddled the unborn baby in her belly flashed through her memory) but he still chose the village (a fucked up village with no point of return) over his family. It was always family over anything. What he did was unforgivable.

“Yes, but-,” tried the Hokage again.

“No, Hokage-sama , I need a clear reason as to why I cannot adopt Naruto. I need a clear reason, Hokage-sama , but all your reasons you have stated have all been unclear .”

“Uchiha-san, I believe all statements the Third Hokage has stated, have all been valid. How about you give us a valid reason as to why you should have ownership of the jinchuriki?” asked Danzo.

-----

She had clear proof, thank you very much

-----

It was then that  Mikoto realized. The Third Hokage may be a ludicrous fool, but he was a ludicrous fool, and only that, he was just stupid. Danzo on the other hand, he was smart, he was here somewhat manipulating the Third Hokage.

She had a ratherish idea of his plan now. He wanted to isolate Naruto, and act as a saviour when she was at her lowest. Mikoto then realized she had fallen into the trap too, right now. She had fallen for the bait, but she wasn’t caught yet.

She had to step down now. The more she argued, the more reason they would have to keep Naruto away from her. If only  she had realized this earlier.

‘So that’s why he didn’t object,’ thought Mikoto, at least someone else could get Naruto. Though if push came to shove, they could always ask Yagura-kun.

And then she realized something else, all the reasoning, all of it,  the Third Hokage and Danzo had planned it. His words were panicky, as if he was scared someone would catch on. And she did.

Danzo, you disgusting creature.

But still, the Sandaime had approved this, he knew what Danzo was doing and he approved it.

Both of you are the scum of the earth

“What is it Uchiha-san? Finally know your place?” questioned Danzo.

‘Oh, oh, what the fuck?! He’s so full of himself, so confident.’

‘So cocky, I think I do know exactly where I stand’

“Yes I do Danzo-sama , I believe I do.” said Mikoto stepping down.

Her throat tried to strangle her again, but gave in when she started laughing.

-----

Oh, so he thinks I’m just as stupid as the Third Hokage. Well then again, that’s the point. No one’s supposed to know who we are. He really thinks I have no idea. Bestie’s just as dumb as the Third. Add in a little bit of malicious intent and there you go. Pfffftttt! If only I could share this with Hizashi. Oh wait, yeah.

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two endings for 067 & 240 🦑 ○ △ □

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i just really like this photo

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literally not sure how to feel about this piece might delete later BUT my girls r up in jeju island drinking mojitos this is true

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Episode 6 broke my heart 😭💔

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#067

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Them

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what are you talking about, ji-yeong and saebyeok DID go to jeju island and the maldives and they had a wild girls night in with homemade mojitos and everything was absolutely perfect 🤨

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beautiful

Naruto Uzumaki

Fanart

Anime: Naruto\ Naruto Shippuden\ Boruto

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The Pretty Girl (Pt. 2)

Naruto

“Bye!” yelled Naruto, when her new friend left. “Come on Naruto, stop acting like a fool.” chided her sister. “I’m not acting like a fool. You’re just being a big meanie!” said Naruto “I’m not a big meanie,” “You are!” “Am not” “Are so!” “How?” “Are- You said we were going to walk by the beach yesterday, and now today you’re dragging me another meeting!” “Because you have to come along,” “Wwwwwhhhhyyyy?” “You need experience, Naruto-chan,” “I can get experience when I’m older!” protested Naruto. “But why not take a chance to gain experience now?” asked Naruto’s sister. “But this happens all the time!” “This is important Naruto-chan,” “You say everything is important!” “No I don’t,” “Yes you do!” “Okay look, Naruto, how about this? You stop complaining, and I will buy the plushie for you.” “But I don’t want that plushie! I want you to get Naru-baasama to teach me how to make the Cursed Seal for Peanuts!” “It’s a cursed seal Naruto, and you're not mature enough,” “But kaa-chan lets you practice Juinjutsu! ” argued Naruto. “That’s because I’m old enough,” responded her sister “You’re only 13!” protested Naruto. “That’s still 9 years older than you!” “But it’s not much!” “So?” asked her sister. “Yeah, sO?” mocked Naruto, mimicking her sister’s voice. “I only started practicing Juinjutsu last year, Ruto-chan,” “. . . . . . . .  but!” tried Naruto. “No buts! I’ll ask Naru-baasama but she’s going to teach you taijutsu okay?” asked her sister, trying to get a truce. “But I suck in taijutsu!” “And you don’t have any experience in Juintutsu,” “Fine,” said Naruto. “Good,” said her sister, and the conversation ended, as they walked through the Uchiha camp. ------------- “We’re actually going to go visit him again tomorrow right? Asked Naruto “Yes, you’ll break the kid’s heart if you don’t,” “And how do you know that?” questioned Naruto. “He looked lonely.” “Okay. Wait!” “What?” “I forgot where we said we were going to meet up tomorrow!” wailed Naruto. “Don’t worry.” “How? You just said he’ll be really sad if we don't meet up tomorrow!” “I put a transportation marker there,” “Oh, okay, that’s good, wait how did you even get the transportations seals from mom?” “I drew them,” “So, we’re gonna blow up then?” “What the hell is wrong with you,” “Well I’m sorry! The last transportation seal you drew, we almost blew up!” “That was because I tried channeling chakra through chalk,” “So how do I know if you drew it with chalk again?” asked Naruto, as she continuously, purposely, annoyed her sister. “I didn’t,” “And how can you prove that?” “Do you want to visit him again tomorrow or not?” “Okay, okay!” -----------

