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[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Make It Right

Fandom: The Witcher (Books/Netflix)

Pairing: Lambert x (y/n)

Summary: (y/n) returns to Kaer Morhen for the winter, but she is a little nervous about meeting Lambert again. The two have a certain history together, and Lambert eventully makes it right. NSFW (18+)

A/N: I’ll be honest, I kinda hated season 2, I really hoped it would be closer to the books, but let’s be honest, it gave us Paul Bullion as Lambert, and that is one choice I am happy they made. Can be read as purely Netflix!Witcher, but I tried to mix it up with the books’ characteristics a bit. 

“What is it with you bringing little lost girls to Kaer Morhen?” Lambert snickered seeing Ciri eat her dinner in silence, with a face of reserved apprehension. Geralt didn’t answer, he was too tired for the younger witcher’s scathing remarks. He knew Lambert was only trying to get some information on (y/n) , and he was not willing to talk just yet. Geralt trusted his friend when she said she would follow him to Kaer Morhen soon after. Which is all he was willing to say.

She was making her way towards the keep, more memories coming back with every step of the horse’s hooves. There were many fond memories but just as many unpleasant ones. But it was her home, and the witchers were the closest thing to a family that she’s ever had. The ruins were becoming visible to her eyes. She took a deep breath and rode closer still. When she reached the gate, she jumped off her horse, opened the heavy wooden structure and walked through, the horse following her with a little pull on the reins. “Home, sweet home.” She whispered as she watched the remaining standing walls of the keep, snowflakes hitting it silently. The sight was almost peaceful. She led the horse towards the stalls, and started unsaddling it. “I was wondering when you’d show up.” She heard a rough voice behind her. (y/n) turned her head to look at the person. Eskel was standing a couple of feet behind her a serious expression on his face. “Don’t say you missed me, Eskel.” She said seeing through his pretence, but playing along not letting her lips curl into a smile. He took a step closer and she felt it was becoming hard for him to keep a straight face. She gave up once a giant snowflake landed right on the tip of his nose. She laughed and closed the distance between them, throwing her arms around his neck. “Hello, brother.” She said simply, smiling. “Crevan beag!” Ha exclaimed happily. A Little Fox, a nickname she earned as a young girl, when Vesemir finally caught her sneaking out of the keep into the woods  during nights – quiet, stealthy, moving around without anyone noticing.  “Oh, how I’ve missed you, my dear sister!” He said finally laughing and spinning her around in his arms as if she weighed nothing. She was nervous returning to Kaer Morhen, just like every year, but feeling Eskel’s arms around her, feeling the familiar earth beneath her feet was all it took for her to be grateful to be home. The older witcher put her back down, still smiling at her. “You look like shit.” He said sincerely, looking her over. “Thanks.” She snorted out a laugh. “I’ve been on my way for more than a week, avoiding towns and villages. Didn’t want anyone to follow me after Sodden and after meeting the girl.” She said, her face suddenly more grim. Eskel watched her, his own smile faltering a little. “Are they here?” She asked as she grabbed her duffel bag off of her horse, and started walking towards the main hall. Eskel walked by her side. “Yeah. Geralt and the girl arrived four days ago. So you’ve already met her?” He asked, surprised. “I ran into Geralt just after he had found her. I stayed with them for a couple of days, but we agreed it’d be better to separate. And then I ran into a Wraith in a village on my way here.” She explained her delay, feeling her muscles burn just from the memory of the fight.  Eskel just looked at her. He didn’t want her to fight monsters. He knew she could fight, that she was trained just as much as they were, but she was not a true witcher. And he was grateful for that. She could stand her own without the agony of the trials that no one knew how to perform anymore. “Lambert’s been asking about you. Ever since Geralt arrived.” He said unsure if he should be telling her that. She raised her eyebrows at him. “Has he, now?” She asked looking in front of her again and towards the door. “Are you two alright?” Eskel asked. “When has ever been anything alright with Lambert?” (y/n) said with a dry joyless chuckle. Eskel didn’t say anything more and opened the wooden door leading into the main hall. (y/n) entered behind him, throwing her bag down on the ground with a loud thud that made all the heads inside the room turn towards the duo. Vesemir was the first to get up. “ (y/n), welcome back!” He said loudly across the room. She walked closer to him, hugging him as they met. “I’m glad to see you, Vesemir.” She said sincerely. He patted her cheek lightly. “It’s good to have you back in one piece, my daughter.” He said smiling. She smiled back at him feeling the fondness for the man that trained her swell in her heart. “ (y/n)!” came a shout from down the hall on their left. Ciri came running towards her, colliding with the woman in a hug. (y/n) laughed, glad to see the girl unharmed. “Hello, Ciri. You alright?” She asked. “I think so. But I’m glad to see you.” She said still hugging her. She saw Geralt standing by the corridor from which Ciri ran out, smiling apologetically. She simply smiled and nodded to him in greeting. He returned the gesture. The two remaining witchers sitting by the table rose. Coen and Lambert walked close to the others. (y/n) looked up to see Coen coming closer, hugging her lightly. “Welcome back, sister.” He said with a smile.  Ciri took a step back from her to let her greet the others. Ciri wondered whether they would ever welcome her back the same way, also calling her their sister.   (y/n) met the eyes of the last man she had not yet greeted. The red haired man stood a step further away than the others. “Lambert. Nice to see you again.” She said, trying not to let him see just how nervous she was to finally see him again. He did not mirror the light smile that was on her lips. “Crevan.” He said, but kept looking at her. She looked away and turned her gaze back on Vesemir. “It truly is good to be back.” She said. “Well, how about we let you put yourself together a bit before dinner? I’ll send someone for you.” Vesemir said. “Thank you.” She said, picking up her bag again. “Is a bath too much of a luxury?” She asked with a doubtful face. “Serve yourself, dear.” The older man said. “I mean, you smell like you earned it.” Eskel said and laughed. She threw an amused face towards him and walked away from the hall. “So we’ve got ourselves a second princess? What a treat.” Lambert remarked as (y/n) turned the corner inside the corridor to have her bath. Ciri frowned at him and went back to Geralt, who then send her to the library. The girl nodded and left the main hall without protest. Lambert sat down, but felt himself tense up more and more with every second. He had thought he was prepared to see her again, but he was mistaken. Every fibre of his body felt like it was on fire ever since she had stepped through that door. Geralt walked closer to the four witchers. “Leave it be, Lambert. She belongs here. They both do now.” Eskel said. Lambert just waved a dismissive hand towards him. “I thought there was... Uh, something between you two.” Eskel asked carefully, knowing that Lambert will probably not take the comment lightly. Lambert stood up quickly, looking at Eskel. “You don’t know shit.” He barked at him. “You keep asking about her, then, she arrives and you act like you hate her.” Geralt said, leaning in the doorway. Lambert turned his attention to him, but seeing he’s outnumbered, he just cursed at them and left. “I’m done talking about that dumb skirt.” He grumbled on his way out. “She’s definitely not dumb.” Eskel said. “And I’ve rarely seen her wear a skirt.” Geralt added. “Fuck off!” Lambert shouted. Eskel and Geralt only looked at each other amused.

(y/n) was soaking in the warm water enjoying it as long as she could. This was a luxury not often experienced in the keep. When the water started going colder, (y/n) sighed and stood up, reaching for the towel. She dried her hair out a little bit and wrapped the fabric around herself, stepping out of the bath. She quickly looked up when the door flew open. Lambert’s tall form stood in the door, his face furrowed and his breathing a little heavy. How fast did he walk here? She relaxed a little again, realizing there is no immediate danger nearby. “Close the door, you’re letting the draft in.” She said simply. She felt her pulse quicken, but she had no idea what to expect. He seemed angry. She finally met his eyes. They were dark and watching her. “What do you want, Lambert?” She asked, feeling her voice was tighter than she’d like it to be. He took a step closer and she felt as if she could already feel his body heat. He took another step and she immediately took a step back. She backed away from him until her back met the cold stone wall. She felt herself shivering. She wanted to reach out and touch him, hug him, keep him close, kiss him and tug on his messy hair. But she wasn’t sure he would let her and remained standing still. He closed the distance between them, their bodies almost touching. She looked up at him, her cheeks burning red. He bowed down a little, his lips almost reaching her ear. “I can feel your heartbeat, you know?” He whispered and she felt herself melt into nothing, letting out a small whimper. She missed him being this close, the heat radiating from him. She tried to regain some of her composure, which was hard with her standing there almost naked and this close to him. She craned her neck to be able to see his cat-like eyes. “What do you want, Lambert?” She asked again. His eyes were hungry, but calm. “You.” He said simply and devoured her mouth with his lips. She melted into the kiss, letting a desperate moan escape her lips. “I want you here and now.” He growled and pressed her into the wall. She let him, basking in the way he was making her feel. She let out a whimper and a shiver ran down her spine at the contrast of the cold wall and his burning body. “I fucking missed this.” He said as he threw away the cloth that she wore around her bare form. He threw off his tunic as she made a quick work of his belt. He pressed his lips to hers again and she let her hand wander up to his red locks. She tangled her fingers in them and tugged at them. She loved the feeling of his hair and the sounds he made when she tugged on it. “Fuck, (y/n) .” He growled. “I missed this too.” She said kissing his neck working her way up to his ear. He grabbed her naked backside and pulled her closer. As she gently bit his earlobe, all patience that Lambert had was gone and in one swift motion he pulled down his trousers, and lifted her up, pressing her body against the wall and himself. She held onto him, one hand on his back, the other still in his hair. He watched her for a while, her body flushed, her pupil blown wide. “Please, Lambert...” She whined. He felt that she was more than ready and quickly lined himself with her entrance. That alone was enough to make her moan loudly. He sunk himself deep inside her and she had to fight the urge to shout in delight. Lambert himself groaned loudly, quickly speeding up the pace, chasing his high, hungry and impatient. “Fuck...” He sighed at the feeling. It’s been so long since they held each other like this and she felt her climax approaching quickly. “Fuck, Lambert... I’m gonna...” She whimpered at the brutal pace he set. “Me too... Come with me...” He groaned and after a couple more thrusts she saw white and felt herself clench around him, moaning out his name. Lambert let out a low groan as he finished himself inside of her. They stayed like that for a couple more second, their minds still in a blissful haze. As their breathing calmed down, Lambert slowly let her stand on her feet, still supporting her with his body, so she wouldn’t fall. She opened her eyes and saw that his eyes were suddenly much softer than before. He tore his eyes away from hers and started dressing up again. She grabbed the cloth from the floor and went back to the bath to clean up. As she started dressing herself, Lambert came behind her pulling her back by her shoulders towards his chest. “Tomorrow?” He asked simply, his voice still filled with lust as he kissed her shoulder. “Depends on how you behave.” She said, smiling to herself. Before he could react, there was a harsh knock on the door. “If you two are just about finished in there, there’s dinner at the hall.” Eskel’s amused voice sounded from behind the door. (y/n) looked into Lambert’s widened eyes. “Vesemir said he’ll send someone.” She said as Lambert wiped his face with his hand. “I’m never gonna hear the end of this.” He thought as he took a step away from her, grabbing his tunic and put it on. He waited for Eskel to walk away and without another word towards her opened the door and was gone. (y/n) wasn’t surprised at this. It had been like this for the last three winters. They managed to keep this relationship secret up until the last winter, when Coen managed to stumble upon them tangled in the furs of Lambert’s bed. But it has always remained only physical, with little talks about what is going on between them. At first, (y/n) was confused by Lambert’s desire to be with her only like this, but she enjoyed their time together too much to confront him about it. But throughout the last year, she had plenty of time to think about what they were doing. None of the others cared that much after they found out, they were all more than adults with their own lives. Lambert usually acted indifferent towards her, unless they were alone, which almost always meant they had sex. She realized it probably made him feel more alive, perhaps even safe for a brief moment, the simple physical closeness of another being. And the fact they shared life experiences together and knew of the dangers they faced most of the time; it probably made him feel understood. But they never talked about these things. She knew if she asked Lambert about it, he would only get defensive and start throwing insults and accusations around.

It was what Lambert had said the last time they had spent together during the last winter that made her think about him much more than the previous years. It was the day when the last snow finally melted away and the days were beginning to get warmer and longer, meaning the witchers would soon be on their ways again. (y/n) and Lambert had spent the night together, taking their time with each other, enjoying each other’s company, basking in the pleasant ways they were making each other feel. They had stayed together throughout the whole night, which had not happen often. She had woken with the first rays of sunlight, but the room had been still too cold to feel comfortable in, especially since the fire had gone out during the night. She had shivered and cuddled closer to the warm body beside her, wrapping the blankets around them both, enjoying the immediate warmness that spread between their bodies. She had looked up to watch Lambert’s peaceful expression as the man still slept comfortably. His red curls had been messy, his beard in need of trimming and the scar across his face had made a sharp contrast against his pale skin. But as she had been watching his face, she had realized she found it the most beautiful face on the whole continent. She had sighed contently, hugging him over his broad chest with one arm and snuggling even closer to him. She must have had awoken him with her movements, because she had felt him move and let out a deep breath. He had turned around to face her better, and with eyes still closed, hugged her in return, holding her tight in his embrace. She had closed her eyes again and smiled to herself. “He always acts like the tough guy that lets nobody in, but in reality he’s just a big teddy bear,” she thought. “What are you giggling about?” Had come a hoarse voice next to her. It hadn’t sounded mean as it usually would. She had opened her eyes and saw that he still kept his closed, simply relaxing. “You.” She had said, still smiling. “Hmmph...” Had been all she got in return as he had hugged her even closer to himself. There had been a moment of silence as they both simply enjoyed the calm morning world around them. “I want every morning to be like this.” He had whispered as he had stroked her hair and (y/n) had forgotten how to breathe for a few seconds. It had been the most intimate thing Lambert has ever said to her. He very rarely let his emotions slip out. He probably hadn’t even realized he had said it out loud, but when she had come to herself again she had reached for his lips and kissed him gently. He had responded quickly, looking down at her. “Me too.” She had said. He had watched her for a second before smiling gently at her. That was an expression she had seen only a couple of times on his face. This had been the real Lambert, the one that she had somehow... fallen in love with? Her heart had given a twist at that moment, alongside with her stomach. There had been no more denying it.  “Then let’s.” He had said simply, still half asleep, but also still wearing the same smile. Then her heart had sunk a little, remembering all the work they had in front of them, the promises of help given to people during the previous year and the general incompatibility of their lifestyles with relationships. He had sensed her shift in mood and loosened the grip on her waist, the beautiful smile disappearing from his face. That had been the only time she was the one to leave their shared bed first. The realization of her feelings towards the young witcher and the reality awaiting them behind the closed doors had been too much to handle at the moment. Lambert had sighed, silently cursing himself for not keeping his mouth shut. She had put on her clothes in silence, but she also had realized this had been the last time they would see each other for quite some time. She hadn’t wanted to leave him with such a bitter end of their morning. He had sat up and watched her moving around the room, but that hard look on his face he always wore around the others had been back. She had sat on the bed next to him, looking up at him. He had stared in front of him, avoiding her eyes. “There’s work ahead of us.” She had said quietly, carefully. Lambert had sniggered under his breath. She had felt a tiny, painful tingle inside her heart at the sound. “Lambert, I...” She had said, unsure of how to continue as she had reached to touch his red curls. But he had been quick to avoid the contact, standing up. The pain clenching her heart had changed from a wasp’s sting into the sting of a dagger. He had gotten up and dressed himself. She had sighed, still attempting to save the moment. “Lambert, can we just talk about it, please?” She had asked, pleading. He had suddenly looked at her and took a step closer. “About what? Shouldn’t you be outside, waiting for Geralt? You’re leaving with him, right? Well, I hope he fucks you good, at least.” He had said it with such venom in his voice that (y/n) had been taken aback by his words. She had been desperately fighting back tears at the moment, but his words had also made her furious. She had just shook her head in disbelief, picked up the remainder of her things and left the room, shutting the door with enough force to make it shake in its hinges. She had turned the corner and let the tears flow freely, her emotions a complete mess. She had finally admitted her feelings for him, even if only to herself, hoping he would feel the same and in a matter of a minute, she had been sure he had hated her and that she hadn’t been far from hating him also. Her bags had been ready from the previous night, so she had quickly said her goodbyes to Vesemir and saddled her horse as Geralt had joined her and done the same to Roach. He had seen her devastated expression which sometimes had changed into one of anger. But he had been smarter than to question it, the reason for it quite obvious. “Shut up, Geralt.” She had said, noticing him looking at her. She had mounted her horse and rode off. Geralt had sighed. “I haven’t said anything.” He had murmured and mounted Roach, following her.

