duke-lightofmylife-thomas

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

batlantern where clark was too late. sorry clark.

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Dec 4: Remember that time we learned Clark Kent totally peeked at all his Christmas presents with his X-Ray vision? (Justice League, “Comfort and Joy”)

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

I have been thinking lately about a universe where Bruce Wayne killed the Joker.

I want to be clear here, since there are so many longstanding debates on this topic: I do not think Bruce Wayne should kill the Joker. I have just been wondering what would happen if the circumstances aligned in such a way that he did.

And to be clear on a related, yet slightly different topic: when I say I have been wondering about what if Bruce Wayne killed the Joker, I do not mean as the Batman. I mean Bruce "Brucie" Wayne.

Maybe it's kind of an accident? Like, he definitely did intend to hit the Joker, but he's Brucie right now, so he's trying not to look like he knows what he's doing while still doing enough damage to keep the Joker from killing someone, and meanwhile the Joker makes just the wrong move and -

And here we are. Brucie just killed the Joker.

Bruce's reaction here is one thing; he has his one rule for a reason, he's just broken it, he's determined to turn himself in -

His family's reaction is a whole different story. How does Cass feel about this?

How does Jason? Bruce has killed the Joker, just like he wanted, but it wasn't for him, not really, and -

And meanwhile, this happens in front of, say, a gala full of people, so now all of Gotham gets to react to it too.

Average Gothamite, seeing the words BRUCE WAYNE, JOKER, and KILLED in the same headline: OH, NO.

Average Gothamite, once they've processed the order those words are actually in: . . . I did not have that on this year's bingo card.

The city's most famous mass murderer has just been publicly killed by the city's biggest employer/philanthropist/source of tabloid harmless nonsense! Three days before Brucie was making tabloid headlines by tripping into a fountain and somehow losing his shirt in the process! Two weeks before, the newspaper was running a retrospective on the Wayne murders and what donation Brucie was making to help the families of victims this year! The article mentioned how one of his adopted sons had also tragically become a murder victim!

Now this has happened, and Bruce is having a breakdown over breaking his one rule, and the rest of Gotham just assumes that this is because poor Brucie thinks this somehow makes him like the man who killed his parents. They send a huge outpouring of support his way. This in no way helps Bruce's actual breakdown.

Ninety percent of Gotham is sure Brucie didn't actually mean to kill the Joker, and pretty much a hundred percent of them support him whether he meant to do it or not. No one wants to have anything to do with prosecuting this mess. Bruce is trying to make it as clear as possible that he will fully cooperate with the justice system and meanwhile an entire gala full of people is suddenly acting like they could in no way have possibly witnessed events that took place ten feet in front of their faces. Did Bruce kill the Joker? Is the officer sure? That doesn't seem like him. Maybe the Joker just tripped on his own. Marble floors, you know. Very slippery.

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

jason todd being a crier is important to me somewhere fundamental right up between my heart and my lungs.

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

David Corenswet as Superman/Clark Kent

Superman (2025) dir. James Gunn

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

I know y'all are not ready for it, but I'm this close 🤏 to hc Bruce having an eating disorder because of how strict Alfred is written about food in canon and fanon. Everyone is writing it as if it's a funny joke that the Batfam has to hide "unhealthy" snacks from him, but it's not. (Btw, just the "healthy" and "unhealthy" label are wrong and bad. Food is food.)

In the comics, Bruce will be offered a donut and think about how Alfred would disapprove and how it will harm his health, before accepting. And, sure, to live the life he lives, Bruce need to follow a particular diet. But it's just ONE donut, it cannot harm him. That's not a healthy mindset at all. The fact that Bruce, as a grown adult with kids, is thinking about Alfred's reaction to him eating a donut before accepting, vocalizing how it is against the rules, is alarming.

