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How does smoking cigarettes “age” your facial features?

1. Stained teeth

“Yellow, nice to meet you.” The nicotine in cigarettes causes discoloration of teeth.

2. Gum disease

If you are a cigarette smoker, “you have twice the risk for gum disease compared with a nonsmoker [1].” Your risk for gum disease increases with every cigarette you smoke. Gum disease causes tooth loss.

3. Lines around the mouth

Cigarette smoking causes lines to form around the mouth, also known as the “smoker’s pucker.”

4. Thinner hair

“Several studies suggest smoking can lead to premature graying and hair loss [2].”

5. Bags under eyes

“If you smoke, you’re four times as likely as nonsmokers to report feeling unrested after a night’s sleep, according to Johns Hopkins study [3].” This lack of rest can lead to bags and dark circles beneath your eyes.

6. Premature aging and wrinkles

“Experts agree that smoking accelerates aging, so that smokers look 1.4 years older than nonsmokers, on average...  Smoking hampers the blood supply that keeps skin tissue looking supple and healthy [4].”

7. Skin loses radiance

In many cigarette smokers, the skin’s natural glow is gone. “Cigarette smoke contains carbon monoxide, which displaces the oxygen in your skin, and nicotine, which reduces blood flow, leaving skin dry and discolored. Cigarette smoking also depletes many nutrients, including vitamin C, which helps protect and repair skin damage [5].“

8. Slow wound healing

“Several studies have found that smokers do not heal as well after surgeries [6]." Some surgeons may even refuse to perform a surgery on a patient who smokes cigarettes.

9. Bigger, redder scars

“Nicotine causes vasoconstriction, a narrowing of the blood vessels that can limit oxygen-rich blood flow to the tiny vessels in the face or other parts of the body. This means your wounds will take longer to heal and you’ll have scars that are bigger and redder than you would in a nonsmoking parallel universe [7].“

10. Cataracts

“Cataracts are a leading cause of blindness in the world. More than 50 percent of Americans will have a cataract or have had cataract surgery by age 80... studies show that people who smoke double their chance of forming cataracts, and the risk continues to increase the more you smoke [8].”

11. Warts

“For reasons that aren’t entirely clear, smokers are more susceptible to infection with human papillomavirus, a large family of viruses that can cause warts—including genital warts. While genital warts are caused by sexually transmitted types of HPV, smoking is also a risk factor. Even taking the number of sex partners into account, women who smoke are nearly four times as likely to have genital warts as nonsmokers, according to one study [9]. ″

12. Age spots

Cigarette smoking is also known to cause age spots and uneven skin tone all over the body, including your face. “In recent years much research has focused on this area and it’s now broadly accepted that a smoker’s skin is damaged by smoking making smokers look much older than non-smokers [10].”

Why age your looks with cigarettes?

On top of all that, smoking cigarettes can also cause weight gain to the stomach area, stretch marks, skin cancer, and psoriasis. And that’s not to mention what it’s doing to your insides...

[1]: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/diseases/periodontal-gum-disease.html [2]: NY Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/20/health/20real.html [3]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#bags-under-your-eyes-0 [4]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#premature-aging-and-wrinkles-0 [5]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#natural-glow-is-gone--0 [6]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#wound-healing-0 [7]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#scarring--0 [8]: All About Vision: http://www.allaboutvision.com/smoking/ [9]: Health.com: http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20340112,00.html#warts-0 [10]: Simply Anti-Aging: http://www.simplyantiaging.com/820/smoking-and-skin-aging/

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“Americans make up an estimated 5% of the world’s population. However, the U.S. uses 25% of the world’s resources - burning up nearly 25% of the coal, 26% of the oil, and 27% of the world’s natural gas [1].”

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Why do plastic bags exist?

“Tens of thousands of whales, birds, seals and turtles are killed every year from plastic bag litter in the marine environment as they often mistake plastic bags for food such as jellyfish [1].”

“Plastic bags, once ingested, cannot be digested or passed by an animal so it stays in the gut. Plastic in an animal’s gut can prevent food digestion and can lead to a very slow and painful death [1].”

“As plastic bags can take up to 1,000 years to break down, once an animal dies and decays after ingesting plastic, the plastic is then freed back into the marine environment to carry on killing other wildlife [1].”

“More than 1 billion single-use plastic bags are given out free of charge everyday. In 2009 the U.S. International Trade Commission reported that 102 billion plastic bags were used in the United States [2].”

“Plastic bags are especially harmful to marine animals, and are one of the most common garbage items on California’s beaches according to the Los Angeles Times. Most starts out as litter on beaches, streets and sidewalks. Stormwater runoff and overwatering flushes them through storm drains or directly to creeks, streams and rivers that lead to the ocean [2].”

What can you do to help?

You can prevent plastic bag pollution by purchasing reusable grocery bags and bringing them with you to the store.

Some bags, like the Grab Bag, conveniently fit into shopping carts and are equipped with a durable travel handle.

When shopping for non-perishable goods, such as clothing and toys, more fashionable cloth bags can be of use.

Are there any downsides to using cloth grocery bags?

Cloth grocery bags can breed bacteria if used improperly.

“A 2011 study from scientists at the University of Arizona and Loma Linda University found only 3% of shoppers with multi-use bags said they regularly washed them. The same study found bacteria in 99% of bags tested; half carried coliform bacteria while 8% carried E. coli, an indicator of fecal contamination [3].”

Bacteria can form in reusable bags when leaks occur from meat, poultry, milk, and pre-cooked foods. The solution? Simply wash your cloth bags after each use, using a hot water cycle, and plenty of detergent [4].

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Ever wonder how easy it is for your child to be abducted? Click the video to find out.

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Violence

Have you ever seen Boondock Saints? The movie begins in a church, with the monsignor giving a speech regarding the 1964 murder of Kitty Genovese.

