jenni-bea

[jenni-bea]

Working on ideas for a collaboration with @fragilityofself for #InvisibleExhibition. Because obviously we don’t have enough to do!! https://www.instagram.com/p/BnwptkMh_22/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=fl9nx2ogz437

[jenni-bea]

2 weeks ‘til deadline! 😯 A reminder that the closing date for our #callforart is the 31st July. Full deets at: atramental.art/call-out (Link in Bio) Please share with anyone who may be interested :) #artopps Taking place between 9th & 14th of October to coincide with World #MentalHealth Day on 10th October, (In)visible will feature a group of artists who use their work to convey life’s difficulties. Curated by @fragilityofself & @jenni_bea. The exhibition will feature work specifically produced as self-expression, communication and therapeutic release. With themes often thought of as taboo such as mental illness, addiction, abuse, and domestic violence, this exhibition promotes honesty and non-censorship. We aim to create a visually stimulating, thought-provoking, inclusive and engaging event that ignites discussion, tackles stigmas and unites artist and audience. Submissions are free (fee to cover costs for accepted artists) DEADLINE 31st July Thank you to everyone who’s sent a submission already, we’ve loved receiving them :) #artexhibition #mentalhealthawareness #mentalillness #conceptualart #stigma #sicknotweak #arttherapy #darkart #fuckcensorship #domesticviolence #abuse #suicide #selfharm #selfharmmm #ptsd #bpd #bipolar #eupd #hiv #disability #eatingdisorder #bulimia #therapyart #ventart #personalitydisorder #lgbtart #outsiderart (at Espacio Gallery)

[jenni-bea]

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Why is it all so complicated? #bequiet #shutup #goaway #fuckoff

[jenni-bea]

Taking place between 9th & 14th of October to coincide with World Mental Health Day on 10 October 2018, (In)visible will feature a group of artists who use their work to convey life’s difficulties. Curated by Amy Oliver & Jenni Bea, who were brought together by Instagram & share similar work themes, aesthetics & motivations.

The exhibition will feature work specifically produced as self-expression, communication and therapeutic release. With themes often thought of as taboo such as mental illness, addiction, abuse, and domestic violence, this exhibition promotes honesty and non-censorship. We aim to create a visually stimulating, thought-provoking, inclusive and engaging event that ignites discussion, tackles stigmas and unites artist and audience. Free to submit (there is a fee for selected artists) For full info visit: https://atramental.art/call-out-2/ DEADLINE: 31st July www.instagram.com/atramental.art

[jenni-bea]

#mothersday You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it. And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it. I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't breathe without me.

[jenni-bea]

[jenni-bea]

Zine now available on Etsy!!  (Digital download also available)  @thomlocke73 @craestor @melissach @jenni-bea @bowiesaliens @overdoseadhd 

[jenni-bea]

Morte

[jenni-bea]

I am creating a zine for an upcoming exhibition in London & WORLDWIDE 😀 I’m looking for submissions of visual & written content, which fit the following brief: “The dark side of the human condition, expressed through arts. Championing outsider artists & promoting honesty around taboo subjects.” (Depression/anxiety/mental illness, addiction, abuse, death) . All submissions will be credited & remain copyright of the artist & could be used on social media unless requested otherwise. . To submit work for consideration head to the ‘submit’ button on this blog or email:  atramental.mag@outlook.com with your work & a description of the concept/subject. . DEADLINE: 1st OF MAY

[jenni-bea]

Ever have one of those days where you can't decide what to do yourself so you just flop back into bed 2 hours after you got out of it to contemplate where your life went so wrong & wonder if you're ever going to be able to turn it around before you waste away from lack of use. No? Just me? Ok then.

[jenni-bea]

I am starting up an online gallery & magazine focussing on …  “The dark side of the human condition, expressed through arts. Championing outsider artists & promoting honesty around taboo subjects.”

I am experimenting with zines first & need creative input & would like your original submissions!  Art/photography/writing/poetry on subjects such as mental illness, addiction, abuse, death.