And maybe I would accept it, as a non-usamerican, if it was because of the toxic things they put in your food there (criminal what they make you eat), but it's never about that. No, it's about the calories and the heartburn, and "fast food and sugar" are bad, and "poor people food is bad" (Alfred's classicism is another point for another time). Alfred controls what the Wayne eat and he is very controlling about that, as the boys will also comment about Alfred disapproving something before eating it. This is some ED behavior, you shouldn't worry about food like this. And like, I'm split between being thankful neither Bruce or the kids enforce it to one another, but also being annoyed they need to remind others how "Alfred wouldn't approve" when they see them eating something not allowed.

Thinking about Dick and his cereals, especially that Nightwing (2016) page where he gets a Nightwing truck and it has a compartiment with a ton of cereals. It is a commun behavior in children who were restricted some type of food to over indulge in it once they are independent. If cereals were something Alfred was against because he finds it "unhealthy", Dick's extreme love for cereals is a red flag.

Me, talking about Bruce: The boy was mentally fucked up enough, you didn't have to give him an ED on top, Alfred!

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

we need to have a term for when dc comics introduces a morally ambiguous/complex (or even heroic) woc and she gets turned into an irredeemably evil moustache twirling parody of herself. (Bonus round: already villainous woc loses any humanising or positive traits to become a irredeemable monster without any nuance)

examples

Amanda Waller

Talia al Ghul

Lady Shiva

Cassandra Cain (attempted)

Rose Wilson

Bonus round: Cheshire ( she was always evil but they took away her most humanising trait, her love for Lian, and made her only value her children as replaceable possessions)

this can be contrasted to the treatment of white woman villains who tend to become more anti heroic/heroic over time and are given more positive traits. (E.g. catwoman (I know she’s now Latina but dc seemingly forgot and it became canon after her redemption), Harley Quinn, poison ivy, etc).

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Leaving the Suit Behind? You Are Invited to Fill Out the Robin Exit Interview

OPEN

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

In Bruce’s defense, anyone who blames him for putting his children in the line of fire does not like…get his children.

Bruce adopting and training these kids is absolutely the only thing standing between them and even EARLIER deaths than the ones in canon that they all basically just…refuse to let stick.

Like, these are six incredibly determined little dumbasses.

Dick Grayson: breaks out of juvie and runs around rooftops tracking down the mob boss that ordered his parents killed in order to ruthlessly avenge them when he’s EIGHT.

Jason Todd: at age twelve, is caught stealing the tires off the goddamn BATMOBILE and upon being caught, his first instinct is NOT flight, its HIT THE GODDAMN BATMAN WITH HIS TIRE IRON.

Tim Drake: as early as age ten, spends his free time running around Gotham’s rooftops and back alleys stalking Batman and Robin with his clunky camera and absolutely no prior experience or training in either acrobatics or surviving Gotham’s back alleys.

Cassandra Cain: Upon learning Lady Shiva is her mother, ignores Batman yelling CASSANDRA NO and tracks down the most lethal and feared woman on the planet and bullies her into training her further, with Shiva going okay but then we gotta battle to the death and Cassandra going sure, makes sense, when do we start.

Damian Wayne: Early in life, is ordered to hunt and fight a bunch of dragon-type creatures. Adopts one as his pet. Finally meets his father, who does not trust him. Steals the Batmobile. Is fired from Robin and forbidden to leave the Manor for his protection while there’s a hit on his life. Calls himself Redbird and resumes Robin duties, citing that he was only forbidden from leaving as ROBIN, specifically. Is sent home during an attack on the city by a zombie army. Turns around and wades into the zombie army on his own. Etc, etc.

Duke Thomas: At age ten, the Riddler shuts down all the power in Gotham and says he’ll only restore it if bested with a riddle. Duke hears this and decides, this is a job for…Duke Thomas. Around age fifteen, he’s put in the foster system after his parents are affected by the Joker’s mind-altering gas during an attack, hears that some of the Joker’s victims have been found wandering around the sewer system that’s noted for being home to like….a cannibalistic crocodile villain, among other things, thinks well, guess I gotta go personally cover every inch of Gotham’s sewers on my own, by foot. Accidentally stumbles across a plot to bomb all of Gotham and decides, this is a job for…Duke Thomas. Etc, etc.