"And I am reminded, on this holy day, of the sad story of Kitty Genovese. As you all may remember, a long time ago, almost thirty years ago, this poor soul cried out for help time and time again, but no person answered her calls. Though many saw, no one so much as called the police. They all just watched as Kitty was being stabbed to death in broad daylight. They watched as her assailant walked away. Now, we must all fear evil men. But there is another kind of evil which, we must fear most, and that is the indifference of good men."

The quote, "now, we must all fear evil men. But there is another kind of evil which we must fear most, and that is the indifference of good men," has always been one of my personal favorites. I feel that this line is especially powerful, given it's context within the movie.

"The indifference of good men" is the subject I will be writing about, today.

Why is "the indifference of good men" "another kind of evil, which we must fear most" - an evil which we must fear more than "evil men," themselves? When goodness, morality, and truth ignore the wicked, the sinful, and the corrupt, then evil will prevail. The actions of "good” men can, and will, conquer the actions of "evil” men. However, if good men fail to act in the presence of evil men, then evil will not cease, and will likely multiply. If you see a fellow student, who is being bullied, and you fail to act against the bully, you are giving that bully permission to bully his next five victims. By ignoring the bully's actions, your actions are telling him "it's ok. I will look the other way. I can turn the other cheek, and pretend that what you are doing is acceptable. You may bully, in my presence." By ignoring a bully, you are also giving others permission to bully. Perhaps there are other students standing near you, also ignoring the actions of this bully. Perhaps there is a full circle of students standing around, watching the violence unfold, in silent anticipation and excitement. If no one stands up against the bully or defends his victim, other students who are observing may get the idea that violence is "cool," or that it is "a good way to get attention, without consequence." There may be students present who begin to admire the bully, simply because other people fear the bully. The admiring students may interpret the fear that other students feel toward the bully as "respect," and may interpret the bully as possessing "power," or even "popularity." However, there is nothing "cool" or "powerful" about a bully. There is nothing about a bully that demands respect. Fear is not to be misinterpreted as a sign of respect. By picturing such a scene, can you imagine how quickly and deeply one act of violence, created by one violent person, can infect an entire student body? How one violent person on the street can affect all of humanity? However, if just one person were to verbally stand up and speak out in the face of violence, without fear, all of those observing would begin the see the bully for what he truly is; antagonistic, instigating, perpetuating unjustified violence. Unsurprisingly, those observing would likely stand up and defend the original defender, in the event the bully direct his or her violence on the individual who initially spoke out to protect the bully’s original target. Rather than admiring the bully for his perceived “power” over others, the student who stands against the bully becomes the role model that other students begin to admire. The student who uses his/her voice to defend the voiceless is the student who demands respect - not out of fear, but because this student is standing up for a noble cause, and seeking to protect the physical and emotional well-being of an innocent student. This student is to be respected, for displaying brave and courageous acts of kindness toward the bullied student, for taking control over a bad situation, for leading by example, and for not allowing someone to make another person feel “less than,” in his/her presence. This one student possesses the same ability to infect an entire student body with positive vibrations, in much the same way a bully’s negative energy can consume all of those with whom they come into contact.

While standing up to "evil men" is necessary, one should never forget that violence is not the answer. One should not fight violence with violence; doing so only aggravates and expands the original act of violence. Fighting violence with violence sends the message: “your violence is no match for my violence.” However, the truth of the matter remains: “violence is simply not the answer, it is simply not the solution to any problem.”

I urge you, dear reader, to stop violence in it's tracks, and to prevent people from mentally and physically abusing one another. You, alone, possess the ability to change the world. There is no excuse for violence, and there is absolutely no reason for you to participate in, or defend, such acts. By defending violent behavior, you are condoning and promoting violence. By ignoring violent behavior, you are accepting violence and allowing it to perpetuate in more ways than you could ever imagine. Remember; it is better to be alone than in bad company. And all of the bad company that you remove from your life opens up room for you to surround yourself with quality people. In that, you will find much more happiness.

Remember, “you are the company you keep.”

If an act of physical violence is committed against you, immediately document your injuries with photographic evidence. Go to the police, and/or seek medical attention immediately. You do not need to press charges against violent people or take the matter to court, however, there are strength in numbers and it is important for these acts of violence to be documented and collected by the police, in order to prevent violent people from initiating more violence.

If you are in school while this violence occurs, immediately notify the principal, or a trusted teacher. There is no need to suffer in silence; help is always available.

If we all work together, we can (and will) prevent violence. If we work, together, we can help keep our communities safe.

Stay human, Human Flesh

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90% of sexual assault is committed by repeat offenders. [1] Callisto is an information escrow, which helps prevent rape by holding rapists accountable for their crimes. [2/3] https://www.projectcallisto.org/

Sources:

[1] Video: TED Talks: The Reporting System That Sexual Assault Survivors Want [2] Callisto: Official Website [3] Definition: "Escrow"

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Emotional Independence: Self-Love

Your challenge; next time someone approaches you in a negative fashion, make it a point to respond to them in a positive manner. Most people who try to provoke your negative qualities are also focused on their own negative qualities. This is why the old cliché "it takes one to know one" exists. As the late Swiss psychiatrist, Carl Jung, one said: “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”

This is because your perception is like a mirror - that is to say, what you reflect into the world is reflected back at you. Many people find "flaws" in other people, simply because they have identified these "flaws" within themselves. These "flaws" make people feel uncomfortable with themselves; unable to love themselves. People who are not willing to love themselves can often be described as "feeling alone in a room full of people," as they have not yet realized that happiness comes from within. These individuals often feel as separated from themselves as they feel from the people around them. Such feelings of separation within these individuals stems from the fact that no one in the room, including these individuals themselves, can fill the emptiness that they find within; they look around and are unable to find someone willing to satisfy their yearning to be loved. If you feel alone in a roomful of people, it is likely because you do not yet view yourself as your own best friend. You should - after all, you are the only person who will truly be there for you, until the day that you die; you are the only person you can truly depend on.

When you do not know to be there for yourself, you begin to depend too much on other people for emotional fulfillment. You seek others who are willing to do what any best friend should - to pick you up when you're feeling down, to listen, to give good advice, to guide you safely through life's obstacles. Other people may being to find your over-dependence on them draining, and even burdensome, as a result. After all, each of us have our own lives to worry about. The emotional support you seek can, and should, be found within yourself - no one can guide you through life's challenges as well as you can guide yourself. Befriend who you are, at your core, and listen to the still-small voice within. When you are unaware that the emotional contentment you seek exists within yourself, you will constantly seek external validation in order to make yourself "feel better," instead of accepting personal responsibility for your own emotional contentment. When you become emotionally dependent on others to meet your physical, spiritual, emotional, and/or mental needs, you will most often be met with constant disappointment, as most people will refuse to accept the responsibility of guiding another "grown" individual throughout their life's path (as everyone has their own life's path to attend to). [1] Some emotionally dependent people learn from their past relationships, analyzing life's patterns, and evolve into stronger, more independent individuals. Others, however, continue down their lonely paths - eternally the victim of their own design - seeking external validation as a source for happiness, becoming increasingly disappointed, as their needs are continuously met with the unreliability and inattentiveness of others. Fearing disappointment, or even abandonment, individuals struggling with self-love can become spiteful, increasingly co-dependent, judgmental, and harsh. They may begin to act out, and push others away, as if to validate their lack of self-love in a way that says, “see, I am so unlovable that everyone will abandon me, in the end,” unaware that in order for others to love them, one must look inside and find their own inner-beauty. One must look within, focus on the positive, and accept themselves. One must lovingly look into a mirror in order to reflect positive vibrations into the world.

From this inner acceptance, you will find external peace. With such emotional independence comes the freedom, the realization, that nobody’s opinion should matter to you but your own. With an emotionally independent attitude, there is no need to seek the approval of others in order to feel good about yourself. All of your relationships will improve once you learn to love yourself, for that is when you truly know how to love others. When you choose to focus on your own negative qualities, you reflect these negative vibrations out into the world - you can become as critical and judgmental of others as you have learned to become of yourself. Individuals who have not yet come to love themselves often view themselves as an enemy, rather than as a friend. In order to attack their enemy, these individuals become self-destructive - seeking out and focusing on their own flaws, and projecting these flaws unto others. Projection is a defense mechanism; it can make you feel "safe" to disassociate yourself from your own "flaws," by pushing your perceived "flaws" on other people. In doing so, you can mentally distance yourself from your "flaws," in order to view them in a more objective way. [2] While this objectivity makes your "flaws" more comfortable to think about, by placing them at a "safe" distance, the mental and emotional detachment created through this defense mechanism further separates you from your true self, as you perpetuate denial about your own true nature. Projecting causes you to treat others in a negative way in order to feel positively about yourself.

When you look into the mirror in an unloving manner, you damage your perception, causing you to reflect your own inner negativity back at the world; human behavior is the mirror to the human soul.

Miserable people attempt to make others miserable, so that they feel less alone in their own misery. Likewise, happy people want to share their joy with others, thus encouraging the best in people. Your perceptions shapes your thoughts, and your thoughts manifest into your behavior. Negative, unloving people seek conflict and, if you don’t give it to them, they can easily become embarrassed of their negative attitude. If you reflect positivity and love toward these individuals, in response to their negativity, you may be able to help alter the image that these lost souls reflect. I often hear people complain, “I can’t change the world, I’m only one person.” To me, that has always been an undeniably weak excuse - and excuse which allows one to feel alright with being too lazy to truly care, or to even attempt to make a difference. You must “be the change you wish to see in the world,” as change does, indeed, always begin with just one person. If you think people need to be more friendly on the streets and smile at each other, then smile first. If you think people need to have more patience and kindness while waiting in line, practice those behaviors, yourself. You may be surprised at how much one person’s positive attitude can infect all of the people they come into contact with, through positive vibrations. These vibrations, in turn, may spread from the people you interact with, affecting the people they interact with. Such interactions with others often creates a ripple affect, in which you personally have the power to influence acquaintances you have never met, through the interactions you have had with those closest to them. For example, if someone approaches you in a negative fashion, declaring “you suck. You’re an ugly person,” your positive to neutral emotions can quickly become infected with negativity. You may take what was said to you to heart, ignoring the fact that the person who said it may have simply been having a bad day. You could let their negativity ruin your day, and you could go on to insult someone else, and ruin their day. “After all,” you may think, “if someone has the right to ruin my day, why shouldn’t I ruin someone else’s day?” This would be an example of an unfortunate ripple affect. However, one drop of positivity can create its own ripple affect, stopping negative vibrations in their tracks. By keeping your own inner peace and sense of self, you could easily determine “I know I am beautiful. I most definitely do not ‘suck.’ This person must be having a terrible day. Perhaps there is something I could do or say, to brighten up their day just a little, or at least make them rethink their behavior toward me.” You can end the perpetual cycle of negativity, either by being positive to the person who was negative toward you, or by not allowing their negativity to affect the way you positively interact with others. If you allow yourself to do so, you can know yourself better than anyone else knows you; you can love yourself better than anyone else can and, in turn, you can spread that love to others. Learn to love yourself, for all of your quirks and perceived “flaws,” as well as for your strengths.  Go out of your way to reflect positive vibrations, and to make people smile. You may be surprised at the positive affect your kindness can have on the world around you. You may even be surprised at how rewarding and fulfilling spreading happiness can be. After all, we all struggle with our own life challenges. You never know what someone else is truly going through. And we are all just walking each other home. Much love, Human Flesh

Sources:

[1] Emotional Dependency: Are You In Love, Or Are You Emotionally Dependent? [2] Changing Minds: What is Projection? [3] Changing Minds: What is Social Comparison Theory?

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How To Quit Smoking Cigarettes

Addiction is a hard habit to break, but it can become as easy as just saying "no." You have the power to break your addiction to cigarettes, before it breaks you. Quitting cigarettes is a different experience for everyone, based on lifestyle choices, will-power, and self-control. However, there are certain tricks that are helpful for everyone. After much trial and error, and three separate attempts at "quitting for good," I have finally realized what works best for me. This article contains the seven realizations which have helped me the most, which you may also use to help yourself to kick your addiction to cigarettes, once and for all.