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The Pretty Girl

Started: 9/21/21

Done: 10/04/21

Posted: 10/04/21

Izuna

“Mommy!” yelled Izuna excitedly, as he ran into the kitchen.

“Don’t run in the kitchen!”yelled his Mother, as she dried several bowls, dodging her son when he attempted to ram into her. (on accident)

-----

“What is it, Izuna-chan?” asked his mother as she dried off the last bowl and put it in the cabinet with the others, before walking over to her youngest.

“I saw a weally, weally, weally pretty girl when you told me to go collect the mushwooms today! She was weally pretty! She had yellow hair, and, and yellow eyes too! Oh! She also helped me pick mushwooms! She’s weally smart too! She taught me about diffewent kinds, and did you know you could kill someone with mushwooms too! Did you know that?! And she said she’s killed someone befowe! And, and, and, she said she was almost dead because of a mushwoom befowe.  And she’s weally pwetty. She also showed me a place where the mushwooms were gigantic! The mushwooms were bigger than me! But then we left because her sistew said we weren’t supposed to go there. And, and, oh, oh! And I met her sistew too! They were thewre to pick mushwooms too!”

“That’s great Izuna!”

“I’m not done yet!”

“Okay, okay,”

And, and, and, then you know what happened?” asked Izuna, pausing to widen his eyes.

“What happened, Izuna-chan?” asked his mother laughing at her son’s antics.

“She said we could be friends! She said I could visit her at the same place we met tomorrow!”

“Aw! Are you going to go visit her again tomorrow?” asked Izuna’s mother, proud of her son for making a friend.

“I think so?” replied Izuna.

“What’s wrong? Why aren’t you sure?” asked his mother.

“Well you and tou-chan always talk about enemy clans, and how they try to kill us, and, and, and she didn’t look like an Uchiha. So I thought maybe she was from another clan. Like the Senju clan (the only other clan that Izuna has heard of, other than his own clan too) that you and Tou-san always talk about. But! She was weally nice! But, yea” said Izuna solemnly.

------

Taking in her youngest's words she was saddened, saddened and angered, that was right. Izuna was only a child, just four years old, yet here he was. He made a friend today, (his first friend other than his brother, who was obligated to be his friend) but he had to take into account the possibility that the other child may be from an enemy clan because he didn’t recognize the child.

Children shouldn’t need to think about enemy clans, they shouldn’t be thinking about death, they shouldn’t have  their guard up 24/7, they should be out and about, laughing with friends, playing games, living without a care in the world, just enjoying life for what it was.

They shouldn’t have any reason to care about adult shinobi problems. But with the time they lived in, children had to kill, and be killed, children had to be adults, children weren’t expected to be children.

She decided, her son was going to meet up with his (soon to be) friend again tomorrow. Call it a gut feeling.

-------

“Izuna-chan! You should go! It’s nice to make friends! I think she’ll make a very nice friend, in fact she might even become your best friend! You should go Izuna-chan!” praised his mother.

“Are you sure?”questioned the four year old.

“Yes, Izuna-chan, I’m quite sure. I believe it will be a super - duper - wowza - cool experience for you!” said his mother.

“weally?” questioned her four year old again.

“Yes, Izuna-chan, I’m sure it will be fine. In fact! How about I go with you to meet her!” replied Izuna’s mother.

