gothamdorkthoughts
Local Gothamite
24 posts
Just your average collage kid in Gotham making ends meet and shit-posting along the way
Last active 60 minutes ago
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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It was a genuine lifesaver. And I believe it worked great as a recruitment tactic. Whole loyalty since giving people things they need to survive for free and all.
Honestly it things get too rough, and I have to pick someone to go to, it’ll probably be him because of that.
Does anyone else remember when Penguin would go to crime alley and give food to the kids there? Or is that just something I recall because I relied on that heavily as a kid.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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The update everyone wasn’t waiting for.
I went; and it was lackluster at best. So back to normal civilian life for me.
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Memes about my scarecrow experience because what else can I do in this fucking economy.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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Does anyone else remember when Penguin would go to crime alley and give food to the kids there? Or is that just something I recall because I relied on that heavily as a kid.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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Does me meeting scarecrow, writing an essay on effective horror, and welding am existential horror stature worsen my argument? I feel like it’s definitely doing something to it.
Trying to prove I’m not a villain and then listing traits I have seems counterproductive should I ever get cornered about if I am one.
Like no! I’m not a villain. I’m just getting my major in law, and I have a personality disorder, and I’m mentally ill, and I’m disabled, and I have a high moral code, and I don’t think the current way of running things is working and that it needs to be changed by force if need be, BUT YOU NEED RO HEAR ME OUT MAN! I’m not a villain!
Like that conversation will not and absolutely cannot bode well for me.
I wonder if I’m on any lists yet.
But checking also seems like a bad idea. So that shall remain unknown.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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He put his business card on my door. And I figured well, can’t get worse. And his toxin didn’t work last time. So what’s the worst that will happen.
Fuck it.
I’m gonna go meet him. Wish me well.
And him is scarecrow for those who’s missed out on my latest run of desperation.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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Fuck it.
I’m gonna go meet him. Wish me well.
And him is scarecrow for those who’s missed out on my latest run of desperation.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 9 months ago
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See, you get it. Honestly, I might. It’s a long weekend from college this week. And it’s been stressful cause it’s mid semester. So you know.
Opportunities and all.
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Memes about my scarecrow experience because what else can I do in this fucking economy.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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If you look distressed enough in crime alley people leave you be.
(But unfortunately you might be followed by redhood)
Rating mental breakdown spots in Gotham
Gotham subways: 5/10. Can blast emo music through your headphones. Train occasionally stalls. Other passengers too burned out to notice you. 
Gotham U: 10/10. You're likely not the only one. School mascot hands out free tissues. 
Batburger: 8/10. Semi-public depending on seating. Tears make the fries soggy. Line cooks are wrestling in the background. 
Crime Alley: 0/10. People think you're drunk. You're a prime mugging target. Kids laugh at you.
Sewers: -2/10. Smells bad. 50% chance of Croc attack. 
Iceberg Lounge: 3/10. Judgy rich snobs. Bathroom full of people doing coke. Drinks too expensive to drown yourself in. 
Wayne Gala: 4/10. Also judgy rich people. Must dress formally. Can't stick your head in chocolate fountain. Dick Grayson will become your therapist whether you like it or not. 
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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I got a business card from Dr. Crane at my apartment one day last week.
Does that count?
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Memes about my scarecrow experience because what else can I do in this fucking economy.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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Memes about my scarecrow experience because what else can I do in this fucking economy.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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I’ll do the old stab and smother combo till they stop screaming just for you.
Some tips for new people that I have learned well living in Gotham.
1: If someone is dressed in any bright color (especially green or purple) I don’t care how safe you feel. Get away from them.
2: No you do not hear an explosion in the distance. Mind you business.
3: Any clown is bad. Trust me. No matter how nice they look. No clowns.
4: Please stop going out at night. You don’t know how it works here. Stay inside you fool.
5: PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP GOING TO CRIME ALLEY. THE NAME WASNT GIVEN CAUSE SOMEONE WAS IN A SILLY GOOFY MOOD. It’s called crime alley cause there a shit ton of CRIME!!!
6. Always and I mean always have a gas mask on you. Scarecrow and joker are very common breakouts.
7. Don’t go to coffee shops if the bat signal is on. There are rouges and bats in there already. We do not need more people crowding up the place.
Feel free to add more tips these are just some from the top of my head :)
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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As someone who lives in crime alley for the rent because haha broke.
Yeah. Tourists shoo.
I already have to worry about redhood thinking I’m gonna go all rogue gallery cause of a breakdown. I do not need to be pointed at as a ‘part of the Gotham experience’ because I will add to your “authentic Gothams experience” by stabbing you.
Some tips for new people that I have learned well living in Gotham.
1: If someone is dressed in any bright color (especially green or purple) I don’t care how safe you feel. Get away from them.
2: No you do not hear an explosion in the distance. Mind you business.
3: Any clown is bad. Trust me. No matter how nice they look. No clowns.
4: Please stop going out at night. You don’t know how it works here. Stay inside you fool.
5: PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP GOING TO CRIME ALLEY. THE NAME WASNT GIVEN CAUSE SOMEONE WAS IN A SILLY GOOFY MOOD. It’s called crime alley cause there a shit ton of CRIME!!!
6. Always and I mean always have a gas mask on you. Scarecrow and joker are very common breakouts.
7. Don’t go to coffee shops if the bat signal is on. There are rouges and bats in there already. We do not need more people crowding up the place.
Feel free to add more tips these are just some from the top of my head :)
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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Ah well. That’s fun.
Time to destroy any and all potential gimmick looking things so I don’t get drop kicked on my way to class.
Dear Redhood.
I know you just watched me collapse, scream in anguish and sorrow before standing up and continuing to work on my assignments.
I’m fine. Uh. Don’t call the bats or birds on me or whoever you’re working with.
It’s not a villain origin story. It’s just been a week. I know I’m in college. I promise it’s not for crime.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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Trying to prove I’m not a villain and then listing traits I have seems counterproductive should I ever get cornered about if I am one.
Like no! I’m not a villain. I’m just getting my major in law, and I have a personality disorder, and I’m mentally ill, and I’m disabled, and I have a high moral code, and I don’t think the current way of running things is working and that it needs to be changed by force if need be, BUT YOU NEED RO HEAR ME OUT MAN! I’m not a villain!
Like that conversation will not and absolutely cannot bode well for me.
I wonder if I’m on any lists yet.
But checking also seems like a bad idea. So that shall remain unknown.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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Pros of crime alley.
If I have a breakdown I won’t get a kick flip to the face by Robin or get the stern talking to from the Bats.
Rent is super cheap.
Screaming randomly doesn’t raise any alarms. Very cathartic.
Downsides of crime alley
Redhood might though.
And he might shoot or laugh at you mid breakdown. It’s a 50/50 chance dependent on his mood.
Screaming doesn’t raise any alarms
Dear Redhood.
I know you just watched me collapse, scream in anguish and sorrow before standing up and continuing to work on my assignments.
I’m fine. Uh. Don’t call the bats or birds on me or whoever you’re working with.
It’s not a villain origin story. It’s just been a week. I know I’m in college. I promise it’s not for crime.
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gothamdorkthoughts · 10 months ago
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Dear Redhood.
I know you just watched me collapse, scream in anguish and sorrow before standing up and continuing to work on my assignments.
I’m fine. Uh. Don’t call the bats or birds on me or whoever you’re working with.
It’s not a villain origin story. It’s just been a week. I know I’m in college. I promise it’s not for crime.
115 notes · View notes