That was almost nine months ago. (y/n) didn’t expect Lambert to come to her on her first night back at the keep. She was almost sure whatever they had had between them was over after the last winter’s incident. But he did and they also met the several next nights.

When Ciri started her training, she tried to help whenever she could, usually alongside Coen, who was perhaps the most patient of the witchers. During one day, it was (y/n)’s  turn to take care of the food for the witchers. She didn’t mind, it was a peaceful activity and the others usually said her food tasted nice. Geralt joined her in the room, repairing a piece of his leather vest. They both worked in silence, when Eskel opened the door in a hurry. “Geralt, you better see this.” He said a mixture of excitement and worry crossing over his face. Geralt grunted and put down the leather, looking over at (y/n) , who put away the knife and vegetables she was holding.  Eskel led them out of the keep, towards the training grounds. (y/n) was becoming more and more worried, realizing she could hear the pendulum running. When the pendulum came into view, she couldn’t believe her eyes. Ciri was upon it, trying her best to keep her balance. According to her scratched face and torn clothes, it took her quite a few tries to get as far as she did. Geralt walked closer, watching the young girl. (y/n) stood behind the other witchers, hoping the girl wouldn’t hurt herself further. She noticed the others cheering for her and encouraging her on. “Who’s idea was this?” She asked Eskel, who stood beside her. He was smiling, but his smile faltered when he noticed her expression. “Come on! Steady your legs!” Lambert suddenly called out to Ciri. (y/n) threw an angry look his way. “Of course,” she muttered. In a matter of a second she saw Ciri falling down from the narrow bench in the last part of the pendulum. She ran closer, Geralt already by the girl’s side. She was bleeding from somewhere in her mouth, and had several scratches on her arms and legs, not to mention the way she would be bruised after this little exercise. She just hoped no ribs were broken. Geralt helped her on her feet and (y/n) turned around. “What the hell were you thinking?!” She said loudly, looking directly at Lambert. “Little princess wants to be a witcher, so she should train like one, right?” He said, clearly proud of his work. “She’s been here for a month! How long have you been training for when they put you on the pendulum?!” She yelled at him, coming closer. “Calm down, she almost had it.” He said crossing his arms on his chest. “It was irresponsible! She needs to train more before she can do this and you know that!” She said feeling the other witchers’ eyes on her. Geralt was leading the limping Ciri away, inside the hall. “Are you her mother or something? Are you and Geralt playing family?” He said snickering. But neither of the other men joined him. The rage bubbled inside her more furiously than ever before. Before she could control herself, she closed her fist and punched him straight into his stomach. He did not expect the assault and once he doubled over, she elbowed him hard enough to send him to the ground. “I just care about my loved ones. Which is more than you can say.” She said, calming down. She didn’t look at him no more and simply turned around and left, following Geralt and Ciri. Eskel and Coen walked closer to Lambert who still laid down on the cold ground. “She fucking punched me.” He said in disbelieve. “Actually, she took you down, Lambchops. Rightfully so.” Coen said, offering Lambert his hand, but the younger witcher smacked it away and stood up. “Why are you being such a dick to her?” Eskel asked. Lambert didn’t know if he should be angry or surprised, but he definitely felt embarrassed. Not for being taken down by her, but because he still acted like an asshole towards her, even in front of the others. They all knew they slept with each other; there was no need to pretend this bitter indifference.

Geralt turned around in time to see (y/n) sending Lambert down to the ground. As she joined them, he saw her wipe away tears from her eyes. “Feeling better?” Geralt asked with a sad smile. “No.” She said, still angry. “Lambert didn’t force me to do it, (y/n), I could have done it.” Ciri said. “He didn’t force you, but he was cracking jokes at your expense for so long until you agreed to do it, just to prove him wrong. Right?” (y/n) asked, still looking only in front of her. Ciri looked up at her, surprised to see her this angry. “You’re right.” Ciri said, shrinking a little to herself. They walked in silence for a moment, until Geralt broke it. “Don’t you two just want to talk? I believe when things escalate to violence, it is about time.” He said looking at her. (y/n) looked up at him and he saw that under the anger, she was upset. She didn’t know what to say to that and looked away again.

As she finished cooking the dinner, she called out to the others so they could come get their food. She poured herself a bowl of the stew and sat at the very end of the table, away from the others with her back towards them. She felt tired and still upset after today’s events and she didn’t want to discuss it while eating her dinner. But she still heard them talking about it, she heard her name mentioned by Coen, she heard Eskel telling Lambert to go talk to her, she heard Geralt telling Lambert how big of a fool he was for being jealous of him. That was when she had enough, got up and left to eat her food in peace of her own room. She ate the food in silence, but as she put the bowl away, the tight feeling in her chest was back and she had to fight back her tears. How could she fall in love with such a dickhead? It was like experiencing him as two different people, sometimes even three. First was the Lambert everyone knew – the mean and defensive man, who did not let anyone in, the second one was her lover, always hungry for touch and leaving her wishing for more, and the third one she experienced so rarely, the one who wished to wake up by her side with a silly little smile on his lips. She felt her heart clench at the last image of him, still sleepy, just enjoying her company, gently caressing her face and hair. The tears made their way out and she rested her head in her arms sobbing quietly. What good could come out of such a relationship? There were enough trouble around her, with Ciri becoming a part of their world, with Nilfgaard raging a war against the north, the mages fighting among themselves, and elves being slaughtered across the continent, everything felt too overwhelming. Another sob shook her body and she laid down on her bed. Eventually sleep took her, even though she was still wearing her boots and coat. Gentle shuffling and the cracking of a fire woke her up again. The moon shone outside, it was still a dark night. She made out a silhouette against the flames in the fireplace, but before she could sit up, the person came closer to her, kneeling beside her bed. She didn’t know what to say or even think when she saw the mess of red curls in front of her. Lambert didn’t say anything, only looked at her. His eyes seemed soft and almost sad. She studied his face and for the first time, he didn’t avoid her gaze, but took it, as a part of his punishment. Being seen. The most terrifying way of expressing trust to another person. She reached out to touch his messy hair, expecting him to flinch away, but he didn’t. ”What is it?” She asked finally, her voice gentle and full of worry. Lambert looked down again, sighing. Anyone else would be furious with him, but she still worried about him.   (y/n) sat up on the bed sleepily and Lambert joined her by her side. There was silence and the tension in the air was becoming thicker and thicker. “Lambert...” She said quietly, looking up at him. “I’m done.” He said suddenly. Those words sent a shiver down her spine.  Was this it? Whatever they had, was it over? She drew in a sharp breath. “I... I...” She said, stuttering, but he didn’t let her finish. “I’m done pretending. Pretending I don’t care about you, pretending all of this between us means nothing. I’m done, and I’m sorry I’m being such a jerk to you.” He said quickly, looking at her at the last sentence. “I’m sorry about what happened with Ciri today and I’m sorry about that morning last winter...” He said, more quiet than before. She has never heard Lambert apologise, not like this, not sincerely. Her heart was beating fast and she felt herself unable to speak for a while. “Lambert, I’m sorry about that morning too. I got scared what it might bring us, but no matter what happened, I couldn’t stop thinking about you for the last nine months.” She said, caressing his back lightly. He didn’t move away and again let her gently touch him. He saw her soft expression and he smiled at her lightly. “Am I that handsome?” He joked quietly. She rolled her eyes but smiled at him. “Well, yes, that helps.” She said. “What were you scared of?” He asked suddenly, his face serious again. She wasn’t sure what to say. That morning, her mind was a mess, she realized how much in love with him she was, but also was aware of their responsibilities. She played with her fingers in her lap, looking at them.  “We both had our plans, you wanted to head west, while I knew I needed to help Geralt. We both knew we would be leaving our separate ways that morning. But if I stayed, if I told you how I truly felt that moment, I don’t think I would be able to leave. I didn’t want to put my own feelings before what needed to be done, and I also wasn’t sure if you’d feel the same or if I only imagined it, and...” She rambled and Lambert bent down and kissed her lightly to stop her, his curls tickling her face. “ (y/n), breathe.” He said. She did as he told her, closing her eyes for a second, letting a few tears escape. “We’ve hurt each other, me much more than you.” He said, holding her hands in his, to stop her from fidgeting. “Yeah, you can be a dick.” She said, smiling lightly at him. He laughed quietly and gently wiped away her tears. Her mind was racing. This was the third kind of Lambert, the one smiling at her, still half asleep, wanting her to stay by his side. And she enjoyed every second of his presence. “I’m done with that too.” He said looking her in the eyes. “During those nine months, I realized how boring my life is without you. I missed your laugh, your bright eyes, your kindness...” He said. “Don’t forget the sex.” She said smiling. He smiled back. “You wouldn’t believe how much I missed that.” He said still smiling. “I think you proved it to me on our first night of this winter.” She said, sitting as close to him as possible. He hugged her across her shoulders, drawing her even closer to him. “But I also missed just having you around.” He said, trying to keep looking into her eyes. He caressed her cheek and she almost melted into his palm. As she let out a content sigh, Lambert felt himself overwhelmed with so much emotion he almost didn’t say what he came here to tell her in the first place. “I love you, so much, (y/n). I want to make things right between us.” He said and waited for her reaction with a wildly beating heart. Her eyes widened, tears welling up in them. She felt she couldn’t speak, and simply smiled and kissed Lambert hard. “I love you too.” She said suddenly between the kisses. “So, so much.” She said as the kisses became more and more passionate. They laid down on the bed, never letting go, their teeth clattering against each other, hands roaming over each other’s bodies as if it was their first time exploring them. Pieces of clothing flew to the ground and quiet panting of delight filled the quiet air of the room. Lambert took his time with her, enjoying every movement of their bodies against each other, every little sound that she made. Among the soft sighs and moans, a quiet I love you could be heard every once in a while, coming from both of them. Geralt, walking by the room, couldn’t really avoid hearing all of this. But he simply continued on his way with a little smile. “Finally.” He thought.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Hopes

Fandom: Grishaverse, Six of Crows

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x reader

Summary: After getting hurt during a fight, Kaz is furious with (y/n), and she fears that her feelings could never be reciprocated.

A/N: I started writing this before I had read the book, so it was inspired by the Netflix series. Back then I had no idea the Crows are basically teenagers, and I headcannoned them to be around 25-26. So, sorry about that. Freddy being 28 makes it okay for me, otherwise I would never write for minors. Hope it’s alright :)

“Oh, he’s pissed.” (y/n) said as she quickly turned her gaze away from their boss and turned back to face the bar, Jesper´s cheery expression changed into a face of uncertainty. “How much?” The tall man asked, downing his drink. “On a scale of one to ten?” he asked when (y/n) didn’t answer immediately. (y/n) did not turn to face him, nervous of what was about to come. “Uuh... think about twenty-five.” She said, trying to disappear into her chair. “Who’s going first, you think?” Jesper asked, still also facing the bar in front of him, only his eyes shifting a little in her direction. Before she could answer, an angry thump of Kaz’s cane made the bar go quiet. “ (y/n) , with me.” He said loudly enough for the whole bar to hear. Her heart skipped a beat. “Make it thirty.” She whispered looking at Jesper as she slid down from her chair, grimacing at the sudden pain in her arm and lower back. Jesper remained seated and patted her shoulder in silence. She walked the walk of shame. The bar patron’s eyes followed her suspiciously, wondering what this beaten girl did to make the Bastard so furious. She walked slowly towards the stairs and up to the landing to meet him, trying not to seem in as much pain as she was in. 

When she reached him, limping a little, he simply walked over to his office, leaving the door open so she could follow him inside. She closed the door quietly behind herself, becoming painfully aware of her dirty clothes, of the still slightly bleeding gash across her arm and of the forming bruise on her forehead, which was making her head hurt. Kaz sat down behind his desk and watched her, saying nothing. She returned the gaze, at least for a while. It was hard to keep eye contact with him sometimes. His eyes were sharp and penetrating – it was like he could see what she was thinking. There was more silence. He was leaving her stew. She was hurting and she was tired, and he was angry. What a great combo. Just as she took in a breath to say something, to apologize, his voice boomed loudly across the room. “What were you thinking?! I´ve always thought you were the reasonable one.” He glared at her some more and interrupted her once again before she could say anything. “And don’t say you’re sorry, cause I know you’re not!” He said as if he’d read her mind once again. He watched her take in heavy breaths as she was trying to remain calm. She glared back at him. “They would have killed the girl!” She said, angry, but not raising her voice at him, she knew better than that, especially in this situation. “They almost killed you! And they would have if Jesper didn’t show up!” he yelled as he stood up and circled the desk. “Do you even know, who those people were? Not only did you put yourself and Jesper in danger, but possibly all of the Crows.” He said in a more quiet voice, which was just as intimidating as him shouting, perhaps even more. He came closer to her, still piercing her with his furious eyes. She turned away from him, feeling lost, but also realizing he was right. She did what she thought was right, saving an innocent girl, no older than sixteen, from being raped and murdered in a Ketterdam’s alleyway. She had no idea there were more than just the two men she saw harassing the girl. There were three more hiding around the corner. The young girl ran away the moment she saw an opening, and (y/n) took quite a beating before her gambler friend happened to walk past, quickly realizing who was in the middle of the brawl, when he noticed a flame flying towards one of the men. Jesper immediately shot the them. Unfortunately, one escaped. Her head was throbbing just thinking about the blow she received before Jesper showed up – it send her right to the ground – and Kaz’s yelling definitely did not help. The tears welling up in her eyes weren’t far from being shed. “I did what I thought was right.” She said quietly, still not facing him. “I know I shouldn’t have used the fire, I know I ought to stay hidden... And I may be a criminal Kaz, but I’m not going to stand and watch innocent people suffer when I can do something!” She said, finally deciding to look the tall man in the eye again. “So your plan is to let yourself be killed in their stead? How clever of you.” He snapped in her direction. That was the last straw. She thought she could handle being yelled at, but apparently with her whole body hurting, while also desperately and constantly hiding her feelings for the man, who appeared to direct all his anger at her right now, it was too much. She wanted nothing more than for him to tell her she did well, to stay by her side and hold her close, and as unrealistic as that was, she still hoped for something - for a reassuring word at least. But she knew Kaz was different. And she’s never seen him this angry; he basically called her dumb, reckless and incapable, and a thought crossed her mind that he might actually hate her. She suddenly had no energy to argue and let the tears fall. She though Kaz did not see, but the man was perceptive. Very much so. If she was as perceptive as he was, she might have noticed the shadow of regret that shot across Kaz’s features upon seeing her tears. She simply sucked up all that she had to say and only uttered through silent tears “Sorry boss, won’t happen again,” and made her way out of his office without looking back. He didn’t stop her. She closed the door softly and headed towards her room. After a few steps, she let out a desperate sob escape her throat. She couldn’t get the picture of his furious face away from her head.

“That... was harsh.” Inej said as she emerged from the shadows by the window in Kaz’s office. He only glanced at her, not even surprised she had been eavesdropping.  Kaz remained silent; very well aware he did not handle things the best. But he felt so angry! Angry at the men terrorizing people on the streets, angry at them for beating her up like they did, leaving her bruised, cut and beaten. But he was also angry at her, angry at the way she always tried to put others’ needs before her own, angry at her for hoping she could change this harsh world, and for giving him hope that something better might await him. Hope... Hope never saved anyone, never fed anyone... He was lost in his thoughts when Inej spoke again. “You should talk to her.” She simply said. “I just did.” Kaz remarked. “No, you scolded her like a little brat, Kaz. There are better ways to handle this.” She said coming closer to him. “What should I tell her then, hm? That I don’t want to lose another one of my investments?” He spat , but regretted it immediately, as he saw Inej flinch at the words. He sighed. “That I don’t want to see her smashed, dead face on the sidewalk one day? That I hate to see her, anyone of you, put yourselves into unnecessary danger?” He said, getting angry again, but also already feeling exhaustion settling in. “You know how they treat Grisha around here. Especially runaway ones.” He added. He didn’t want to lash out on her like he did. But he got scared, when he saw Jesper helping her limp inside the bar, blood covering most of the right sleeve on her light blue shirt. He got scared, and that’s what made him furious - the thought that he cared so much about her. “You could start with that.” She said. “But leave out the investment part.” She said and turned to leave again. He scoffed as she jumped out of his window. “She’s telling me how to deal with my employees, while being my employee herself.” He though and rubbed his eyes. “But they are much more than that, aren’t they? His Crows. She is much more than that.” He thought, and immediately hushed the last thought in his mind. He couldn’t let himself think about her this way. He couldn’t let her become his weakness. He couldn’t, yet he wanted nothing more. He saw the way she looked at him sometimes – like he was her hope. She never said anything, never wanted anything from him, but he realized what she was telling him with those glances. I’m here for you. I’m here, and I always will be. But how could he accept that? The Bastard of the Barrel, one of Ketterdam’s most notorious criminals, a ruthless monster. His mind was racing and he knew he should go talk to her. Check if she’s alright – there was blood on her. Saints, he should probably apologize. Him, Kaz Brekker, apologizing. He smirked at the thought, but there was pain in that expression. He couldn’t remember the last time his emotions got so mixed up, or when was the last time he properly acknowledged them. He sat down in an armchair near the fireplace and groaned quietly. He knew he needed to fix this, to go and see her, preferably talk to her. (y/n), a runaway Inferni, who lost all hope in the second army, in Grisha and their general, in everything she knew before Ketterdam – who, for some reason, regained that hope in him and his crows, a band of criminals. He decided to go to her room that night. He wasn’t sure how he would handle the conversation if she was still crying. He would try to talk to her. Hopefully, she wouldn’t hate him completely by then. Kaz completely forgot to scold Jesper. And as Kaz was about to walk towards her room, he saw Jesper walking in with bandages and water. He sighed, but still decided to limp there, not really knowing why. He wouldn’t talk to her while there was an audience.

