idfk-damnit-its-a-haikyuu-blog

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I desperately want to turn this blog into an imagines/scenario blog but work leaves me exhausted every damn day so honestly rn it's just shitposts and head canons

Lots of writing ideas but no motivation or energy 😩

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Sometimes I forget "baby boy baby" Tendou Satori is in fact 6'1 and could probably pick my 5'3 ass up from under the arms and carry me around like a cat

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Tiktok introduced me to the Hard of Hearing Bokuto headcanon and I will not be accepting otherwise at this moment, thank you.

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You ever read ship fics because you exclusively want to see one character get absolutely railed so you just settle on a ship with a second character you don't care about because fuck it?

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I would let tendo satori fuck me in his 2007 honda sedan after having to clean the jimmy johns bags and empty baja blast cups off the passenger side just so I can sit on the original stuffy polyester seat covers so he can drive to the sketchiest, ugliest park and park in the same spot he does when he goes to sell cheap weed to freshmen that don't know the difference to pay rent for his two bedroom apartment that he shares with a guy he found on craigslist anf is so cheap the shower water never gets above lukewarm and it smells like cigarettes despite the fact neither of them smoke and haved lived there for two years just so be can pull me into his lap and hold my hips still while he uses me like an oversized fleshlight for 9 minutes before he drives me home and insists on opening the car door for me because he's a gentleman like that

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Bokuto is a himbo with male wife energy

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Apparently it's tsukishimas birthday today so:

Tsukki Headcanons:

1. Definitely a cat person.

2. I've been told he likes dinosaurs, personally I headcanon Stegosaurus as his favorite.

3. Trans man, 100%. As a trans masc he gives me trans masc vibes. No I won't change my mind.

4. Doesn't actually celebrate his birthday but does use it as an excuse to get out of things i.e sorry can't work today, it's my birthday ya know.

5. He just really looks like he likes All Time Low.

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Cars I think Haikyuu characters would drive because God gave me the right to post and im going to make it everyone's problem

Part 3 (final part): Non Karasuno edition

Tendou:

Nissan 370z for no reason other than I like these and tendou is my favorite character

Ushiwaka:

Toyota Corolla, for no reason other than I think it will be funny.

Oikawa:

I don't have a specific car in mind, I just know he'd buy a sports car, try to show off then wreck it and have to catch a ride with Iwa for a couple weeks until he gets a new one. He doesnt learn from the first time and wrecks the second one too, he starts to take the bus after that.

Kuroo:

Jeep Gladiator, because sometimes even he makes bad decisions.

Kenma:

Kia Soul, specifically this ugly ass yellow one. He doesnt care at least its fuel efficient, I think. Why tf else would you drive this ugly bitch if it wasn't fuel efficient?

Bokuto:

He doesnt care as long as it runs, probably has some piece of shit Ford.

Hoshiumi Korai:

He also drives a miata, but it's a sleeper. Only thing outwardly flashy is the spinner rims and tinted windows, it's under the hood that shows the true power. Looks non threatening but can out run any mother fucker on the drag strip.

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Vehicles I think the Haikyuu characters would own

Karasuno Characters Part 2:

Tsukishima:

Nissan Titan, no doubt. One of the bigger things on the road and it shows, he doesn't have road rage he has road derision, he will bully you off the road.

Yamaguchi:

Toyota Tundra, got a truck because tsukki has one and he thought it was cool, now he has a complex. The Tadashi you know at volleyball practice is a whole different person than the one you see on the road. Road ragiest of road rage.

Tanaka:

Ford F350 Dually, need I say more? Has a pride flag in the back so he can fight homophobes.

Nishinoya:

Miata, not to big on body mods but def added eyelashes to the pop up headlights. Has one in this specific color.

Kiyoko:

Purple Nissan Altima, I don't have an explanation it just has her vibes ya know.

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Cars I think Haikyuu characters would own because no one asked but idgaf

Semi-important info: this is post College

Karasuno Boys Part 1:

Hinata:

At first he'd own a beater but then he saw Kageyama get a new car, and decided to upgrade to a Chevy Cruze with Turbo because Kageyama has a Chevy Cruz with Turbo

The Turbo went out on it

Kageyama:

He owns a Chevy Cruze with Turbo

The turbo went out days before Hinatas did, Hinata insists he won because his lasted longer

Daichi:

A 1991 Toyota Corolla that's had the check engine light on for two years due to a catalytic converter issue

Asahi:

He drives a hippie van, no I do not take constructive criticism

Sugawara:

2000 Buick Lesabre 100%

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Tendou was definitely the dealer who sold oregano to freshman who didn't know any better

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Some tendou headcanons, as I write a fic for him:

Weed mention /cw

1. Mans a fuckin insomniac, he routinely stays up till 3 am or will go days without sleeping.

2. He's a choclatier so we all know the man has a sweet tooth, I think he likes dark chocolate more than milk chocolate.

3. He'd sneak out of school on his lunch breaks and hotbox his car, probably spent most of his highschool years high as a kite.

4. King of edibles, his senior prank was bringing weed brownies to high school on his last day and giving them to his teachers as "thank yous".

5. His childhood nickname is Ten-Ten, he hates it.

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Let's start this blog off right, with characters I, as a trans person, think are trans (ftm) for no particular reason other than I want to

1. Daichi

2. Bokuto

3. Tendou

4. Kuroo

5. Tsukishima

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Tumblr keeps deleting my Bio so:

Matthew, 25, He/Him, 18+ only please

I just wanted somewhere to shit post away from my main.

All things dumb, all things haikyuu and maybe a headcanon, fic or imagine too.

Total number of times I've had to rewrite this before making a pinned post because tumblr kept deleting it: 6

Edit:

I write almost exclusively x male reader fics, will do Gender neutral if asked, will not write x female reader (sorry)

Nsfw content will be tagged with "Smut"

More times than not I will default to trans male reader/character but sometimes I'll branch out, if specified in requests I'll also write them as cis.

I'm okay writing most NSFW content, including SOME (not all) dead dove. If someone asks for a fic outside my comfort zone I'll reply with so.

Please keep in mind requests make take a bit, I have a full time job and a life outside of work. Thanks for understanding.