highfivingyourself

[highfivingyourself]

for a while things were really bad, I didn't know if I was gonna get SSI or not and I couldn't leave bed to even grab a couple things from the grocery store. I worried about homelessness every day. I started this disabled self care blog and it helped me heal a lot from the guilt I felt for needing so much help, as well as other things. I developed so much guilt from things like employers being mad at me when I had to leave work early or being told by my therapists it's my fault I can't work bc I don't do yoga and meditate and also just a capitalist culture in which a person's value is based on their work and/or wealth. but yeah I quit therapy and developed a lot of coping skills on my own here that actually helped me a lot. Eventually I didn't have to do them anymore. It felt kinda weird to stop, like maybe I'd fall into old patterns again but I miraculously rid myself of ableist guilt. Sometimes I succeed really well at shit. That guilt hasn't come back but things have been really difficult lately. A lot of painful things kept happening back to back. A friend’s murder, another friend OD’d 2 weeks later, the domino effect that’s had on his family/my loved ones in every possible aspect of their life, getting broken up with in a confusing somewhat open ended way??, my own financial problems, a falling out with a close friend as well as a few other friends, being forced to see family and it triggering ptsd symptoms I haven’t had for years, and a kidney infection. All in 1 month’s time.  I'm just trying to get through it in the healthiest way possible. I've been taking up a lot of the coping skills I used here again, but using them in ways that are relevant to my current situation. I'm mostly just waiting it out until I feel somewhat normal again. But I’m hurting a lot and doing everything I can to ease the pain and start enjoying myself again while trying not to suppress anything.

[highfivingyourself]

“1. You are not crazy [edit: for noticing racism. Having a mental illness does not invalidate you. <3 HFY] 2. Being a person of colour is not a pathology, even if you're told otherwise every single waking moment of your life.

3. History is against you. The institutions are against you even though they espouse the language of inclusion and diversity.

4. When someone commits an act of violence against you, you are not sensitive if you call them out. You are stating a fact: "Please remove your hockey stick from my ass. Now."

5. This being said, there is nothing wrong with being sensitive. As Winona Ryder said, "I'm so sick of people shaming women for being sensitive or vulnerable. It's so bizarre to me." The same can be said for people of colour.

6. As your bruise blooms, know that the pain is real. Someone fucked you up. It is not in your head. You did not invent this for attention.

7. When someone commits an act of violence against you, they are responsible for their mistake. They may make it about your reaction, rather than about their transgression because they are evading responsibility. They are in the wrong.

8. When you call someone out on their violence, and their response is "I'm sorry you were offended" it is as if they never apologized. You may continue to be angry. You are not being petty or emotional.

9. The right response to being called out on fuckery is, "I am sorry. I made a mistake."

10. When someone doubles down with a racist response when being called out for acting in a racist fashion, it's not you, it's them.

11. You may respond to "Can't you take a joke?" with "Dude, you're not fucking funny. You're no Aziz Ansari or Ali Wong."

12. There are people who will wield the words "free speech" to cut you down when you critique them because they believe they have the right to say anything they want without consequence. You are not afforded this same privilege.

13. If you object to anything they say or do, they will tell you that you're the thought police. They will accuse you of doing all the things that they are doing. They will accuse you of being a victim while calling you a bully.

14. They think they are good people. In their minds, this makes you the villain.

15. If you stay silent or say the words they want to hear, you will be told that you're articulate.

16. When they want you to know that they still have power over you even after you have pwned them so hard on national television, they will praise you for being gracious.

17. They believe that you are measuring yourself against their approval, their person, without knowing that the sun has set on that bloody empire. You are woke.

18. The reason why everything feels so heavy is that structural racism exists. It colours every interaction that you have, no matter what you do. It is why you feel powerless. You know that you cannot trust the law or the state to stand behind you even if you're in the right.

19. In conclusion, they are always telling you that two plus two equals five. You are good at math so they can just fuck off.”

[highfivingyourself]

just some ideas from others, no judgement <3 you all

[highfivingyourself]

“One of the most common characteristics of abusers that I noticed when I worked with people with disabilities was the attitude that the client’s resistance to the abuse was itself thought of as justification for the abuse. Once that feedback loop is established, control is justified through both acquiescence and resistance, and there’s nothing the client can do (behavior wise) to escape. The same holds true for abusive relationships, prisons, police, or any other kind of authoritarian regime. The broader message is “Your resistance tomy behavior is the reason I behave this way in the first place.”

