feralkitten13 - Tumblr blog

[feralkitten13]

Reflecting on heartbreak and love lost today. I wasn’t diagnosed with my mental issues until I was in my thirties and I can’t help but wish I would have been diagnosed much sooner. I made so many bad decisions and choices on account of manic, bi polar, and psychotic episodes through my teens, twenties, and early thirties. A lifetime of pain and needless suffering. A lifetime of learning. I went through long periods of extreme hyper sexual activity and erratic behavior. I broke hearts in the process, including my own. Repeatedly. I don’t talk about this enough but now that my symptoms are in control it hurts so bad to see a broken lifetime of poor choices. Yet without those choices I wouldn’t be who I am today and where I am today. I’m just….feeling my emotions and letting them roll over me. It’s okay to feel pain sometimes and just sit with it. I could take my Adavan and numb that pain but I would rather sit with it today and contemplate it’s existence. I’m not who I was before I got help. Yet I am. I am of a sound state of mind and can see so clearly how, excuse my language, but fucking crazy I was. Now that I’m here I can move forward and cope with my ghosts and demons from here forward. I have a future in front of me. I just have to keep moving forward❤️‍🩹

[feralkitten13]

My anxiety has been through the roof this week. It comes in waves. I miss living in the city and I’ve been really missing my family and friends up north. I miss the humm of the city…the chaos…the noise. I’m thankful for everything I have here, I’m just lonely….It’s overwhelming sometimes but that’s why I have my meds. Thank the goddess for my Ativan and Olanzapine. They keep me stable, even when I’m trying to fall apart❤️‍🩹

[feralkitten13]

Who’s afraid of the big, bad, wolf?

A couple of months ago I saw a red riding hood coat for sale and it was waaaay over my price range and I was so bummed. I literally scoured the net looking for an affordable red pea coat and came up empty handed. Fast forward to the now and I was at a thrift store and lo and behold, I found a bright, wool, red riding hood style pea coat in my exact size for under five dollars. It’s vintage and it fits like a glove. I love thrifting and I love my red coat❤️‍🔥 #thrifting #thriftstorefinds #thriftfinds #thrifted #budget #blonde #blondehair #longblondehair #redridinghood #alternative #alternativegirl #alternativefashion #alternativestyle #makeup #makeupoftheday #mua #makeuplook

[feralkitten13]

Part of my recovery process has been gaining confidence in how I look and how I feel. I have body dysmorphia, along with schizoaffective bi polar, anxiety, psychosis and ptsd. I used to pick myself apart so badly and I always felt ugly, no matter what I did or what my weight was. I never felt good enough. I never, ever felt pretty. Now I have genuine confidence. I love the way I look for the first time in my life, and I feel pretty. It’s been a long road to get to where I am today. I love changing my look up and playing with makeup, hair, and contact lenses. Today I received my @ttd_eye colored lenses in Himalaya Grey and I love them. 10/10 would recommend this brand. I love my natural eye color but it is so fun to change it up and play. I don’t care if people think makeup is dumb or think women shouldn’t wear makeup and do their hair. I wear makeup and do my hair because it gives me confidence and I don’t give two fucks if someone thinks I should change myself to make them feel more comfortable. If you like makeup, wear it proudly. If you don’t like makeup that’s okay too, don’t wear makeup, but don’t be a downer on someone that does. I live around a bunch of crunchy men and women who constantly judge me for not being “au naturel”. I’m not going to feed the hate, I’m just going to be myself and keep feeling fabulous. Yea, I dye my hair. Yea, I wear a ton of makeup. Yea, I dress up for nothing. And I’m happy. That’s all, I had to vent because it seems like the world will tear a womyn down when she feels confident and beautiful and I’m not here for it. Do what makes you happy, and be yourself unapologetically. Period.

#makeupoftheday #makeup #makeupartist #makeuplover #makeuplook #pink #pinkhair #pastelpinkhair #alternative #alternativegirl #alternativestyle #piercing #pierced #blondehair #ttdeye #ttdeyeofficial #beauty #confidence #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #selfcare #schizoaffective #schizoaffectivebipolar #bipolar #ptsd #recovery #recoveryispossible #mentalhealthadvocate #stigmafree

[feralkitten13]

Hello! My name is Rose and this is my first blog post here and I’m so excited. I am diagnosed with schizoaffective bi polar disorder, anxiety, psychosis, extreme Hyperhidrosis, and PTSD. I am in recovery and I’m doing really, really well. This blog is just a place for me to share my stories and experiences about my life in recovery. I’m happy to be here💗🌙✨🕯

#mentalhealth #mentalhealthadvocate #bipolar #schizoaffective #ptsd #anxiety #hyperhidrosis #recovery #blog #mentalhealthblog #mentalhealthawareness #stigmafree #pinkhair #pastelhair