dontshakethecameras - Tumblr blog

[dontshakethecameras]

you pull me in and I'm a little more brave or the ballad of Callie and Celeste

[Camera turns on and is pointed at Callie, who's sitting in a chair, facing it, vlog style. She's wearing a t shirt and jeans, a beanie covering her head]

Callie: "So we're supposed to do a vlog style video diary for our project in media studies. Just talk about our day and add some b roll. The problem is that nothing ever happens. The biggest thing that happened is that Bren invited a new girl in her history class to hang out with us. She's..." [her nose scrunches] "She's fine, I guess. She's from a big city. Bren seems to get along with her, which is weird because they're opposites. I don't know. I don't think I like her. Her name's Celeste. Anyway, I'm going to hang out with the group later, so we'll see how that goes."

[camera turns off]

[camera turns on, showing Callie in a different variation of the outfit she wore in the first clip]

Callie: "Celeste told us today that she was bisexual. Like she likes guys and girls. Duh. Obviously. That's what that means. I don't know. It makes me feel weird. Mom and Dad always say that 'those kinds of people' are going to hell. I don't believe them, but it gave me a weird fluttering in my chest, thinking about her liking girls. Kissing them." [she stares off for a moment, before shaking her head and coming back to reality] "Anyway, Celeste isn't as bad as I thought. Shes actually pretty cool. Maybe we can be friends after all." [another pause before she rolls her eyes] "These are honestly the most boring 'vlogs' ever. This is why I like being behind the camera more, for the record. But yeah. I made a new friend I guess. Just a couple weeks too late."

[camera turns off]

[camera turns on, revealing Callie in what could be called her standard uniform]

Callie: "So, Celeste and I actually hung out one on one today. We snuck into a movie and shared some gummy bears she had in her bag. It was a terrible movie, but a lot of fun, and probably not something you should admit on a project for school." [she laughs] "There was a moment when our hands touched and I felt that little flutter again. I don't know what that means."

[camera turns off]

[camera turns on, this time at a different angle, still looking at Callie, but clearly being held by someone else]

Voice: "I'm just saying, I think you could be a star if you wanted. You've got the look for it."

Callie: [laughs] "Sure, Celeste. Now, be serious. You said you'd let me interview you for this assignment."

Celeste: [laughs] "Maybe I want to know the director. The person behind the camera. You really never perform?" [Callie shakes her head] "Well. We've got to change that." [the camera moves, being set down] "Come on. Sing with me."

[Fearless by Taylor Swift starts playing]

Callie: [laughing] "You can't be serious." [Celeste just holds out her hand until finally Callie reluctantly takes it, letting the other girl pull her up]

[camera turns on, revealing Callie in the same clothes as before, a dreamy smile and faraway look on her face]

[Celeste starts singing and dancing around the room, wiggling Callie's arms and getting her to loosen up, until Callie is singing and dancing with Celeste as well, twirling and spinning her. Until the song gets to the bridge, the line "you pull me in and I'm a little more brave" Celeste spins into Callie and the girls are closer than they've ever been, within kissing distance. the laughter stops as they look at each other, until the girls lean in and kiss on the line about first kisses. Callie pulls away quickly, but just as suddenly, kisses Celeste again, who laughs. They kiss for awhile until Celeste remembers the camera, shutting it off]

[camera shuts off]

Callie: "She kissed me."

[camera shuts off]

[camera turns on to reveal a lot of b roll of Celeste, over multiple hang outs, the person filming her clearly infatuated with her and she them. sometimes a hand that Celeste is holding will come into view. if they're in a group, the camera has a hard time focusing on anyone but her]

[camera shuts off]

[camera turns on to reveal an empty bedroom, Callie's bedroom. Clearly, it had been accidentally left on. A moment later, the door opens and Callie and Celeste enter, laughing and kissing. Callie seems light and happy, almost carefree as she kisses Celeste eagerly]

Callie: Have I mentioned how much I like you recently?

Celeste: [laughs] Only about a dozen times. You really are a useless lesbian stereotype.

Callie: [bites her lip] But you still like me?

Celeste: Oh, I really like you.

[the pair resume kissing. After a moment, Callie notices the camera]

Callie: Hang on, I think my camera's on.