[highfivingyourself]

I have been gone a lot and I can’t really explain why, something about being here just felt like so much work to me and idk why but I’m needing self care a lot lately and I think we’re all really needing stuff to look forward to even if we’re dreading so much. So I’m about to go make myself an ice cream sundae and watch Insecure in bed. I’m gonna keep doing activism bc I have to there is no option for me, I can’t cope without it. And I’m looking forward to Christmas with a good friend even though I hate Christmas but she loves it and I love her and spending time with her. I hope you all are doing as well as can be with this scary situation. Sending you all lots of love <3 What are you doing for self care? What are you looking forward to? What are you high fiving yourself for?

[highfivingyourself]

Hey, everyone! I made an accessible captioning blog @captioning-action if you wouldn’t mind spreading the word so I can help as many people as possible, that’d be great!

[highfivingyourself]

Snackies for restricted diets!

Are you on a super restrictive diet? Snacks are SO HARD TO COME BY, right?

Well, we’ve got a few suggestions for you! These snacks are specifically SIBO-friendly, and SCD-, FODMAP-, gluten-free- and sometimes paleo-friendly by extension. 

Keep reading

[highfivingyourself]

I have bipolar mood disorder and I get worried that I’m too reliant on my medication especially if the dosage goes up

Then I realized

NEUROTYPICAL PEOPLE ARE JUST AS RELIANT on the neurochemicals in my medication, it’s just that their bodies produce it and mine doesn’t, it’s not that I’m a bad person and idk this realization seems to have really helped me understand and not feel so bad about it?

[highfivingyourself]

[image description: art of a pill bottle that says “take once a day”, a shampoo bottle, a tea cup with flowers filled with tea or coffee, a diary, and a pencil, with the words “You define what self care means to you” above them. It is signed IG-FRIZZKIDART]

You define what self care means to you 💚

[highfivingyourself]

I’m so proud and happy for you!!

[image description: Steven Universe running down a hill, jumping up and high fiving the mail carrier]

Also, y’all can send me your high fives every day of the week if you want <3 <3 <3

Happy High Five Yourself Friday <3 This week I’m high fiving myself for

- leaving the house by myself multiple times this week even though my anxiety was kicking my butt

- organizing the community potluck even when it seemed like all the plans were falling through

- eating dessert every day :)

[gif description: Mimi from Telenovela walking through the hallway and high fiving a robot]

what are you high fiving yourself for?

[highfivingyourself]

Sadly, lots of ppl, including many doctors. Especially for patients who are marginalized, women and/or POC, etc. They say we’re hysterical or think we should have a higher pain tolerance, or think we are making it up or that we’re ””“drug seekers”““ as if addicts can’t have chronic pain

Things I wish people had said to me:

It’s okay to take pain medication. It’s okay to complain. It’s okay to take something that will only help you for a couple months. It’s okay to be sad or angry. It’s okay to say ‘no’ to treatments you don’t want to do, or events when you don’t feel well. I believe you. Follow your instincts. It’s okay to be stand up for yourself to crappy doctors. Everyone is missing pieces, your not broken.

[highfivingyourself]

theamazingdalet:

getting some writing done!

high five!

[gif description: Jane from Jane the Virgin high fiving her friend in the park]

[highfivingyourself]

Things I wish people had said to me:

It’s okay to take pain medication. It’s okay to complain. It’s okay to take something that will only help you for a couple months. It’s okay to be sad or angry. It’s okay to say ‘no’ to treatments you don’t want to do, or events when you don’t feel well. I believe you. Follow your instincts. It’s okay to be stand up for yourself to crappy doctors. Everyone is missing pieces, your not broken.

[highfivingyourself]

If you feel that you are more than your illness, that’s okay

If your illness is what defines you, that’s okay

It’s not up to other people to decide what your illness means to you.

[highfivingyourself]

Happy High Five Yourself Friday <3 I’m proud of you all for every step you took to get here no matter how small it may seem. This week I’m high fiving myself for

- going to the lake with friends even though it’s scary for me to leave my house for very long and I wasn’t sure if I was gonna feel uncomfortable and miserable. I was at times but there were lots of times I wasn’t too.

- sticking to my budget

what are you high fiving yourselves for?