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Okay so I moved here a couple years ago, and one of the things I did while settling in was plant an apple tree in my backyard. And. In the last couple months there have been weird things happening in my yard at night, noises that I originally brushed off as my wind chimes but sound a hell of a lot like whispering, and soft lights even though it’s not firefly season. Yesterday I was checking up on the apple tree and there was a kid with green skin sleeping in the branches??

What do I do? I don’t know a lot about dryads, I don’t want to accidentally hurt or offend them. Should I take down the wind chimes? Were they always here and just stayed hidden? Did they just manifest? Do I need to start using some magic fertiliser? Are the apples still safe for eating?

I’m happy and sympathetic in my delivery as I inform you that you may have definitely planted a Dryad in your backyard, congrats on the baby!

My first idea of action to take is to slowly introduce yourself to the child, it’s a gamble of if they’ll find themselves comfortable around you but you will probably be the closest thing to a parental figure they’ll know. To start it’ll be a good idea to increase your activity around your apple tree in the day, since that is their home and they’d be sure to see you interacting with them there.

Also take care to not pick their apples, it is a part of them and would be rude to do so. If they’ve already grown apples and they’ve been picked in the past I encourage you to apologize and ensure they understand that you were unaware of their presence. The windchimes would be inoffensive, many of the nymphs and dryads that once made their residence in Demeter’s grotto adorned themselves with tablets and decorations to cover their tree, the modern additions of chimes and nearby bird feeders and houses would assuredly delight them as beckons that attract nature.

Dryads don’t normally gain the ability to take a human form until they’re old enough so if the child you see looks to be pubescent then this is probably one of their first few times taking humanoid form to lounge in their tree, so they haven’t been hiding on purpose. And, yes, while the tree and its fruit will be safe to care for and interact with normally it still is best to take the dryads consent into consideration. If they do allow you to still take their apples I do recommend saving some of the seeds or any fallen branches you might be able to graph to another tree should a storm come in and knock them over, a dryads life is tied to their tree but they can return as long as a part of it lives on and yours sounds like a new being and not a resurrected spirit.

If you are unprepared for mystical childcare or wish to help safety relocate the dryad to an old growth community please do contact the Captain Marvel Incorporated number so Mary or Cadet Marvel can aid you in getting the proper paperwork in order should you choose relocation or with childcare aid if the dryad sees you as a parental figure.

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I just had tea with a talking deer who walked into my living room through the patio. He asked for some sandwiches and chamomile. I don’t know how to feel about this. Has it happened before? Is it normal? Does the deer have a name?

Some odd stories like this do happen frequently in Fawcett, yes, and there’s a few reasons as to why you met a talking deer.

It might have been one of the local Fae, Greek god, or many shapeshifters in need of a snack, which would definitely put you in their favor for such sweet hospitality. Many magical species do use the loophole of open or unlocked doorways as invitations inside and it has been difficult to communicate modern standards for property and privacy with them so there’s probably no malice or intrusion intended on their part.

There’s also the likely chance that they simply are another animal learning human English and wanting to socialize with humanity like our local Tawky Tawny who learned his English speech and manners after a life as a normal tiger speaking his native tongue of Tignorian, the deer you met might still be learning human social customs and didn’t know he was being at all rude or impolite in coming in your home uninvited asking for tea and food.

As to your more pertinent questions; There has been a few cases of talking animals asking for food and temporary companionship, it happens infrequently here but it is a talking point locals indulge in during conversations frequently, and currently I am not aware of a name for the deer you met.

If they come around again I would recommend politely informing them about human social norms and boundaries when it comes to visiting peoples homes, like said before they might not know better.

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Update!

The fountain has been funny cleaned and the water replaced, the fountain is now safe to interact with! A special thanks to our local waste management workers who did speedy and good work in getting the fountain safe for the public again.

Hopefully when the park opens at daybreak tomorrow we’ll have no more worrisome run in with the gods! 😊

Good news!

Mr. Heracles has come to collect his half brother Lord Bacchus!

City officials are still working to drain and refill the fountain so please keep clear of it for the time being! Waste management assured us that all Dionysian wine will be disposed of in a proper manner and the fountain will be back to normal within 1-2 days due to the required cleaning needed because of the wine residue.

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Do not under any circumstances consume Dionysian wine!

The dilution process was lost with the cults practices and is not safe for mortal consumption!

Symptoms of hysteria, auditory and visual hallucinations, severe liver failure and a multitude of other health problems from attempting to consume the wine (both in reported cases where it wasn’t diluted or attempted to be diluted) have lead to many long term health issues and deaths!

It would be a very miserable end if consumed in excess and should not be made as punishment for criminals!

Good news!

Mr. Heracles has come to collect his half brother Lord Bacchus!

City officials are still working to drain and refill the fountain so please keep clear of it for the time being! Waste management assured us that all Dionysian wine will be disposed of in a proper manner and the fountain will be back to normal within 1-2 days due to the required cleaning needed because of the wine residue.

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Good news!

Mr. Heracles has come to collect his half brother Lord Bacchus!

City officials are still working to drain and refill the fountain so please keep clear of it for the time being! Waste management assured us that all Dionysian wine will be disposed of in a proper manner and the fountain will be back to normal within 1-2 days due to the required cleaning needed because of the wine residue.

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Public Service Announcement!

Please avoid the fountain on Binder Street!

Lord Bacchus is on earth and drunk again, he is currently singing Greek sailor songs in the nude and has turned the fountain to Dionysian wine.

Please do not attempt to drink the wine until city officials can drain and replace the water, it will drive you temporarily insane.

Please don’t interact with or try to remove Lord Bacchus, he may turn you into a dolphin, drive you mad, or cause others to be driven mad and dismember you depending on his drunken temperament.

The Marvel family has been contacted and they’re reaching out to other Olympian gods to remove him, please wait for further updates.

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Okay, I recently moved to Fawcett to spend time with family, and I gotta ask… what’s with all the lightning!? I’ve been here a week and it’s barely rained, yet I’ve counted seventeen lightning strikes! In broad daylight! And no one batted an eye! They haven’t been answering my questions either, what is going on!?

General belief among us Fawcitizens that most out-of-towners don’t experience much is that thunder and lightning have become staples since the appearances of our beloved Marvel Family, since they magic and have lightning powers the idea for now is that they just bring storms along with them.

Fun fact! The same way rain with the sun out is called a sun shower some Fawcett locals have taken to calling thunder on clear days sun claps or sun applause! We just really like our hometown heroes

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Hi, I’m traveling and just passing through Fawcett, but I have to ask… wtf??? I went to check out the zoo and a freaking TIGER just jumped out of its enclosure and ran off with a small child on its back. And not ONE PERSON reacted AT ALL!!! Is this normal here? Is the child ok? I haven’t seen any news stories or even posts about the tiger’s escape or the child’s well-being.

The animals here are fairly friendly, especially some of our zoo residents.

Not to worry, Fawcett Zoos’ star tiger is a very sweet soul and no one’s life is in danger around him

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Submissions and asks are open for all who’d like to participate! We’d love to hear from our fellow Fawcitizens and visiting tourists!

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Billy Batson reporting in to celebrate the launch of WHIZ! Radio’s new social media blog!

Feel free to contact and send us stories of your experiences visiting and/or living in Fawcett, it’s always been my experience to know the days can get weirder but you’ll always have a place in the community to find familiarity and comfort