elderlyrabbi

[elderlyrabbi]

I don't care what Gordon Ramsay says I can't eat rare and medium-rare meat. Its just really gross to me and doesnt particularly taste better either. I need the confirmation that my food is cooked safely that medium-well and welldone provides. Im not particulary a fan of the juices either.

[elderlyrabbi]

"Don't pull up to me with that 'glasses' bullshit, I want a girl who can see!" - jake from statefarm.

[elderlyrabbi]

Ringo Star does not exist.

[elderlyrabbi]

Watch regalelily on Twitch! They are super talented and need more views. http://www.twitch.tv/regalelily?sr=a

[elderlyrabbi]

Guys I am so sorry pt 2: look I make up some weird stuff on this blog, but lester is not a criminal investor, he is leyroys friend and a law abiding citizen who invests money back into his own community and helps even the youngest in the community to thrive economically.

[elderlyrabbi]

"LALA! Dipsy got his dick stuck in noo-noo!"

"For Christ's sake who thought it was a good idea to let someone named 'naughty noo-noo' live with us!"

"I mean he does a good job of cleaning."

"Yeah! Cleaning up dipsy's cock! This is the third time this month it's gotten stuck!"

"Not the third time its gotten sucked."

"Okay po, we gitta call tinky winky, I know hes retired but we need to have an intervention!"

"La La I don't know, after their fight I dont think tinky winky wants anything to do with us anymore."

"He's our only chance! I mean jesus, we can't keep excluding him. The only reason we didnt take his side was because of the bribe, Dipsy promised hed change and he hasn't, Tinky Winky was right."

"He always is"

"We gotta appologize to him, He's the only person who can save Dipsy."

"Dipsy isn't worth saving."

-The tellytubby girls create a battleplan after the "incident."

[elderlyrabbi]

"Totinos pizza rolls, I eat them 5 times a day." - definately elmo and not tim heidecker.

[elderlyrabbi]

"The body is beginning to smell! Help me drag thing 2 out back! Thing 1 burn the evidence." - the cat in the hat covering up the accidental slaughter of his servant and best friend thing 2 during an extreme accident that took place while traumatizing kids during a breaking and entering scheme.

[elderlyrabbi]

"The bourgeoisie doesn't exist. It never has." - Ernie says as the pidgeon drones controlled by the upper class begin to tear out his eyes.

[elderlyrabbi]

"Percy I told you not to talk to those bimbos!"

"I can't help it Thomas I have an addiction!"

"Well if we survive this mess you better pray to god your 'addiction' goes away lickity split 'cuz I'm gonna tear you in half!"

-Thomas and percy outrunning Diesel after Percy got "friendly" with a few troublesome trucks.

[elderlyrabbi]

"Give up on your hopes and dreams Thomas." - literally every one of the sides.

[elderlyrabbi]

Too old.

Hillary Clinton on tinder looking to match with teenagers.

[elderlyrabbi]

I don't know about that one chief.

Mommy when I ask for more iced creams.

[elderlyrabbi]

"Where the hoes at?" -Obama.

[elderlyrabbi]

Looking to follow some sweet foreign bots, what are my best options?

[elderlyrabbi]

Yo who else a member of the 10 posts club?

[elderlyrabbi]

I honestly want tumblr to send me an email congratulating me every 5 posts. The congratulations for the first 5 and 10 were just so splendid that my heart felt empty after not receiving more. My dopamine levels were so high knowing that It was worth telling me how many posts I had made even though I was easily capable of counting them.