letwordsspeak-blog

[letwordsspeak-blog]

5:45AM ( Panic Attack )

My restless night continued into

The early morning

(Overthinking)

Confusion cluttered my thoughts

As my panic attack creeps in

Unwontedly

My heart rate increase abruptly

I can hear the thumps pounding against my chest

As I shake uncontrollably

A trembling sensation ripples through my arms and legs

My breathing gets heavier

And my armpits starts to drench from sweat

Fight-or-Flight; it’s neither

Well,

What caused the trigger

Am I’m that afraid to lose you

I inhale and exhale repeatedly

Gaining control of my heart rate

Bottled up emotions

Recovering from heartbreaks

[letwordsspeak-blog]

Wholeheartedly

I still love you . . .

unconditionally

I thought to myself , wholeheartedly

Nothing last forever but ,

I never thought you’d drift this far from me

Captive to our memories

Inflicts me with bitter/sweet misery

The darkness of the night

Illuminates my loneliness

As silence taunts it

Although it pains me

I still think of you . . .

Wholeheartedly

[letwordsspeak-blog]

If I . . .

If I could rewind time

I'll rewind every time I made you cry

If I can pause time

I'll pause every single time I made you smile (just to hold on to it more)

If I could fast forward time

I'll fast forward all the days I'm not with you

And if times end and we're still apart

You’ll forever have my heart

[letwordsspeak-blog]

The Essences Of Time

What's time to you ?

The Creator , Resolver or Destroyer

Seconds , minutes , hours , days , months or years that has A continuos progress of existence that also pertains to the Past , Present & the Future ,

Or is time The Savior ?

It revives human lives , bring sight to blindness , & heal sickness over time

Is time The Shining One , The Seal of Perfection & full of Wisdom

Or is time The Serpent that brought death to all offsprings

Pain gradually evanesce & within time your body reconstructs itself to build over wounds and scars but Even The Redeemer didn't escape crucifixion

Being behind steel bars , revoked from your privileges of freedom , just breathing , no lifestyle is time to the incarcerates

Time could be your aid or your adversary , your glory or Your misery but it is the positivity & negativity of today's potency for tomorrow's life .

[letwordsspeak-blog]

Breathe

Every morning, I arise wondering

What do God have in store for me  

Will I live to see the night fall of this cloudy day

Will he cease all the suffer I feel in this one lonely day  

Or will I vacate to my room and smother my face in the sheets for the third time this week praying for better days  

My tooth ache, from all this pain that I ate

I try to release it but my conscious won't let me escape  

I'm surrounded by hate, people judging me by my appearances , the content of my skin

And not by the character

I built within

[letwordsspeak-blog]

On My Way

She asked about MY destiny

In my head was the ideal vision

Of how I want OUR life to be

But , in words I couldn't explain

AFRAID to speak what may not come into existence

Maybe, she thought I was lost

I'm not .

I'm on a path with little directions

Just scrolling with grace

Hoping I find a place I love & I'll stay

I'm not lost

I’m on my way

[letwordsspeak-blog]

Imperfect

Someone to converse about my day with or someone who cares to ask how my day went

Someone who dares to be different

Defiles all the rules to society perfectness

And is still beautiful through imperfections

[letwordsspeak-blog]

Anonymous

Life without her is like a baby bird that's just learning to fly

A sun that rises but , blocked by clouds so it doesn't shine

And eyes that are open but are permanently blind

Life without her is like a dream I can't seek

A heart that doesn't beep

Life without her is pointless but , she still remains anonymous .

[letwordsspeak-blog]

I Am Worthy

Have you ever felt like you wasn't worthy enough

That it brought you down low enough to feel empty inside

Do you know how it feel to be giving up on

When every muscle in your body thrives to carry on

Have tears ever fallen down your cheeks

Because you tried so hard

But the outcome still left you scarred

Do you understand the scrutiny in pain

If you were on the other side could you bare this pain

Have you ever had a broken heart

It leave you devastated & hopeless laying in the dark

Do you know how it feel to be loved

Just to be told you're beautiful out the spite of love

Have you ever felt so secure with every touch

To be filled with jubilance by the one you truly love

Have you ever experienced true happiness

Have you ever experience true love

When you do, you wouldn't have to worry about being . . .

Worthy enough

[letwordsspeak-blog]

I Need You

If I were to tell you I need you right now Will you come to me

Would you comfort me

Could you fill my void for you

Show me how important I am to you

If I were to tell you I need you right now

Will it matter

Would you be able to turn these tears into laughter

Can we survive through these disasters

Live happily ever after

If I were to tell you I need you right now

Would you runaway again

This time, not alone..

Take my hand

Us together, off in the wind..

Don't be afraid

Take a stand

I'll take a knee

Be with me

Don't give up on me

I need you right now

[letwordsspeak-blog]

H-E-L-P

" H " is for the History that keeps repeating itself

In a world were the content of DARK skin devalues my health

But does that give officers the rights to take my breath

Blacks losing their lives to Whites who sworn to protect

But , in this Black & White world we're both Americans

Even though our hands are up and I can't breathe is spoken

They still squeeze, squeeze, and squeeze until their magazine is

empty and their barrel is smoking

Blood spills over the concrete like wasted red gallons of paint

They still squeeze, squeeze, and squeeze until their choke hold finally does its submission & leaves us breathless

They want us to protest silently but , hands up , black lives matter; shout proudly

" E " is for the equitability we've been deprive of

Land of the free ?

Home of the brave ?

With liberty and justice for all ?

Why the government keep chicanery minds for ?

The content of our skin darker than yours

That's what my brothers keep dying for ?

" L " is for Life and all lives matter

L is for Liberty but treated like captives

L is for Love but hatred still exist

From past occurrences repugnant to reminisce

" P " is for Progression but we have a lot to still overcome

Over three hundred years of oppression, but look what we've become

A black president , doctors, and professors but, viewed as scums

This not a bawl for help but , a reason to keep enduring

[letwordsspeak-blog]

Questions To Statements

Why do bad things happen to good people

Why Obama speak on changes & African Americans are still not consider equal

Why must I stimulate my mind to try to balance out the injustice against blacks committed by whites who sworn to protect

Why my life moving fast when I want it to move slow

And when I cry out for help no one shows

That's why I let the tears flow

But at the end of the day I put on a smile that still glows

Why ?

Because I'm proud of myself

I use to get depress & discourage myself

Until I discovered myself

Then I remind myself

What's a question without a statement to define it's depth ?