“Are you weally, weally, weally, weally sure, Mommy?” questioned her son, again.

“Yes Izuna-chan, I’m quite sure, you'll be fine Izuna-chan. Mommy will be there to protect you!”

“How do you know?”

“Call it a gut feeling, Izuna-chan.”

-----

“What’s a gut feeling, Mommy?”

“A gut feeling, Izuna-chan is a super duper cool mommy power!”

“That’s so cool!”

“Mhm! It is!”

“Will I get the gut feeling superpower if I become a mommy too?”

“Yes! Yes you will!”

-----

And so with doubt all cleared, Izuna continued on his day as normal as ever, except he knew he would have a friend now, and learning of a new superpower called a gut feeling.

———————————

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Hizashi

Started 7/1/21

Done 9/27/21

Posted: 10/3/21

October 17, Late Morning, Council Meeting

Naruto Uzumaki 7 days old, Status Jinchurriki

Hey! Sorry for keeping everyone waiting, we had a lot of thoughts for the next chapter, a lot of drafts were written, most were trashed, and now we decided on giving you guys this.

(), ‘’, thoughts

“Speaking”

“YELLING, ARGUING”

[commentary]

“Welcome everyone,” said Hiruzen seated in the center seat of the council table.

“As everyone knows, our primary focus today will be to discuss repairs for the village districts that had been destroyed during the Kyuubi attack last week. And please do not argue, everyone will have the same amount of work. As expected, we will follow Plan Rebuild, Section C, Phase 2.” said Hiruzen.

---

Hizashi didn’t listen to much of it. He didn’t need to, he was just there to accompany his elder brother. Nobody was here to ask for his opinion. Hiashi was who they wanted there.

‘Well maybe they didn’t want Hiashi there either, Hiashi wasn’t exactly the most likable person in Konoha.’ thought Hizashi

He was only there because Hiashi’s child was arriving soon. So just in case Hitomi went into early labor like Kushina they would still have someone to carry out rebuilding plans. (because his little Neji-chan wasn’t important at all) And though Hizashi said he wasn’t listening, you would hear the civilians' complaints every few minutes.

‘They just had to bitch about everything, didn't they?’ thought Hizashi to himself

---

This council meeting seemed to go well enough, normal enough, if you took into account what had happened the previous week.

But then again they also kept on bringing up this, “What will we do about the dead bodies?” It was mentioned so often, honestly, he thought, they said shinobi were heartless but it seemed like they were the heartless ones. They were so comfortable mentioning death, especially deaths of their own loved ones. It made him wonder how they could claim to be people. Civilians made him feel sick.

Barely anyone asked questions about Minato’s death, it surprised him, though he ignored it without much thought, he supposed it was unanimously understood that Minato had died a hero for Konohagakure. Everyone did like the Yondaime..

---

He didn’t pay attention until Danzo started speaking, midway in sentence-

“-Uzumaki is an infant chosen by us to contain the Kyuubi, it will be the next jinchuuriki”

‘Wait, what? What the hell was Danzo saying?’ thought Hizashi as he started internally screaming and yelling at Danzo. (It’s an ingenious  seal, Kushina’s favorite that she created, lets you yell all you want, cry all you want (particularly useful for the Kushina Bawl), scream all you want, all in your mind, and all people would see was a blank face. Kushina liked to call  it the Blank Faced Asshole Seal, but she still officially listed it as the Blank Face Seal.) ‘What was he doing telling everyone about the jinchuriki? Why wasn’t the Sandiaime doing anything to stop Danzo?! Wasn’t the Jinchuriki an S-class secret?’ thought Hizashi, but with  the Blank Face Seal all people would see was a blank face from Hizashi.

Only con was  that it didn’t stop time, so he often found himself being asked if he was alright. (Kushina said the Time Stop was an easy seal (easy, my ass, thought Hizashi, but then again Kushina was an Uzumaki), but it would “fuck up the entire seal cus it ts’nt useable with the Humanlike Movements for Statues seal, that’s the thing about layered seals Hizashi, you are literally layering each seal on top of each other, and when you do that, sometimes it works, but most of the time, you end up with a burn or some other injury, they work fine on their own but they, say, repel, each other when used together at the same time t’tbane.” as Kushina said.)

---

“-that is all I have to say” finished Danzo.