In summation, the Batkids’ shared family trait is Absolute Dumbassery and a Willful Disregard for Self-Preservation, and no, they do not accept constructive criticism. Bruce’s training them all as his partners was 40% fatalism, 60% Hail Mary. 

He actually tried getting Dick to choose colors for his costume that would actually blend into the shadows, and eight year old Dick went nah, I’m gonna stick with bright red, yellow and green, thanks though. 

He actually tried teaching Jason Todd how to prioritize speed and evasion against bigger opponents, and 5���4″ Jason Todd went nah, I’m just gonna punch ‘em, thanks though. 

He actually tried sending Tim home when Tim first showed up, and Tim went nah, I’m just not gonna do that, thanks though. 

He actually tried getting Cassandra to be more careful and selective about inserting herself into every single dangerous situation she came across, and Cass went, sorry, lost my phone when I weaponized it against the bad guys and also I’m in Hong Kong right now about to face off with my killer mom, see ya when I get back, bye. 

He actually tried benching Damian repeatedly, and Damian went, LOL. No. 

He actually tried stressing to Duke the importance of leaving dangerous situations to the professionals, and Duke kept showing up at every dangerous situation in Gotham and being like oh hey, so weird we keep running into each other. 

Every time another adult hero clucks at Bruce disapprovingly and says he really should’ve kept his kids out of the hero life, Bruce’s eye twitches and he grinds out: “Oh gee. If only I’d thought of that.”

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

I ??? woke up at 3am with this scene fully written in my mind palace and quickly jotted it down in the Notes app

*

Clark’s shaking his head before he realizes he’s doing it, and feels a twinge of embarrassment at his own bad manners when Bruce stops mid-word to look at him, brows raised.

“No?” he says.

“No,” Clark says, again without thinking, and again with the reflexive urge to apologize. Somewhere his mother is tutting without knowing why. But he doesn’t apologize, because he’s already saying, “No, it can’t—it can’t be that.”

“Okay,” Bruce says slowly. “Can you elaborate?”

He is, honestly, having trouble taking his eyes off the screen. The mockup design of his new suit is there, dark and sleek, ridged like tactical gear. The blue is like the last shade of evening before you can’t call it evening anymore, the color of nine PM in Kansas in July, so exact there’s a strong chance Bruce color-picked it from a photo. The yellow accents are the cool fluorescent yellow-green of lightning bugs. The red is dark as arterial blood. Every aspect of the suit has been updated—the colors deeper, the angles sharper, the S extending to the corners of its frame—but Bruce has done it without changing the fundamentals. It’s immediately recognizable as the Superman suit, just… well, a little cooler, maybe. A little more of the times. Even the tailoring is modernized. The neckline. The shape of the boots. Where the belt hits at the waist. Clark can tell just by looking that Bruce has not only spent a lot of time on this in general, he’s spent a lot of time designing it specifically with Clark in mind, Clark’s needs and preferences and the small discomforts of his current suit, things he might have mentioned offhand after a mission but never with the assumption that Bruce was listening or filing it away. No doubt the next slides of this presentation will detail all the hidden features of the new suit, and they’ll all be incredibly thoughtful if not slightly overkill, and Bruce will pretend his sole motive here was practicality and risk reduction and respond to any thanks with a curt nod.

And Clark wants to thank him. He will. It’s just.

“It can’t be… cool,” he says, inane. Bruce is watching him with that steady look that used to feel clinical, piercing, and now mostly reads as attentive. “It can’t be—like yours. Tactical, military-grade.”

“Lightyears beyond, actually.”

“It has to—Ma said once, a kid should be able to draw it with crayons. You know? I can’t look like a weapon. I have to—I want to look like a friend.”

