gessynfectant

[gessynfectant]

growing up, she has always been the goody two shoes. way down and far, she knows exactly what to choose. growing wisely, maturity is reclusive and dreary; being a well-behaved matured child was the only choice. one way or the other, she is appalled at the constant battle of existential issues, believing that growing apart ...may heal all wounds.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2022

[gessynfectant]

“Accept how you feel but don’t let feelings rule you. You are in control. You are not their slave.”

— Unknown

[gessynfectant]

When I was in elementary, I used to carry a heavy school bag everyday. Only to realize that it was actually the lightest baggage in my life ... and I hope it remained that way.

[gessynfectant]

Dear self, (◔◡◔✿)

A Letter of Appreciation Date: March 20, 2022 6:54PM

It's been a while since you graduated from college as a scholar, an artist, and a small business owner on September 23, 2022. As I am writing this, I cannot help but simper at the thought that you were unapologetically brave for choosing what was right and beneficial for you and your future. You are indeed a rebel with a cause, aren't you? Who would have thought that you unexpectedly built your own little business and passion project during a pandemic? You did earn a lot from it and you supported yourself all along. There might be scars during the process but I think that is a recourse of self-growth and God's way of cleansing circles. Also, who would have thought that weeks after your graduation and business endeavors, you got your first job? I think my words cannot even fathom what I feel for you on embarking on a new and fast-paced season of your life. It is eminent that you are indeed excellent and capable in your own ways. I am celebrating with you.

First, thank you for believing in yourself and for being faithful during your struggles. Those were the times when your only supporter and giver was God, right? All the sleepless nights, silent prayers and cries, wearisome personal crises, and overwhelming responsibilities of "forced adulting" honed you to become the person that you are today. I just have to remind you that God was evident in your life during that trial, and I hope you won't forget that grace indeed carried you through. You felt that, didn't you? You heartfully felt that, girl. Second, I hope you made your parents proud because you are the first member of the family who actually completed a degree. I am pretty sure that despite the fact of carrying excess baggage, which is the burden that you carry, you came out stronger and fiercer. I couldn't imagine that you got your first job weeks after you graduated? If that is not the definition of "strong" and "brave" then I don't know what is. Third, I hope you are really proud of yourself because you are indeed a living testimony of God's grace. You managed to thrive and survive during a pandemic. I just want to remind you that in every season and even on the most mundane days, God is with you through it all. As much as you and the people around you are proud of your achievements, please keep in mind that God is the proudest of them all first. Lastly, I hope that as God allows you to grow and wander in the uncertainties of life in pursuit of your passion and purpose, may you always return to His goodness. Once you find yourself returning to His goodness, may you restore the faith and kindness in your "self".

With grace and grit, Gessy.

[gessynfectant]

Hey, little girl. Here you go, you’re crying again. What seems to be thy pain? You’re kissing your pillows with tears. I can see the vice of spilled anxiety and fears. I know.

Hey little girl. Here you go, you’re putting yourself off again. What seems to be thy pain? You’re isolating yourself from a paradisiac euphony. I thought you are already settled with your own epiphany. I know.

Hey little girl. You aren’t little anymore. You’re way more than just a girl. You’re beyond a scribble and twirl. You’re more than everything in between. You’re more than just a queen. You’re more than just an incomplete chapter in a book. You’re everything you ought to outlook. You are you. I know.

Hey little girl. I got one thing to spill. Come here. Come near. Hear me out as I whisper these things in your ears,

“You can make it because a gamechanger never quits. Don’t stress out too much onto something that is not happening yet because great things take time. You are still in progress, sweetheart. Fight. Believe. Conquer.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

She is always a girl in a hidden euphoria walking in barefoot with a sunflower in her hand until crippling anxiety creeps in; her sunflower wilts and slowly dies.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

I was supposed​ to put pain in the jar of thoughts where it belongs but sorry….

I spilled it off.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

1. Time does not heal. Time makes you forget and does a good job of making memories blurry. Take healing into your own hands - don’t wait for someone else to do it. 2. Do not waste your I love you’s. The more you flaunt the word around to people you’ve just met and early lovers, the less it will mean when love really hits. 3. Create a list of things you want to do in life. I’m not talking about going to see the northern lights or visiting Hawaii. The little things that can be easy to accomplish such as: trying caviar, painting your room, and trying that new sushi place. Checking off the little things in life is the best self-esteem boost. 4. Always take the high road. If you’re working with rude people or someone has done wrong to you, do not stoop to their level. What’s goes around will come back around. Trust me. 5. Offer to help. People appreciate someone that genuinely wants to give a helping hand whether it’s setting the table or carrying heavy boxes. 6. Stop being hard on yourself. Who cares if you did not get an A on that test? Does it matter if you embarrassed yourself at lunch the other day? Move on. We’re only human. 7. Read more. 8. Be open minded. People who can not see past their own opinions do not go anywhere in life. 9. Accept your flaws. 10. Invest in yourself. Buy yourself that new art set, or new shoes, or order some good take out. The little things in life are often over looked, but they add up in the best ways.

aberrantangst  (via wnq-writers)

[gessynfectant]

In this world of raging colors, You’re the monochrome —filled with desirables. You’re a shadow —hidden behind these finite clouds. A break after a dawn. A rendered phase on a work in progress pieces. You’re perfect. I’m fucked up. But still, I’ll hold your hands And fill these torn pages

…with your Mars Lumograph.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

// k a p a g i i y a k a k o ✨ //

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

my heart hurts so good.🌹

ilysb in Paul’s handwriting

[gessynfectant]

Fuel me up! 💛

melodrama | @lordemusic

[gessynfectant]

and that was the thing about her, she kept on surviving. with bullet holes in her lungs, and knife marks etched in her back. she never let anything get in her way, resilient. a fighter, not by choice. but a warrior at heart.

k. azizian (via wnq-writers)

[gessynfectant]

I live in the world of pigmented color —where my life is a big canvass and I am still a work in progress. Different hues and saturation of colors —are coaxes through hoops leaving a remark on my personality. I came from messy drafts and scratches —pushing me to become a great masterpiece myself. Therefore, I think I am an artist of my backlashed pieces.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017

[gessynfectant]

I’m not prepared for you to be in my past. I’m prepared for you to be my last.

Bruce Adler (via wnq-writers)

[gessynfectant]

I don't care how physically appealing you are, if your soul and heart isn't clean, you're unattractive to me.

[gessynfectant]

UNEXPECTED CONVERSATION

At first, I really don’t give much attention on how you kept on asking me questions– that are boggling my mind’s reaction and putting my flattered heart in a fast-paced circulation. Thinking it was just a normal conversation, I took all things with mere consideration. Your inspiring admiration just made my heart melt–well, better call it as a sudden “hibernation”. That time, we were in a closed-fight competition for the golden ticket in GP Annual Convention. I was left in awe when I saw your name in my notification And so, our conversation started there–t'was indeed a great decision. For I didn’t expect that you are now a part of my life’s illustration.

— G.D.A.B © gessynfectant 2017