[Callie and Celeste walk to it, and Callie reaches out to turn it off]

[camera shut off]

[camera turns on to reveal Callie, clearly later in the year, weather warmer. No beanie and in an old band tee and cutoff jeans sitting in the chair. Celeste sits next to her on the arm rest, in denim shorts and a tank top]

Callie: "I can't believe you want to be here for this."

Celeste: "I wanna see the magic happen. I wanna see you vlog."

Callie: "You do. You're in them."

Celeste: "Not these parts."

Callie: "You're a menace."

Celeste, grinning: "But you like me."

[Callie gazes at her before remembering what she needs to do, looking back at the camera]

Callie: "So we're going to go hang out at the beach with our friends, and then sleep over at Bren's house. I need to talk to them all tonight anyway because of... reasons."

[she and Celeste look at each other like they share a secret]

Callie, to Celeste: "I really wanna kiss you."

Celeste, smiling: "You should, I'm very kissable."

[the pair lean in and kiss, and then keep kissing, finally, Callie breaks away]

Callie: "I have to turn the camera off. Say goodbye, Celeste."

Celeste: "Goodbye, Celeste."

[Callie reaches out to turn off the camera as Celeste moves to kiss her again, Callie giggles]

[camera shuts off]

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good luck babe! or sometimes truths acted on in the darkness have a funny way of looking like lies in the daylight.

Callie woke up with a jolt. It was a strange feeling, going from the dead of sleep to being awake. It was silent, no rain or howling winds. She could see the power had turned back on. Which was good. She had an interview with Asha today to talk about the whole being dead thing in an hour according to Bunny's alarm clock.

Callie jolted again. Bunny. Everything she confessed. Everything they did. It all came back to her in one terrible, awful, amazing, wonderful wave. And then, even worse: Celeste. The girl she loved before. The girl she loved now. How could she do that to her? Sure, a lot of weird things happened, but she just... and now this... and she wasn't even sure she could deal with what all of this meant.

Suddenly, awfully, Callie needed out of there. She needed out of this room and away from where Bunny was sleeping next to her so peacefully. Naked. Because they'd had sex. She'd had sex with a girl. She was thrilled. She was alive. She'd never felt more like herself. She was terrified. She was ashamed. She was going to hell. She jumped out of bed as quickly as she could without waking Bunny up.

She threw on her clothes quickly, hoping her beanie covered her sex hair okay. Sure, she wasn't due at Sunny Side Up for an hour, but she could review her notes. She could get a coffee. She could. She could breathe. She knew she was being shitty to Bunny. She knew it, but she couldn't stop herself. She was terrified. She was still the same girl trying to outrun things.

She looked at Bunny sleeping peacefully and tore a page out of a notebook, hurriedly scrawling: I can't. I'm sorry. Please don't hate me. She set in on her pillow and bolted from the room, from the house, desperately waiting for her chest to let her breathe again.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Her brain ensconced in a haze of lust, Bunny bit her lip as she watched Callie’s movements. She wanted to beg for so many things, to show what she wanted but kept quiet. She wanted to see what the other girl would do. And being stripped down to her panties felt as though it was drawn out to torture her so, when Callie’s fingers stroked her panties, Bunny’s hips bucked up. Begging for more with an appreciative whimper, she parted her legs further for the other girl. “You’re so pretty, Callie,” she murmured, feeling something like drunk and without filter as she spoke, “you could take me apart just by kissing my cheek. You don’t realize… you have no much power you have over me.” It was maybe too much, yet couldn’t stop herself. She wanted Callie to touch her, but more than anything she wanted Callie to know how much power that touch held.

Callie didn’t understand how any of what Bunny was saying could be true, not when she felt so utterly powerless around the girl. Even now, when she was arguably in the more dominant position, all she wanted to do was, well, worship. She thought it was so funny how for the past eighteen years of her life, people all around her told her that the attraction she felt towards women was deviant and sinful and dirty. She had heard it so much Callie wasn’t sure she didn’t still believe it in some ways. But this, right here, this moment between her and bunny with her fingers against Bunny’s panties, against Bunny’s slit, the tantalizing wetness there, all Callie could think was that this moment was holy. All she could see were the stained glasses of church and hear the bells and truly think that there was nothing more right than this moment. This moment of taking what she wanted and claiming it as her own. Even if she wasn’t as brave in the daylight. But she pushed the thought aside. That wasn’t a thought for now. For now there was her and Bunny and the worship she wanted -needed- to do.