All submissions will be credited & remain copyright of the artist. Will be reblogged & used on other social media unless you request otherwise. 

Head to ‘Submit’ in the menu, or email atramental.mag@outlook.com with you work & a description of the concept/subject.  

Check out my feed & Pinterest board for the aesthetic I’m aiming for. https://uk.pinterest.com/Jennibeana/atramental/ 

Deadline: 1st May

[jenni-bea]

Photographic project on self harm. See more at www.jenni-bea.com   ©Jenni Bea

[jenni-bea]

Hey look, I did a thing. 'Depict your family' #Collage in collaboration with #GeeVaucher @firstsitecolchester #collageart #conceptualart

[jenni-bea]

You ever get so overwhelmed by the endless possibilities that you feel like you can't breathe?

[jenni-bea]

Bought what a thought was a new photo album for a project from a charity shop & it had a stash of photos in the back. I hope the owner had copies :/

[jenni-bea]

*Trigger Warning - Suicide* Saw a discussion on Facebook about whether suicide is selfish & it prompted me to write this ... It is selfish, but it doesn't feel selfish at the time. Depression/mental illness warps your brain to such an extent that you truly believe it's the best thing to do - for everyone. You feel like nobody loves you or wants you around - if you have zero self-esteem & raging self-hatred how can you be expected to believe that anyone else would want you around? You may realise that people love you & want you around but you may feel like you're a burden to them & feel the clichéd 'they'd be better off without me', especially if you feel you've put those people through shit because of your mental illness. Because you're shit company because you're so depressed you can barely get out of bed. Because you isolate yourself or refuse to go out because you're so anxious that the outside world terrifies you. Because the state you're in distresses them. Because they feel obligated to phone you or come over to see if you're ok all the time or they feel they have to tread on eggshells around you. Because they have to make phone calls to the police, ambulance or mental health services. Because they've become your carer instead of being your friend/family member & you know that relationship has changed irreparably. You don't just feel like a burden on your friends/family. You feel like a burden on everyone because you can't work, you're costing the government & the NHS in treating you, you feel like you're wasting the time of doctors/nurses/surgeons/social workers/psychologists/psychiatrists/CPNs/support workers or anyone else who's ever had anything to do with you because of your illness. You even feel guilty for going to college or going to a gym class because you feel like there are a million people more deserving of that space & it's wasted on you. You feel ashamed of the loser you have become & you mourn everything & everyone you have lost. You feel like you've wasted so much time being unwell that any potential you once had has now evaporated & it is far too late to catch-up & have a positive future. You blame yourself for being ill because you should have been stronger, or got help sooner, or not been so secretive, or taken the meds that made you feel like a fucking zombie or gave you soul-crushing insomnia, made you vomit or lactate or left your mouth drier than Gandi's flip flop or gave you heart burn & a taste like ear wax in your mouth all day, every day or ... make you feel even more suicidal than you started. So yeah, when you have that seemingly endless battle - or a variant of that - inside your own head, all day, every day that's why it doesn't FEEL selfish. And sometimes - it's selfish because it's meant to be. It's meant to be a huge 'fuck you' to the world because you're so angry about the way you've been treated, because all you've ever done is be a good, moral fibered person & be kind to other people but somehow you've ended up being treated like this and stuck in this miserable, lonely existence, feeling these terrible feelings and thinking these terrible thoughts. And you know that no one gives a shit about you so you just don't care if you kill yourself & hurt people because no one was selfless enough not to hurt you, so why should you give a shit? There may be people who say "well I've felt suicidal but I'd never kill myself because xyz" or "I felt like that but I got help" and that's commendable, it really is, but it's not the same for everyone. Everyone's illness is different, everyone's home situation, family & social situation, morals, emotions, thinking & even financial situations are different. Judging people & labelling people as selfish for feeling the way they do is precisely the reason why people are so damned ashamed to talk about their feelings. If everyone was a little more open to differences of opinion & a little more supportive, it could encourage someone who is feeling desperate to reach out & potentially prevent their suicide & the wave of destruction it leaves behind.

[jenni-bea]

@jenni_bea #selfportrait