1. Make the decision to change your lifestyle. As I’m sure you are aware, no one can make this decision except for you. No matter how many loved ones nag you to quit, you will never kick your habit until you decide it is time! In fact, your loved one’s nagging may annoy you to the point of smoking more, in attempts to alleviate all of the pressure that their well-intentioned expectations are making you feel. You do not have to come to the decision to quit in an extreme fashion; in fact, I encourage you to quit far before you ever reach rock-bottom. However, no matter your reasons for making the decision to quit, your reasons must be personally relevant for you, in order for you to achieve the goal of maintaining long-term results in your decision to end your relationship with smoking. 2. Analyze your habits. Do you smoke every time you drive? After every meal? In the shower? Right after you wake up? With your morning coffee? Smoking is a habit which is dependent upon the habits surrounding it. By recognizing the habits surrounding your smoking, you gain the power of becoming more aware of what triggers your cravings. With the power that comes from this awareness, both triggers and cravings are easy to avoid, eliminate, or even build up the courage to face head-on, by preparing yourself and gathering strength to say "no," when you know in advance that your triggers will be present. 3. Hold yourself accountable; do not enable yourself by "bumming" cigarettes from other people. One of the many methods I used, in attempt to quit cigarettes, was based in the thought: “I just won’t buy another pack. If I don’t have anything to smoke, then I won’t smoke.” I was naive. I continued frequenting bars, consequently putting myself in terrible environments for a newborn "former smoker." I was going to places where I used to be a smoker, surrounding myself with the people I used to smoke with. Once I had started drinking for the night, it became increasingly impossible for me to resist the ever-dreaded question “mind if I get one of those?” Bumming cigarettes is not fun for anyone. It is not fun for you, when you feel like a failure the next morning because you are not making any progress toward your goal. Nor is it fun for you in the moment, once people eventually begin to roll their eyes at their "charity" toward you. Bumming cigarettes often annoys other people. If their annoyance does not happen immediately, it will grow in time. After all, why would they want to pay for your addiction? Most people struggle to afford their own. When you bum cigarettes, you look selfish, as you continue to support your own habit by using the generosity of others as a way to get your "fix," while (in most cases) allowing yourself remain in a state of denial about, or even justify, your own selfish behavior. Bumming cigarettes makes you look weak, especially when the people you are bumming from know that you are trying to quit. Even if you attempt to negate their annoyance by offering them monetary compensation in exchange for the cigarette, you will still look and feel as if you possess no self-control or will-power - not a very noble image of yourself to portray to others. By bumming cigarettes, you are also putting someone in the position of becoming an enabler. You are asking them to help you break the rules that you have created for yourself by not buying a pack, when you should accept personal responsibility, and stand behind your decision to quit. Do not enable yourself, and do look for others to enable you; you will never quit, if you do. Do yourself a favor, and get the phrase “mind if I get one of those?” out of your head, right now. Just drop the whole idea. 4. Recognize that people, themselves, can be triggers. Ever have a friend from high school who, no matter how many years the two of you have spent apart, you can always pick up right where you left off? Suddenly, you are acting like you are in the 9th grade all over again, giggling like children over trivial school-yard topics, or feeling like rebellious teenagers who are out to chain-smoke cigarettes and take on the world. People have the ability to get you to revert back to an old way of thinking, based off of the memories you have of them. Whenever the majority of your favorite memories with someone consists of “bonding” over cigarettes, it is extremely hard to watch that person smoke in your presence without caving in, and joining them for a smoke, "just like old times." Hanging out with someone who triggers your cravings can be extremely detrimental to your progress, if you aren’t prepared to handle such strong temptation. It is too easy to give in to your cravings and ask your trigger if you can bum one from them, especially because you likely know that they would be more than happy to share (at least at first). Often, these people will even go out of their way to enable you, by offering you a cigarette, knowing you well enough to know that it is probably all you can do not to ask them for one. I know from experience how hard it is to abandon the habit of bumming in the first place, let alone developing the strength to say “no, thank you,” once a cigarette has been offered to you, especially when it has been offered to you by one of your triggers. However, think of it this way: if you feel empty and lost while your trigger smokes without you, then you should rest-assured that they probably feel just as empty and lost - and for all the same reasons. Up until this point, your bond with this person has likely been built upon the "social habit" of smoking cigarettes, and so, once you break your addiction, you inadvertently break the social bonds you have created with this person through your habit. Some of your triggers, you will outgrow. You will come to realize that cigarettes were genuinely the only interest that the two of you had ever had in common; the only reason or excuse you ever had to talk to them, in the first place. It will come as no loss to let that, particular, relationship go. It will become easy to demote that person's priority level in your life, and to only see that person on occasion or in passing, as you realize that their presence does not benefit your life’s journey, nor does your presence benefit theirs; you are simply walking down two separate paths, on this journey called "life." Some of your triggers, however, will grow with you. You will gain mutual admiration for one another as they both respect and support your decision to quit smoking, making you feel good about yourself as your goal becomes more rewarding to reach, due to their external validation. Your bond with them will strengthen as you learn to relate to them on deeper levels than your addiction had offered. Your persistence in quitting may also eventually inspire some of your triggers to quit smoking cigarettes themselves, which will only add to the ever-growing list of things you two have in common, bringing the two of you that much closer together. How people respond to your decision to quit smoking will often make or break your relationship with them. Smoking can be an extremely social habit and, as such, it should be expected that the absence of this habit can and will affect your social relationships. Be prepared to deal with the highs and the lows of relationship building and relationship loss, once you decide to end your addiction to cigarettes. 