Callie leaned in and kissed the blonde again, rubbing her fingers against her slit one last time before pulling them away to hook in the girl’s panties and slide them down her legs, dropping them with the rest of the clothes that were now scattered to the floor. She kissed and licked and nipped down Bunny’s body, parting her legs just a little more for her so she could nestle between them. Her heart was pounding and racing as she looked at the sight before her. It was breathtaking. She pressed a kiss to Bunny’s thigh, building anticipation for both of them, repeating the action on the other thigh, her hands running along Bunny’s hips. She looked at her wet slit, and she had never wanted anything more. She glanced back up at Bunny one last time before leaning in, her tongue darting out to tease along the sensitive flesh, trying to make Bunny feel one tenth as good as she made her feel.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

She fought for control of herself, to keep from rushing things, but small moans escaped her lips as Callie touched and tasted the skin of her breasts, working Bunny’s nipples into stiff pink peaks while causing her to clamp her thighs together tightly. “You don’t have to describe it, Calliope,” she gasped out, her body arching into every touch as if to plead for more, as one of her hands allowed their fingers to become tangled in Callie’s hair, “just… show me?”

Show her? She could definitely try to show her. Callie nodded against the girl, peppering her skin with more kisses, her hands following the trail they made to the waistband of her pants. Callie sighed against the skin. Surreally, she wasn’t sure if her heart was beating faster than when Bunny had been in this position not moments before or now when she was about to do the same things. There were a million things she wanted to say in this moment: you’re beautiful, I like you, I want to do this so much but I’m terrified I’ll be bad at it, please don’t stop liking me. But she kept her mouth shut, and she began sliding Bunny’s pants down, down, down, checking to make sure things were still in the affirmative until it was just Bunny in her underwear. And God, wasn’t that a sight. Hesitantly, carefully, but wantingly, Callie reached up and stroked the girls folds through the fabric of her panties, another tremble rolling through her at the action.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

She meant to say something clever, but all that came from her lips was a soft, gasping “okay”. She hadn’t had a hickey since she was fifteen, yet now she wanted Callie to mark her with one that would last for weeks. She wanted a reminder of the night, that is was real on not a lascivious dream Bunny’s brain had created to torture her with want. It wasn’t a dream though. No dream had ever felt so good that she wanted to beg for more, yet wanted Callie to take her time with her. “That’s a very good thing,” she gasped out, her breasts heaving slightly, desperately trying to seek out more of Callie’s touch.

If Callie had ever doubted her attraction to girls, she needn’t look no further than right here. This moment for proof that she was wholeheartedly, devastatingly, mind meltingly attracted to girls. Only girls. Every other sexual encounter she had ever had, she had found herself wanting to race to the part where she pretended to be satisfied and the guy she was with went back to playing video games or whatever else he wanted to do. But in her moments with Celeste, and even more than that, this moment right here with Bunny, getting to do and say and feel the things she never thought she was going to be allowed to do or say or feel... she wanted it to last forever. A huge part of her also wanted to get to “the good stuff” here too, but for an entirely different reason. Still, she wanted to exercise restraint and patience, because she didn’t know if she’d ever have this chance again. Didn’t know that outside the confines of the blackout and the safeness of the dark, she’d feel secure enough to touch and feel and want.

Callie kissed the tops of Bunny’s breasts, her fingers still squeezing and kneading them. She let out her own little sound of pleasure at the touch, the taste of this girl. “You are...” She didn’t know how to finish that sentence. Because right now, Callie was pretty sure Bunny was everything. And this, what Callie was doing right now, had to be worship. What else could it be? She was stumbling, unsure if she was doing it right, but so, so devoted to showing her awe and appreciation. She rubbed one of the blonde’s breasts between her fingers, toying with the nub, stiffening it before taking it in her mouth, twirling her tongue around it, before releasing it and repeating the actions on the other breast before finally moving to start kissing down the rest of Bunny’s body, her tongue moving over the soft, hot, salty skin. Callie let out a soft moan against Bunny’s skin. She wanted so much. “You are.... you are.... god, I can’t even find the words to describe everything. You’re fucking art, Bunny.”

