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This how I feel about when some one walk out of my life.....it’s hard but I soldier on. One day I feel I will find people who love me for me. 
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I really miss my old house back in IL. This tree was so so beautiful. It was a nice warm fall day. The sky blue as the Ocean. Clouds looking like waves.
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lol when show up to the jersey shore cult meeting and you do not see your 45 virgin snooki’s
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Got a hair cut to day at the barbershop. I feel better about my self. And the fact I don’t look like a caveman anymore.
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To day I been in bed since 7am it’s now 10:28am. I feel so scared and alone of falling in love with someone again. I’m trying to be positive but it’s just hard. Idk how to trust people anymore. I don’t like talking to people because I’m so so scared they hate me or think I’m crazy. The only reason why I’m on this app is because I’m just trying to be more open with my self. Idk I just feel empty inside.
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To day has been really hard. I’d cried a lot over my x-fiancé leaving me. In all honesty I’m not even mad at her or upset. I’m not even mad at my self anymore. Life go’s on...I can’t keep looking at the past. I have to Focus on the now. As for the future all I can do is plan for the best. But I know one day I’ll find people who love me for me. But I’m done letting negative bring me down.
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My mom was the most amazing woman of all time. She stoodup for me and never ever gave up on me. God I miss my mother Rest In Peace..
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Hey guys my name is Matthew. I on a Journey to better my self as a person. I have been through so much good and bad. But if you just want to talk and get to know me that’s cool ! But pleas don’t be negative. 
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