5. Surround yourself with positive people, who support you and want to see you succeed. It does not matter whether or not these people are smokers or non-smokers, as long as you are strong enough to handle the temptations of being in the presence of active smokers. If you find it too difficult to say "no" to cigarettes while they are present, you should think about refraining from spending excessive amounts of time with the people in your life who continue to smoke, until you feel strong enough to stick to your guns in the midst of temptation. The decision to simultaneously end my relationship with alcohol and the bar scene, altogether, helped my journey toward quitting a successful journey, as I had always been one of the many people who just can’t seem to drink without enjoying a smoke. While this decision was mostly made in order to put a stop to my borderline alcoholism (and my excessive spending due to the combination of said addictions), I simply realized, on the most basic level, that the bar scene was a bad environment to attempt to quit smoking in. There were simply too many temptations. Once I stopped bringing myself to the bar, I began hanging out more frequently with one of my friends; a single mother, and non-smoker. Her and her only child became good distractions to keep my mind off of both drinking and smoking. We constantly filled our time with enjoyable, mentally stimulating activities. I found it refreshing to spend time with someone who was not continuously reminding me of cigarettes by needing to take persistent “smoke breaks.” The experience had been good for everyone, as we were all benefited by the presence of one another; I helped create a new dynamic in their lives, which kept them entertained, and they had become my answer to walking away from the negative lifestyle I had been living. I had always despised smoking around children, regardless, and so it became even easier for me to quit, once I had suddenly found myself frequently in the presence of one. Consciously changing my environment from “the bar scene” to a more family-based environment is one of the things which had helped me the most. I made the decision not to think about cigarettes while spending time with mother and child and, even though I would crave them from time to time in the beginning, it eventually became second-nature to find something fun to distract myself with, rather than to focus on, and eventually give into, my cravings. 6. The power of quitting cold-turkey. I had tried quitting smoking by employing various tactics before I had finally decided that quitting cold-turkey was the only method which was truly effective for me. Throughout my "trial and error" process, I once limited my smoking by telling myself “no cigarettes before noon." This method had worked, to an extent; not smoking until later in the day had seemed to curb my appetite for cigarettes, however, I was still feeding my addiction. I had not truly quit; I was simply moderating my addiction while still allowing it to exist, much like people who smoke e-cigarettes long-term (without any apparent intention of using their e-cigarette as a tool to wean themselves off of nicotine) have not truly quit. Limiting my smoking with the thought: “no cigarettes during the day, only at the bar,” had proven itself even more dangerous. Instead of smoking less, I ended up smoking more. I thought this technique would work, as I had began my addiction to cigarettes, in the first place, as a “social smoker.” I assumed that becoming a “social smoker” once again would be easy and that it would be an excellent compromise; I thought that I wouldn’t need to quit, if I could simply moderate my smoking while at the bar. However, once I was drunk and surrounded by smokers, the deprivation I had felt during the day had manifested itself in the form of overindulgence. I began to feel like I “earned” the whole pack, because I had been “so ‘good’ throughout the day;” a deadly reward system which I quickly learned to regret, as even my drunk self had realized that this method was a bad idea. I started giving my cigarettes away to random people while drunk, knowing I was weak enough to smoke the entire pack if I had not. In my state, in America, where cigarettes average $10 a pack, my smoking had become an extremely expensive habit, costing me anywhere between $70-100 a week. Having the self-discipline to consistently tell yourself and your triggers "no" - to make the decision not smoke another cigarette, whether bummed, offered, or bought - is the only method to genuinely ensure long-term success, in your goal of becoming a former smoker. 7. Think of your health, and choose to make your physical well-being a priority. Do you have children? If you do, you may want to live to see the day your children marry, or the day you become a grandparent (or perhaps even great-grandparent). I imagine that those reasons, alone, should be motivation enough to make you want to prolong your life, by ending your addiction to cigarettes. As someone who has no children, I needed to make the decision entirely based on my own personal well-being, and not for the way my habit will affect the people in my life, in the future. Observing the way that cigarettes have affected the health of others in my life helped me put my own health into perspective. A family friend I had known since I was a small child, for example, had smoked my entire life. Eventually, his addiction caught up with him; he was diagnosed with Pulmonary Fibrosis and Emphysema, and was in desperate need of a double-lung transplant (which he has since been lucky enough to receive). Seeing this man in all stages of health has inspired me to quit smoking, and to never start again. I have no desire to breathe life through another person’s lungs (although I am glad such technology exists to save the lives of people who need that second chance). I also had my own health concerns which lead me to my decision to quit smoking cigarettes - mostly regarding how smoking affected my singing; from my dry mouth, all the way to my exhausted diaphragm. I love singing, and had previously considered myself to be quite good at it. I had already learned from my previous two attempts at quitting that my level of ability came and went with my cigarette smoking. My lung capacity became smaller when I had smoked, and I could no longer hold notes as long or as steadily as I used to; I became easily winded. I felt phlegm in my lungs, which I would often cough up. The phlegm would become lodged in my throat, and I would have a hard time getting it out; it coated my vocal chords, and effected every aspect of my singing. My voice would crack, and would become hoarse. I would run out of breath, gasp for air, or have to stop singing in order to cough... this decline in ability became discouraging, and the disappointment I felt as a result only succeeded in creating enough stress for me to reach for another cigarette! I couldn’t help but wonder how all of my favorite musicians managed to smoke cigarettes, and still become successful. I decided, “maybe cigarettes effect them differently than they effect me,” and that, as “cool” as I thought my musician role models were, there was nothing “cool” about hacking up a lung. I decided that, while smoking cigarettes may have worked for many of these musical inspirations, it did not work for me. Anyone who tells you that smoking is “cool” is full of it, whether they express the sentiment verbally, or through imagery. There is nothing “cool” about torturing yourself with a slow death. Best of luck to you, as you embark on your own journey toward recovery. Feel free to post your own reasons for quitting cigarettes, below! Hope this helps, Human Flesh