The gunslinger walked quietly by Kaz’s office, hoping his boss wouldn’t hear him. On any other day, Kaz would register his presence and call him in, but not today. Jesper tiptoed towards (y/n)‘s room with a bowl of water and some clean bandages. He knew that after her conversation with Kaz she probably sat quietly in her room. Inej spared no details while telling him what had happened. He softly knocked on her door, but no-one answered. “I’m going in, I don’t care if you’re naked or sleeping.” He said quietly and opened the door. He was surprised she didn’t lock it, but was also glad he didn’t have to pick his own friend’s lock. She was sitting on the ledge of her window, still in her dirty clothes, blood drying on her skin. And she had been crying, he saw her profile, and her flushed cheek and puffy eye was enough to confirm it. “Oh darling.” He said, putting the bowl and bandages down and coming closer to her. She didn’t say anything as he came by her side. He squeezed her shoulder and moved his hand to caress her back lightly. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up. That slash won’t heal on its own.” Jesper said, trying to make her move away from the window. She slid down from the ledge and felt a shiver ran down her spine. It felt much colder than before. Jesper quickly closed the window and made her sit in the chair near her writing desk. “Talk to me.” He said simply. “I don’t think I want to Jes.” She said avoiding his gaze. She couldn’t tell him how good it felt, using her power again, and how all that spark got extinguished with the first harsh word Kaz had uttered. “Well, if you don’t want to unburden your heart to me, at least let me help you clean that nasty gash on your arm.” He said and started tugging at her blouse. She sighed and started unbuttoning the piece of clothing. “It’s not like I’ve never seen a woman before.” Jesper said with a grin, unable to not comment on the situation. She eyed him, suddenly more annoyed than sad and depressed. “I’m not naked under this thing. Saints, you really think I’m that easy?” She said, but continued to undo her buttons. “Of course not, love. Just teasing.” He continued grinning at her and it was contagious. She smiled lightly at him. “You’re my friend Jesper, but sometimes I’d just smack you right across your head.” She said, the mood easing a little bit.”Thank you, by the way.” She said suddenly. “You did save my life.” She said looking him in the eye. “Don’t mention it. I’m just returning the favour. You remember last month, right?” He said with a grin. She did remember. Jesper gambled and drank too much once again, nothing unusual. She put away the blouse and remained in a tight white undershirt. Jesper saw the deep slash on her arm and gagged a bit. “Sorry, I just...” He couldn’t finish and had to avert his eyes away from the wound. “Well, aren’t you a useless medic?” She said, the pain in her arm becoming more noticeable. “Sorry. I should have told Inej to go check on you.” He said. “It’s okay. Thanks for coming and bringing this stuff. How about I clean myself up and take care of this, before you faint in here? I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said her eyes still sad but at least she had something to occupy herself with  for a while.

Jesper was a little confused. He very much knew there were feelings involved on her part, he also thought that Kaz might not be indifferent, but the way these two behaved towards each other baffled him. “They’re keeping their distance.” Inej had said once, about a month ago, when their staring at one another was becoming unnerving. (y/n) left for her bathroom to clean herself and the wound, and he got up and hurried downstairs, back to the bar. But when he opened the door, Kaz was leaning on the opposite wall, head bowed down. He wasn’t sure what to say or do, so he remained silent and slipped past his boss. “Jesper.” He called after him. There was no anger in his voice. Jesper only stopped and turned around. “Yeah boss?” He asked as if nothing was peculiar about this whole situation. “How’s she?” Kaz asked, looking towards her room. “She... She’ll be fine. Just be gentle.” Jesper said carefully. Kaz didn’t say anything and only nodded.

He stood there, in front of her door, for quite some time, deciding what to say. He heard when she opened and closed her bathroom door, crossed the room and sat down on her bed, which he recognized by the squeaking mattress. He also noticed how the room lit up a little through the crack between the door and the floor. Others would have thought that she lit up a lamp. But he knew better by now. That’s what they agreed on, little flames to maintain her power, nothing suspicious.

(y/n) felt better after her clean up. She bandaged the wound at her arm and thankfully it didn’t need stitches. Her wet hair was dangling around her face. She summoned a little fire in her palm, carefully cradling it in her hands. She often did it when she was feeling down. It was a little remnant of who she truly was, of what she could do. It made her feel warm, which was all she needed at the moment, especially after Kaz’s cold words. She flinched a little, as the image of his angry face emerged in her mind once again. There was a soft knock at her door. “Yeah?” She called softly and quickly extinguished the golden flame.  The door opened and Kaz’s lean figure entered her room. He did meet her eyes, but only for a second. He closed the door behind him and immediately felt as if he made a mistake, seeing her private space, with her perched on her bed, in a loose nightgown, wet hair and flushed cheeks. Her cheeks always tinged pink after she had used her powers. “Kaz?” She asked when he didn’t seem about to start talking. Seeing him like this made all the anger go away. He seemed unsure. But as she said his name, he quickly regained his composure, grabbing his cane tighter and made a step towards her. “ (y/n), we should talk.” He said after a moment of silence. She got nervous again. She didn’t want to go through it again. She remained silent, watching him. She could see there was no more anger in his expression. Or at least only the usual amount. He sighed and walked over to the window. I can’t do this while looking her in the eyes. “I did not mean to react the way I did, (y/n).” He said, while still looking away from her. “But you need to understand that I – we – need you in one piece.” He said finally turning around, looking at her. She was still sitting on the bed with a stunned expression. It sounded awfully close to an apology. She wasn’t sure if she should speak up, but Kaz was saying nothing more. She got up from the bed and walked closer to him, but still far enough to not make him uncomfortable. “And I should’ve been more careful.” She said watching him. He turned to face her and only nodded shortly. “Does it hurt?” He asked looking at her bandaged arm.  “Not really. I’ve had worse.” She said smiling a little. It was clear that Kaz didn’t want to leave, not right at the moment. He wanted to say so many things and yet he had no idea how or if he even should. Her smile faltered. “Back in your office...” She started and Kaz looked out of the window again. Just like her, he would rather forget it ever happened. She thought about what to say. “I got a bit scared you might hate me.” She said following his gaze out into the street below, where a raggedy cat was making its way across. Kaz’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “It takes much more than one reckless fight to make me hate someone.” He said watching her face. “Especially you.” He dared to add. She watched him in disbelieve. “Thank you.” She said simply, but sincerely. He couldn’t wrap his head around it. She was thanking him for not hating her. Had he really set the bar so low? “I know I do get angry.” He said still keeping his eyes fixed on hers. She had the same awestruck expression as any other time when their eyes met for longer than a few seconds. “But I could never hate you.” There was a pause filled only with her heavy breathing. What is going on? “You mean too much to me.” His heart was beating fast, probably just as fast as hers. “You mean a lot to me too, Kaz.” She said quickly back, eager to get her emotions out there, since she realized how much of a struggle it must be for him. That wicked smile of his was again present on his face, but there was something softer in his eyes than usual. She smiled back at him and his heart fluttered inside his chest. He cleared his throat and forced himself to tear his eyes away from her. “You should rest.” He said suddenly, but his voice was calm and steady. She also looked away from his handsome face, her mind completely blank. “Yeah, you too. It’s been a long day.” She said. He simply looked at her again and made his way back to the door. “Good night, (y/n). I’ll see you tomorrow.” He simply said and looked at her with that softness in his eyes once again. She felt her heart beating rapidly. “I can’t wait.” She said sincerely. “Goodnight, Kaz.” She said and watched him limp down the hallway. He didn’t turn back, otherwise she would notice his cheeks going red. She closed the door, a little unsure if the conversation they just had was real. She climbed into her bed and tried to fall asleep, but it was hard knowing that something wonderful maybe waiting for her in the future. In her and Kaz’s future. But she did fall asleep, dreaming of deep, dark brown eyes, and how warm they could turn from time to time.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

As if

Fandom: Marvel, Loki series

Pairing: implied Loki x reader

Summary: While being stuck at the TVA, both Loki and (y/n) have some things to think about

AN: it’s just a  little blurb I came up with at work. No action, not much of a plot. Hope it’s okay :)

She watched the God of Mischief concentrate on the file on the table in front of him. There was a hint of confusion mixed with resignation in his eyes. She couldn’t see anything evil in those icy blue eyes, not anymore. The last couple of days – it were days, right? – they were forced to endure basic TVA training on the intricacies of branched timelines and the dangers of leaving them untreated. Loki’s whole demeanour changed after he realized the Tesseract, or any other infinity stone, didn’t work here, and also after watching the tape – his tape. What did he see? She wondered. “May I help you with anything?” Loki snapped at her, clearly annoyed. She just raised a questioning brow. “You’re starring, it’s exhausting.” He said, throwing an angry look her way. She looked away from him with a roll of her eyes. He was certainly still annoying, but also a completely different man than the one she fought and despised only a week or so ago. “What happened with you?” She asked him without really thinking about it much. “I beg your pardon?” He asked with wide eyes, clearly caught off guard by the question. “You’re not the same as when you were terrorizing New York. Still a pain in the ass, but... You’re different.” She commented trying to hold eye contact with the God. “I suppose that’s what happens to people when they find out there’s no free will in the universe.” He said after a while, looking back into the file. “But we do. We have free will. At least, now we do.” She said resting her elbows on the table. Loki, sitting opposite of her, watched her. There was a certain excitement in her eyes. “Ever since we broke away from the Sacred Timeline, we’re free, we’re off the script, aren’t we?” She asked him, actually interested in his opinion, as she kept thinking about it for hours. “Well, I would think so. It makes sense, but there’s a slight problem – we’re not free.” Loki said pointing at the collar at his neck. “True.” She admitted and shrugged uncomfortably. “But,” she said with a small wicked smile on her lips, one he’s never seen on her before. “If I were to make a mess around the library and the archive, nobody would know, not in advance. If I decided to punch you in the face for no reason just now, nobody would know and that’ because it’s not written anywhere. We’re free, see?” She said, smiling at her little discovery. He watched her for a moment. “I suppose you’re right.” He said simply and thought about it. Could he truly become someone else? Someone better, and not the villain he was destined to be? She wanted to say something about him agreeing with her, something about it being the first time, but as she saw his thoughtful expression, she decided against it and remained silent. How can a person change this much in a span of a couple of days - or was it weeks? “Loki?” She said and his heart skipped a beat at the gentle voice. He couldn’t remember when was the last time someone said his name without anger, or contempt or disappointment. His head snapped up with wide eyes and slightly open mouth. “What did you see on that tape?” She asked carefully. His demeanour changed once more. His face turned grim and he furrowed his brows. “Nothing that should concern you, mortal.” He barked at her and buried his nose back into the papers. As if he’s going to tell her he saw himself die at the hands of the Titan who made him do the things in New York. As if he’s going to tell her that he saw her kind eyes on many occasions on that tape. As if he’s going to tell her he saw the two of them exchange promises of love. As if he’s going to tell her that she was supposed to die just a couple of months before him. As if he’s going to tell her about the absolutely heartbroken man, screaming in agony and mourning his lover... As if... As if... As if he could ever fall in love with a mortal, with a Midgardian woman. He knew then that it was a different Loki, definitely not him. He would never. Yet the echo of her voice saying his name so peacefully, with actual care, remained stuck somewhere deep inside him.

His reaction was what made her decide she would ask Mobius to let her see her own tape. She had refused before, but now she was interested. Not the end though. She did not want to see the end...

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

What Happened in the Past and What the Future Holds

Fandom: Star Wars

Pairing: Poe x reader

Characters: you, Poe, Genereal Organa, couple of Poe´s friends

Summary: (y/n) is rather new at the base, but Poe quickly notices her. There is something about the girl that Poe cannot put his finger on until he asks the general. Eventually, (y/n)´s traumatic past comes to surface. What will happen next?

AN: be kind, it´s 1 am here

“Uhm.. General, I think I decoded the cipher from last week.” Poe heard a woman´s voice behind him. Usually, he wouldn´t pay any attention to it, but even from the one sentence he heard how insecure and nervous she sounded. He turned his head around to find the person. He was right, it was a young woman. She was blushing very slightly while general Organa took a look at the deciphered text she handed her. “Great work, lieutenant.” The general said and smiled at her and she smiled back, the nervousness still very visible in her face. Poe decided he liked the smile and examined her more closely. She was quite tall, had straight dark brown hair cut just slightly above her shoulders. But what really caught his attention were her large blue eyes. It wasn´t how beautiful those eyes were, but how sad they looked. Even though she looked down at the floor quite frequently, he noticed them.  He also noticed how strangely familiar the young woman seemed to him.

“Thank you, ma´am.” She smiled sheepishly and went off to work on something else, probably. “Hey, Poe! You still with us?” One of the other pilots sitting next to him asked, punching him slightly on his arm. “Yeah, sorry.” Poe said looking around him at his friends. “Saw you eyein´ the girl from communication.” The pilot continued. “Shut up Al. You know her?” Poe asked simply, not at all embarrassed from being caught staring. Al just laughed slightly, seeing that his friend is probably interested in the girl. “Not really. Calls herself (y/n). She joined the base a few months ago. Not very talkative if you ask me.” The pilot explained simply. “That´s ´cause nobody enjoys talking to you, Al.” Poe said to his friend. “Oh shut it Dameron.” The meeting was about to start and all of them went from joyous and loud to serious and invested in the cause.

(y/n) noticed the man looking at her. He basically pierced her with his dark eyes. She looked at him as she was returning to her post but he already turned back to talk to his friends. She knew who he was. Damn, everybody knew who he was. Commander pilot Poe Dameron, the best pilot in the Resistance nowadays. He was somewhat of a celebrity among the base, but people who knew him always said he´s just an easygoing and casual guy. But she saw the temperament in those eyes and she definitely wasn´t the only one. People respected him and he had no trouble to change from the friendliest guy you´ve ever met to the commander he was in a matter of a second. She didn´t think much of his gaze, because she knew the pilots´ reputation. They knew the dangers they were going into all the time and so some of them had the tendency to look for one night stands. (y/n) didn´t know which pilots, but it was better to generalize this idea. They were in a war after all. A cruel and unforgiving war.

General Organa was going to use the deciphered message at the meeting. It was a secret imperial code that many before (y/n) were trying to put their finger on. She felt like she just got lucky, because she had many notes from other people working on it. But she had to admit that she was the one who put the pieces together. And the fact that the general was going to use the message made her unbelievably nervous. What if there was a mistake? It could put other people´s lives in danger! She sat quietly at her desk full of notes and stared into the distance thinking about everything she could have done wrong. Thankfully she couldn´t think of anything. The sound of her name pronounced by the General from where the meeting took place made her wake up from her thoughts. The General merely mentioned that she was the one to finish the cipher, but a few glances turned her way. She blushed and hid behind her monitor and papers. After a minute (y/n) finally started working on other things she had to finish and stopped worrying about the code and the meeting happening not far from her.

