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merlin saying “the years before i came here were the loneliest of my life”

he doesn’t know yet that the years after are going to redefine loneliness for him

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Friends, I miss Merlin so much already😞😞😞 Arthur’s “thank you” in the end haunts me still😭💔

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cain instinct

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Three months ago I saw a clip of some guys struggling to light a cigarette. One grabs a hammer and starts whacking a steel rod then uses the generated heat to light it and they all lose their minds.

Anyway I entered a fugue state for a bit and here we are.

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He's just sleeping he's just sleeping he's just sleeping he's jus

Ko-Fi

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I have free will and also pto at work🙈

Is this anything?

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BBC MERLIN 2.12 ✽ The Fires of Idirsholas

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Friendly reminder that this conversation takes place in 01x03:

Note:

The ambiguity of his response to Morgana.

His choice of words. The right person to love. Not woman. Person.

And then, only one (1) episode later:

He didn’t even hesitate.

It seems he had, in fact, found the right person to love.

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No longer will we be guided by invisible hands. The Arcane will free us and I am its herald.

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night sketches

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Well. I’ve stopped crying now (kinda), but there’s still a lump in my throat😞 let’s do this one last time

✨gay things on bbc merlin✨ s5 e13:

I don’t want to quote the entire episode because the entire episode is the culmination of merthur, of their devotion, their friendship, their soulmate-ship, their love. Merlin opening up to him and Arthur accepting him for who he is, even though not right away, but (I am convinced) only because he didn’t tell him sooner. Because Arthur was sure he would accept Merlin for who he is no matter what - because he knows it’s just Merlin, magic or not - it’s his Merlin, and nothing would ever change that.

Here’s my favorite merthur lines from the episode instead:

“Why are you still acting like a servant?” “Because you’re my friend and I don’t want to lose you.”

“I almost smashed your head with a mace when we first met.” “And I won using magic.” “You tricked me!..”

“I am destined to serve you Arthur, and I wouldn’t change a thing.”

“Merlin, I don’t want you to change who you are.”

“Just hold me…”

“I’m going to tell you something… something I never said to you before… Thank you.”

Merlin wailing as he’s dragging Arthur’s dead body to the lake, “He’s my friend! I can’t lose him!”💔

Welp, now I’m crying again😞 Thank you for following my gay spiraling for all 65 episodes while I watched Merlin for the first time✨ This is one of the best shows I’ve seen and I will hold it dearly in my heart❤️

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arthur in text posts

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arthur getting emotionally vulnerable only when there’s a crackling fire and no one else but merlin around

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You know what - FUCK THIS SHOW

FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT

How DARE YOU

How DAREEEE

FUCK YOUUUU CREATORS

FUCK YOUUUU ACTORS FOR BEING TOO FUCKING GOOD AT YOUR JOB

FUCK YOU FOR RIPPING MY HEART OUT AND TEARING IT UP INTO SHREDS AND MAKING ME WEEP LIKE A BABY

FUCK THIS SHOW (affectionate)

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✨gay things on bbc merlin✨ s5 e12:

Merlin and Arthur playing dice at the tavern with the same level of flirtatious banter as s1 e1🥰

Arthur’s face falling when Merlin tells him with his sad puppy eyes and a crack in his voice that he can’t go with him this time🥺

When he tells Merlin he never actually thought of him as a coward, he always thought Merlin was the bravest man he’s ever known - rip my heart out why don’t you😭😭

Arthur literally hearing Merlin’s voice in his sleep, as he’s laying next to his wife in bed-

Old Merlin carrying Arthur across the battlefield😭😭

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some Frodo for the soul ( I’m tryna hype myself up to get through the second half of two towers)

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🥀Bbc merlin s5 e11🥀

This is sick and twisted and also i am sad and angry about everything that happened in this episode😭