lilmaemae

[lilmaemae]

fav boy of the week

kim theerapanyakul

[lilmaemae]

strict top/bottom takes in my fandom? in 2025?

[lilmaemae]

Okay, darlings. This fandom has managed to drive an author from it and they went out with a nuke. All of their work, gone. So it's time to have a talk. I'd love to think none of you were involved in it, so hopefully this is more a reminder to reblog than to have to apply, but it's time to have a talk.

First off, I'm not going to name the author. Their story is theirs. I'm just going to talk generally.

You DO NOT tell an author to kill themselves (kys) or threaten to harm them or that you'll find them or that they're writing their story wrong. YOU JUST DON'T.

"Well that's how I joke with my friends--" Stop. Authors are not your friends. They are at best acquaintances and more likely strangers. They might be friendly with you. I'm friendly with many of you because I see you often in comments/replies and such. And some of you have become friends. But the average author is not your friend, they are a stranger. And if you're the type of person who would tell a stranger to kill themselves, you need professional help in dealing with something deep inside you and I hope you find it.

Authors are out here writing entertainment and sharing it for free. You respect that and be kind. If you can't be kind, you leave. The back button is right there.

This is not an airport, you do not need to announce your departure. If a fic goes a way that you do not like, you unsubscribe and hit that back button. If it turns too angsty or sappy or violent, back button. If their characterization bothers you, back button. You do not need to tell as stranger providing free effort that you hate what they are producing. This fandom is so damn prolific, there's something out there for you, it doesn't have to be that fic.

Please just be kind. The world is horrible enough right now. And if you can't be kind, back button.

[lilmaemae]

Mark started a new challenge [IWTV Font; Insp.]

MY GOLDEN BLOOD (2025) EP. 2 + EP. 3

[lilmaemae]

milklove x blush blossom fanfest

[lilmaemae]

A couple weeks ago I was thinking about how the KimChay argument after the club was parallel to Kinn and Porsche's situation in E5 and therefore, if there had ever been a S2, KimChay should have gotten their own version of the forest episode.

The resulting fic is here; rambling about why I wrote it this way under the cut.

The Nature of the Problem

My starting point with this whole thing is that from a writerly POV, E6 is a problem-solving episode. The characters have been backed into a corner; they need a dramatic change.

For K/P, the episode is about redressing the power imbalance and control issues. The first part highlights Kinn's need to project power due to his position in the family. We saw in E5 how badly that position conflicts with his ability to be in a relationship with Porsche. The challenges they face and the conversations they have are shaped to provide a path to fixing that dynamic, giving space for their genuine attraction to one another to grow into a real connection. That path culminates in Kinn nulling their boss/employee relationship and giving up control (as symbolized by the handcuff), allowing them to start over as lovers.

If I was going to arrogate to myself the task of putting that same idea through a KimChay filter, what was the central problem to address? Kim does have some control issues, but in a very different way than Kinn does. Kim doesn't have a position of power, doesn't have a personal army, doesn't even carry a gun in daily life as far as we know. What he does have is an apparently long-standing habit (per that scene with Khun) of spying on his own family.

I keep coming back to the scene in Korn's office. There is nothing else in the season like it. Kinn has moments of disagreement with Korn but never displays anything other than implicit trust in his motives. Khun can stake out an opposite position to their father in family discussions (like with the one about Tawan), but there's no suggestion of a poor relationship between the two of them.

By sharp contrast, one of the very few Kim-centric scenes we got was completely devoted to showing us how he approaches his dad: fabricate an excuse for being there, search the room, ask a few lightly probing questions, get the fuck out. (I am legit obsessed with Kim's body language in this scene.) The icing on the dramatic cake being that the distrust goes both ways. Korn knows--or at least suspects--that Kim was there for some reason other than filial affection. We'll never know why.

(I still think a likely explanation is that Kim is a good enough observer to have picked up on some of Korn's manipulation techniques at work over the years, and that's why "get out of the house" was such a priority. This theory informs most of my Kim-related stories.)

That's a long-winded way to say that I think the fundamental problem with the KimChay dynamic is Kim's inability to trust people. He's a very isolated character; his introductory scene implies that this is the price of the life he wanted, that he knows it.

However. Kim wants to be with Chay. That will lead to him spending all that time with Chay, as long as the truth is comfortably far off, and finally to that lunge at the studio. As soon as reality hits, though, when it looks like the relationship is going to demand something beyond a surface connection, Kim doesn't merely run from it but tries to deny even to himself that this was something he wanted in the first place--and then regrets that, because the theme of the entire show is that connections with other people are the thing that will get you through life.

