loose-whisper

[loose-whisper]

HI!?!?!? WELCOME!?!?!?

⚠️ TW 4 the content of my blogs : cringe, 'pick me' typing, edgy thought, incoherent and messy English, your basic newbie writings skills aka shallow meaning, lots of word. overall very scattered and nonsensical in writing.

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// IDK WHY I EVEN MAKE THIS BLOG!!! If you somehow ever encounter this then I suggest you to not interact(????), Please 🙏 spare me from the embarrassment of having another being knows about this dumb blog hehe.

This is supposed to be the 'about' or 'intro/opening' page whatever they're called but rn I'm in no mood to actually work on it so ye- why not draft? Cause I still need to get some stuff out in case I accidentally embarrass myself once more. :]

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[loose-whisper]

[loose-whisper]

Please give me reassurance, so I open my eyes, everything felt so vomiting that I feared my way into shutting my sight for eternity.

Your light, bright as it is, glamoring, soft, charming as it is, hurts.

I wanna open my eyes, wanna accept it, wanna fall into such blooming rays. To lose myself, to not ponder anymore, and to simply sleep and rest without feeling as if I was merely punished for doing so.

But I'm afraid, because it's so nice, it's so sweet, it's so calming, it's so soothing, it's so... Unreal

I don't wanna get lost, it makes me feel weak.

Perhaps another time, savior.

[loose-whisper]

"why scared?"

He ask, the wind blew gust of itself through strands of silver and bronze. Wobbly footings, is it the wind, or is it the future? Both, I offer. City night beneath me are hazy, his voice's like a daisy amidst my taunting soul.

Yet, I'am still astrays.

no further answer than—"I don't know"—I simply state, slowly reaching out for a little grip to held me down, his hand.

"I don't know, it felt so hazy, it all felt so meaningless and then not. I felt alive for a mere sec then it's all... Dull... I mourn but then... isn't it all meaningless in the end?" My hand tumble for the warmth further, hoping it'll seep and ease the thoughts away.

He smiles, so delicate. "Aren't we all?" the sun woes in an endearing way, bronze instead of blonde yet no less prettier than the stars he truly is. "Yeah, I know" I shrug, idlely tumbling around his fingers through my own. "which is weird...." I add, gazing up to see if he's still with me or should I stop,

He is.

So I breathe.

"...If us, humans, are born with a purpose, they say, then why are we so lost? How can some have goal and most are not? How can sometime it felt like a meaningful color haze, and then suddenly snaps into a trance of deafening bleakness? Like I was naught but a simple fish snatch from my coral"

I pause

"Am'i even saying anything?"

Am'i even saying anything?

Fancy.

I'm just a person, with a laptop, not on a rooftop, not with a company, alone and contemplating.

So am'i even saying anything?

I don't even know anything.

At least I'm breathing?