just a sideblog for vent art, everything is okay to reblog or whatever / abt
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sad dog momences
#emetophobia in da tags#i feel so sick mentally i want to vomit so bad i hate being girl i hate being around cishet guys i want vom i wanna vom idont even know if#overreacting either lawl lawl lwal fuck fuckme i feel so uncomofrtable idk hwat happened yesterday i was so fucking tired i should have lef#people pleaser!!! ur always a people pleaser!!!!! just leave!!!! stop givng up ursef stop stop stop#to anyone reading this i promise i wasnt in a dnagerous situation but i was increible uncomfotable and felt used
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TEAR ME APART!! LET ME OUT!!
#self harm ?#sort of#vent#vent art#i hope this doesnt come off as too gorey?#imma tag just in case#gore ?#body horror ?#I FEEL SO TRAPPED HERE AND MY BODU HURTS SO MUCH#I WANT TO GET RID OF MY BODY MY ARMS MY LIMBS#I WANT TO GET BETTER BUT MY CURRENT CIRCUMSTANCE DOESNT ALLOW IT#HELP ME HLELP ME I HATE IT#I HATE CHRONIC PAIN I WANT TO BE ABLE TO DO THINGS AGAIN#CANT EVEN FUCJING DRAW WITHOUT MY ARM HURTING AND ITS ACTUALLYKILLING ME#I WANT TO DIE BUT I CANT ALLOW THAT#IT SUCKS IJUST WANT IT TO END#sorry its all pent up shit from like 6+ months i just want to reset my body like a robot and do things i love again#i feel hopeless and i dont feel like everything is out of my control and it sucks
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#vent art#vent#spinel#steven universe#we are suppose to be friends why do u keep treating me like this#who am i really?
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i couldnt remember she broke it, she had to tell me.
#vent#trauma#not really art but i couldnt draw a comic it jusg i couldnt#we were talking about my laptop and i thought it crashed because of windows... but apparently my memory was wrong#how many memories did i have that were lies#how many have been changed due to trauma?#why did u have to remind me why did u have to say that why did u tell me you fucking broke it You are so aware u fucked me up#haha i wish remembering something wrong wasnt such a big deal but with trauma anything is fuckng possible#fuck all parents that choose to destroy their kids stuff fuck you fuck you learn actual parenting instead of resorting to trauma...#...as discipline#im gonnd ramble a bit it makes me feel better#but god i actually never considered this to be trauma i mean it is trauma but like i didnt know it affectd me as much as the Trauma#sometimes i forget repeated trauma is a thing#great now i have more trauma to cope from#didnt realize it was ALL CONNECTED
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#u probably cant read that#vent#vent art#my head fucking hurts#i want to be home this place is not home
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my thoughts in oil pastels on colored paper (pt 4)
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i hate my long hair i want to cut it all the time whenever my hair reaches a certain point i hate it i hate seeing it in the mirror it is not me
#i want a hair cut#gender dysphoria#i hate it sm i hate it sm#idk why this is affecting me so much but fuck ing thufck#dysphoria#hair dysphoria#is that a thing?#idk lmao#vent#vent art#me
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this is stupid
#this is stupid and i am gay#vent#comic#WE ARE NOT EVEN THAT CLOSE AND I MISS YOU WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!! but i keep hearing you in class i want to listen to you all day but
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stupid dumb idiot boy who cant stomach their own shit
#emetophobia /#emeto /#its mild but just in case#my anxiety is making me nauseous#taking more than what i can handle haha im so fucking terrible at managing things i cant do shit I CANT DO SHIT AND I CANT HANDLE SHIT WELL#vent art#vent#sona
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Somewhere deep inside my body Has to be the reason for why I’m like this
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brain be like “stop doing fucking anything” noises
#comic#vent comic#vent#vent art#actuallyavoidant#i hate doing anything i keep being so fucking anxious abt everything i fucking do#AvPD
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i have been dismissive about this for too long,,, how long am i willing to stay
#are we really friends? how much do u value me if u dont give a single shit of what i say#it hurts a fuck ton yknow it does#not that they really fucking care anyways#do you guys even give a fuck if i told you both that i feel like you guys give zero shit about me or what i say or fucking do#high school made me realize i could have better friends#i love them so much i finally know what its like to have an even level relationship#god my fucking head hurts today was Rough#vent#i know im suppose to talk abt this shit but god i dont have the same level of trust with either of them to actually think they would conside#ANYTHING about it#idk whatver no complaints no conversation bitch im avoidant and its awful#vent art#ive known them for two long and i still feel this same terrible feeling its been years
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bad memory ramble
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dont like who i am
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