It was nearly midnight when she finished all the reports from the previous off-world mission. Six of their people had died when the First Order´s soldiers attacked the team unexpectedly. She was only glad that she didn´t have to be the one to tell their loved ones, if they had any. (y/n) put the files into a pile, stood up and stretched her back. There was no one else in the room and it was quite dark, only some of the monitors lighting the space. She looked around, realizing how calm everything seemed. She sighed, suddenly feeling trapped and suffocating, the memories of her own team surfacing once again. She grabbed her data-pad and went quickly outside, wanting to feel the open space and cool night air around her. She took a deep breath once she was outside the base and sat down on the cold ground near where the tree-line started.  The memories were trying to get her down once again, she could almost hear the scream of her best friend before she disappeared forever. (y/n) suddenly felt stray tears escaping her eyes and she quickly wiped them, getting up again. The moment she stood up, she notice two figures walking around the X-Wings, not very far from where she was. She wiped her eyes again and quickly marched to the back door, keeping her head down, so she could get back inside, not paying attention to the two figures, who watched her as she moved in the shadows. A single strip of light has revealed her to the two observers.

“Isn´t that (y/n)?” Jessica asked her companion, when she noticed the person walking inside. ���Looks like it.” Poe commented. “You know her?” He asked. “Not really. I mean, we´ve talked. But she seems to keep to herself.” Jess said looking at Poe. “I heard something similar earlier today. Do you think she´s just shy or something happened?” Poe said, rather thinking out loud than actually talking to Jess. “I´m not sure...” Jess trailed off. “Why, you interested Poe?” She asked in a much more cheerful tone. Poe looked at her and raised his eyebrows in confusion. “What? No.” He said looking at the door in which (y/n) disappeared a few moments ago. “She just seems sad.”

Something triggered the bad memories inside (y/n)´s head that night, and she barely slept. The dark circles under her eyes that appeared there in the morning would easily give away her bad night. (y/n) sighed when she saw herself in the mirror. There was nothing to do about it, so she put on her uniform and went to work. She hoped there would be some challenging tasks today – translating or decoding would keep her mind occupied.

Poe also didn´t sleep very well, those big sad eyes he noticed on the girl seemed to keep him thinking. There was also the feeling that he had seen her somewhere before. When he got up the next morning, he decided he would find general Organa and ask her about the young woman. The debriefing that day was over quickly and Poe ran to the general straight after. “General. Sorry to bother you, may I ask you something?” He asked, not really sure of what he wanted to know. “Of course, is there something unclear for your next mission?” The general asked. “No, that´s not it.” Poe said thinking for a second. “I wanted to know – the girl from communication, (y/n), right?” Poe started and Leia nodded, knowing who he was talking about. “Who is she? I mean, she seems somehow really familiar and I noticed...” Poe said quickly and stopped himself before he might have sounded too foolish. “What did you notice, commander?” Leia tried to get him finish his sentence. Poe sighed and looked away for a fraction of a second. “I noticed how sad she looks.” He finished his thought as the general smiled weakly and nodded. “Come with me, Poe.” She gestured to him to follow her somewhere with less people. “You might remember that we had one small base on Af´El. There weren´t many people out there, but when the First Order decided to attack the natives because of the base, there was only one squadron left to stand up to them. And they did, they fought. But... only one member of the Azure Squadron survived.” Leia told Poe as he watched her with more disbelief after each word. “Are you telling me that this (y/n) is - is that (y/n)? But everyone thinks she´s also dead. Or MIA at least, right?” Poe asked bewildered. “Yes. There was nothing to go back to and after a couple of months looking for her, we did find her and she eventually joined our main base here. Her only wish was for no one to know about her and for her past to stay dead. Fresh start.” She said. Before Poe could say anything she stopped him with a finger in the air. “The only reason I´m telling you is that I trust you enough with this sensible information and because you yourself seemed to have noticed her. So, it´s better you know it from me than figuring it out yourself and doing anything reckless with the information.” Leia explained. “But that means she´s a pilot. And a damn good one.” Poe said as if excited. “Not anymore Poe. After what happened, she hasn´t even looked in the direction of an X-Wing.” Leia sighed and looked at him. “What do you need from me?” Poe asked, serious all of sudden as he realized what was coming. “I hate to do this. There aren´t enough pilots. Every one of them counts. We need her in the cockpit again.” She said simply. “You want me to persuade her to fly again?” He asked. “I want you to try. Unless her trauma is too big. Try to help her get her head out of it.” Leia said looking him in the eye. “Yes ma´am. I´ll do what I can.” Poe nodded.

(y/n) was tired all day. She hadn´t had nightmares and panic attacks for over two months now and she couldn´t really understand what had happened last night. She figured it had probably been the death reports. Her day was fortunately full of translating. When her shift was over, she picked up all her materials and notes and headed back to her quarters.  She made about five steps when a man stepped in front of her with a smile on his handsome face. It was no one else than the famous Poe Dameron. “Can I help you with that?” He asked pointing at the rather large pile of books and papers in her hands. “Thanks, but I think I´m...” Before she could finish the sentence two books from the top of the pile collapsed, but Poe was quick enough to catch them. “... okay?” He asked with a smirk. (y/n) returned the smile but Poe saw her tired expression. “Let me help you, alright?” He said, already taking more than half of the stuff. “Thank you. I´m a little drained today.” (y/n) said as she led the way to her room. “Didn´t sleep well?” He asked. “Something like that, yeah.” She smiled weakly again. He didn´t say anything to that as they continued down the corridor. “What even are all of these things?” Poe asked suddenly, reading something off of the top paper on the pile he carried. “Oh, it´s mostly just notes, dictionaries, grammar and such. Who would have guessed that you can get abs from translating, right?” She said still smiling. Poe chuckled at that. “I don´t understand a word of what is written in here.” Poe said looking at the paper. (y/n) leaned closer to look at what was written there. “That´s in Mando´a. The First Order uses some of it in their codes, just like the Empire did.” She explained looking at the floor rather than at him. “You´re a bit of a genius, aren´t you?” Poe asked in a reaction. “I never thought how difficult it is to decode anything.” He said. “I wouldn´t call myself a genius. I just had a lot of time to practice languages and learned lots of types of codes when I... Before I got here.” She said flashing him a smile again, but he noticed the difference in her expression. “Thank you for your help, commander.” She said as she stopped in front of her room´s door. “Oh, it´s nothing. And call me Poe. No need to be professional all the time.” He said as he extended his hand to her. “I´m (y/n). Pleasure to meet you Poe.”  She said and shook his hand. “The pleasure´s all mine.” He said and flashed her one of his famous grins. (y/n) felt the blush creeping to her cheeks. She turned around and opened the door, taking her stuff from Poe. “Thanks again.” She smiled, looking him in the eye for a second. “See you around.” She said and stepped inside her quarters. “Yeah, see ya, (y/n).” He said and turned around to leave.

Poe couldn´t stop thinking about how well she hid her pain. Her smiles seemed so sincere. He had lost people before, he knew how it hurt and that it left scars. But he couldn´t imagine what must have happened to her, so that she had given up flying. He knew he could never do that. With these thoughts on his mind he fell asleep that night, dreaming of a sad smile and strange words on paper.

The next few days went in a calmer matter. Poe was thinking about his plan, how he should approach (y/n) and try to get her to flying. He had this pleasant feeling when he thought about her, but he felt strange getting to know her only because of the general´s wishes. He decided he would see how far he would get without admitting the original purpose. There was nothing else to do with this matter anyway.

(y/n), on the other hand, couldn´t deny how drawn she felt to the commander. It wasn´t wise, she knew, but maybe she needed this simple distraction. She stole glances at him for the next two days every time he was near her working place or in the briefing room. They passed each other in the corridors of the base on several occasions and greeted each other every time. But that was about it.

Once they met outside the base. It was a late morning and (y/n) just needed to find one of the mechanics to give him some reports and on her way back she stumbled into the pilot. Neither of them had much to do that day and they spent about an hour just talking. (y/n) learned that he was from Yavin 4, that his favourite colour was dark blue and that the smell of him was even more intoxicating than she had previously thought. On the other hand Poe learned that she loved Fathiers but hated how people used them and that his favourite shade of blue probably shifted into the light one of her eyes. Especially, when a smile reached them. After that Poe found himself thinking about her more often. And not in terms of his assignment. This kind of conversation between them happened two more times. It was during the second one Poe realized he might be falling for the young woman before him. (y/n) wasn´t any better, blushing madly at every one of his compliments, regarding her looks, her work or even her taste in books.

One evening roughly around dinner time, (y/n) went to the cantina to grab some food. She looked around trying to find a free spot to sit but couldn´t find any. Suddenly she saw someone waving at her from one of the tables further back. It was Poe and a part of his squadron – about seven people in total. He gestured for her to sit with them. She felt uneasy and slightly nervous, the place a little too crowded for her. But she started walking in their direction anyway. Jessica was the only other person at the table (y/n) knew. “Hi (y/n). Come join us.” Poe said with a smile making a bit of space for her. “Hi everyone. Thanks. The place´s crowded tonight.” (y/n) said sitting on Poe´s left hand side. Poe saw she was a bit nervous as he introduced his friends to her. But she smiled and greeted everyone before giving Poe a warmer smile than she gave anyone else. “Good work with the message before. I heard it was a tough one and it sure saved a couple of lives during the mission.” One of the pilots said to her after a while. “Thank you. But it wasn´t just me, I had a lot of help from the others in communication.” She smiled unable to keep eye-contact for very long. “She´s just being modest. I saw her translations a couple of days before – this girl is a genius.” Poe smiled at her and the others laughed when they saw her blush. She didn´t say anything but tried to smile again. “How did the mission go anyway? I haven´t seen the reports yet so I don´t know much.” (y/n) asked trying to change the subject. “Thanks to you, we knew what we were going into.” Jessica said. “Yeah, we flew there, destroyed the outpost and got back safely. Only Al got a little burned, but that´s nothing special.” Poe said teasing his friend. “Shut up Dameron.” Al said, punching Poe in the shoulder as everyone laughed. (y/n) also laughed as Poe pretended having his feelings hurt by such a display of violence. The sound of her laughter made him feel proud inside. He looked at her and their gazes locked for a second before one of the other pilots spoke up again. “What about you (y/n)? Have you ever sat in an X-Wing before?” He asked looking at her curious. (y/n)´s smile faded more than quickly and so did Poe´s when he realized what damage this topic might cause right now.  “I... well... I have. But it´s a long time ago.” She said simply not looking at anyone. “Really? That´s great! How did you get to it?” He asked clearly interested. She was silent for a few seconds before she felt the familiar strangling feeling inside her chest once again. She quickly stood up. “I´m sorry. I just remembered I have to do something. Have a nice rest of the evening.” (y/n) said and hurried away, throwing away the remains from her dinner. The room seemed even more crowded suddenly and (y/n)´s head was beginning to spin. Every flash of light remained her of an explosion, every little noise became much louder than before. Tears of panic spilled from her eyes as she tried to get away from the mess hall as quickly as possible. She was almost out when a strong hand caught her by her upper arm and dragged her further away from the crowd.

Poe needed to do something. The others only shrugged when (y/n) left in such a hurry, but since Poe knew her story he ran after her. He realized she might actually need some help. He found her near the exit, shaking violently, keeping her head down as she was trying to make her way out. He approached her and swiftly dragged her out into the empty corridor. “(y/n), hey.” He said still holding her arm. She looked as if she couldn´t hear him, looking across the floor. “Can you hear me? Hey, (y/n)?” He asked gently, stroking her hair away from her face. Her breathing calmed down a little. She looked up at him slowly, a little confused. “Poe?” She just asked. “Yeah, it´s me. Are you feeling okay?” He asked holding her by her shoulders. (y/n) suddenly realized what had happened and she looked at him for a second horrified. “I´m f-fine. I just need to do something.” She said faking a smile and looking down the corridor. “The only thing you need is to get into bed and rest. I know a panic attack when I see one.” Poe said quietly. She looked away, her tears threatening to spill once again. “It´s alright. I´ll get you there.” Poe put his arm around her shoulders and led her to her room. She was silent the whole time and she kept looking at the floor embarrassed. He let her go by her room and as she entered the code, Poe came closer to her. “I could stay with you if you want. I just feel I shouldn´t leave you alone right now.” He said as she stepped inside avoiding his gaze. “Thank you. But that – that´s not necessary.” She said quietly. “Are you sure?” He asked, but it seemed she wasn´t going to answer. He was about to wish her good night when she took a step closer. “No.” She said still looking away.  “I´m not sure.” She sighed. “Then I´ll stay the night. If that´s okay with you?” She nodded.  “But promise, you´ll talk to me.” Poe said suddenly when he stepped inside her room. She took a deep breath. “I don´t know if I can.” (y/n) admitted. “But I guess I have to try.” Poe smiled at her, closing the door behind him. “I- um... Can I get you something?” (y/n) asked, suddenly trying to seem calm and cheerful. Poe realized she was used to this act. “How about you get into something more comfortable and I find us something warm to drink.” He suggested. “Poe...” She wanted to protest. “I signed up to help, didn´t I?” Poe said with a soft smile. She returned the smile and walked away to change her clothes.

She was sitting beside him on the small couch in her room. (y/n) looked much calmer now than a few minutes ago. She also looked terribly tired. “You don´t have to do this Poe. I don´t want to keep you away from your friends.” (y/n) said looking into her mug. “For the last time – I´m here voluntarily. And since you actually let me in, you won´t get rid of me that easily.” He joked and she smiled. “So, do you think you can tell me what happened in the mess hall?” Poe asked sounding more serious. “You said it. A panic attack. It´s been a couple of months since I had one. I guess I´m just a little on edge lately.” She answered turning to him slightly. “Do you know what caused it?” He tried to ask questions without revealing what he knew. “Yes.” She said. Poe was silent and kept looking at her. “You want to know, right?” She chuckled sadly and put her cup down. “If you think you can do it.” He said. “I was a pilot before.” She blurted out. “My squadron got into a battle and -” Her voice trembled and she sighed. Poe´s first instinct was to put his hand over hers in support. “They all died.” She wiped away her tears with her free hand. “I saw my best friend die... And a few seconds after that I crashed... And I didn´t know if anyone else was gone.” She sobbed and Poe´s grip on her hand tightened. “I lived in the dark for two months before the Alliance found me again on that stranded planet. After they´d told me, everything crumbled... All hope I had, had been crushed. I didn´t want to come back. But General Organa persuaded me. So here I am.” She said as she smiled sadly at the end, looking at Poe. “(y/n), I´m so sorry.” Poe breathed out. There was a moment of silence. Poe felt bad that he already knew some of the things that had happened to her. He felt as if he should really apologize and actually tell her about it. He didn´t want to make her fly anymore, he just wanted her no to feel so... broken. “(y/n)...” He said still holding her hand lightly. “I think I should...” He wasn´t sure how to say it, so he decided to go for it. “You were part of the Azure Squadron, weren´t you?” She suddenly drew her hand away from his, her eyes widening. “What?” She asked shocked. “I´m sorry, (y/n) - ” Poe started but she jumped to her feet covering her face for a second. “How? No one knows. How do you know?” She said her voice trembling on the verge of tears. “I... I thought I recognized you from somewhere. And when I asked the general, she told me...” He explained. “She just told you?” She asked, the hurt in her voice stinging Poe straight in the chest. He screwed up, he could see that now, he should´ve waited. But since he´s already started, he also needed to finish. “She told me, because she believes you should fly again.” Poe explained, immediately realizing the bad timing of such a request. She nodded with a heartbreaking smile on her face. The tears found her way out of her eyes. “I think you should go, Poe.” She said, looking down, her expression emotionless. “(y/n)...” Poe wanted to say something more, to justify himself, but he knew that it was too late. “No! You used me! I poured my heart out in here, even though you already knew all of it! I feel like a complete fool. Tell the General, I´m never touching an X-Wing or any other ship again.” She said her voice breaking. Poe wanted to say something, but she didn´t let him. “Please. Go.”It hurt her saying this, but she felt so miserable at the moment that she just didn´t want to see him. Poe turned to leave as he didn´t want to upset her anymore. Before he entered the hallway he turned to her for the last time. “I didn´t mean to hurt you. I´m sorry.” He said and left feeling absolutely stupid. The door slid closed behind him and (y/n) felt a wrenching sob escaping from her lips. That accident seemed to just keep on destroying her life.