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Your Story

Go write the story of your life. Wake up with intention; write it one day at a time.

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Cigarette Addiction

I have had many types of relationships with cigarettes, throughout my lifetime. When I was a child, both of my parents were smokers, and I hated it. They chain-smoked around me constantly, both in the car, and inside our home. I didn’t like the smell - how it choked me out, and made me feel like I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t like how my parents ignored my complaints, and chain-smoked in front of me, anyway. I didn’t like how unloved I felt once I had learned about the danger of cigarettes in school, and had become aware that my parents had already known about the hazards of second-hand smoke; they just didn’t care. I would tell them, “it’s one thing for you to slowly kill yourself with cigarettes, it’s another for you to kill me, too!” I decided that they were selfish; I realized that they would rather indulge in this destructive vice wherever and whenever they wanted, with no regard to the well-being of those around them, than to limit their addiction. As I got older, some of my friends started smoking. I tried to be more open-minded about the addiction, because I had decided that no one wanted a friend who was going to constantly nag them, or complain, when the reason they were smoking in the first place was to “escape” and “unwind.” Eventually, I became so open-minded and accepting of cigarettes that I had decided to start smoking, myself. I was away at college, living in a city. I would go to the bars, and use smoking as a means for socialization. I had always been somewhat socially awkward, but cigarettes had become a great excuse for me to change my environment, and even allowed me to affect the timing of social situations. For example, as a smoker, I had possessed the ability to politely avoid someone, by watching them smoke through the window and timing my beer to their cigarette. Once they would come inside, I’d let them watch me chug down my last gulp of beer, return the glass to the bar, and let them know I was going out for a smoke, with a faux-apologetic “sorry, I just missed ya! I’m smoking, now” hand gesture, given from across the bar, on my way out. I would then stay outside until they had come back out for another cigarette, whereupon I would go inside and order another drink, deep within the bar, where I could meet other people who’s company seemed more appealing. I began to depend on cigarettes for social interaction, and eventually became extremely addicted. My nighttime addiction had began haunting me throughout the day, and I often found myself smoking cigarettes alone; usually clearing my thoughts, and drinking coffee. I could no longer use the phrase “social smoker” to justify my habit. The saddest part of my addiction was that I absolutely hated almost every cigarette that I smoked. They made me feel sick, dizzy, weak, deprived of oxygen. They made me feel older, and in the years that I smoked, I noticed a significant aging in my physical appearance, as well. My teeth were turning yellow, from all the coffee and smoke. Depending on which tobacco I was smoking, my fingernails would also turn yellow. My hair, clothes, hands, and breath all smelled worse than an ashtray, and all of the gum and perfume in the world couldn’t help me. In time, I developed a terrible cough, which I avoided acknowledging for a long time. I made excuses for myself in order to avoid the truth; that my addiction was killing me. I ignored my hoarse voice, my scratchy throat, and the phlegm in my lungs for so long, that my coughs eventually began producing blood. I still wouldn’t quit. I had always considered my favorite musicians to be my “role models,” and watching them smoke gave me the impression that it was “the cool thing to do.” Often, while considering whether or not to quit smoking, I would remind myself of these musicians, deciding that if I had quit cigarettes, I would quit “being cool.”

Smoking wasn’t simply just a habit or a lifestyle to me, back then; it was an attitude. Being a smoker simply wasn’t enough - only active smoking portrayed that “attitude” I was looking for, causing me to chain-smoke.

Peter Doherty (Babyshambles/The Libertines) lighting a cigarette off a burning guitar.

Some smokers even exude a certain level of sex appeal, when participating in their addiction.

Kate Moss (above), with a cigarette hanging from her lips.

Kate Moss (below) applying lipstick, with a cigarette in her hand. Doherty, like many other musicians, does a great job of making cigarettes look “cool,” while Moss presents an image of sophistication, glamour, and sex appeal. Both individuals make smoking look incredibly appealing. So much so, that we sometimes forget there there is nothing “cool,” or “sexy” about cigarettes. [1] As you can tell from examining the bottom picture, this image lacks practicality. While it may appear as if this picture was taken spur-of-the-moment, this image is actually very planned, and calculated. In both of the images featuring Moss, each of the burning cigarettes possess a trail of ashes. If you are a smoker, you may be aware that trails of ashes are most often found on cigarettes when they have not moved for a while. Once the cigarette has moved, the trail of ashes often breaks off, and falls away from the cigarette. As Kate Moss is a model, it should come as no surprise that she had been posing for each of these pictures, and not actually actively smoking. The image of Moss applying lipstick with one hand, while holding a cigarette with the other, had the premeditated intention of portraying smoking in a glamorous light. The cigarette and the lipstick are both props, and the purpose of using the lipstick as a prop is to make the cigarette look more innocent, more appealing, more “glamorous.” In a way, the lipstick distracts the eye away from the cigarette, toward Moss’ lips. With very little use of imagination, one could easily visualize the cigarette at Moss' lips, and thus the idea is born in one’s mind: “Kate Moss is classy, she smokes cigarettes. Cigarettes can be very glamorous and fashionable.” Such an image is used as a subtle marketing tool, whose purpose is to create the idea in the minds of a female audience that a cigarette is not merely just a prop in a picture; a cigarette is a glamorous, sexy accessory for life. I mean, when you really think about it, who actually applies lipstick three puffs into a cigarette, anyway? It is relevant to note that many celebrities pose for the camera with cigarettes in tow. These are not simply images of people who are going for an afternoon walk, and happen to be smoking a cigarette; these are planned photo-shoots, in which cigarettes are a calculated prop. There are, honestly, far too many photographs in existence of cigarette-smoking celebrities posing for the camera - celebrities who are not only condoning cigarettes, but who are choosing to make smoking look like an appealing, or even fun, activity. Why? Cigarettes have been "designed" by greedy, money-hungry corporations, to make people look "cool," in order to maximize the amount of people who smoke. [2] “Looking cool” gives many consumers a reason to pick up their first pack of cigarettes. These corporations aren’t just selling a product, they are selling a fabricated belief that their product represents an “attitude” - that they are the image of “cool.”

When, in reality, most people these days are too educated and too intelligent to smoke. Most people find the idea that “smoking is cool” to be outdated. In fact, people are often repulsed by the scent, annoyed by many smoker’s constant “need” to take breaks. Contrary to popular belief, it does not make you look “cool” to be a slave to your own habits, especially to the extent where you are wasting other people’s time with your constant need to take smoke breaks. It does not look “cool” to purposely allow yourself to smell awful. It does not look “cool” to have self-imposed health issues.