He can feel himself flushing. It’s rare that he speaks like this, and rarer still that he does so while being stared at intently. Bruce may think of himself as the darkness, but his gaze is a spotlight: unwavering and revealing and more a little sweat-inducing, for one reason or another.

“Sometimes, when I show up, people laugh,” Clark says. “If it’s somewhere out of the way, where they haven’t seen me before. I show up and I look like a festival performer. It’ll be the worst day of their lives, and they’ve got no reason to trust my face, but when they see what I’m wearing—it goes from ‘Who are you?’ to ‘Who is this guy?’ And that’s a good thing.”

“Hard to be afraid of a man dressed in primary colors,” Bruce says, almost to himself.

“Exactly.”

“I see. Thank you,” he says, “for explaining.”

Clark tries not to show how surprised he is to hear that. Judging by the crook of Bruce’s mouth, his success is negligible. “Of course. Sorry I didn’t—I mean, thank you, obviously, for going to such trouble. I didn’t mean to come in here and—I really do appreciate it, I can tell you put a lot of work in��”

Bruce’s eyes cut away. “No. No need. I didn’t ask, before I…. It was only a first draft. If you’re amenable, I’ll incorporate your feedback into the second one.”

“Oh! Yeah. Yes, of course, but you really don’t have to—”

“If you have any further notes, I would like to hear them.”

There’s something determined in the lines of his face. Clark has the sense that this moment is important, that it’s a turning point, even if he’s not sure why. It feels like striking out into a sea of ice, a blank white expanse under which something precious and vital is hidden, has been hidden all along, just waiting for him to find it. To want to.

“Sure,” he says. He looks back at the suit and swallows, and knows Bruce will see the flicker of his throat and take some meaning from it, and wishes he knew what the meaning was. Or maybe Bruce won’t notice or read into it at all. Maybe Clark needs to calm down, in fact. “Um. I don’t want to assume, but does it… do things?”

“It does things,” Bruce confirms, after the barest pause. “Let me show you the next slide.”

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Can someone pls give me like a comprehensive characterization of all the characters in the batfam??? I’m trying to write fics on them and I SO DO NOT want to mischaracterize them. Like how Jason was not the angry robin, but in fact the sweetest and only 4 apples tall Robin, while Dick “Crashout” Grayson was out here raging on every criminal. Things like that would help give depth to the characters Any additional lore as well would be good, as I’ve only been consuming batfam content through tumbler, fics, and other mishmash from social media. I’ve yet to start the comics and no ideas on where to start so any help there would be GREATLY APPRECIATED!!

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Batman is great with kids. He's kind, he's gentle, he's patient. But never towards his own.

A tragedy of Bruce being a parent, stopping seeing his kids as kids.

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

top 10 best hand-to-hand fighters in the DCU??

just wanna know ur opinions on this, it's really interesting to see the diff answers ppl give!

There's probably like hundreds and hundreds of characters I'm forgetting or are gaps in my knowledge because this is DC. Also not including Karate Kid because he's around centuries in the future and also that's basically cheating. -Cassandra Cain, (the only person alive who can somewhat consistently beat Shiva when they're both at their best. Name any martial artist in the DC universe and the odds are she's humiliated them. Like half of the shit she does in every single issue is flagrantly physically/biologically/logistically impossible) -Lady Shiva & Richard Dragon (it's established the two meet up to duel constantly and as of yet neither has definitively proven themselves superior so they share a spot) -White Canary (according to Dinah she's as good as if not better than Cass or Shiva but she does also back down from Shiva like a total wuss so that's probably a slight exaggeration, nonetheless she certainly proves herself to be in the same ballpark) -Strix (Shiva calls her one of the most impressive fighters she's ever seen and shall we say everything we see her do certainly backs up that assessment. Plus she has the same acrobat training as Nightwing) -Conner Hawke (He's basically only ever lost a fair fight to one of the above. He fought Shiva and gave almost as good as he got and even Cass concedes he's pretty good and if you know her she does not compliment lightly) -Bronze Tiger (can handily kick Batman's ass as well as basically everyone else in his league like Deathstroke, Black Canary, Catman etc, can at least hold his ground against the likes of the top 3) -Nightwing (he's usually held to be better than Bats and he's handled Deathstroke with relative ease a couple of times. Not to mention his absurd talent at acrobatics. I'd put him at the top of the A tier) -Deathstroke (we're really splitting hairs at this point but yeah, generally Slade's pretty much considered unstoppable by most people. There's a good reason the Bats' standard procedure when going up against him is to just pay him off) -Black Canary (really this spot could have gone to Batman or David Cain just as easily but in addition to being as good as those two Dinah has the best track record when it comes to being the underdog and winning through sheer grit and adaptability. I'd put my money on her scoring a surprise win against any of the heavy hitters on this list over those two)

