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i finally read the original Jurassic Park novel and i gotta say that for every character, there was at least one person working on that movie who loved them very much and cared a lot about their portrayal.

except Gennaro.

everyone working on Jurassic Park fucking hated Gennaro.

everyone is so well done and, generally, even an improvement from their novel counterparts.

except Gennaro, who immediately sees dollar signs and abandons his objections, leaves the children for dead, and gets eaten on a toilet

sorry dude

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reblog if you wear glasses. too many mutuals don't know they have glasses wearers in their midsts

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“Had she really thought I would not know him? I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”

me when they tried to disguise the fact that it’s Jeff Goldblum singing in No One Mourns the Wicked.

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being younger than everyone else on this site is so funny because someone will be like "anyone remember the glinky glork" and i look up the glinky glork and it happened when i was 2

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the biggest fumble in AtS was when they let David Boreanaz get away with not having the accent in “Spin the Bottle”. that man signed a contract. make him do the irish accent!

this man's irish accent is fecking terrible

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The Angel episode “Home,” where the Angel Investigations team takes over W&H’s LA division, aired on May 7, 2003. Wicked the musical premiered on May 28, 2003 in San Francisco (before moving to Broadway a few months later). W&H provides very fast methods of transportation to its senior ranking employees. In conclusion, Lorne, as the head of W&H’s entertainment division, very likely saw the original cast of Wicked.

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So, I just binge watched season two of Buffy with two of my friends who know nothing about it, and one of them has declared that...

Angel is her favorite character.

She wants to euthanize him.

Her logic is that Angelus can't be allowed to roam the streets, but the true happiness clause means that he's damned to too a low quality of life with a soul. She loves him, so she wants to put him down like a dog who's lived too long for his own good.

I am. Howling.

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yeah, i mean it wouldn’t work with the original premise. i’m just saying it wouldn’t have worked in the show overall if they changed the episode. maybe this one is a metaphor for changing yourself to impress your crush. maybe instead of Xander’s aggression, we’re seeing the problematic side to his crush on Buffy where he’s a little too obsessed and willing to do whatever she wants.

idk i just think they could have easily done like. lions. if they wanted to make this plot happen.

ok so we all know The Pack is a very inaccurate potrayal of hyena dynamics, but what gets me is that using the correct behaviors would have actually worked in the episode. just with a few changes.

the girl who was possessed (i don’t remember her name) would have been the alpha of the pack instead of Xander.

instead of Xander bullying Willow, he would’ve just dropped her for hyena girl, which Buffy would find just as strange. this gives us Willow’s insecurity and Giles’ iconic “he's turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. of course, you'll have to kill him” because he just thinks that Xander has a crush on a popular girl.

when Buffy shows him attention (because she’s concerned about him), he tries to court her and makes his feelings about her very obvious, as opposed to the whole attempted assault thing that actually happened in the episode. that way he still has motive to pretend he doesn’t remember anything and, bonus, he seems way less hypocritical in the events following Seeing Red

and they can still eat Herbert because hyenas do actually hunt sometimes (but also more of them stealing people’s food or going through the trash would be a better indication of hyena-possession). oh and Flutie can get eaten too (rip dude i love you)

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yeah that’s totally fair. i’m used to being in fandoms where all the characters are teenagers so i don’t really think about it but you’re completely right

Character sexualities: Buffy Edition

What it was meant to be - what it seemed like - what it should’ve been

Buffy: straight - straightish (bicurious at most) - bisexual

Xander: straight - undeserving of being accepted into the community that is the lgbtqia - bisexual (straight i js wanted to say bisexual bc i know if he was written differently people would hard core ship him with Oz, but truthfully he deserved to be the group’s token straight)

Willow: lesbian - bisexual - bisexual

Giles: idek but i do know there was some toxic yaoi shit going on with that Ethan Rayne guy. Bisexual on the last one at least.

Cordelia: straight - the meme that goes like “my crush said she’s from here what flag is this” and it’s the lesbian flag and someone goes “Switzerland” - pansexual (IMAGINE THOUGH HER COMING HOME WITH A GIRL AND BEING LIKE “what? What is it? fym “who’s the girl” my gf obviously? Wait but everyone’s gay” and them being like “Cordy what” and her explaining that she came out to her parent’s in the eight grade and they were kinda like “everyone likes girls a little bit!” And her interpreting that as “oh so EVERYONE’S gay…”)

Angel: straight - straight with pansexual undertones - straight

Evil Angel: straight - the pansexual undertones - be so fr he was so queer you would find him in a kitchen

Oz: straight - nonchalant - queer in some sense though I don’t understand what

Anya (my babbyyyy): straight - omnisexual - ALIVE pansexual (I think I’m obliged to say at this point that yes I do think being hundreds of years old/demon-like makes you polysexual and/or polyamorous)

Tara (MY SHAYLA): lesbian - lesbian - lesbian (ngl they wrote her sexuality like 10/10 no notes, but I do have a suggestion for her state of consciousness)

Spike: Straight - omnisexual but really oblivious - omnisexual (still don’t like him but him, Dru and Angel had SOMETHING going alone)

Drusilla: straight - polyamorous but straight - be so fr the polycule her, Angel and Spike were working was insane like sexual tension so thick you could cut it with a knife

Dawn: a child

Faith: really really straight - really really gay - a lesbian

Andrew: gay - gay - gay i actually don’t really like him but wv

Edit: If Tara was comphet bc yk everything with her family I would cry omg that would be perfect

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Angel’s soul is a sickness and the only thing stopping him from actively trying to rid himself of it is his guilt. when the whole self-loathing thing manages to win out over that, he wants it gone at any cost (i.e. when he slept with Darla)

After recent skirmishes on Reddit, I have come to the conclusion that Spike haters can't accept that he didn't go to get his chip removed, but intended to get his soul all along, because that would mean having to accept that Spike did something that Angelus was incapable of doing.