And then the civilian council erupted into madness, screams and shouts that the child was a shapeshifter, the kiyuubi in disguise, fooling the Hokage and his besties, (‘if only they could form logical conclusions as fast as they form conspiracy theories’ thought Hizashi as he watched them get dragged out)(of course they didn’t actually call the Hokage advisor’s besties, that was an inside joke Hizashi knew) other people accepted the child was a jinchuuriki and could go rampant at any moment, a lot other hypocrisy and bull went ignored as ANBU had to drag them out the doors for the real council meeting to start.

Once the civilians were all evacuated from the room, privacy seals were activated.

---

‘Huh,’ thought Hizashi, that was unusual, though not really considering the kyuubi had just destroyed over half of Konoha a week ago. But those were the really old seals, not the normal privacy seals activated during more important than average meetings, that anyone could bypass, (but was anyone going to stop an important source of entertainment?)but the seals activated today were made during the founding days of Konoha, the best Konoha had since they were gifts from the Uzumaki clan. No one made better seals in the Elemental nations now, not even Kushina (and she couldn’t bypass them either).

Now on the thought of seals and Seal Masters, Hizashi couldn’t comprehend how in the world, [like in the whole universe how,] how Jiraiya was a certified Seal Master, Jiraiya wasn’t even certified a Sealing Apprentice of a certified Seal Master!!! Kushina only ever made it to Sealing Apprentice, but Hizashi could assure you, she could be a Seal Master. [if only her mother hadn’t] Jiraiya’s world of sealing was worlds below Kushina’s. It was like comparing the power of the Sage of Six Paths in his prime to a civilian childs weakest low. It was as if the sealing arts were a joke now.

---

Just then Hizashi checked the clock and realized his ramblings in his brain had taken up a sixth of the meeting, welp, he didn’t care, he’d been through enough briefings  to know that nothing important happens in the first 20 minutes of the Shinobi council meeting most people get up to stretch or use the lavatory.

‘But who could blame them?’ thought Hizashi “they all had to sit in those flimsy plastic fold up chairs, while the Sandaime and his besties sat in better chairs. Honestly, he knew they had to cut budgets because of the toll the war had on them, but seriously? Seriously besties? Couldn’t you give us the same chairs you have, instead of letting us suffer here?’ Hizashi thought, as he walked back to his seat after washing his hands and stretching.

----

“Thank you for your cooperation and patience, (Hizashi sure as hell wasn’t cooperating anymore, the Hokage had just stood by while Danzo publicly revealed an S-class secret.) Since we have publicly announced the jinchuriki (aw bestie, you shouldn’t have!) new laws are soon to be,” said the Sandaime, with Koharu, Homura, and Danzo seated beside him.

“I’m sorry  to those who will be affected by this as since Naruto Uzumaki is now a jinchuuriki, her life will not be as it was supposed to be.” said the Sandaime

“Anyone who was bestowed guardianship of Naruto Uzumaki under their wing after the death of her parents shall not, now,” said the Third Hokage. As Hizashi listened, his lips forming a frown.

‘Mikoto won’t like that when she hears’ thought Hizashi, and by coincidence, there she was as she stood up, all eyes on her, as she spoke. (He hadn’t seen her for three weeks, she never came by, and the Uchiha never let him into the uchiha Compound.)

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Okay I agree with this mostly

I just had to say it

There are just too many inaccuracies with Fem Naruto.

For one I understand why some people name her naruko but "realistically" her name would still be NARUTO because (a) Minato and Kushina wanted to name their child that name because of the character in Jiraiya's book and (b) naruto is technically a food it isn't feminine or masculine so it works for both.

Second I strongly believe that she would have short hair on preferences alone. That and it would be more practical for a kunoichi and easier for an orphan to take care of. It would most definitely be a little spikey and unruly because she would have had to cut it herself and she inherited her father's hair texture. It also would have been appropriate culturally and metaphorically because short hair in eastern culture symbolises dishonor/disgrace and seeing as how Naruto was the most hated person in the village... And admittedly this is a bit of a head canon but she'd want to look as much as the 4th Hokage as possible cause he was Naruto's hero.

That being said if she did have long hair (most likely growing it out after meeting Kushina for obvious reasons ) she would. Not. Wear. It. In. PIGTAILS! Why? Because that's the SEXY JUTSU Naruto! Aka Naruto as a thot, naruHOE if you will. Which is obviously not the the real Naruto, not that there's anything wrong with being thoty or a hoe or pigtails for that matter. Heck I can see how pigtails would fit the innocent, young-at-heart part of Naruto's personality. But seeing as the sexy jutsu is literally meant to appeal to sleazy depraved perverts pigtails are part of the look... yeah....no. She would probably keep it loose or in some kind of updo or a ponytail for missions. And pigtails are stupid.