These days, anytime I see someone puffing on a cancer stick, I can only think “what an idiot. Wasting time, wasting money, ruining the quality and longevity of their lives.. and for what?” When someone finds the need to justify their addiction, their idiocy in my eyes simply increases.

Cigarette corporations soak their tobacco in so many chemicals that, after the first pack, many people become addicted. These consumers no longer need a reason to buy another pack of cigarettes, they simply do. At that point, consumers have already been psychologically tricked, and are now physically addicted, as the addictive chemicals which had been released in their brains from the previous pack had created the illusion of an "enjoyable experience." Buying and smoking cigarettes then becomes a habit, and the corporation has succeeded in converting a “new customer” to a “repeat customer.” But, when you really stop and think about it, how cool are cigarettes, anyway? When you smoke a cigarette, it says "I don't care." "I don't care about my health. I don’t care about developing any of a long list of disease, such as COPD, cancer, or emphysema." "I don't care that a growing portion of my income goes to greedy cigarette corporations." [3] "I don't care that I am spending tons of money developing a disease I will need to spend even more money on treating, while desperately hoping for a cure." "I don't care that I smell and taste like an ashtray." "I don't care if I give second hand smoke to others, even children, because my addiction means more to me than other people's health." "I don't care that I am littering Mother Nature with my fiberglass filters."   Smoking cigarettes also says, "Yes, I trust fully in insurance companies and the medical system to cure me and not just 'treat' me with experimentation,"

None of that seems very "cool" to me.

Think about it. Human Flesh

Sources: [1] Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Heath Effects of Cigarette Smoking [2] American History: Smithsonian: 20th Century Tobacco Advertisements [3] The Awl: What a Pack of Cigarettes Costs, in Every State

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Self mutilation

Dear reader,

Do you know someone who has caused physical harm to their bodies? Do you know someone who drags a razor blade across their skin?

Have you ever cut yourself?

I used to have to answer this question with a “yes.” As such, I can personally relate to this topic. If you have answered “yes,” yourself, I would then like you to ask yourself, “why?” Does your answer come to you as easily, this time? If you are anything like me, you probably have a few reasons as to why you choose to harm yourself. One of the reasons I had cut was out of disrespect. At first, it was because I did not respect myself, and I did not respect the gift of life that I had been given, I did not respect my parents for bringing me into this “cruel world,” when they did not seem to appreciate my existence. This disrespect had created a "victim mentality," making me extremely sensitive to the external world, and the criticism of others. I had then began to cut because of the pain I had felt, as a result of my perceived isolation from the external world, and the hyper-sensitivity my victim mentality had created within me.

There were also times I would cut out of spite. For example, once I had discovered that my mother had learned of my cutting, but that she had chose to ignore my desperate pleas for help, I had began digging deeper, as the feeling that nobody cared whether I was alive or dead had then felt completely validated, and that feeling of “being unloved” consumed me. My decision to cut out of spite was another form of disrespect; one which was targeted wildly toward others, as I had wanted them to feel the pain which had consumed me - pain which they seemed happy to ignore. I did not realize that the only person I had been emotionally damaging, through my psychological warfare, was myself. Another reason I cut was because life seemed so pointless. I had spent many of the early years of my life questioning everything. I questioned my existence, and the existence of others. I questioned why public school was a necessity. I questioned why my family expected me to live a cookie-cutter life, void of creativity, in which I felt I had absolutely no freedom to follow my own dreams, or pursue the areas of life in which I was the most passionate. I was never encouraged to be myself, or to do what made me happy. Instead, I felt constantly pressured to go down the paths, in life, that my family had directed me toward, without any regard as to my wants or interests. I was to do what made them happy, with no regards to my own happiness. I had no control, no autonomy, no sense of fulfillment or purpose. I had no hope for the future. My past was filled with pain, my present was hopeless. I felt as if I needed an escape. It seemed that every time the fires of my passion toward a particular subject were ignited, discouragement just as quickly filled my ears - like a wet blanket, smoldering the flames of my dreams. It is no wonder that being expected to live my life to please others, rather than creating a fulfilling life for myself, had begun to make me increasingly suicidal. In my mind, every time I cut, I was flirting with suicidal ideation. I was not fortunate enough to have parents who encouraged my wants, who believed in my dreams and genuinely wanted to see me pursue them, toward a path of happiness. Instead, I had an alcoholic mother who chased me down dead-end roads, which led to misery, where I felt trapped, as if there was no way back. I had a father who was seldom present, as he traveled for work. I woke up every day miserable to go to school, where I was bullied and was too introverted to ever make any friends. And then I was even more miserable to go home to a house full of people who’s primary hobby was to upset and belittle me. Call it boredom, call it depression... call it what you will. But cutting became my own hobby; a way to occupy my mind, to distract myself from all of the hurtful things people had done and said to me throughout the day. In that regard, cutting became my escape. I hated life. I was extremely prone to mental breakdowns. I would cry for hours, rocking myself back and forth, repeating “I want to go home” - over, and over again. It made no sense - it didn’t have to. I simply did not want to be alive. I did everything I could to try to self-soothe and cope, but I was never given the resources to successfully do so, on my own. I didn’t get it. I didn’t understand why I was here. I had no purpose, in life, and I wasn’t surrounded by many people who did. I had no reason or passion for living; I felt trapped, as if I were a prisoner of life, a prisoner of unfortunate circumstance - constantly reminded of how much worse off other people were, and how grateful I should be for my unfulfilling life, which was meant to serve others... and I wanted to be free from this harshness, this coldness, this lack of understanding. I wanted to be free from the demands, free from the abuse. I wanted to be free from this planet, and the society which inhabits it. Every day became a struggle of life and death for me. The best word to describe the feeling would be “anguish.” [1] I found strange comfort in manifesting my mental and emotional pain in a physical way. I’ve since learned the scientific reason why. The act of cutting floods your brain with its own natural chemicals, such as “endorphins, which gives you a rush, and a sense of calmness and relief that makes you feel like everything is ok.” [2] I had become addicted to this rush. And (as I have found through my experience with all forms of addiction in later years), addiction is one of the hardest struggles one can overcome in life - it is even harder to overcome addiction than it is to overcome depression, itself. Eventually, I came to the realization that I was truly was ungrateful. I was not given a nurturing, understanding upbringing. I felt misunderstood, unloved... But regardless of one’s circumstances, there is beauty to be found, everywhere you look.