They can quote Angel saying, "Heard it was just to get into a girl's pants," to try and cheapen it all they want (which is why Angel said it). The fact is, he did it out of sheer remorse for Seeing Red and to be the kind of man Buffy deserved, which is chivalrous.

Not only was Angelus incapable of doing it, but he wouldn't have even thought to do it in the first place, as Season 2 proves. His love for Buffy wasn't strong enough to fight the demon inside him, as Angel fully knows. Spike's love was.

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i don’t think we talk about Jesse being the real reason Xander hates Angel and Spike enough.

like, imagine being forced to kill your own best friend because what’s wrong with him is incurable and will harm others… and then a few weeks later, your crush is dating a guy with that same problem and everyone’s like “oh no yeah it’s fine because he was cured <3”

like. where was this whole soul thing when it was Jesse? vampires are too dangerous to have around? okay fine. oh that one’s good? when it happened to my friend, he was gone and i was staring at “the thing that killed him”. when it’s your friend, he’s still a person who can change.

that’s why he felt so vindicated when Angel lost his soul (and Spike tried to SA her). HA! you can’t pick and choose! if Jesse was evil, he’s evil too! maybe you should go killed a loved one for the good of the world and be over it in a few days :)

as for Spike, his crash out was even more reasonable (in relation to Jesse). it’s not even that he got an opportunity that Jesse never did; it’s just that he’s naturally better. Spike was soulless. he threatened them all daily. he would have killed them if he could’ve. but Buffy trusts with him with Dawn, and at one point, Joyce’s safety.

because, obviously, he can still care about people and form relationships. obviously, he’s not a mindless killing machine. he’s still a person, Xander.

…

then what was Jesse?

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“Dawn: a child” feels weird to say. we literally see her have crushes/kiss someone in the show. by the finale, she’s as old as Buffy was in the pilot /nm

Character sexualities: Buffy Edition

What it was meant to be - what it seemed like - what it should’ve been

Buffy: straight - straightish (bicurious at most) - bisexual

Xander: straight - undeserving of being accepted into the community that is the lgbtqia - bisexual (straight i js wanted to say bisexual bc i know if he was written differently people would hard core ship him with Oz, but truthfully he deserved to be the group’s token straight)

Willow: lesbian - bisexual - bisexual

Giles: idek but i do know there was some toxic yaoi shit going on with that Ethan Rayne guy. Bisexual on the last one at least.

Cordelia: straight - the meme that goes like “my crush said she’s from here what flag is this” and it’s the lesbian flag and someone goes “Switzerland” - pansexual (IMAGINE THOUGH HER COMING HOME WITH A GIRL AND BEING LIKE “what? What is it? fym “who’s the girl” my gf obviously? Wait but everyone’s gay” and them being like “Cordy what” and her explaining that she came out to her parent’s in the eight grade and they were kinda like “everyone likes girls a little bit!” And her interpreting that as “oh so EVERYONE’S gay…”)

Angel: straight - straight with pansexual undertones - straight

Evil Angel: straight - the pansexual undertones - be so fr he was so queer you would find him in a kitchen

Oz: straight - nonchalant - queer in some sense though I don’t understand what

Anya (my babbyyyy): straight - omnisexual - ALIVE pansexual (I think I’m obliged to say at this point that yes I do think being hundreds of years old/demon-like makes you polysexual and/or polyamorous)

Tara (MY SHAYLA): lesbian - lesbian - lesbian (ngl they wrote her sexuality like 10/10 no notes, but I do have a suggestion for her state of consciousness)

Spike: Straight - omnisexual but really oblivious - omnisexual (still don’t like him but him, Dru and Angel had SOMETHING going alone)

Drusilla: straight - polyamorous but straight - be so fr the polycule her, Angel and Spike were working was insane like sexual tension so thick you could cut it with a knife

Dawn: a child

Faith: really really straight - really really gay - a lesbian

Andrew: gay - gay - gay i actually don’t really like him but wv

Edit: If Tara was comphet bc yk everything with her family I would cry omg that would be perfect

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ok so we all know The Pack is a very inaccurate potrayal of hyena dynamics, but what gets me is that using the correct behaviors would have actually worked in the episode. just with a few changes.

the girl who was possessed (i don’t remember her name) would have been the alpha of the pack instead of Xander.

instead of Xander bullying Willow, he would’ve just dropped her for hyena girl, which Buffy would find just as strange. this gives us Willow’s insecurity and Giles’ iconic “he's turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. of course, you'll have to kill him” because he just thinks that Xander has a crush on a popular girl.

when Buffy shows him attention (because she’s concerned about him), he tries to court her and makes his feelings about her very obvious, as opposed to the whole attempted assault thing that actually happened in the episode. that way he still has motive to pretend he doesn’t remember anything and, bonus, he seems way less hypocritical in the events following Seeing Red

and they can still eat Herbert because hyenas do actually hunt sometimes (but also more of them stealing people’s food or going through the trash would be a better indication of hyena-possession). oh and Flutie can get eaten too (rip dude i love you)

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Do we have a franz kafka diary entry for july 1st, i want to know what he thinks!!!

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i definitely think that Angelus helped Spike pick his name. and by “help”, i mean he shut down a lot of options. no way that victorian poet didn’t try to rename himself something dramatic and poetry-related at first. if it weren’t for Angelus, William would have probably ended up Othello or something

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Drusilla is such a queen because she lost two boyfriends to Buffy and literally never came after her. Like she was so unbothered about Buffy. Just on to the next.