intj-intp

[intj-intp]

#8

INTJ: You have NO idea how many times during my miserable life I was just about to send a message “Do you even have a brain?” to you, but then decided to delete it, because it wasn’t worth it

INTP: XD I like to make that impression of foolishness and force you to ask me this question

         I also like to make you think that MAYBE I’m super-hiper smart and intelligent

         Please, stop taking away my childhood from me XDDDDDDDDDD

         And of course you’re right, it’s not worth it, because I have a brain

         I’m only pretending that i don’t have one, I like that

         It was so stupid

         But I like to sound stupid

         So I AM stupid

         XD

INTJ:

         …

[intj-intp]

#7

INTP: I feel your vibes

INTJ: ???

INTP: It was always like

          RUBUDUDUDU DUDUDUUD DUP between us

          And now it’s like

          Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

          Ommmmmmmmmmm

INTJ: 

           What.

[intj-intp]

#6

INTJ: Hey, we should go somewhere. What do you want to do?

INTP: <singing on a high note> Junk, coke, weed, LSD

INTJ: …

          How the fuck am I supposed to be serious about you

[intj-intp]

#5

INTP: Your facial expression is just priceless.

INTJ: What is wrong with it? It’s just my face.

INTP: It’s nearly pure contempt and weariness, zero fucks given. It’s just so bad ass that I want to follow you anywhere and come to your side and be in your team. It’s kinda exciting.

[intj-intp]

#4

INTJ: Basically my parent’s characters blended, and I’m the result.

INTP: That’s why you’re so quick-tempered 

          And also a drama queen

          I just love it.

INTJ: The Explosive Mashup.

           But I still struggle to figure out why I’m so intelligent.

           For sure that isn’t their merit…They are just SO STUPID™

[intj-intp]

#3

INTJ: Do you know what just came to my mind?

           Maybe you’re not a complete idiot

INTP: I can’t believe such a thought could actually reveal itself to you.

          That must be truly shocking.

[intj-intp]

#2

INTJ: You know, you can’t act like Malcolm, I couldn’t stand that…

INTP: Malcolm, Malcolm…Malcolm…Nope. I don’t know that guy.

          Fuck him.

INTJ: Malcolm. The mathematician. Glasses and chaos theory. Black hair. Jew.

           Seriously, we watched “Jurassic Park” like two days ago and you don’t remember who he is?

INTP: I know how he looks like. I remember his speech. 

          But his name is so stupid

          He cannot be called like that 

INTJ: And that is why you don’t remember him?

INTP: Exactly.

INTJ: …

           This is a surname.

INTP: OH FUCKING SHIT, THIS IS EVEN BETTER LMAO

          ARGGHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHD

INTJ: IAN MALCOLM. THAT IS HOW HE’S CALLED.

INTP: OKAY, I SURRENDER

          EHH, buffoon

<two minutes later>

INTP: Btw chaos theory totally sounds like me

[intj-intp]

#1

INTJ: Hey, guess what

INTP: What

INTJ: I have finally learned how to tell the difference between INTJ, INTP, INFJ and INTP. I’m kinda less idiotic right now. Be proud of me

INTP: …

          I guess it’s okay that you know it r…

INTJ: *sigh*

<to INTP in his mind>

I HAVE ORDERED YOU TO BE PROUD OF ME

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU

[intj-intp]

Confession

INTJ to INTP: Don’t you think we have here a truly profitable layout? I can motivate you to work and get your shit together by criticism or comparing you to other people (or me). And you at the other hand - you show me another, new point of view and boost my self-esteem. I think it’s really working out.