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Bunny felt drunk, Callie’s lips on her lips, her jaw, her neck, her skin heating up wherever the other girl touched her. “Are you trying to give me a hickey?” she giggled, biting her lower lip, “because I’m not opposed if you are.” The thought of being seen around town after being marked as belonging Callie caused a little moan to slip past Bunny’s lips, her hips writhing slightly of their own accord. “You’re the only girl I ever want to touch me.”

“I’m not trying to give you a hickey, I am giving you a hickey.” Callie replied to the girl’s question, finishing leaving her mark on the girl’s skin. She didn’t know when this would stop feeling novel. Sure, she had had sex before, but it was never like this. She never longed for the next touch, the next noise, the next sensation as she did now. Her lips continued their trail down Bunny’s neck, her hands coming up to cup her breasts, squeezing them lightly. This wasn’t the first time touching someone, kissing someone, but it was different from even Celeste. She hadn’t had time to appreciate it, hadn’t had time to feel more than the longing that came with it. But she felt so much now. So much longing, so much desire, so much want, especially as Bunny writhed against her. “I guess it’s a good thing I still have a lot of places I want to touch you.” She said, kissing the blonde’s collarbone, her thumbs rolling over the girl’s nipples.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

“Yes,” she grinned, pressing her lips to Callie’s with more enthusiasm then she meant to. But she didn’t let herself pull away. She didn’t want to pull away. “I just didn’t want you to if you thought you had to,” she murmured against the brunette’s lips, “but I want you to if you want to. I want you to so much.” Bunny needed to stop talking, yet she couldn’t… she didn’t want to. She wanted Callie to know how she felt, wanted to be completely open with her so that there wasn’t any doubt about what she wanted. 

Callie’s heart kicked up again at Bunny’s agreement. “Okay.” She said, a small, stupid smile playing over her face. “Then I’m going to, because I want you so much.” She said, echoing Bunny’s words back at her.  She kissed the other girl again for a moment, before pulling her mouth away to kiss the girl’s jaw and neck, her lips trailing along the girl’s skin slowly savoring the feeling. Her hands slipped up the blonde’s hips, feeling the soft, smooth skin, and Calliope took it in, thinking that in that moment she could never get tired of this. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Bunny.” She murmured into her skin, taking a moment to leave a mark, before her lips moved to her collarbone. “You feel amazing.”

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

There was nothing better in the world than having Calliope Ellis kiss her back, Bunny was certain of that. She wanted to fall asleep kissing Callie, to wake up next to her in the morning, but then she felt the brunette pull away slightly and her eyes blinked open. Gazing at Callie, at the way she bit her lip in a way that was both cute and sexy, what she said next bowled Bunny over. Nodding softly, she leaned forward so that her lips could brush against the other girl’s. “Only if you want to. I wanted you to feel good, you don’t owe me anything, okay?”

Callie leaned into the lip brush, properly kissing the girl again for a few brief seconds. She could let it end. She could stay in this happy, blissed out state and be perfectly content. She could do that. But more than anything else at the moment, she wanted to make Bunny feel as good as she did, wanted Bunny to feel the euphoria she had. Callie knew it would be different for the other girl, she had had sex before, she wasn’t still practically a closet case afraid of saying the actual L word, but she wanted to be the reason for Bunny to feel that euphoria, even if it was only ever just this once. She looked at the girl, into her brown eyes. “I want to. I really, really want to. And I know that probably sounds really dumb and thirsty and I promise it’s not just because I want to keep having sex with you -although I do really like that too- I just... I want you to feel good. I want to make you feel good.” She leaned closer to the girl, bringing up her hand to hold her chin again, so close she could kiss her again if she wanted. Her words were a whisper against the other girl’s lips, a question and promise in one. “Will you let me? Please?”

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

The moment she felt Callie let herself fall, Bunny felt… it was so passionate, so intimate, and all she wanted was more. Making the brunette writhe, feeling her clenching around Bunny’s fingers, she eased Callie through her orgasm, trying to prolong the moment for the other girl before she felt her body slowly relax. Setting Callie gently back on the bed, she looked up at the other girl and smiled, feeling a blush creep across her cheeks again. “I wanted you to feel good,” she murmured as her hair was brushed back. Sitting up, Bunny moved until she was lying next to Callie again, leaning in and kissing her softly. “You should always feel good.”

