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I need the whole fic

post-canon fics where hua cheng gets amnesia'd back into wuming, who inevitably finds out His Beloved Is Married always read like the meme "I'll be his second husband." (what happened to the first?) "Nothing you can prove."

jump to xie lian, who knows exactly what mental contortions the love of his life would go to rather than recognize that xie lian loves him, deciding to humor wuming's murder fantasy for shits and giggles. 'you want to murder my husband, wuming? hm, i dont know... he is nice. except for the time he proposed to me and then immediately walked it back as a joke- oh, you'd treat me better than that? you'd never do something so cruel? well... im listening.'

cue hua cheng getting his memories back like "gege i thought we were over this. gege. gege stop laughing. gege please. i said sorry!"

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lol I'm sold

ps i also have a mini ppt for this show here: Lost You Forever: A Game of Fuck, Marry, Kill

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REMEMBER THAT POST WITH CINDERELLA WHERE HER DRESS CHANGES TO THE COLOR OF YOUR BLOG?

THIS ONE DOES IT TOO!!

I found a bunch more!!

x

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After shoving Hansel in the oven, the witch turns to Gretel - who is currently fending the witch off with a gingerbread chair - and says:

“I can’t believe you thought a trail of breadcrumbs would save you. I mean, honestly, this is a forest! It’s full of animals. Honestly, the very idea that a dumb shit like you thought you could get the better of me is absurd.”

Gretel hits her in the face with said chair. To be fair to the witch, she takes the chairshot like a champ.

“Ow!”

“Did you know,” says Gretel, “that crows are capable of facial recognition?”

“Eh?” Says the witch, clambering to her feet and pulling a candy cane sledgehammer off the wall. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Not only that,” Gretel continues, “but they can remember both friends and enemies. And they’ll often follow people they remember as friends.”

The two fence with their sugared weapons for a moment, before the witch knocks the chair out of Gretel’s hands.

“Enough with the bird facts! Honestly, this whole attempted escape has been utter clownshoes. Get in the fucking oven!”

She seizes Gretel by the collar. Gretel immediately sandbags, letting her whole body go limp. This eminently practical defense forces the witch to try and deadlift her. Which is hard, as the witch often skips leg day.

“For example,” Gretel says, as the witch struggles and grunts, “if you feed crows a lot of breadcrumbs, they’ll probably start to see you as a friend and follow you in the hope of more food.”

The witch stops. Outside, she hears the thunder of wings.

“They’ll even bring you shiny things they find as presents!” Says Gretel, as a corner of the gingerbread ceiling is suddenly cut away by a large crow with a knife in its mouth.

“Oh shitballs.” Says the witch, as the crows descend. “I hope you know this is a great unkindness.”

“Technically,” Says Gretel, “It’s a murder.”

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the description made it somehow even better

my favourite character, everybody...

… he really didnt know what to do here, did he

[ID: Image one is an excerpt from Scum Villain volume 1. The second paragraph is highlighted in purple. It reads:

Gloom and anxiety fell over the entirety of Qing Jing Peak's delegation. Xian Shu Peak's group of women, with Qi Qingqi as their head, were also deeply moved.

Liu Qingge wasn't good with words. He patted Shen Qingqiu's shoulder. "Your disciple is gone, but you can still accept more."

Image two is fanart of Liu Qingge awkwardly patting Shen Qingqiu on the back with an extremely uncomfortable expression. Shen Qingqiu is shaded with lines of despair and holding the shards of Zheng Yang, and Liu Qingge is sweating hard as his unintelligble panicked thoughts fill the background. End ID]

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pulling sqq into the pool seemed like good revenge at the time. (regrets were had.)

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a sketch of lanzhou that i drew on my flight to taiwan and decided to color (posting with a delay, because my tumblr app broke and i can't post on it??)

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a moment of crystal clear mind if thrown-like-a-cow-in-tornado-ed

her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily

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this was supposed to be a panel redraw until i went crazy

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Isn’t that worth holding on?

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when she says she doesn’t send nudes

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Kinda fucked up and nasty how vampires drink blood, imo. Like. Pepsi costs a dollar seventy five

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my favourite mdzs/cql character dynamic will always always be jiang cheng and lan wangji. born to be mortal enemies forced to be in laws is the funniest relationship of all time. that brief establishing shot in cql episode 2 of them sitting in a tea house at different tables, facing away from each other, not talking is like a sister to me. wei wuxian's death turned a mutual disdain into outright hatred and now sixteen years of boiling rage down the drain because wei wuxian had to get RESURRECTED like an IDIOT and now they have to MAKE NICE and try their utmost not to THROW THINGS at each other at FAMILY DINNERS. which they have now because LIFE SUCKS. such an unparalleled dynamic that i'll be thinking about until i die.