“General. May I talk to you?” (y/n) marched to her superior, her eyes still a bit puffy from the heartbroken crying. “Of course, lieutenant. What´s wrong?” She asked immediately when she saw her expression. “Why did you do it, ma´am? Why did you send commander Dameron to do that?” (y/n) asked, feeling her nerves more and more on edge. “One thing I´ve sworn to never do again was to fly...” She couldn´t continue. Leia came closer to her, leading her to a chair as they both sat down. “(y/n), I am sorry. I had no idea how bad it is. I hoped if you had enough time, you´d come back to being a resistance pilot. There are only so few of them.” Leia looked at her and clasped her shoulder tightly. “I cannot do it ma´am. I failed too hard. I could never...” She sighed and looked down again. “What happened wasn´t your fault.  You need to realize that.” There was a moment of silence. (y/n) shook her head. “It was because of me Nooa died.” (y/n) sobbed again. In that moment Poe almost stepped into the room where the two women talked. He stopped himself and was about to leave, but his curiosity stopped him from walking away and he listened. “No. It was because of your X-Wing´s malfunction. You know that.” Leia calmed her. “But it´s my fault I didn´t see the error in the system. Those people were my family for almost two years and they all died because of one stupid system-error!” She cried and sobbed again. “You´ve spent so much time alone after the accident. I understand how crushed you were after you were told. How your hope disappeared in a blink of an eye. Anyone would be destroyed by that. I´ve been there too. But trust me, there´s always a way out of this darkness.” Leia smiled gently at her. “You don´t understand, general. I don´t deny that I´m broken, but being a pilot means working in a team. And I cannot be the part of the team that fails again – because of a system error or my own. No more people can die because of my mistakes.” She said sighing and looking at the floor. “If there is any way I can help you, (y/n), please tell me.” Leia touched her hand again. “Thank you, general, but I think I´m just going to get some rest. Thank you for talking to me.” (y/n) got up before Leia could answer, tears in her eyes again. Her eyes found Poe´s when she left the room, but before he could say anything she looked down again and stormed off.

Poe didn´t know what to do. He was sure (y/n) was still angry at him, even more now, when she saw him eavesdropping on her and Leia. He started to think of another plan.

(y/n)´s whole heart hurt. Just saying her friend´s name aloud was painful, but truly admitting her reasons for not flying hurt her even more. (y/n) herself properly realized them in the moment she said them out loud. She has always thought the main reason she gave up flying was the  trauma from the death of her friends in the explosions of their X-Wings, her almost fatal crash – all being her fault. But she started realizing it was also the fear of the future – what if it happened again? All these thoughts swam around her head as she tried to fall asleep.

The next morning felt strange. (y/n) realized it was because everything that had happened last night seemed as more of a dream. It was the first time since the accident she spoke so openly about it. Something has been lifted off of her chest – not completely, but definitely partially. After she got out of the shower she noticed a note has been slipped under her door.

“(y/n), I´m terribly sorry for everything that happened last night. I never meant to hurt you in any way and neither did the general. I think that neither of us realized in how much pain you are. I want you to know that even if you decide to keep your past a secret, and avoid all ships for the rest of your life, there are dozens of people who know about the Azure Squadron and who hold Commander Nooa and Captain (y/n) as their heroes. There was not a single person who thought that the Squadron´s death was Captain (y/n)´s fault. Not a single person. I would like to start over if you´d want that – as friends. From the moment I saw you handing General the decoded message. I would have approached you even without the orders to do so. You´re a capable and brave person. You´re not broken.

PS: You know what they say when you fall of a Fathier?

Poe.”

... “You should get straight back into the saddle...” (y/n) whispered. She needed to find him. He was a good person and he tried to help her. She didn´t want to lose his friendship because of what had happened. Maybe she should also start over. Not only with Poe but in general. Facing her past properly. She ran out to find the famous black X-Wing. (y/n) knew he was supposed to go away on a mission for a couple of days. She didn´t want him to leave feeling miserable because of her. When she finally found the ship, she also noticed a mop of black curls in front of it. “Poe!” She shouted and ran towards him with the note still in her hand. He turned around terrified for a moment that his note had made it even worse. But the small smile on her lips made him relax. “Morning, (y/n).” He greeted her grinning, but she saw there was a tiny bit of nervousness hidden behind it. “I´m so sorry, Poe. I was mean to you and you didn´t deserve it.” She said and started looking down again. He put his finger under her chin and made her look him in the eye. “You were reasonably angry. But I want you to know that I´m here for you, okay? We can talk about everything when I get back, how about that?” He smiled at her. She nodded. “Hey Dameron, you leaving or what?” Someone shouted at Poe. He turned around and shouted back. “Gimme a minute!” When he turned back around (y/n) mustered all her courage and stepping on her tip toes, she quickly kissed him into the corner of his mouth. “Promise you´ll return.” She whispered and stepped away as quickly as she leaned in. Poe´s jaw slacked a little. He didn´t expect this from her at all. When he realized what had happened he quickly grabbed her, pulling her close, one hand on her waist, the other sneaking its way behind her neck. He inspected her eyes for any sign of unease. When he could see nothing but adoration and hope in those eyes, Poe kissed (y/n) fully on her lips and she more than quickly melted into his touch. The kiss was over before either of them wanted, but everyone could see them and Poe still had a mission to go on. He leaned his forehead on hers. “I promise.” He said, and she smiled blushing. “You better. Because you´re right. I want to get back into the saddle. But I might need some help.”

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

The Watch

Fandom: The Walking Dead

Pairing: None

Characters: (y/n), Negan, Rick

Summary: (y/n) is asiggned to watch over Negan, who is held captive in the tiny prison in Alexandria. AN: I haven´t seen the last season, since the show is starting to get rather shitty, but this is a little something I wrote a couple of months ago to vent my hatred for Negan. No matter how charismatic that asshole is I just hate his guts.

„So you´re taking the watch tonight? What did you do to earn this?” Negan asked with what he thought was his perfect smile plastered on his face, but this time it didn´t look as joyful as usually. (y/n) just glared at him, her expression emotionless. “I guess I can stomach your presence without murdering you straight away, which you can´t say about everyone here.” She said without looking at him and put down the water and food that she´s brought. “Damn girl, you´re getting tougher and tougher every time I see your pretty face.” He said still smiling. She looked at him, hatred pouring from her eyes. “That´s what happens when you murder people´s families. Everyone will put up a fight eventually.” She said looking him in the eye fearlessly. He starred back but decided not to say anything. “Here´s your food, drinking water and some water so you can clean up. There are two more people up there so don´t think about trying anything.” (y/n) instructed him and opened the cell door. She brought the water and food inside, putting it down again and started to walk out slowly. Before she could reach for the cell door to close them behind her, Negan grabbed her by the neck and slammed her against the wall. She grunted and clenched her teeth at the sudden impact. “I could strangle you right here and now, sugar.” He said flashing his smile at her once again. What he didn´t know was that she was ready for this exact situation. “You sure?” She asked, almost whispering as she brought the point of her knife a little deeper into the skin of his abdomen. He looked down at the small speck of red growing a little bigger. “I can´t believe my two fucking eyes.” He said as he let her go immediately. She knew he wouldn´t kill her, not with Rick and Michonne standing upstairs, heavily armed.  He was just testing her. While he examined the tiny cut, (y/n) walked out of the cell and locked the door behind her. Then she felt his eyes on her again. Suddenly Rick walked down the stairs. “Everything alright? I heard some noise.” He asked only glancing if the prisoner was where he was supposed to be. (y/n) just looked at him and nodded. “Can I have a plaster for this?” A voice called behind the two and they saw Negan pointing at his stomach. “Cause this girl is a fucking animal.” Rick started marching down the room to either punch him or to say something, but (y/n)´s gentle hand stopped him. He looked down at her a little confused. “Everything´s alright. I´ll see you in the morning okay? Get some sleep.” She said softly, seeing that Rick was tired and on edge. He kept looking at her. “You sure?” Rick asked. “I am. Now go.” She said squeezing his arm. “Fine, call if you need anything.” He said, patted her on her shoulder and walked out. “We´ll behave, don´t worry.” Neither Rick or (y/n) reacted to his remark. She just sat down on the chair opposite the cell door, mentally preparing herself for a sleepless night next to a crazy man.

Some time went by in silence – thank god. But then he opened his mouth again. “I still can´t help but wonder – why keep me alive? All of you wanted to kill me for so long and then you just dump me down here?” (y/n) thought about what to say, or if she should say anything at all. “I still want to kill you.” She answered finally. “Then why don´t you?” He asked again coming closer to the door. His voice sounded different from his usual cocky tone. “I promised I wouldn´t.” She said and she felt the anger building inside her. “It´s not just that, is it?” He said sounding more like himself again. “Killing you in a fight? I´d love to be the one to do it.” She said and got up. “But killing people who cannot defend themselves, which you can´t right now? That´s not what we do. That´s why we´re different from you. Why we´re better.” She explained and turned her back to him. “You don´t care what people have to say. You don´t care why they do the things they do. You gave up on humanity. You´re not even human anymore.” She said quietly. “You´re just another monster in our way.” She said feeling the lost of her friends once again stabbing her in the heart. “I could say the same thing about you – that you´re just standing in our way.” He started. “No!” She shouted. “You don´t get to reason with me! Not after what you did! You have the blood of my best friend, of my family on your hands! And the worst thing? There was no reason for them to die. I don´t care about your great scheme and plans. There – was – no – reason.” She said, tears streaming down her cheeks as she stood in front of him, the cell door the only thing between them. He stayed silent, visibly angry. She tried to calm herself as she sat down on her chair. “You destroyed so many people´s lives... I hope it´ll haunt you if it doesn´t already.” She said closing her eyes for a second. Negan just stood there watching her angry and confused at the sudden outburst. (y/n) saw him standing there and realized that this was going to be one hell of a long night.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Bullets and Bruises

Fandom: Deadpool (2)

Pairing: Cable x reader

Characters: (y/n), Cable, Domino, Wade

 Summary: The two didn´t start off well, with Cable actually shooting (y/n). But things change when Cable eventually joins the team. Or do they? A bit of build up I guess, but otherwise just fluff.

AN: I suck at summaries, sorry. But anyway, since everyone seems to be thirsting after Cable (me included), I wrote a little something

As quickly as (y/n) could teleport, this time she wasn´t quick enough. One bullet hit her right thigh and the other scratched her left shoulder. “Shit.” Neena breathed out when she noticed the blood and immediately ran to try to take the time traveller down. “Get out of here. We´ll finish him.” She barked in her direction. “You sure?” She asked standing up, trying to shoot the man herself but to no vain. “Luck´s on my side. Now go!” She said ducking just before the man could punch her in the face. Where could she go? Not to Weasel´s, that place would give her infection much sooner than anywhere else. Since (y/n) knew that Wade got all his stuff back at Al´s place, she decided it would be the best for now as she didn´t want to go to the mansion just now. Too much explaining would await her there.

She appeared in Al´s tiny apartment with a thud as she couldn´t stand on her legs. “Who´s there?!” Al shouted in her general direction. “Just me, Al. (y/n).” She answered and saw the old woman putting down her gun. “I told you not to jump in here like this! You´ll give me a heart attack one time!” She said and went to sit down on the couch. “Sorry. Got no other place to crash at the moment, kinda need to sew myself up and I know that Wade has all his stuff here anyway.” She explained and slowly got up. “You hurt?” She asked not even surprised. “Two bullets... One in, one out. Now if you´ll excuse me, I´ve got some torture to do on myself.” (y/n) said and dragged herself to Wade´s room. “You should be more careful, girl, you ain´t healing like that crazy son of a bitch.” She said, sounding more serious now. “I know.” (y/n) said and sighed, closing the door behind her. Her shoulder only needed cleaning and maybe three of four stitches, but the other bullet stayed in her thigh, pretty deep too. She decided to work on her shoulder first, because she knew she might pass out from the pain of getting the bullet out. She looked around the room and finally found the bottle of whiskey she was looking for. “That´ll do.” She took the bottle and poured herself not a double, but a triple.

The shoulder was done quickly. But as soon as she started taking out the bullet in her thigh she screamed in pain. Eventually she managed to get it out while screaming and sobbing out in pain. But the worst part was behind her after that. And just as she predicted, when she relaxed slightly after the pain, she felt herself passing out.

A door being opened harshly and a couple of voices brought her back to consciousness. Suddenly Neena busted into the room. “Oh god.” Was all she said when she saw the blood covered sheets, bottle of whiskey and medical equipment around her. “She alive?” Wade asked from the living room. “Yeah, she´s just waking up, she probably passed out.” Neena called back at him. “Yeah, she did.” (y/n) said, groggily dragging herself to sit. “You okay?” Dom asked coming closer. “I will be, just need to sew this little bitch that made me pass out. I´ll kill that asshole if I ever see him again.” (y/n) mumbled and reached for the needle again. “What about you? You two are okay?” She asked “More or less...” Neena said scrunching her nose. “Well, not a scratch on you – how surprising. What´s up with Wade?” She eyed Neena. “Sew yourself up before you see him, or you might pass out again.” She said. “She´s right!” Wade shouted. “I´m not even asking anymore.” (y/n) said and started working on her leg.

A couple of days passed, (y/n) ´s wounds were healing and Wade´s legs were growing back. Poor Althea had no idea what was sitting right next to her on the couch. Suddenly she heard footsteps followed by a short yell, which repeated once more – Weasel and Dopinder stopped by. (y/n) couldn´t bother getting out of her – well, Wade´s – bed. Neena joined the group in a while. But then a fourth person´s footsteps were heard and that started to seem suspicious.  So she listened. She knew something was going on and when Wade started talking about how he´s going to use all the parts of the time travelling man´s body, (y/n) realized to whom the fourth footsteps belonged. She quickly grabbed her gun, checking if she had enough bullets. She teleported into the living room – right behind the man with the metal arm. He had his hands up, but she still put her gun very close to his head. She didn´t say anything and just glared from Cable to Wade. Even after the others put their guns away, she kept her own in the same level. “You can put that thing down now.” He growled at her, clearly not enjoying having a gun this close to his head. “Tell that to the hole in my leg and shoulder.” She barked back. Everybody looked at her, persuading her that it´s probably alright by now. She sighed and put her gun away, stepping in front of the man to join her friends. “Sorry about that.” He said trying to sound sincere. She didn´t say anything. This was the first time she took a proper look at him. And for the first time she noticed he didn´t look evil. Scary, sure, but not evil. His eyes gave him away. Cable noticed the change in her expression, she went from angry and scornful to understanding and curious in a matter of a second. Could she read him this quickly?

After Cable explained what he wanted to do and agreed to give Wade a chance to help Russell, she saw a completely different person standing in front of them. After he left, Weasel, Dopinder and Neena followed soon after. (y/n) was about to go back to her room, since her leg was starting to hurt again, Wade started speaking. “Crushing much? You´re a pervy little thing, going for a guy who almost killed you, didn´t know you´re into that.” (y/n) just rolled her eyes. “We´ve all lost someone, it was just really evident in him.” She explained. Wade sighed remembering Ness and (y/n)´s own loses. He sighed a little and nodded. She turned on her heel and went to her room. “But still, I get it, if I had a chance I´d get that ass!” He called after her and she only gave him the finger when turning to the room.

Eventually, everything they planned had worked out, with only one exception. Cable couldn´t go back to his family. But he seemed content with knowing that they are safe and that he could make some things right back in this time.

Almost two years have passed since that whole escapade, (y/n)´s bullet wounds only small pink scars now. The whole team moved into the X-men mansion, it was easier that way and most of them didn´t have a proper place to stay anyway.

(y/n) got a bit closer to Cable.  He wasn´t very outgoing and she was rather shy and quiet when she was around the others in the mansion – Unlike Wade and Neena who felt the constant need to talk to anyone they met. (y/n) would lie if she said she didn´t feel anything towards the man. They seemed to understand each other and, well, he was extremely handsome. Gorgeous. Hot. Well you know... He also helped her with training, since she never had any proper one. The fact that he didn´t find her personality as annoying as Wade´s helped a lot. They both knew when the other felt like talking and when it was better to stay silent. The post-work out talks were always nice for her. They were sincere even if they lasted for just a couple of minutes before they both headed for shower.