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Why Duke Thomas Should Be A Dick Grayson Hater

Dick and Duke is such an underrated and underexplored relationship. Here is my pitch for why Duke should be a Dick Grayson hater.

1. The Rooftop Thing

Reason number one and the start of Duke's grudge should be the rooftop incident in Robin War. Dick, as part of his plan or whatever, leads Duke to a roof and abandons him to the cops.

LOOK AT DICK'S SMUG FACE. Tell me you wouldn't hold a grudge too if this was the FIRST major interaction you had with him?? Duke should use this against him at any possible opportunity.

2. ACAB

From We Are Robin #2. Once Duke finds out Dick used to be a cop, it's OVER for him.

3. Jason and Damian

Duke is quite close with Jason and Damian (in my head, particularly Damian - that's his LITTLE BROTHER). Anyway, these two are obsessed with Dick. You have Jason, with his miles-long brother issues that puts Dick on a pedestal, and you have Damian, who thinks Dick is the best person on Earth who can do no wrong. They would talk Duke's ears off about him. Duke would HATE IT.

4. Robin

This panel from Night of the Monster Men sums up quite nicely the difference in the way Dick and Duke approach vigilantism. Duke is the 'idealised' Robin, whose Robin-ing isn't contingent on Batman; Dick is more or less too tied up in Bruce. I think, because the Robin identity means a lot to Duke, having the original Robin be like this would irk Duke a LOT.

5. Tom Taylor

SPOILERS FOR CURRENT NIGHTWING RUN: in Nightwing #116, Dick gets framed for murder and Babs tells him to reveal he's Nightwing to clear him of suspicion. She says Bruce suggested it, and recounts everyone who agreed:

Hm. Is someone missing here? Oh yeah: DUKE. TT probably just forgot Duke, but where's the fun in that? Instead, if Duke is a Dick Grayson hater, you have the funniest scene imaginable. Everyone gathered in the Batcave, laying down their identities for Dick, and Duke is like 'I don't give a damn. He can rot in jail.' and peaces out.

BONUS points if he does this to get back at Dick for reason number 1.

6. Parallels

Duke's origin deliberately mirrors Bruce's, but that means it mirrors Dick's as well. Duke and Dick parallels go insane: they both had loving families, lost both parents at once, were in the foster system (varyingly for Dick but for the purposes of this post I'm gonna include it), were wards/not adopted by Bruce initially, have a huge reverence for family, have a thing about heights, view Robin as separate from Batman, forged their own identities, etc.

Tell me this page doesn't slap:

Anyway Duke would HATE this too. He'd be so annoyed that the person he has the most in common with is Dick, and that would fuel his Dick Grayson haterism.

Dick, on the other hand, has no hard feelings towards Duke. Duke would be glowering at him from the corner of the room and Dick would meet his gaze and be like 'ah Duke is so cute' and smile back. This would make Duke 10000x angrier.

Anyway that's my ideal Dick and Duke dynamic, feel free to add or modify or disagree with anything!!

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

Poster Jason whips out anytime he's forced to interact with the Batfam.

[duke-lightofmylife-thomas]

So this is why people think Duke is the best behaved one.