Callie knew it was a cliche, to be so completely blissed out from having sex, and yet there she was. She felt so good, so happy, so light for the first time in what felt like a long time. She smirked a little seeing Bunny’s blush, biting her lip afterwards. All she could think was that she knew what those lips felt like when they kissed. She knew what they tasted like. She knew what they felt like when they were doing... other things. It was such a trippy, amazing experience. For a really long time, Callie had really felt like she was going to end up alone. She didn’t get to have this; she was going to be single forever, tell everyone “the right one” just hadn’t come along yet. It was only after she met Celeste that thought began to change, and then it was taken from her. And then, coming back, she thought it would be that way again. But there was Bunny and what they had just done was amazing. She couldn’t stop thinking about it.

She smiled into the kiss, kissing her back, reaching up and holding her chin gently as they did. She wanted Bunny to feel as good as she felt. Wanted her to be as totally happy and blissed out as she was in this very moment. Callie’s hand trailed down to Bunny’s neck, resting there softly. She pulled away just slightly, looking at the girl again. She bit her lip, suddenly nervous and shy once again. But she could do this. She would do this. Callie really, really wanted to anyway. “Can I, um, can I make you feel good?”  She asked, her hand moving from Bunny’s neck to trail down her arm.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Hearing that she was close, Bunny pulled her tongue out from within the warmth of Callie’s folds, replacing it with two fingers stroking into the other girl. “You look so beautiful, Callie, and you feel so good. I’ve never- its never felt like this with anyone,” she said, pressing a kiss to her clit. She felt euphoric, like Callie writhing beneath her was better than any high, like she couldn’t help but tell the truth and it didn’t scare her. With Callie in that moment nothing scared her. “I’ve got you, Calliope,” she murmured, her tongue swirled over the clit, desperately lapping at the nub, as her fingers continued stroking into Callie, “It’s okay to let go.”

She was teetering on the edge of a cliff, wanting desperately to fall, but still being afraid there was nothing but pain at the bottom. Callie had never been this vulnerable with anyone before. Not all the guys she slept with and dated to make her attraction to girls stop, not Bren who she couldn’t tell her big secret to, not even Celeste, who saw that truth in her and loved her for it. She was literally naked with Bunny in the moment, but it was more than that. She had never so quickly and willingly given herself over to another person -another woman- the way she was with the blonde. And she was scared. It was everything she grew up being told not to want, that it was wrong to want. It was so easy to get lost in that fear. But Bunny’s hands and mouth on her didn’t feel wrong. They felt wonderful. She felt wonderful. Callie wanted to stay here, having sex with Bunny forever. She never wanted to leave the little bubble they had created for themselves.

“I’ve got you, Calliope. It’s okay to let go.” Bunny’s words rang in her head. She felt them in her bones, in her blood. And in that moment, she believed her. She whimpered, her hips bucking up one more time, grinding against the girl as she ran to the edge of cliff. Her eyes were closed, and she was so close. She felt herself clench in warning before, all at once, she came with a cry. She felt like fireworks and confetti and lightning. Her heart pounded in her chest and she had never felt so alive as she had in that moment. She took a breath, trying to catch it. She felt vulnerable again, it was the first time someone besides herself had ever made something like that happen for her, and it was amazing. She looked down at Bunny, amazement and happiness and so many other emotions in her eyes. “That was....” She racked her brain, trying to come up with any collection of words that could describe how she felt in the moment, and she found herself lacking. “Wow. I don’t even think I can describe it.” She brushed some of Bunny’s hair back.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Bunny smiled at the grip Callie had on her hair, the polite way in which she swore. That Callie thought she was magic… she wanted to pull back so that she could reply, so that she could say anything, but the warmth, the taste, of Callie was intoxicating that she wouldn’t let herself pull away. She wanted nothing more than to free this moment, to forever be in the midst of making love on her bed in the midst of a blackout and a rainstorm. Her lips were now pressed to the velvet entrance of Callie’s warmth, her tongue moving like a lathe within the other girl, while her thumb began making more focused slow little circles against the sensitive little nub of Callie’s clit.

