flamingsw0rd

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Fat pussy friday waddever, when's big areola friday now thats something i'm at the edge of my seat for

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she jack off my trades till im master of none

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my mans running animation only got two frames

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Every time a small child starts crying or having a tantrum in my vicinity and I catch the parents glancing at me I’ve started saying “me when…”.

Friend kept trying to tell his crying kindergartener to calm down and relax and the kid growled “I AM relaxed” while visibly tensing every muscle in his body and I was like “oh that’s me at work every day” and we had a chuckle.

Parents look to other adults like “shit are they mad? Do they think my kid is acting like a demon?” And this response is my attempt to say “no. I think your kid is just acting like a human being.”

I WISH I could fling myself on the ground and cry because I experienced a minor inconvenience.

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ok

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Dan Beckemeyer - Systems (2009) - Illustrated skeletal system and hand-felted muscle mass on abaca paper

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guy who thinks food was significantly harder to chew 17 years ago

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spotify is raising prices again here's the apk that gives you premium for free

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white boy goes to Jupiter and shocks waiters by ordering in perfect Stupider

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some one just put a cup over me and they’re looking for a paper to slide under me LOL gonna break out from this cup while they’re distracted

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Looking out the window and seeing a little bird can honestly be so life changing

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imagine if you teleported to a big multiversal hub of every version of you from every parallel universe and like 99.99% were just minor variations of some weird beetle alien and it turned out being a human made you one of the zany gimmick versions