During their training sessions, her teleportation skills were very helpful, and at first she used them to her advantage to take Cable or Wade down. But Cable was quick to learn her tricks. Or so he thought. This time he made a mistake. He was sure she would appear in front of him and just as he brought his fist down she appeared on his right side, her left temple immediately colliding with his human fist. She yelped in surprise and pain and Cable was quick enough to catch before she could hit the ground and hit herself even more. “Jesus, (y/n), I´m so sorry. Look at me.” He said shocked, as helped her sit down on the ground and knelt beside her, one hand holding her around her shoulders the other cradling her face in his palm, examining the injury. “I´m really glad it wasn´t your other hand.” She said blinking up at him, her head feeling as if it was split in too. “I´m so sorry, doll, I had no idea you would appear there. I was counting on your usual strategy. Can you stand? I´ll get you to the infirmary.” He asked and started helping her up. “I´ll be fine, just... let me catch my breath. And no infirmary, Colossus would make a fuss.” She said holding onto him trying to keep the floor from moving. “I guess you´re destined to hurt me.” She chuckled, still looking down, her head spinning. “Well, I hope the fuck not.” He growled angry at the remark. “Come on, if you don´t want to go to the infirmary, my room is the second closest place. I don´t think you´ll be up to any more training today, huh?” He asked trying to keep her focusing on him. He was scared she might pass out on him. He picked her up gently and carried her away from the gym. “I´m not gonna pass out, you know. I can walk.” (y/n) said, as if reading his mind and she was suddenly too aware of how close they were to each other. “We´re almost there, it´s okay.” He answered, but his voice sounded a little different. A bit strangled. He let her down and opened the door to his room. He gestured for her to go in, keeping a hand on her back in case she was about to fall.  He led her to his armchair and let her sit down in it. Then he suddenly disappeared into the bathroom, only to come back again with a bottle of disinfection and a clean towel. He knelt down beside her and started to clean the little cut that the impact had caused. She looked at him, studying his face while he worked. It felt different, him being so gentle with her.

“I´m so sorry, (y/n). I´m a fucking idiot.” He said not looking her in the eye. She saw his worried expression. He was clearly angry with himself.  “Nate, I´m fine. It´s not your fault.” She rarely used his real name, but when she did, he knew she meant what she said. He stopped what he was doing and looked at her. “The last thing I want is to see you hurt, and yet it´s always me who hurts you. Whenever I see those scars I feel horrible.” He said and pointed at the scar on her shoulder left by the bullet. She didn´t know what to say. She put her hands on his cheeks. “Stop blaming yourself. Accidents happen, I´m fine.  And this?” (y/n) also pointed at the scar. “That´s how we met – a little unconventional, I know. But still...” She said looking at him gently almost forgetting the splitting headache when she saw his gentle eyes. He starred back at her for a second as if a little shocked by what she just said. “And remember I´ve also caused you a bruise or two.” She smiled at him, trying to break the silence and the corners of his mouth suddenly also twitched up a little before his face got worried again. “I´m still sorry. It´s gonna leave one hell of a bruise.” He commented, moving his right hand to rest on the back of her head to check for any more injuries. The tension between them was starting to be tangible. Both of them could feel it, but none of them seemed to want to do the first step. She leaned into his hand and closed her eyes. She heard him suck in a breath. And in that exact moment Wade decided to burst the door open yelling. “What the fuck happened?! Is she alright?” Both, (y/n) and Cable sighed and glared in the direction of the intruder. Then he got up and the warmth of his hand disappeared. “I´m fine Wade. Just a little accident.” She mumbled in his direction. “Now if you could get lost, it would be really nice.” She snapped at him. Her head started to hurt again from his yelling and she felt a bit angry at him for ruining the moment. “Oh, you two were in the middle of the nasty? About fucking time, I must say, but if you ever touch her again, I´ll make a meat loaf out of you. I mean you can touch her all you want just don´t use so much force I guess - ” He couldn´t finish the sentence as Cable pushed him out of the room and shut the door closed. “Fucker.” He muttered under his breath and she chuckled a little. Then there was silence again and she got up. There was no reason for her to sit there awkwardly now. “I guess I should go now. Don´t want to intrude on you.” (y/n) looked up at him. “You never intrude.” He said coming closer to her. Her heart was beating fast. His expression was unreadable. “Can I do something for you? I still feel like a total asshole.” He said. She took a step closer and looked down at his hands before taking one of them into her own. “I think you can. You can actually do something for both of us.” (y/n) didn´t know where did her courage come from, maybe it was the throbbing headache, maybe all the pent up feelings. He seemed to catch on as he smiled playfully at her. “And what would that be?” Her eyes glanced at his lips and that was the only further invitation he needed and he closed the gap between them. Cable gently put his metal arm around her waist and caressed her hair with the other. She snaked her arms around his neck and up to his hair. He growled at the contact. It would be an understatement to say that they were both touch starved. The kiss deepened and both of their hands started to roam each other´s bodies. When they parted for air, Cable rested his forehead on hers and closed his eyes, sighing contently. “I´ve dreamed of this for months.” He said, finally opening his eyes to see (y/n) smiling gently at him. “Me too.” She said simply, pecking him on the lips once more. “But I think I might need an aspirin or something.” She chuckled and pointed at her head.  He realized that she must still be in pain and he kissed her forehead before going to grab a bottle of pills from his table.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Lost and Found

Fandom: The Walking Dead

Pairing: a tiny bit of Daryl x reader

Characters: (y/n), Paul “Jesus” Rovia, mentions of Daryl and Rick

Summary: Imagine (y/n)´s lost her way, both literal and in her life after the prison fell, leaving her alone and hurting. Paul has found her almost dying and has taken her to Hilltop. After some time she begins to realize what she did wrong and wants to find her family again.

Author´s note: Again, sorry for any mistakes! Enjoy! :)

(y/n) was washing the dishes, when she heard familiar footsteps approaching her. She tried to concentrate on the bowl she was holding, maybe scrubbing it a bit too roughly. She knew what was about to happen. The footsteps stopped, probably two meters behind her. After a few second, the person came to her left side into her field of vision and leaned against the wall. “I don´t want to talk about it, Paul.” (y/n) said without looking at him. “I´m very much aware of that. But you should. Something is haunting you so much you wanted to leave Hilltop last night. I´m here to help.” He said sincerely, trying to get her to talk. She didn´t reply. “Why were you trying to leave?” He asked again. She let the bowl fall into the sink. “Because I´m a coward!” She shouted at him, regretting it immediately. But he didn´t even flinch. “No, you´re not. I know you, (y/n) , after all these months.” He said coming a little closer. (y/n) felt the desperate tears trying to find their way out of her eyes. “You don´t.” She just said and ran outside, not sure where she was going, only that she wanted to be away from people.

She climbed onto one of the watchtowers and just sat there gathering her thoughts. Paul saved her a couple of months ago – was it half a year already? (y/n) was at her worst back then, skinny, weak and dying of an infected cut.

The pain was getting unbearable. It was almost too hard to stand when she found an old grocery store, completely empty of any supplies of course. She had cut her calf pretty badly about three weeks ago. A couple of walkers had surprised her out of nowhere and as she had frantically run from them she slashed her leg on a piece of a rusty metal. She had been trying to find some antibiotics or at least a first aid kit for the past two weeks, when the fever started settling in her. By now, she didn´t even hope to find anything, she just wanted to lie down for a while and if she wasn´t about to wake up? Well, what the hell. The moment she closed the door of the shop, she noticed a movement behind one of the shelves. (y/n) was weak and absolutely exhausted but she kept her guard at all times. She drew her gun immediately. “Who´s there?” She called and the weakness was very much recognizable in her faint voice. “I don´t want any trouble, but I will shoot if you try anything.” She hadn´t met anyone in a the past three months and the anxiety of a possible confrontation made her heart skip a beat every other second and twist her stomach into knots. The intruder didn´t say anything and kept hiding behind the shelf. The nerves made her heart rate go sky high and she started to see blurry doubled images of her surroundings. “Shit.” She whispered when she felt her legs give way. (y/n) felt flat on her back, the gun falling out of her hand and she couldn´t muster even enough strength to reach for it. Suddenly, she heard a shuffle from where the stranger was hiding. The person ran to her. She didn´t know whether to kill her or help her and she absolutely didn´t care. It was a man, one she didn´t recognize – why should she right? Her mind was fuzzy and she couldn´t properly realize what was happening or what was the man talking about. The darkness took her after that.

He didn´t have to help her back then, he didn´t have to stop her from running last night. Yet he did. And why? Because he was a good person, who still tried to believe in people. (y/n) has lost this faith in humanity. She was suspicious around every person she met, even within the colony. She didn´t make friends and kept to herself. The only person she was properly in contact with was Jesus, who tried to make her feel welcome and secure. But she didn´t want to get close to people, because she knew that at least a part of her family was still out there. Her family, which she betrayed by leaving them behind and would betray once more if she accepted herself as a part of the Hilltop. This realization hit her only a couple of day ago, which was why she wanted to leave the colony. She didn´t want to hurt Paul, but at least he would have one less thing to worry about. Every thought of her previous group hurt like a stab into her heart. But she wanted to find them, to finally face the truth – who survived and who was killed. That was probably the main reason why she didn´t follow their tracks - being too scared of the truth. Just that. A stupid fear. And more than anything, she wanted to apologize. For leaving them, for not finding them after, for everything. (y/n) was a little lost in her thoughts, not sure of what to do, when Paul´s voice called for her from below the watchtower. “Hey, (y/n) ! Can I come up? Please?” (y/n) felt bad for shouting at him earlier so she agreed. Paul climbed up the ladder and sat across her. “I want to apologize for pushing you before. I know it´s none of my business, but I hate seeing you so stressed.” He sighed looking at her. “Paul, you´re the last person to apologize for anything. I just can´t think straight lately. I´m ashamed of things I did in the past, scared of others and I feel that I should make them right. I mean if I still can...” She said wiping her eyes, realizing she has been crying. She stopped talking and looked at the wooden floor. Paul sensed an opportunity to make her talk. “Who´s Daryl?” (y/n) ´s eyes widened with surprise and maybe fear. “What?” She gasped. “How did - ?” She was truly lost for words. “You talk in your sleep. The trailer´s small enough for me to hear. You´ve been saying people´s names for about the past three weeks. Glenn, Carol, Rick... You sound sad and scared. There are others, but you´re saying his the most often.” Jesus explained and she looked away from him again.

The names, being said out loud, brought all her memories back, the painful ones and even the happy ones. The most painful memory was of her and Daryl shouting at each other just a few nights before the prison had fallen. Neither of them had been sure what the relationship between them had or hadn´t been as they´d seemed too complicated for each other. They hadn´t managed to sort it out before the attack and it hurt her so much, not knowing whether he was still alive or if he´d died, his last memory of her being their fight. (y/n) was stunned for a second and felt more tears escaping her eyes as her heart ached.  Then she looked at him again, her expression sad and determined at once. “They´re the reasons why I wanted to leave last night. I was a part of a group before. They were like my family. Then a fight broke out between us and another community. A lot of people died on both sides and we had to leave the place we were staying at. We got separated, I got lost and didn´t even try to find my way back to them, not wanting to face the reality of who had been killed. Lately I´ve been feeling as if I betrayed them by not finding them again.” She explained wanting to go and find them right now at this very moment. “So you want to find them again now? Do you have any ideas where to start?” Paul asked. His approach surprised her. “You´re not going to tell me how stupid it is trying to find people I haven´t seen for over year? In this world?” She asked. “No. Hope is a good thing. I could help if you´d want me to. I´m going on a run tomorrow. How about we plan something after I return? But you´d have to promise not to leave until I´m back.” He said hoping she would accept his offer. (y/n) smiled at him and for the first time in a long time, the smile reached her eyes a little. “I promise.” Paul smiled back at her and started to climb down the ladder. “So, who´s Daryl?” He asked again. “He´s the one I want to apologise the most to.” Christie said, getting up herself. She turned to look over the wall and rested her forearms on top of it as Paul disappeared from her view.

The two men finally stopped pointing their guns at him. They seemed dangerous, but not enough to kill him right now. “I´m Rick, this is Daryl. You got a group?” Paul´s heart skipped a beat – could it be them? If so, they can´t live too far from here. But until he would be sure it´s better to play it safe. Paul decided to leave them alone for now, getting back to Hilltop to describe the two men to (y/n) . But they also needed the supplies and he wanted to take the truck with him. If they truly were those (y/n) wanted to find, they would share the supplies. And with these thoughts he set off his plan. “No. Do you?”

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Fears

Fandom: Kingsman

Pairing: Merlin x reader

Characters: Merlin, (y/n), Eggsy, mention of Harry

Summary: (y/n) is an agent but has always been terrified of water. What happens when she has to swim away from her enemies? 

Author´s note: I hate water, okay? I don´t know if I represented the shock after accurately, but I tried... Oh, and sorry, I can´t write accents, so I don´t. But anyway, enjoy

“I can´t do this Eggsy. I just can´t.“ (y/n) said while looking at the deep water under them. It was a necessary short cut to get out of the place alive. The tunnel in front of them was about 6,5 feet wide and about 19 feet long. It curved down and up again, where their escape route was. The stone bank made the water look like a lake in a cave, but it narrowed down to the quite small tunnel. Eggsy just looked at her and furrowed his brows in confusion. “Wha- ? It´s not that far, we´ll be out in a minute.” He started descending into the water, but (y/n) couldn´t move. “She´s scared of water Galahad, you need to help her. Agent Guinevere, you have to get out of there as quickly as possible.” She heard through her earpiece. “Merlin, you know I can´t. The water – I – I cannot -...” She said starting to panic. “You have to (y/n)! Now!” He almost shouted into the mic. “(y/n) come on.” Eggsy said urgently, the water up to his waist already. There were footsteps approaching quickly to them. Eggsy ran back to her almost dragging her into the water. She knew she had to do it, but the fear buried inside her was too much to bear right now. Water was always a difficult element for (y/n). She could swim, but not too well and when it came to diving, she just couldn´t do it. The feeling of the surrounding water, as if trying to suffocate her, was something she has never been really able to cope with. Not being able to breathe, to move properly, actually seeing the imaginary vault door instead of the water surface – all those things combined into one experience was a thing of the worst nightmares to her throughout all her live. And now, once again, she was supposed to disappear into the cold water against her own will. “Deep breaths now, (y/n), okay?” Eggsy said holding her by her elbows and leading her deeper into the water. She couldn´t say anything, but tried to breathe evenly. The fear and panic was extremely visible on her face.  But she knew she had to do it. There was no other way.

Merlin could see how terrified she was on his monitor through Eggsy´s specs. He knew that water scared her more than anything else in the world. The first test of the training program had almost made him believe she would give up her candidacy all those years ago. Of course she hadn´t done well on that one. She had been very lucky another girl had been able to get her to the toilets for air. Back then Merlin had thought she would be gone the next week, not being able to compete again. But she had kept her determination and hadn´t thought back to the horrible night. Eventually she had been so much better than the other candidates that she had joined their agency. After a few months of their relationship (y/n) eventually had admitted that she had woken up crying from nightmares in the middle of the night after the event many, many times

“(y/n), concentrate on Eggsy, listen to him. But you have to get out of there.” Merlin said trying to stay calm. The water was by her neck now. “You can do this. I know you can. You´ve got to go first, so I can help you if something goes wrong, okay?” Eggsy said smiling at her. “Okay.” She whispered, her throat tight. “You need to keep your eyes open, you hear me?” Eggsy said a little bit more nervously now as they both could hear the voices of the approaching enemies. That made her move. (y/n) took a deep breath and started swimming down. After a few meters she felt as if she would explode. She persuaded herself that she cannot panic now or she would drown. Her lungs were hurting and so were her eyes, her ears and nose. She wanted to take a breath so much. But she was only half way through the tunnel. Eggsy saw her slowing down and swam closer to her as much as the narrow space allowed. She couldn´t take it anymore. The panic returned combined with the realization of how narrow the tunnel actually was. She wasn´t claustrophobic, but when it came to water, things changed. She let out the last breath which she tried to hold in. Eggsy was quick enough to notice that she could drown if he didn´t do something. He grabbed her arm and swam for both of them, reaching the place where the tunnel bended up and taking them to the surface as quickly as he was able to, before the valve in the tunnel closed behind them.

If Merlin had any hair he would be ripping them off right at that moment. She couldn´t hear him underwater and he couldn´t do anything to help her. All he could do was just to sit there and wait while his heart was beating faster than ever before. He knew Eggsy would help her, but right at the moment it did not calm him down.

(y/n) felt absolutely numb, but she managed to kick her feet strongly enough to keep moving. If she breathed in she would drown – that was the only thing going through her mind. She didn´t even realize that Eggsy´s hand was probably going to leave a bruise from his tight grip. The water seemed soft around her, almost soothing and yet her chest was burning. And suddenly that frighteningly surrealistic feeling stopped. It just stopped. Instead of cold water, freezing air surrounded her, but she was afraid to take a breath. Eggsy´s coughing was what made her open her eyes properly, realizing what had just happened. She also started coughing and quickly got out of the water, her breaths short and uneven, coughing every time she breathed in. Eggsy quickly followed her. She sat down on the ground shaking violently. It wasn´t cold, it was a nice spring evening, but (y/n) felt as if she would freeze. “(y/n), you´re out of there, now try to calm down.” Merlin said trying to get her out of the trans, speaking slowly. Eggsy wasn´t sure what was happening. (y/n) has always been one of the best agents, rarely scared of anything, always there to help others. This wasn´t like her at all. “Eggsy, she´s in shock. You need to keep her warm and get back to the HQ.” Merlin announced. His heart has not slowed down but the imminent terror he felt was gone. The cab was waiting for them nearby and they would head to the HQ safely.

(y/n) couldn´t hear anything at the moment, her head spinning and hurting. Her breathing calmed down a little, but she was still shaking, sitting on the dirty ground. “(y/n), can you stand up?” Eggsy tried and she looked at him not sure of what he wanted. “Come on love. You can do this.” Merlin´s voice rang in her ear suddenly. “Merlin?” she murmured quietly. “Yeah, your Scotsman is waiting for you back at the HQ, so what do you say we get back there?” Eggsy suggested and helped (y/n) on her feet. “I´m here love. Everything´s alright.” Merlin spoke again. Eggsy led her to the cab, taking her dark blue suit jacket off and wrapping her in a blanket. She didn´t say anything during the whole time. “Merlin, what´s wrong with her?” Eggsy asked when he went to the driver´s seat. “She´ll be okay, it´s the shock. Just keep her warm.” Merlin answered frustrated. “I mean what happened? She´s never like this – never ever.” Eggsy pushed, trying to get answers. “We can talk about it later, Eggsy. Now get her here” Merlin said with a sigh.

Eggys felt confused. (y/n) was always calm and brave, but most importantly she became a great friend of his as they clicked very well with each other. They usually made jokes and laughed on their way to the HQ after a successful mission. But today all of this happened so quickly and now she was sitting in the back of the cab, eyes watery as if she was about to cry, still shaking and absolutely silent. Her specs and her earpiece were laying on the seat next to her. Could a simple fear really do that to a person? Just as Eggsy was about to say something and took a breath to do so, Merlin stopped him. “Don´t Eggsy, she won´t answer you right now. She´ll start talking on her own, give her a minute.” He said and waited impatiently for them to arrive.

Merlin has been through this with her before. Only once, but he learned from that. It was also a mission and (y/n) fell into a river, deep but fortunately not moving very fast. Back then it was Harry who pulled her out of the water, but it was Merlin who immediately came to help her and comfort her after. It was a shock and maybe a panic attack caused by her fear of water. It was the same now as it was before, only this time probably not as bad, because she was able to cooperate with Eggsy.

Eggsy pulled the cab over in front of the mansion and before he could run out to get (y/n), he heard her weak voice. “I´m so terribly sorry Eggsy.” She was on the verge of tears still looking out of the window. Before Eggsy could say anything Merlin basically sprinted out of the door and opened the back of the cab where (y/n) was sitting, curled up in the blanket. “Merlin?” She whispered as if surprised to see him. “I´m right here, my love.” Merlin said and picked her up as if she was a feather. She cuddled to him instantly, quiet sobs already coming from her. “She´ll be alright?” Eggsy asked and looked from (y/n) to Merlin. “Absolutely. Don´t worry Eggsy. I think we can leave the debriefing for tomorrow.” Merlin said, his face unreadable as ever when it suddenly changed and Eggsy could see the relief and worry mixed into one. “Thank you for bringing her back.” Merlin added. Eggsy felt relived too, even though he was still a bit confused. Merlin knew what was happening and (y/n) evidently wanted or even needed his company right now. They would talk about this later and for this moment, Eggsy was glad that his friend and colleague was in good hands. And with that he headed home.

(y/n) was sobbing into Merlin´s chest, her eyes closed tight and the grip of her hand on his sweater much weaker than usual. Merlin sat them near the fireplace and he had her in his lap, stroking her hair slowly, trying to calm her with his voice, repeating “it´s okay” and “You´re safe now” and “I´m here” over and over again. It took about twenty minutes before (y/n) stopped shaking and the tears ceased to roll out. There was silence for a while, only the cracking fire making any sounds. “I almost got us both killed.” She whispered. “That´s not true. Your instincts kicked in, you went underwater on your own accord. That´s a great progress.” Merlin said quietly, his deep voice calming her with every word. “But still... They were so close... And then I freaked out...” She sighed and buried her head even deeper into him. “But you both made it unharmed. Eggsy wouldn´t let you drown or leave you there even if you refused to dive. But you didn´t and you made it.” Merlin said his lips touching her hair. “I need to apologize to him. I was acting so stupid and I only scared you both and you tried to help me and I just ignored it and -“ Merlin stopped her before she could continue and lifted her head with his finger under her chin. He looked at her for a while, studying her face and suddenly his soft lips were on hers in a short sweet kiss. “Yeah, you scared me shitless.” He said, but he was calm, enjoying that she was coming from the panic attack so quickly. “I´m so sorry darling.” She said looking at him so sadly as she caressed his cheek slightly. “I should´ve overcome this stupid fear a long time ago.” (y/n) sighed. “We can work on that.” Merlin nodded, still looking at her. “But everyone is scared of something.” He added and looked into the fire. “You´re not.” (y/n) said and her eyes stayed fixed on his face. “I am.” He argued and looked down at her with a playfully serious expression. She looked at him with a questioning face. “Aye, I´m terrified of bears and I run away from bugs.” He said with a little smirk on his face. “You´re lying.” (y/n) said, doubting his statement, smile forming on her lips. “I´m not.” Merlin said, pretending to be offended by her accusation.(y/n) laughed at the face he made. It was a quiet and sweet chuckle and Merlin was never happier to hear it then at that very moment. It was a sign that she was no longer dwelling on the event. She will remember it again tomorrow, when she´ll talk to Eggsy about it, but that will only help her get over it better.(y/n) laid her head down on his chest again, whispering a quiet “thank you” to him and fell asleep quickly after. Merlin sat with her for a little longer caressing her hair. After a while he picked her up again. (y/n) didn´t even flinch, sleeping very deeply. He smiled at her and took her to bed, hoping she would have pleasant dreams tonight. She did.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Cuts And Bruises

Fandom: Angel (Buffy TVS)

Pairing: Wesley x reader

Characters: Wesley, (y/n), Angel + Angelus, Cordelia, a little bit of Faith

Summary: Set during the events of a few episodes in season 1 of Angel. Angelus spills a little secret of yours. Everyone takes a beating from Faith and Wesley is waiting for you to wake up at hospital.

Author´s note: I know I´m probably like 15 years late to add to this fandom, but I started rewatching the series and I rediscovered my love for Wesley :D Enjoy the fluff please.

“And you… What to do with you? Always so scared.” Angelus said standing right in front of me. I was shaking, thinking we would all die right now. “Always thinking you´re not good enough. Not good enough to work for Angel, not good enough to be friends with Cordelia and oohh, not good enough to even cross Wesley´s mind.” Now I was scared and angry. “And you know what? You´re right.” He mockingly said and approached. “Yeah. Maybe. But you know what? I´m good enough for me!” I shouted at him as Wesley tackled him down the elevator shaft.  We strapped him to his bed with chains. I didn´t even look at any of them and left quickly. I felt Cordelia´s eyes on my back but I didn´t stop to look at her. The next day I came to the office and Cordelia came to me hugging me. “I´m sorry about yesterday.” I said. “You´re sorry? I am sorry.” She smiled. “I know I´m not easy to be around sometimes. But I always considered you my friend. You hear me?” She asked. I just nodded down at her and smiled. “Angelus´s  an ass.” I said. “Yeah. But the good version wants to talk to you.” She said. “Alright. Thanks.” I said and headed down to see Angel. “But really? Wesley?” She added when I turned my back to her. I just shrugged and looked away quickly going down the steps.

“Angel?”I asked stepping into his apartment. There was some shuffling in the kitchen. “(y/n)?” He poked out and came closer. “Hi.” I smiled weakly. “Hey. I- um... You weren´t here last night, after... You know. And  I just... Wanted to apologize.” He said looking at me. “It´s okay. There´s no need to, really.” I knew it wasn´t really him, I was just a bit upset that the others heard it all too. “It made me realize I actually like myself.” I laughed feebly. “I´m still sorry.” He said sitting on a chair behind him. “Did you speak with the others?” He asked. “With Cordy, yeah. Not with Wesley, though.” I sighed. “It is gonna be awkward. Jeez. I don´t know what to say in this kind of a situation. Any help?” I looked at him a bit desperate. “I´m not the best guy for that, I´m afraid.” He looked down.

But before I could say anything to Wes, Faith was in the town and there was no mood for talking about such things. And before I even knew how, I was getting punched in my face and having my arm broken by the crazy slayer. I passed out just a few meters away from Cordelia.

“Where´s Wesley?” I asked when I woke up. “She took him. I called Angel, he´s after them.” Said Cordelia. “Are you okay?” I asked. “Yeah... I Guess. You look like hell, though.” She said. I screamed as I was trying to get up realizing my arm was broken. “Damn it.” Said Cordelia as I passed out again. When I woke up again I was in a hospital.

I couldn´t open my eyes at first because everything was too bright. I felt that my left arm was unbelievably heavy and I realized my forearm was in a cast. I made a quiet grunt when I moved slightly, because my head hurt like hell. When I heard some shuffling beside the bed I was laying in, I finally opened my eyes and looked in the direction. “Wes?” I whispered in surprise. He was there, with cuts and bruises covering most of his visible skin. “(y/n)!” He yelped in surprise as if he was lost in his thoughts until now. “You´re awake, I´ll call the nurse –“ Before he could run off anywhere I tried to catch him with my good hand. I only managed to get a very light grip on the sleeve of his shirt. “Stay.” I whispered not wanting him to leave now and he sat back down on the chair beside my bed. “Angel and Cordy? Are they okay?” I asked suddenly, not sure of what happened to them. “They are back at Angel´s place. They´re fine.” He said but didn´t smile. I just nodded with a relieved sigh and then I looked at him properly. He didn´t have his glasses on and I recognised the dark circles around his eyes which weren´t bruises. He was tired. “Are you okay?” I asked him. “Well, since you´re the one laying in a hospital bed, I think -” I cut him off again. “Wes... Are you okay?” He knew what I meant. Faith used to be his responsibility and he felt, that everything that had happened was on him. “I am...” He said, but his eyes shifted. “I will be.” He sighed. I felt so sorry for him. He didn´t deserve to feel like this. His eyes still avoided mine. I suddenly realized what had happened those many nights ago, how Angelus let out my little secret and how there hadn´t been time to address it. Up until now. “Wesley, I...” I started and shifted in my spot, the broken arm starting to hurt more as I moved. Wesley quickly stood up and tried to help me to sit up as he saw me struggling. “I thought I was going to lose you.” He said suddenly and there were tears in his eyes. “And the thought that it would be my fault...” He trailed off and the tears found their way out of his eyes. “I´m alright. We´re all alright. None of this was your fault. You cannot blame yourself like this.” He looked away from me completely. “She´s there with them.” He said out of nowhere. “You mean Faith?” I asked surprised. “Yes. She broke down, wanted Angel to kill her. He took her in.” He rubbed his eyes but winced when he touched one of his wounds. “And you couldn´t go there. I understand.” I waited for him to look back at me. “So you stayed here.”  That seemed to startle him. “No! I mean yes, but I... I...” He tried to recollect himself and I patiently waited. Faith in general was a sensitive topic, but after this... Well I couldn´t imagine what he must´ve gone through. “After Angel had brought her back to his place, he told me you were in the hospital, that Cordelia got you here. And I was so angry – at Angel, at least in that moment. I had to get out of there and I got so scared that you...” His words were getting quicker again. “I just never want to see her again. I don´t want to see her hurting the people I... people around me.” He said in a tone I didn´t really recognize, he was angry and right in this moment, he seemed dangerous. Before I could say anything a nurse walked in to check on me. “Morning.” She said and eyed Wesley who was standing with his back to her, looking out of the window. “I´ll be back in a few, okay (y/n)?” He asked quietly and left the room before I could say anything. “Quite a fella. What happened to him?” the nurse asked, looking at the closed door and back to me. I just continued staring at the door.  “Something  bad. He was just trying to protect his friends.”

He was even more angry when he stormed out of the office. Still at Angel and at Faith but even at himself. If he was just better at... at everything, things would be easier. Wesley couldn´t stay in the office, not with Faith being treated by Angel as if nothing had happened. He decided to return to the hospital. He was more calm when he knew that she´s alive and well – especially when he knew it from sitting right next to her. But he was also a little nervous now, because of the way he behaved to her before. He was tired, but he didn´t think of going back to his place to get some sleep, not for a second.

There was knock on the door maybe two hours later. After Wesley left, a doctor came in and told me what injuries I had and tried to ask me what had happened. I had nasty bruising on the left side of my face, my left arm was broken just under the elbow and also my left little finger seemed to have broken at some point during the fight. I didn´t tell them what had happened, I only claimed that I couldn´t remember much. “Come in.” I said and Wesley´s head popped inside the room. He looked different. He probably took some time to calm down and to think. “Hello, stranger.” I smiled at him as I swung my feet from the bed to sit normally for a while. I felt much more awake, the painkillers and sleeping pills wearing off.  “Hey” He said as he tried to return the smile. I patted the spot next to me on the bed and he sat down with two mugs in his hands. “I brought you some proper tea.” He looked at me for a second and handed me the mug. “Milk and sugar, right?” He asked, just to be sure. “Yes, thank you so much. That´s exactly what I need.” I enjoyed the warmth of the liquid in my hands and the smell of earl grey. It was one of those smells that were just... Wesley, at least for me. “I wanted to apologize for earlier.” He said looking into his cup. “For being on edge like that. I wanted to be here for you and I only ended up being a big softie.” I looked at him and put a hand on his shoulder. “There is nothing to apologize for. I realize it must´ve been much worse for you. I´m very grateful that you decided to stay here with me.” I smiled at him and he finally returned the smile. A true smile. “How is your arm?” He asked. “Well, still broken. The bruises on my face are probably worse...” I said and realized that I haven´t even seen myself in a mirror. My face was probably all purple and my hair sticking into every direction. I felt the heat rising up my cheeks and turned away slightly. “I look horrible, don´t I?” I hid behind the cup, which I raised to my face. Wesley pushed my hands down, set both of the mugs down on a table and forced me to look at him. “You look beautiful. And I will never allow something like this happening to you again.” My face was probably completely red and I felt the famous butterflies in my stomach flying around. Wesley was never this direct; he was a stuttering and awkward mess when it came to women. But not now. The man sitting next to me was a confident one, sure of his words. It was exciting to see him like this. Suddenly, he took my right hand into his a looked down at our hands entwining. He was warm, probably from holding the cup of tea, and I breathed out the breath I was apparently holding. It felt nice, reassuring. “And just so you know, Angelus lied that evening. You... you´re absolutely good enough for me.” He looked up to meet your eyes again. “Actually, you´re the best.” I completely lost control over myself after his words and before any of us could say anything else I simply leaned in and kissed him on the lips. It took us both by surprise and I quickly leaned back only to meet his eyes as wide as mine and a small smile forming on his lips. Now it was his time to close the gap between us. He snuggled closer to me and put his arms around me carefully. My good hand wandered to his neck and hair and we kissed like there was no tomorrow. After the first wave of passion, we both realized how much our faces actually hurt from the injuries and we had to part with a small laughs and a quiet “sorry” coming from both of us.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Distraction

Fandom: Supernatural

Pairing: slightly Sam x reader

Characters: Kevin, (y/n), Sam and Dean

Summary: (y/n) is trying to distract her friend from work, even if it means being a little childlish

„Hey, Kev, do you want anything from the kitchen?“ (y/n) shouted at the prophet sitting at a table in the main room. “No, I´m alright.” Was the only answer she got, but even that was a success. (y/n) took her glass of water and returned to Kevin. She sat across the table and looked in his direction. He had dark circles under his eyes, which didn´t seem to want to disappear, but he looked much better than a few weeks ago. When he noticed her staring, Kevin raised his eyebrow questioningly. She just smiled at him. “How are you feeling lately? You look much better.” He was like a brother to (y/n) and she was worried about him. Kevin realized that and at least tried to look content. “I am better. It´s just these stupid things are making me tired.” He sighed. “You should take a break, my friend. At least until Sam and Dean are back.” (y/n) tried to cheer him up. “Or we can chat, at least.” She smiled again. (y/n) has been trying to get to him for so long, but ever since they were in the bunker it wasn´t easy. Well, it has never been easy, but at least they talked more. Kevin knew that just as well as she did, but he was too stressed and tired to care if he talked the proper amount of time with everyone each day. He put down the translation he´s been working on and pierced her with a firm look. “Okay, let´s chat. How are things with Sam?” Well, that was a mean one, (y/n) thought as she looked at him with a scowling look. “This topic is taboo and you know it.” Kevin only chuckled. “You wanted to talk! And to be honest, I´m very interested in what´s gonna happen between you two.” He just seemed so pleased with how he startled his friend.  “You´re sly as a fox sometimes, you know that?” She said, playfully angry and crossed her arms on her chest. “Oh come on, the only person who doesn´t know about your undying love for the giant, is himself. I don´t think it will take you two much longer to realize things.” Kevin seemed absolutely pleased about how he was handling the situation. “I don´t deserve that from you, you midget!” (y/n) laughed at his statement as an attempt to hide the tiny flush of her cheeks. “It´s true though! Everything will come up to the surface, you´ll jump into each other´s arms and live happily ever after with ten children screaming around you!” He announced dramatically. (y/n) laughed loudly and realized that Kevin has finally relaxed. “Just wait until I get something on you!” She said and crumpled one of the papers around into a ball, which she threw at him. It hit his shoulder and after a few seconds a true battle began. They both laughed and were absolutely content and happy about the simplicity and absurdity of the situation.