She was already close, she knew she was. It was honestly a little embarrassing how gone she was in the moment. But Bunny’s mouth and hands were... everything. Callie honestly could only barely feel the fabric of the sheets and pillows below her, the only sensations she felt were the ones the other girl was causing. She was vaguely aware that she had started trembling, because she was close, she was so damn close. But she was afraid too. Afraid to truly let go, to give herself over to the sensations and just fall off the cliff. She had never had a soft place to land when it came to her attraction to women, not at large, and to let go and give physical, undeniable proof of that attraction, that want, that need, scared her. “I-I’m close.” She managed to get out, managed to admit. Her grip tightened just slightly on the sheet, bracing herself as best she could.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

She hadn’t expected that reaction, but it spurred her on. Plunging her tongue into the warmth before her, desperate to taste Callie, to drown in the girl laid out before her. Bunny wanted to unlock her, to open Callie up with her tongue. It was intoxicating, knowing that the sounds, the swearing, the everything, was because of her and she wanted more. Raising Callie’s legs slightly, she moved them so they rested over Bunny’s own shoulders, giving the other girl more control. And yet even as she did, her thumb brushed softly against the other girl’s clit, desperate to urge her on, desperate for her to use Bunny’s mouth in every way she wanted to.

Callie whimpered when she felt Bunny’s thumb, her grip on the girl’s hair and the sheet tightening just slightly. It was maddening. It was utterly maddening and awful and she felt like she was going to break from the intensity of it all. But it was also wonderful and amazing and nothing had ever felt this good ever and she wanted to stay here in this moment with Bunny’s mouth on her forever. She arched her hips slightly once again, grinding a little when her legs had been adjusted, desperate and wanting more. She wasn’t sure she would be able to stand it. She closed her eyes from the intensity of it all, could feel release coiling in the pit of her stomach. But she wasn’t ready. Not yet. She wanted to hold onto this for a little bit longer. “Fuck, please.” She breathed out, her hips grinding just slightly again. She wanted to keep as cool as she possibly could. “You’re fucking magic, I swear to God.” She wasn’t sure where the words or vocalizations kept coming from; she was always fairly quiet during sex before unless she had to fake something. It really blew her away that she was so different, so much more real and alive and present than she had ever been before. It terrified her. It thrilled her

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Releasing the stiffened nipple from between her teeth, Bunny shook her head. “I promise I’m not going to kill you,” she purred before kissing her way across Callie’s chest. This time she swirled her tongue over the nipple first, then gently catching it between her teeth before her lips completely enveloped it with a kiss. “I promise I’m not going to kill you, but I’m going to try and make you see god.” Her brain didn’t have a chance to even process what she’d said before she heard what Callie had to say next and she blushed, looking up at her. The look on Callie’s face was otherworldly beautiful and that Bunny was responsible for some of that… it focused her. “It’s the hottest thing you’ve seen for the moment.”

Pressing kisses and the occasional gentle love bite down toward Callie’s belly before pulling away, sitting up slightly to undo the other girl’s jeans and tugging them off. Stopping to gaze at Callie, to check that her reaction was still in the affirmative, Bunny hooked her fingers beneath the elastic of the panties, the last piece of clothing on the other girl, and tugged them off. Then she allowed herself to gaze at Callie once more, to take in the glow of beauty and desire laid out before her. Then her head dipped low to softly press kisses to Callie’s inner thigh, slowly and carefully nudging the other girl’s legs apart as she did. And then her tongue was on Callie’s slit, carefully teasing the delicate flesh.

"I think I'm looking at her." Callie managed to get out. Oh god, that was lame. It was beyond lame. Did being in the throws of passion always make her this lame? She was going to have to work on that. But that was a future problem for a future Callie. She wasn't sure she was capable of much rational thought right now anyway. Not with Bunny promising it was the hottest thing she had seen so far. Not with Bunny pulling her jeans and underwear down.

The anticipation was killing her. The thigh kisses. The waiting. She whimpered again, and fought to not arch her hips up, but that pretty much became a moot point when she felt Bunny's tongue, her hips arching right up wanting -needing- more. One of her hands left the sheet and went into Bunny's hair, holding on. "Holy shit!" She gasped. "Jesus fucking Christ!" She wondered if she was always so sensitive. She had enough presence of mind to wonder if this was what her parents expected all the years of church and Sunday school would amount to: taking the Lord’s name in vain while having sex with a girl. The thought almost made her laugh, before lust came flooding back into her brain. She wondered if she was always this sensitive. Any of the other times she had sex, she couldn’t think so. Granted, those were very different circumstances, but she didn’t want to think to hard about it. She wondered if she should be embarrassed for how much she wanted. But she couldn’t at the moment; she just did.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

Not having to be told twice, Bunny slowly moved up over Callie’s body, her naked breasts grazing the other girl’s bare stomach as she did. Then her lips brushed against Callie’s as she drew her up, pulling off the shirt and tossing it aside. Then there was a pause, the two of them frozen in the moment, before she reached behind Callie and undid her bra before slowly slipping it off. Callie seemed to float there for a moment before settling back down on the mattress, giving Bunny a chance to marvel at her. 

