foodlyhallows

[foodlyhallows]

‪Living in someone’s shadow

is the worst thing, I’ve experienced it and I still am in it. I’m trying to get out of here but I keep going back to square one. I just can’t do it. She’s my bestfriend. We look alike. People are always gonna find one of the two better, and I know it’s her. I love her. I don’t want it to be me either but for once I want to be the first choice.‬ I want to be the person who’s recognized for what they’ve done and not being compared to someone just because we look alike or because I’m not that smart. I hate it. I hate that I’m jealous. I hate that I’m crying rn, sitting in the same spot I balled my eyes out before. I’m trying to be ME, make friends as ME, but somehow they still like her more. When it’s about her talents, its her.But when it’s about my talents, it’s always her and me and not me. Because I’m known as the bestfriend, not as me.

I can’t talk about it to anyone irl because I don’t want to target her, I don’t want her to feel guilty of being the prettier one, the smarter one, the approachable one, the one who stands out.

I never wanted to feel this way, but I feel insecure, about how she’s better and I’m not. And that insecurity makes me want to stay away from people, because whenever I do something sweet for people with her, it’s only her getting the appreciation. Hell, I don’t talk to people because I know they’re gonna like her instead.

[foodlyhallows]

Why are you doing this? Those unsaid words, why are you looking at me but not at me? Why can’t we just stare into each other’s eyes like others, why can’t you talk to me make it obvious that you like me? So that I don’t think I’m dreaming of you looking at me before shooting that goal, you sitting near me when there are so many empty chairs, you standing beside me saying nothing. And you looking at me even though there are so many pretty girls out there. But isn’t this you? Isn’t this us? Isnt it what makes us special? And that’s what I tell myself everytime I hear people talking about their own love stories.

[foodlyhallows]

I feel bad for myself when I know I shouldn’t be but all my friends are happily in love. I’m jealous that their feelings are being returned. yet I can’t even be friends with you. And you don’t talk to me.And maybe it will be a miracle that we’ll ever be something, which will be a dream.

— my real life plus where no one decent has a crush on me

[foodlyhallows]

“I want to hear your voice again and again.”

- for the person I can’t stop thinking about

[foodlyhallows]

The day I realised you matter to me so much

I felt so distressed when I was getting late for our thing, which was so simple, just standing together , few feet apart without saying anything in those few minutes. I felt empty when that didn’t happen. It was only one day, but still, and I rushed to where you were, my mind at all places. I just wanted to see you. That day, after that and hearing you hum a song after me, made me realise how deep my feelings are for you. And I felt like crying because I’m fucked.

[foodlyhallows]

“How can you look like the most beautiful thing in the world just standing there and laughing?”

[foodlyhallows]

“And everytime our eyes meet, my heart skips a beat.”

—your smile has me feeling some kind of way

[foodlyhallows]

I thought I’ll get over you and you’ll get over me when I go away for those two weeks, but none of that happened. I can’t believe it’s real.

— my mind and feelings for you

[foodlyhallows]

I hate that I still like you

[foodlyhallows]

I have to let my frustration and angst out a little bit, so if any of my followers see this, don’t bother too much about this - but srsly WHAT IS WRONG WITH FANDOM - AND SHIPPING - CULTURE NOWADAYS??

I’m reading a webtoon right now (You should really install line webtoon, the stuff there is fucking good and you can support hard working artists by reading their amazing stories) and it made me realize that sth is wrong with us sometimes… I am reading I love Yoo at the moment - GO READ IT IT’S AMAZING- and when I read the top comments I realized sth…

SPOILER WARNING FOR THOSE WHO WANT TO READ IT OR ARE READING IT BUT HAVEN’T READ MUCH YET

First of all, the main character Yoo Shin-Ae meets two guys shortly after another, first Yeong-Gi aka Nol, and then his brother Kousuke and of course the shipping starts immediately - which is fine btw - and everything is fine and all but then shit get’s down and I KNOW these are fictional characters and I KNOW that you’re not supposed to take stuff like that so seriously but this made me REALLY upset bc when Kousuke wants to pick up Nol at some point, his mother comes along. And his mother is really excited about meeting Shin-Ae and she seems really supportive of her and she wants Kousuke and Shin-Ae to make out. And the three top comments focused on how pretty the woman was, how supportive she was and THEY. COMPLETELY. IGNORED. WHAT. HAPPENED. WHEN. NOL. SAW. HER. I only read the three top comments so I don’t really know about the others but the fact that most of them had over 50.000 likes shows, what the people were focused on. I didn’t like her at all because my precious little Nol was terrified when he laid his eyes on her. TERRIFIED. And I was wondering how these people could be like -Oh look how pretty she is, oh, our ship is sailing, oh, she wants our ship too, oh, I love her bc she supports our ship- WHEN THERE WAS A GUY STANDING THERE, TOO TERRIFIED TO SAY ANYTHING (again, I know it is fictional but still??) And it didn’t stop there - this horrible woman got manipulative and rude, putting pressure on Shin-Ae, making her feel OBVIOUSLY uncomfortable and she STILL got praised for being supportive of the ship - I thought I was seeing things, I mean is that ALL you can think of?? As the story continues it becomes VERY CLEAR that Nol’s family treats him like shit, over and over again - and almost no one seemed to care. The only important thing was that Kouske treated Shin-Ae well, and that she seems to have a crush on him and so on and so on - don’t get me wrong, of course you can be excited about how your ship is doing but how can you ignore other things like that?? I don’t know any of those in person who wrote these comments and I don’t want to insult any of them but it actually does make me uneasy. How do you react in real life then when you see sth like this?? If you were with your friends and you see someone you think is nice, but one of your friends is obviously afraid?? Are you going to ignore the suffering of a person for the sake of a relationship??

The more I was reading the better it got, more people got worried, more people started to just wish for happiness for the characters but still… I see a person completely broken inside - and Nol IS broken inside, it get’s very clear the moment he sees that shitty woman - and I get worried, while most of the others just fantasize about their ship - That doesn’t feel right at all… And AGAIN it is fictional, but goddamn that hit me really hard. It made me think about how one single little detail can cloud your whole vision.

There are still more things I want to add, but I am on my phone and my thumbs hurt, so I think I’ll edit this later

[foodlyhallows]

`ੈ🔭‧₊ I LOVE YOO -“.. EPISODE 85 .

— Icons (?)

— Like/reblog if you like/use it ♡

[foodlyhallows]

i love yoo: dieter icons!

[foodlyhallows]

“What’s a soulmate?” [I Love Yoo fancomic based on Dawson’s Creek soulmate speech. Some of the panels are just redraws of the original ones by Quimchee uwu] Hope you enjoy reading this short fancomic of I Love Yoo 💕

[foodlyhallows]

[foodlyhallows]

i want your

attention.

don’t look away from me, dear..

[foodlyhallows]

some days i think it’s better that you don’t know how much i actually like you but on other days i wanna look you dead in the eye and tell you about every little thing that made me think of you

[foodlyhallows]

“It’s just that I don’t want to be somebody’s crush. If somebody likes me, I want them to like the real me, not what they think I am. And I don’t want them to carry it around inside. I want them to show me, so I can feel it too.”

— Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower