juliannasmommy

[juliannasmommy]

One of the hardest things to accept was not being able to breastfeed my baby until she was one. I had a rough pregnancy, and delivery. Coming home wasn’t the best either, I didn’t have the proper support I needed so badly. I had a spouse who couldn’t take over with the baby for 15-30 minutes, so that I could pump every 2.5-3 hours. It was the most stressful and aggravating experience, and I ended up with post-partum depression. I wish I had the support I needed, and was able to breastfeed my baby beyond 4-5 months. I wish I would’ve gone to lactation specialists, and tried harder to breastfeed. My supply kept decreasing and it just stressed me out even more and made my PPD worse. Having to give my baby formula instead of breast milk was the hardest decision to make. I regret not trying a lot harder and enforcing my time to pump and feed my baby. There are a lot of things I wish I could’ve done differently, and the people around me could’ve done to be more supportive. Instead of pressuring me to use formula, or speaking negatively all the time. This is a lesson to me, and I know in the future I only have myself to rely on for positive support and care.

[juliannasmommy]

Mama’s Girl 💕🤱🏻

[juliannasmommy]

My everything 💕😍😘🤱🏻

[juliannasmommy]

30 weeks! 7 months with my babe! 😍💕🎀👶🏻

[juliannasmommy]

My chubby Princess Julianna 💕😘😍

[juliannasmommy]

My baby girl’s cute little profile! 😍💕😘

[juliannasmommy]

My life, my world & my everything! 💕 I’ve waited a really, really long time for you my sweet baby! Your daddy & I cannot wait to meet you in 4 1/2 more months! So happy to have you as our first princess! 💕😘😍

[juliannasmommy]

“I been on the low, I been taking my time. I feel like I’m out of my mind. It feel like my life ain’t mine. Who can relate? I been on the low, I been taking my time. I feel like I’m out of my mind. It feel like my life ain’t mine. I don’t wanna be alive. I don’t wanna be alive. I just wanna die today, I just wanna die. I don’t wanna be alive. I don’t wanna be alive. I just wanna die.
And let me tell you why. All this other shit I’m talkin’ ‘bout they think they know it. I’ve been praying for somebody to save me, no one’s heroic. And my life don’t even matter I know it, I know it. I know, I’m hurting deep down, but can’t show it. I never had a place to call my own, I never had a home. Ain’t nobody callin’ my phone. Where you been? Where you at? What’s on your mind? They say every life precious, but nobody care about mine.” 💔

Logic

[juliannasmommy]

Unhappy... 😔😪

[juliannasmommy]

Pretty simple before the wedding ceremony. Silver hair, basic smokey eyes and lashes 💋💄👗👰🏻😉😘

[juliannasmommy]

Married the love of my life ❤💍🤵🏻👰🏻 December 16th, 2016 💕

[juliannasmommy]

I decided to go Silver with my hair 😘😋😉

[juliannasmommy]

16 more days until Christmas! 🎅🏼🎄❄️☃️🌨❤️😍

[juliannasmommy]

Hi, My name is Preston!! I’m 1 week old! 😍😘❤️

[juliannasmommy]

There’s always a certain age or point in life, where you realize you want to be stable and start to settle down or want to settle down. For me, I realized it at 22 and a few months after I had turned 22 as well. Although, the person I was with was not at that point yet, it didn't stop me from trying with him and it was a struggle. Of course, it didn’t work out mind you it was about almost 7 years in before I figured out it wouldn’t, not 6 months. I really thought I wanted to be married AND have a baby by 24, looking back I was seriously out of my mind, I’m 24 now. 😂 I wanted someone I could connect with, someone at the same point in life as I was. Someone who wanted to be stable and settled down, the game changer. He wouldn’t have to marry me after 6 months to a year or even after two years. We didn’t have to have kids right away, I’m fine with borrowing my friends kids until I feel ready. Give or take 3 years. Truthfully, I needed someone who could wait with me and be patient because I still have so much I want to accomplish, so much I want to see and so many different things I want to experience. I wanted someone who will experience new things with me and be by my side through all the accomplishments coming my way or his way. I’m not ready for a family, not even close. I’m still too selfish to be a parent, and right now I can be. I’m in no rush to be married, but the thought of it is nice. I want to be able to know someone inside and out before I even have the idea of marriage. I would like to be in good standing with my relationship, my career, my health and my financials before I even tie the knot or decided to pop a baby or two out. Things really do change as you get older, I literally partied from 18-22 hardcore before I realized how much I didn’t want that life I had forever. It was time to grow up and change.. Move forward and get real.. And so I did.. 😊

He found me eventually by the way ❤️

[juliannasmommy]

Is it possible for this statement "I can't live without you," to be true? I find it so hard to believe. Surely, you can't just die because someone exits your life. I used to think I couldn't live without certain people and over and over again I have proven myself wrong. When it comes from someone else it is so very hard to believe, especially from someone you really care for and love. I hate when people don't mean what they say and say what they don't mean. It causes a lot of confusion later on in life for people, when those words or type of statements are proven wrong. 😕

[juliannasmommy]

"You are my baby, baby, baby love". ❤️