This fits in with the previous point of basing female Naruto off of naruHOE, is that you shouldn't do that! For the reasons I already explained and ,you know, for "realistically accurate anatomy"! Again "naruko" was imaged to appeal to men's fantasies so the overly feminine hips and face and the sizeable breasts, yip you guessed it, AINT GONNA HAPPEN. You look at Kushina and thats all the reference you need. But also consider Naruto's diet and lifestyle, Naruto was low key ( if we where to consider the height of a skyscraper low) malnourished as F@#& and trained like he wasn't gonna feel it in the morning. That equalled to (prepubescent) Naruto being a runt.... a skinny ass pipsqueak. Therefore female Naruto wouldn't fill out that much.

Lastly Naruto would have been tomboy as Hell! She would have acted just like if not worse than Kushina and dress just as badly as he did in canon. That means she WOULD NOT be wearing a "girlier" version of the canon outfits. I HATE it when they depict or describe Naruto wearing stuff like that or in clothes they would never wear.

I'm not going to go too far into the last point because that goes hand in hand with people making fem naruto too ooc to the point that she might as Well be the authors own original character wtf. (And that's it's own big ass issue). Like Giving her a COMPLETELY different name!??! Making her (and him) ridiculously smart/prodigy! Having the hair colour Red! Naruko while very irritating, fan made and ALSO meabt for NARUHOE (A PERVERSE creation by a pervert [ said pervert being Naruto or Kishimoto is up to you] FOR perverts!!!) naruko is still somewhat forgivable. But a whole ass new name like fuckin Nanami or Akuma or some shit? NO! Just retag the story as OC/self-insert right there. And that's excluding the other stuff prodigy Naruto is not Naruto, enough said. The original show has Way to many already just Stop! You want Naruto to be... Not dumb? Do thatbecause anime has a way of making main characters who aren't smart too unintelligent and stay that way for the rest of their Fucking life even though they have fucking GROWTH and don't have to!!! But there is a difference between not dumb and just having fucking common sense and being a Child Prodigy!! Different hair... I shouldn't even have to explain. Red hair? Cute AU maybe, more for male Naruto because I haven't seen a fem Naru with red hair that was exacuted well.

So basically Naruto's look would stay same cause naruto just straight up isn't someone to wear revealing clothes. Period. Hell it makes more sense for her to wear it cause she's definitely the type that uses wrappings instead of bras for combat and personal reasons and Naruto would probably (definitely) prefer to hide her figure anyway so as to look less feminine, and Naruto (and a lot of people) just like oversized jackets man. And that unfortunately equates to the tracksuit. And let's look at Canon, the reason WHY Naruto wore that tracksuit in that particular colour. We've seen him in other cloths more neutral less eye catching colours. It was to draw attention to himself . This was (one off) his desperate crys for help, a representation of his desire/need to be SEEN. The clothes were on purpose!!

I get wanting her to just dress better but shorts, shirts anything too tight, not oversized in any colour that isn't black, blue or orange just isn't going to do it. At least for the "ninja outfit". There are ways of making that look good, for instance Naruto wearing the jacket around her waist soit looks like she's just wearing tracksuit pants. Which is a very good sporty look (and is as revealing as she's gonna get really). Add the tight-ish black shirt that canon naruto wore , or naruto just wearing more black generally, and badda Bing badda boom hot Naruto. In civilian clothes Naruto is surprisingly more versatile and neutral colour friendly so run with it, but I'd be hard pressed to believe she would wear anything pink or a dress without being forced.

Obviously this all in answer and reference to sasunarusasu shipping purposes and problem (because why would I ship Naruto or Sasuke with literally anyone else? fuck everyone else! Would you ship anyone else with Minato other than Kushina? Sokka other than Sukki?) "they're both straight tho" and "if one of them was a girl they'd be married by the middle of Shippuden" so I made it straight, with femnaruto cause femnaruto is my favourite (no offence to femsasuke, perfectly accurate and beautiful too) is the boom! Second coming of Kushina but if she was serious about the Hokage thing and Sasuke as her Minato as the calm, sensible, supportive and protective partner to her spitfire.