extemporary-username

[extemporary-username]

"Gargle My Balls"

ICE agents attempt to check passengers’ immigration status.

Seattle bus driver tells them to ‘gargle my balls.’

Greyhound corporate and multiple other major transportation companies surprisingly respond, ‘Yeah. We’re okay with that.’ 🤩

[extemporary-username]

I do actually care marginally about the guy in that reddit screenshot who voted for Trump and is now worried that he might lose his medicaid funding because I did not fucking stutter when I said healthcare is a human right but the people losing their internships and job offers to the hiring freeze are straight up hilarious.

[extemporary-username]

"The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I'm not a trannie or a fag so I don't care, just give 'em the medicine they need."

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

[extemporary-username]

my phone isn’t charging even though i plugged her innnnn dramatic ass bitch. YOUR PUSSY IS FILLED! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT

[extemporary-username]

Huge thanks to Richard of the Order of the Blade for throwing me around!

(If you’re in the UK, consider checking them out! The order are a combat school with a really fun and welcoming ethos)

And as always, more bows, swords, and nonesense on Patreon

[extemporary-username]

Huge thanks to Richard of the Order of the Blade for throwing me around!

(If you’re in the UK, consider checking them out! The order are a combat school with a really fun and welcoming ethos)

And as always, more bows, swords, and nonesense on Patreon

[extemporary-username]

while they share a similar base flavor, dick tastes more umami while pussy tastes more acidic, though recent menstruation conveys an overwhelming metallic flavor that some diners object to (though i am not one of them). recommended wine pairings are

[extemporary-username]

[extemporary-username]

went to my best friend’s house last night and saw a little plushie dog and plushie cat that had been sewn together down the middle into a two-headed chimera. I said, “did you do that?” she said, “yes, I saved them.”

turns out at her old job when the last two plushies hadn’t sold and became deadstock, her boss told her to cut them up and throw them out. so she cut them each in half, preserved their heads, and then rebuilt them together.

cannot stop thinking about the way these little plushies were approached with the instinct of a Vampire or some sort of ancient god. “Let me save you [turn you into a monster].”

[extemporary-username]

2319 feels like a reference. Is it another experiment like 626?

It's a reference to Monster Inc, but you are right 626 is Stitch from Lilo and Stitch. :)

[extemporary-username]

reblog to meow at prev insistently

[extemporary-username]

I feel cheated. no one on Reddit told me that tumblr is a serotonin factory. Keep liking and reblogging my posts please thanks

[extemporary-username]

Bleakly realistic US politics question.

I was chatting with my sister who has a masters in History, American. She and I agree that there will almost certainly be a constitutional crisis sometime in the next few years, and we were discussing what happens then.

If you aren’t familiar; a constitutional crisis would be something where following that law/ruling/order/decision would fundamentally break the compact of the states. Eg. If the courts decide that, ‘actually, it’s cool, a president can undo amendments with a pen stroke’ that’s a constitutional crisis. Anything that breaks the agreement between the states to be 50 countries in a trench coat.

So now. Options. Non-Americans, your vote is welcome.

[extemporary-username]

Someone on Facebook said that this was the Aikido version of “POCKET SAND!” and they’re absolutely right