It was in that moment when two tall men entered to room, both looking as if they weren´t sure they came into the right house. Sam started to laugh quietly and when (y/n) looked up from behind the table, she didn´t know what expression would be appropriate right at the moment. “What exactly is going on here?” asked Dean, clearly confused. “Ehm... A legendary battle for the power over this world?” She finally laughed and so did Kevin. “And I thought they were adults...” Sighed Dean, but the easy atmosphere got even to him, so it didn´t sound as reproachful. Sam just looked in their direction, amused.  “I´ll help you clean up, ok?” He asked suddenly. “That would be nice. Thanks Sam.” (y/n) said and heard Kevin laugh quietly as he went to the other side of the battle field, to start from there. She didn´t pay any more attention to him, as Sam was kind of close to her now. She couldn´t control her eyes properly and they wandered to him from time to time. He caught her looking, suddenly, but only smiled. “What was this about?” he asked, the smiled still on his handsome face. “I was trying to distract Kevin from the translations. He´s going crazy from it all. I can´t see him so worried all the time. This just sort of happened. But I proudly admit that it´s my fault.” She returned the smile. “You´re great friend. Kevin´s lucky to have you. We all are.” Sam said as he continued throwing the paper balls into a plastic bag he´s found. “Thanks Sam.” (y/n) smiled at him again.

Kevin was standing a little afar, after he´s finished his place, and was watching the still working couple. After a few moments he was joined by Dean, who leaned against the wall. “How long is it going to take?” He asked. “You mean cleaning the floor or for them to get together? Because I think that neither is going to take long.” Kevin chuckled. “That´s what I thought.” He sighed. “I´ve got this feeling that (y/n) was trying to distract you from your work, and I´m not going to ruin her plans. So, enjoy your evening.” Dean said and patted him on the back before walking away.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Waiting

Fandom: Prometheus

Pairing: David 8 x reader

Characters: David 8, (y/n), mention of Vickers and captain Janek

Summary: David is waiting for you to wake up as you sleep in a cryopod. During his waiting he´s remembering some of the time he´s spent with you.

They have talked quite a lot before. She was always trying to be polite to him but he never felt the detachment in her voice that he always heard when someone was talking to him. It fascinated him. He felt satisfied even when she simply wished him a good morning. She wasn´t prettier or more clever than the other crewmembers, but she acted differently than other humans towards him and seemed to stay detached from the others aboard. Those were the first things he noticed about her. But there was much more to come. He was trying to be patient, to wait for her to wake up. But that could be months away. H couldn´t just wake her up because he wanted to. He stepped closer to the pod where she was sleeping peacefully as he remembered the moments before she was put there to sleep through the journey.

“Oh, Hello, David. I´ve just made tea. Do you want some?” She asked him when she noticed him entering the galley. It was the night before they would leave the Earth. He always declined, when she offered him something, but today he decided he would comply. “Good evening, doct – (y/n).” He stopped himself from addressing her by her title; she had corrected him many times, asking him to call her by her first name. He noticed her smile to herself as she poured some tea for herself. “A cup of tea would be very pleasing tonight, thank you.” He said coming closer. She was a linguist and he was responsible for decomposing the ancient languages necessary. It was expected that they would spend time around each other. “Here you go.” She said handing him the cup. She looked him in the eyes, then looked down and turned around to take her own cup. “Thank you. Are you feeling alright?” He asked. “What do you mean?” She said raising her eyebrows. “It is our last night on the planet. It is understandable that you would be nervous.” He explained. “Well, you said it. That´s why I´m having tea just a few hours before the take off instead of preparing.”  She chuckled and sipped the tea. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?” He asked her taking only a step closer. “Just tell me everything is going to work according to plan and everything is going to be alright.” She said quietly clearly not very sure if she should be even admitting she was worried this much. He came closer to her and hugged her tightly.

They have hugged before. The first time she hugged him because she was so very happy to finally understand a part of Sumerian morphology. He didn´t know how to react back then and she quickly realized that, apologizing. But since then he understood that she simply learned to enjoy his company to an extent where she felt comfortable to express her feelings in this way. He definitely didn´t mind. He has never been this close to someone; it was a nice sensation. The second time he hugged her. She was feeling down that day because Miss Vickers scolded her for making a few typos in her report. The woman wasn´t very pleased with her joining the crew, as she thought that an android should be enough for translations. David then came into her quarters to tell her not to be sad about it anymore and hugged her, still a little stiffly, but it counted as a real hug. That was the first time she realized she liked her new working companion more that she should. She leaned into him and hugged him back, saying nothing, but the content sigh that left her body confirming him that he has done the right thing to calm down his... Friend? David was programmed to mimic emotions, to understand them. But befriending someone and care for them should be beyond his capabilities. Yet here he was holding her in his arms comfortably. Ever since the first time she had hugged him, he realized people usually avoided any physical contact with him. No hugs, no pats on the back, no caressing hand on his arms. And yet she touched him so often. Very subtly and commonly among humans who are relatively close to one another. He wanted more of that. To be touched gently by her, which was definitely one of the reasons he came to her room the second time they hugged.

But tonight it was different. She was scared and nervous, completely different emotions from sadness or irritation, he understood. That was why she clung onto him and didn´t want to let go. “Everything will be fine. You will be fine.” He said, his lips almost touching her hair. “I´m going to miss you.” She said, her head still laying comfortably on his chest, hearing his artificial heartbeat. “It will feel as a simple long night-sleep. You won´t even know how much time will have passed.” He said. “And you will be awake all on your own?” She asked looking at him, taking the smallest step back but not letting go, tea long forgotten. “Yes. I believe it would be more appropriate for me to say that I am going to miss being in your company.” He smirked down at her. She felt surprised. She always knew there was more to him, more complexity to his ability to feel and think for himself, than he let others see. But deciding to actually reveal that to her in such an intimate way has taken her aback. He himself knew it was risky. But he presumed that he knew her well enough not to just call him a faulty machine as others would. He even ran a few diagnostics and found nothing wrong. She felt blood rushing into her cheeks, suddenly very much aware of how close they were. She couldn´t see him as a synthetic, never could. And right at this moment she wished nothing more than to experience him acting even more human than until now. David have seen enough movies and have read enough books to recognize the look in her eyes, only now it seemed so much more real. And he decided to give her what she wanted, what he wanted also. A wave of realization flooded him as he really recognized his state as a one of true want. He closed the gap between them and connected his lips with hers. It was an experiment of some sort for him, not so sure of the actual practice of such an action. She sighed pleasured by the act by which he recognized he was doing well even with the lack of practise. She stroked his hair a little, not wanting to ruffle it too much as the kiss got more passionate. It was still slow and very sensual for both of them, yet each of them experienced something slightly different. “Has anyone seen the language chick?! David?!” A male voice called from the corridor not too far from the galley; the captain was looking for them. They broke apart quickly looking at each other smiling. Her cheeks were slightly red as she straightened her uniform looked at him with a shy smile and stepped out into the corridor. It was time to go to sleep. She sighed and took a deep breath. A hand at the small of her back surprised her, when David came so close to her and smiled again. “Shall we?” He asked, leading her to the hypersleep vault.

The hypersleep vault was full of the sleeping pods, most of them already occupied. “Captain. Were you looking for me?” She asked her nervousness not as visible to him. “Yeah, yeah. It´s time to go to sleep, doc. You better crawl inside the pod over there.” The captain said pointing to his right and then walking off. David was standing nearby the door and started walking towards her when she started undressing herself from the uniform. She has always found the idea of sleeping in two pieces of cloth, which she didn´t even think would pass for underwear, very enjoyable. Too many people to see too many things after they will have woken up. She put the uniform away and crawled inside the pod, her heart already beating fast. David came closer to her and bended a little above her. “Good night, (y/n).” He said with an innocent smile. Even the sight of him made her more calm and when he stroked her cheek ever so slightly, so that no one could see, she was starting to look forward to waking up even more. “Good night, David. See you soon.” She almost whispered and closed her eyes as the pod started closing.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Hurt

Fandom: The Walking Dead

Pairing: none

Characters: Aaron, Negan, (y/n)

Summary: Just the Saviors being the bullies they are.

“Leave me alone! Don´t you dare to touch me!” (y/n) shouted at one of the Saviors, who was following her around and tried to grab from her behind just a second ago. She didn´t dare to pull out her knife at him but she could shout. He seemed taken aback. “I have to watch you taking all our stuff but don´t you dare to lay a hand on me or any other woman here!” (y/n) has never felt so angry. Not even when the prison fell. Never. She saw Aaron approaching the scene but he wasn´t stepping in just yet because the Saviors´ boss was coming. The guy at whom (y/n) was shouting had his back to Negan, didn´t see him coming and was about to grab her by her neck. 

“What is going on here?” Negan asked calmly. If it was still possible, (y/n) became even more angry at the sight of him. But the feeling of fear was even worse. She tried to keep calm but she couldn´t make herself look him in the eyes. “I asked - what is going on here, Jason?” Negan asked again, in a more menacing way now. The guy, Jason, suddenly got a bit nervous and let (y/n) go. “Nothing.” He answered simply and started leaving, when Negan´s bat gently stopped him. “You weren´t trying to do something that we absolutely don´t do, right?” Negan asked him with the bat still holding him in place. “No, sir.” The guy answered and looked at him. “Okay.” Negan said letting him go. “Finish loading the shit and lets get out of here.” He ordered him, suddenly playfull, swinging the bat by his side. 

Then, he came closer to (y/n). “Oh, I thought it was you, doll.” He said to her, his disgusting smile on his face. “They can´t touch you. Don´t worry. We don´t do this shit.” He said leaning closer. “How noble of you.” She said quietly, still looking rather at the ground than him. “You´re a feisty little one. I like that. I was actually thinking about taking you with us, but hey, Daryl over there won that price, so maybe next time.” She finally looked him in the eyes, all the anger and disgust more than visible. “That´s my girl! Last week, I said you´re the weakest link, but... Yeah, I was fucking wrong. You´re braver than the people around here realize.” He smiled at her, amused by his own words. His expression suddenly changed. “But... I don´t like that look. And neither does Lucille. So... Unless you want to go and cut me a piece of Daryl - your very, very good friend, I heard - then, well, change the fucking attitude.” He commanded looking menacingly down at her. And of course it worked. (y/n)´s face changed into a a desperate and scared one. She knew, he would make her do something terrible. It was all still too fresh to put up a fight. “That´s the spirit, darling!” Negan smiled again. “You don´t talk much, but hell, you don´t need to! You´d fit good with us.” He smirked and turned to leave.

She didn´t dare to cry. Not right now. The anger burning inside her once again much more furiously than fear or grief. After a few steps, Negan turned around again. “What´s you name again?” He asked loudly. Her face hardened and she tried not to look the way she felt. “(y/n).” She answered and looked him in the eyes again. “Mhm. Okay, (y/n). See you soon. And tell you friend over there that it´s damn impolite to stare when two people are having a conversation.” Negan said and pointed his bat at Aaron in the background. Then he turned again and finally left this time. 

(y/n) was frozen and didn´t know if she should scream or cry, or do both and go crazy. He killed their friends, part of their family, tortured them all and all with that disgusting smile. And now he comes here, takes all their guns, their medicine and beds and suddenly it felt as too much. She didn´t like killing, not at all, but she definitely wouldn´t mind cutting this asshole into tiny pieces all while he´d still be alive and breathing. She scared herself with how much she wanted that. Aaron´s hand on her shoulder was what made her stir from her thoughts. “Thinking about murdering him?” He asked as if he´d read her mind. “Mhm.” She nodded. “You okay?” Aaron asked looking at her. “No.” (y/n) answered simply looking at the back of the murderer leaving their home. It hurt so much, but she didn´t have to say anything. Aaron was there too; he felt it too. So they stood there until the Saviors left, Aaron´s hand holding (y/n)´s shoulder tightly.

[imagines-from-inside-my-head]

Life Saver

Fandom: Supernatural

Pairing: might be seen as Balthazar x reader

Summary: The reader saves Balthazar from being killed by Castiel.

“Castiel, don´t!” (y/n) shouted at the angel holding his blade against Balthazar´s back. “So... That makes two traitors.” He said menacingly, facing her now. “We´re no traitors! We are trying to help, don´t you understand?” She said, her voice shaking. Balthazar was speechless and stunned. He was sure he´d die here tonigt, he knew it. But now there was this scrawny girl shouting at a soon-to-be God. 

Castiel was suddenly right in front of her and she didn´t have time to run. He grabbed her by her shoulder. “By trying to stop me from doing what is right? I don´t think so” Just as he said that, he stabbed her in the stomach. “Castiel...” She whispered, her eyes wide. “No!” Shouted Balthazar, appeared behind her and before Castiel could do anything, he zapped them away. The wound didn´t kill her straight away, she wasn´t and angel, after all, to her, it was simply a blade. But death was coming to her more than quickly, her pale face and closed eyes approving of the theory. 

Balthazar wasn´t even sure where they landed but he quickly laid her on the ground. Her eyes fluttered open a little and searched for him. “Balthazar?” She asked weakly. “I´m here, I´m right here darling. I´m gonna help you, just hold on.” He said quickly. She barely realized what had happened, but she saw his face and knew that he´s safe and that´s what mattered. “I saved you.” She smiled weakly at him. “You did, now I´m gonna return the favor.” As he said that, she was blinded byy the bright light of his grace. She fainted and Balthazar felt really weak, but he knew that they should get out of there. He picked her up again and got them to Singer´s house. 

He laid her on the bed upstairs and sat down on a chair beside the window. I owe her my life. Balthazar thought, looking at her. He was quite aware that if she hadn´t showed up, if she hadn´t refuse to listen to him, he´d be dead. He never thought, he´d be so grateful that a random human existed. He watched her the whole time until the Winchesters returned. He tried to seem calm as always but he was still too tired and shocked to do that. He went downstairs. “What the hell happened?” Shouted Dean at the angel. “You were supposed to take care of it! Where is (y/n)?” Dean was angry, which meant that Castiel succeeded. “You might want to keep it down, she´s sleeping upstairs.” He said simply. “I would´ve returned to help you, but let´s say my batteries are drained.” Balthazar said, his expresion unreadable. “What happened?” Asked Sam a little more calmly. “Castiel happened. She got the blade in the stomach instead of my back.” Balthazar explained. The boys looked at each other horrified. Before either of them could start shouting again, Balthazar said: “She´s alright. We got away.”

“Sam? Dean?” (y/n) asked as if still dreaming.”Christie, are you okay?” Sam asked and ran upstairs to her. “I am.” She smiled, but her smile it quickly faded. “Castiel?” She asked simply. “Off on a godly mission.” Dean sighed. “I´m sorry.” She said looking at him. “You alright? Heard what happened.” He asked. “Yeah. I am.” She said. “I just hoped I could do more.” She sighed and looked away. “You did enough. You saved Balthazar.” Sam said squeezing her shoulder. She smiled weakly at him. Then her eyes turned to the angel. “Balthazar?” She softly said his name. He looked up at her. “Can we talk?” She asked. “Of course.” He answered and followed her to the room.