Parallels & Divergence

Kinn can't keep his power over Porsche and also have a relationship with him. Kim can't keep his defensive isolation and also connect with Chay. These are very different challenges.

What did that mean for the fic? The central conceit of removing the characters from their usual landscape, a change of context that requires cooperation and disrupts bad habits, holds up fine with both pairs. The symbolic washing away of the past, likewise. They all need a way to remember that they like each other to begin with, and genuine communication.

The handcuff thing was not relevant to KimChay, though. Kim does not need to learn how to let go of what he loves, but the opposite (the point of a B-plot is to either echo or contrast with the main plot). Rock-paper-scissors likewise is not useful to this couple. It's an equalizing game, one where Kinn's advantages of power, status, and money can't affect the outcome, but that's not a problem for Kim. Nor is it an issue of physical reliability. They needed something information-based, a way for him to inch into the space of trusting Chay with who he is.

Chay

Kim is not the only person in this story. Chay also has things to learn at this point--mainly that he can't chase Kim into a relationship. Kim is the cat in this pair (possibly the cheetah with anxiety who needs a companion dog). Chay has to figure out how to metaphorically or maybe literally just exist quietly near Kim until he relaxes, and not to assume that they're on the same page always, because Kim's entire life has been not normal. I don't think it's far-fetched for Chay to realize this eventually. Chay can hold the door open, but Kim has to walk through it on his own.

(I initially started the fic with Chay's POV and then decided I was taking the easy way out with that. Kim's opacity, the little we can even deduce about him from canon let alone actually know, is part of what makes him interesting to me, but is also a challenge for me to write. We don't know much about Chay either, but he's a lot more open and straightforward.)

The Ending

For K/P, the fight at the end of E6 not only precipitates the main plot in the back half of the season, but serves as a critical relaunch point for the K/P relationship. It closely reprises the scene of their first meeting, with one big difference: Porsche knows who Kinn is now, the good and the bad. There's no external pressure on his decision. He knows what he's getting into by coming back, and he chooses to do so. I wanted to use that thematic parallel for KimChay in this rather than echo the episode with an action scene. The initial context for their meeting was the open house, Chay's encyclopedic knowledge of the public side of Kim, and asking for tutoring.

(Also, fighting side by side is not a part of the K/C dynamic the way it is for K/P, who from their introduction straight through to the bullet-time tango are clearly a Battle Couple. KimChay started off their relationship with a duet. And anyway, I wrote two other stories where Kim takes a bullet for Chay.)

I did start writing a kind of 6.5-esque coda scene, but it was mostly "Kim tries to process trauma with an inadequate toolkit" and was depressing me, so I haven't finished it.

[lilmaemae]

laughing at the way kim kicked the first guy so hard he fell down and then just threw the second guy into the wall

[lilmaemae]

Kim, who hasn't met chay yet, is trying to convince a hotshot music producer to work with him And he does research on how to woo this guy over and learns he's really into novel sexy experiences. Kim really need this producer because he's trying to show off sex appeal but like. He's actually an awkward boy who's never had sex, HE NEEDS THE HELP. And he doesn't consider it using his mafia resources in his music career if he just BRINGS the producer to a brother his family owns. It's not like Korn is paying the guy off directly. But just to be safe he brings the guy to a minor family brothel, one of vegas' new ones. The concept is that this brothel is a series of gloryholes all in one room. Some of them are normal gloryholes, some of them are bigger ones where there's a large hole with a flap, where it's just some guy's bottom half sticking out the bottom, with legs tied up to the wall. Kim is... not really into this at all. But it is pretty novel. There's multiple patrons in the room with their dicks hanging out of their pants as they go along and try each hole for a few minutes before moving onto the next one

The producer seems to be having fun at least, Kim is TOTALLY GOING to get him to work with him Mostly he just thinks it's weirdly dehumanizing. a lot of the guys in the holes are completely flaccid, he can't even imagine how bored they must be on their side just getting dick after dick pushed into them seemingly at random beacuse they can't see what's going on Kim sees it on a guy who's got his legs tied up to the wall AND THEN a little WIK lyric tattooed on an ankle (more excerpts from the group chat with @snickerdoodlles, @shubaka, and @thecookieofdoom below the cut)