I did not appreciate all of the positivity which was present in my life, I did not appreciate the beauty and strength I had within. I did not realize that the beauty and strength within me would always outweigh any external demands which made me feel that I was “less than,” or tried to change me. I didn’t appreciate simple things like going outside for a walk, stopping to smell the roses, because I was too caught up in my own problems. While there were many things for me to be unhappy about, I eventually realized that there was an equal amount (if not greater amount) to feel fortunate about. I had finally realized that I was just a spoiled brat with a victim mentality. I had too much time on my hands, which I wasn’t making the most of, and could not understand just how good I had it. Sure, I did not have the most supportive, understanding, or loving parents; but at least I had parents. We may not have lived in the nicest house in town, but we had a roof over our heads. We had food in our bellies - and usually at least two times a day, at that. As I got older, it hit me - happiness is just a state of mind. Happiness is a decision. You can literally choose to be happy. It is all about your perspective. You could sit around on the sidelines, doing nothing, looking at life through the lens of depression, where everything is blue - or you could put on your rose-colored glasses, become an active participant, and start living! Once I came to this realization, I started getting excited about life! I slowly began to conquer my six-year-long struggle with depression. I approached situations differently, by changing my thinking. Everyone perceives situations differently, and by changing my perception, I changed my life. For example, let’s say there is a homeless man sitting on a park bench near the grocery store, in your city. You are on your way into the store, by foot. You are forced to pass by him on your journey. What do you think? What do you do? When I was depressed, I might have ignored him completely, either accidentally or intentionally. I might have been so wrapped up in my own “problems” and was “too busy” looking down, unaware of my surroundings, that he may have gone unnoticed. Or, I may have noticed him, and immediately thought of all the depressing bills I needed to pay. I may have decided I wasn’t much better off myself. I may have been stuck in a “lack-mentality,” and might have felt that I did not have enough to share. If that were the case, I may have avoided eye contact in order to feel less obligated to extend help my fellow human being. By changing my perception, however, I saw the homeless man not as a burden, but as an opportunity for growth; for both of us. As a broke college student, it felt easy for me to “pass the buck.” [3] I could have decided “I only have $20 to my name, and I need it... someone else will help him.” I could have continued on my way feeling extremely guilt free; I may have even forgotten all about the event by the time I laid my head down, at night, in my comfortable bed, with a full belly and a roof over my head. However, shifting my perspective not only made me feel more personally responsible for my own well-being, but for the well-being of others. I gave this man the simple courtesy of acknowledgement - a smile and a nod - before continuing on, toward the store. The man looked so grateful just to have been seen - he must have been so used to being overlooked or ignored, as if he was less of a human than the people who had passed him, simply due to his appearance; a mark of his class. While in the store, the grateful smile he had shown me had prompted me to reach a decision; I would buy $10 worth of goods for myself, and spend the other $10 on the man outside the store. After all, when I looked on the bright side, I was going to be getting a paycheck in 3-4 days, while there was no guarantee if or when this man would receive income again. I decided that $10 was a small sacrifice to make, for this opportunity of growth. As I passed by this man for the last time, I handed him a bag containing items such as water, trail-mix, and fruit. Not only had that small action made his day; it had made my own. You get what you give, in life, and as shocking as it may be to hear, life is just a game. And it’s not how you win or lose, it’s how you play. You will never succeed in the game of life by sitting on the sidelines, focusing your energy on negative thoughts, feelings, and actions. You will never succeed by imposing your negativity into the lives of others. You will never win the game of life by idly watching life pass you by, jealous of the way other people are playing, while you do nothing but brood in self-imposed misery. The only way you can win this game of life is by getting excited about it! You need to become an active participant in your own life, and have fun doing it! If you’re not having fun living life, then you’re not doing it right. We live in a world where the possibilities are virtually endless. Literally anything could happen, at literally any moment... what’s not exciting about that?! So stop waiting for your life to happen - go out and make it happen! Put down the razor, and pick up anything else... a pen, a paintbrush, a guitar, a ladle, or even some crochet needles! Find what you love, and pursue it; it’s that easy.

Make an effort, today, to spread a little love. Make this world a more enjoyable place to live, for us all.

Much love, Human Flesh

Sources: [1] Definition: “Anguish.” [2] Dawson’s Blog: What Happens to Your Body When You Cut? [3] Definition: “Pass the Buck.”

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Who am I, and what do I want?

Hello. My name is Human Flesh, and I am here to make the world a better place. In this blog, I will write about topics which directly affect humanity - from life to death. I will share my thoughts on subjects such as pregnancy, abortion, parenting, gender, sexuality, addiction, mental illness, physical disease, suicide, murder, homelessness, war, peace, environmentalism - YOU name it, as I encourage you to become an active participant in these discussions. This blog is meant to be a platform whose intention is to open the door for conversation. My goal is to bring people from all walks of life together, in one space, in order to both spark and fuel the flames of passion toward humanity. I would like you to share your thoughts and the experiences you have had with Life on Earth. We all perceive the Human Experience very differently, but this does not mean that we need to fear one another, argue, or war. There are many people on this Earth who are lost. They lack understanding, acceptance, respect, and often times, love. Rather than further deprive these individuals of such positive vibrations, I would like to encourage these individuals to be the best they can be; to live their lives to the fullest, to find clarity amid the fog of confusion this fast-paced, technological world surrounds us in. I am here to offer love, support, advice, and understanding. If anything is troubling you, or if you have any questions about your life here, on Earth, please feel free to contact me. You are never alone.

With love, Human Flesh