bard he's DELIGHTED, he's not super famous yet, and each of his fans actually mean the world to him. So he watches over the guy in the hole with the wik tattoo for a bit, and then some guy comes along and sticks his dick in chay and Kim is like YEAH. SHOW HIM A GOOD TIME. But the patron only stays for a few miuntes??? He doesn't even touch his fan's dick at all?? it somehow got MORE flaccid as the fucking went on??? And Kim isn't going to lose his virginity to a gloryhole, that would be silly. That wasn't the Plan for tonight. BUT like. That's his fan! He could totally just like. Give him a bit of a hand job. Help him get comfortable. shubaka maybe Kim lightly stroking Chay's tattoo to hype himself up and maybe Chay gets really worked up over that

bard Behind the scenes Chay is definitely rating each person who uses him on a scale of "how likely they are to be wik", it's his favorite game. He knows it's like 0% chance Wik would even know about a filthy weird place like this, but he likes to imagine cookie (snickerdoodlles) Chay feels someone touch his tattoo: a fellow Wik fan! :D!! bard YES Chay rates the timid tattoo stroker as like, 20% chance of being wik because he's so timid, BUT maybe he's another wik fan! Or maybe the lyrics just spoke to him!

Chay likes the tattoo toucher the best, he's always very polite about getting Chay off but for some reason he won't fuck Chay?

shubaka what if kim strokes chay to the rhythm of one of his songs (he should vary his technique right? keep things interesting? how does one normally do these things?) and chay is like... wait a second? is that...? this is a true wik fan <3

bard Kim absently mindedly humming which is when Chay realizes what the rhythm is, and starts humming too. They can't see each other, but they can HEAR each other just fine

Chay isn't allowed to talk though, or he risks unemployment for breaking the fantasy

cookie (snickerdoodlles) Kim's gloryhole fan harmonizing with him is like. Doing Things for Kim lol

bard Chay has like, a whole setup back there. He has water, he has his phone, he even has like, a switch or soemthing. A treat he bought himself after being REAL BORED some nights.

shubaka is he reading/writing wik fanfic during some of those boring nights? 😂

bard omg he definitely is sometimes he puts in headphones and watches wik music videos on repeat

cookie (snickerdoodlles) it's to help with his job, Chay is very ready to moan to his favorite singer showing off his tummy or that fucking tongue thing

(also: awkward Pavlov reaction consequences, hashtag-WHOOPS)

bard One night Kim comes along and goes straight for Chay's hole only to find there's another guy there JUST LIKE. FISTING CHAY???

cookie (snickerdoodlles) hndnsksjndjd

Kim is Extremely Impressed his fan can take that, but also trying to see if his fan is enjoying it, like that's a lot this patron BETTER be grateful 

bard After that patron leave this fan's ass is actually gaping open???

Kim didn't know that could happen irl?? (he really doesn't pay attention to anyone else here)

cookie (snickerdoodlles) hndnsksjjsjs Kim has eyes for one(1) ass only

bard And like. Kim can't NOT lick that ass after that. It's GAPING. it needs soothing!

(we're ignoring anything to do with necessary hygine for now, I don't have the brains to think about how to make this safe. OR MAYBE I JUST DON'T MAKE IT SAFE. those kimchay freaks)

Moslty I'm thinking about the 10 guys who left their load inside Chay already that night

cookie (snickerdoodlles) Kim wasn't thinking about that when he first decided to kiss Chay's ass, but I vote he discovers he's Into This

bard The feedback loop of Kim learning a new sexy skill with Chay, using that in a wik performance, and then Chay getting off to the wik performance while he's working. The tongue things Wik is into really remind Chay of his favorite patron

shubaka oh but what if kim starts fingering chay, like he's desperately trying to scoop out all of the come in chay's ass and muttering about "how dare they leave him like that" and oh no he doesn't have any water around to help wash it out... gotta use the next best thing (spit). and then well, he tried to be safe and just clean chay up but oops now his tongue is also in chay's ass. 🤷‍♂️

[lilmaemae]

yerim is the legacy CEO of her family’s company who likes to call on her favourite employee in her office for a quick “chat”– before proceeding to tempt and tease said employee with her gaze and mouth and tongue, knowing just how to work her employee up and make her lose control, pin her, spank her, fuck her mercilessly.

I have a question, though: who’s her favourite employee?

is it sooyoung, her newest hire who became a blip on yerim’s radar when she saved one of their projects with an educated observation? it wasn’t that big of a deal, if yerim considers it. they would have lost a few million won at most— nothing to worry about for a company like theirs. yerim wanted to thank her personally and on her knees, though.

maybe it’s seungwan, her finance head. they argue over budgets and logistics— usually taking longer than the other department heads were comfortable with during their weekly meetings, so yerim dismisses them and heads to her office with seungwan still giving her hell as she follows her inside. they both like to take out their frustrations on each other. after the first time, they come to an agreement: whoever gets to make the other cum first gets the final say on the money.

perhaps it’s seulgi, the previous CEO of the first company yerim proposed to buy out as soon as she got her position. seulgi is older and wiser, and even though yerim is technically her boss now, the younger likes to ask for advice from the older woman. particularly on which positions gave her the best stimulation, the quickest and most efficient way to the top— to reach that high. seulgi had an eye for things like that.

or is it the board chairperson joohyun, checking in on the CEO as she does her daily tasks? they have to have a close working relationship— maybe just a bit closer than most. hm, no. even closer. joohyun likes to sit in yerim’s chair, she likes to press her CEO-nim against her own table, she likes to show her just how little space yerim has to make a mistake before joohyun advises the board to replace her. yerim cums at the thought of joohyun showing her just how expendable she is, how joohyun can make her lose everything with just the snap of her finger.

so, who do you think it is?

[lilmaemae]

summit

summary: joohyun, the chairperson of the board, makes time out of her busy schedule to visit and check in on the CEO of the company.

(yerene, mommy kink, slight bondage, exhibitionism)

*yerene path for the CEO!yerim verse

Keep reading

[lilmaemae]

Okay let's see if you can answer this one because it bothers me: Why did P'Payu (and P'Cir with Phu) grab Rain's neck and shove his head down on the bed the first time they had sex?

2 possible reasons that both result in the same thing:

1. Watching like that is only going to frighten the boys, make them anxious, like a kid watching a needle before getting a shot. That tenses them up, and you have to be as relaxed as absolutely possible for anal.

2. The position of sitting up slightly to look tenses muscles in the torso and stomach and all that, making it tight. Laying down relaxes those muscles.

So in both instances, Payu/Cir is saying "Relax so I can get inside you".

[lilmaemae]

The evolution of Boss being all up in Noeul's neck. By the next series, we are going to watch a hickey bloom in real time.

Boss def favors Noeul's neck. He's always got his face tucked in there and the Adam's apple seemed to be his favorite spot to attack this time around. I bet Noeul smells amazing. Truly.

But also I know Boss is a huge fan of Noeul's lips. He likes to touch them. It def felt like a character trait in LITA but in TBNW it seemed like a force of habit.

He likes to talk close to Noeul's ears and kiss him right in them. I heard that Noeul's ears are sensitive and that's why he either always stiffens up or kind of jerks away the way he does (sometimes even looking annoyed). I think those reactions are quite genuine lol.

He's a huge fan of the Lee Tiddies too. I think he does his best to avoid Noeul nipples because I also heard that Noeul's nips are sensitive.

And let's not forget his legs. He loves Noeul's legs.

Alot of the mannerisms we see between their characters is just BossNoeul's natural intimacy it seems. And that's why we eat it up everytime.

I am PRAYING for more hickeys next time. We got a few in LITA but ZERO in TBNW.

There's another post i did floating around with the same content lol.

[lilmaemae]

me in the spring sun

[lilmaemae]

So uh I didn’t expect the amount of attention my fic idea about Dr Chay and lifelong injury Kim would get. Honestly, I thought people didn’t really care about my writing anymore, since y’know, I’m not a “big name writer” or whatever.

However, after being rushed in an ambulance to the emergency department, relapsing and being diagnosed with bipolar disorder, all of that really made me rethink the whole thing and well, fuck it.

Here’s a sneak peek and the very first few words I have written for the fic. It doesn’t have a title yet.

Also, I’m not a doctor. This fic isn’t your go to medical guidebook. Without further ado.

[lilmaemae]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/64175611

finally done with the kimchay fic i've been working on for a bit!

[lilmaemae]

Me telling my bestie about Boy Next World like...

[lilmaemae]

I want to write a post canon fic where Chay’s a doctor because he’s developed immense anxiety about Porsche going out to mafia meetings and possibly getting hurt. Chay doesn’t trust anyone else to heal Porsche. And then Tankhun kidnaps Chay and brings him to a super secret location. Chay finds a mortally wounded Kim and he’s actively refusing to be given an iv drip by another doctor. Cue the angst, unresolved tension and pain, Kim having a lifelong injury and Chay grappling with keeping Kim alive and while protecting his own heart….. the problem is I gotta write it.