“Do you know how beautiful you are, Calliope?” she said, dipping her head to the valley between Callie’s breasts to murmur the question before pressing kisses to the sweet, soft skin. Trailing kisses until her lips reached the nipple of one of Callie’s breast, her hand coming to fondle the other. Pressing a kiss, she caught the soft nub between her teeth before releasing and then swirling her tongue over it. “So beautiful, Callie. You’re so absolutely beautiful.”

Yeah, Callie was sure she was dying. She had no other word for the sensations wracking her body at the moment and she wasn't sure she was going to be able to stand it. It was one thing, when kissing and touching women was only an imagination, when it was nothing more than a few heated makeouts with Celeste and the kissing she had done with Bunny before it got to this. This... this was something else entirely. Like. She kind of wanted to tell the blonde that she was pretty sure she was fucking magic because nothing on the history of the planet had ever made Callie feel this good and alive and real and honestly that was kind of unfair because all she had really done was kissed and touched her boobs and how was Callie supposed to survive the rest of this?

Her body, for its part, acted of it's own accord, arching up where Bunny's lips and hands were, desperately wanting more. She whimpered at the sheer want of it all. Her hands gripped the sheets, trying to ground herself. She heard Bunny's voice and honestly that did nothing to stop the fire that had coiled inside her, had pooled between her legs. "Fuck!" She gasped when she felt Bunny's lips, teeth, tongue on her nipple, writhing once again. "I think... I think you're going to kill me." She said honestly. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." She was vaguely aware she was saying stuff, but only moderately aware of the words coming out of her mouth. "And like honestly, the hottest thing I've ever seen is you, right here, half naked on top of me."

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

The way Callie kissed her… it felt unreal. It was an end of the world type of kiss… no one had kissed her like that. Taking in what Callie had said, Bunny nodded before leaning in to kiss the girl again while moving to change their positions, her on top with Callie laid out on the bed. It felt like she was rushing, yet felt like she could do just that, that if she felt Callie hesitate or pull away even a little bit she would stop.

Pushing her hands beneath the t-shirt the other girl wore, Bunny pulled the material up until it bunched up over her bra. Pulling away from the kiss, she gave Callie a conspiratorial grin before moving lower, her lips pressing kisses down the other girl’s stomach. The skin felt just as soft beneath her lips as it had beneath her fingers, tasted sweet and salty when she licked it. “I’m going to show you how good it can feel with a girl,” she purred against Callie’s belly before gazing up at Callie. “Would you like it if I came back up there and take off your shirt?”

She was going to die. She was absolutely, positively going to die. Again. That was the only thing racing through her brain at the feeling of Bunny’s hands on her, her lips against her skin. Well, she thought in a moment of total acceptance, this would definitely be a better way to go than the first time. She felt warm. Hot. All of the fear and hesitance replaced with something much more potent: want. It thrilled her. It terrified her because she was scared she was going to look like a total idiot. This wasn’t the first time she had ever kissed a girl, but it was the first time she had ever let it get as far as they had. And for the life of her, Callie couldn’t think of a single logical reason she and Bunny hadn’t already done this. Hadn’t already done this a million times. She needed to get it together. She knew that. But the image of Bunny lowkey between her legs, getting ready to do whatever the fuck she was about to do, asking Callie if she wanted her to take off her shirt (yes! Definitely! Absolutely!) was a lot for her to manage at the moment. She wasn’t sure she even remembered to form words yet. And they hadn’t done anything yet besides kiss.

It was so startling, comparing her last true sexual encounter (with Wen) to what she felt right now with Bunny. In a moment of perfect clarity, once again washing over her, Callie couldn’t believe she had ever thought she could be anything other than gay. Other than the lesbian disaster she knew she was, even with all the time she spent trying to fight it. Because that was the key. The want. Any time she had been with a guy, even if they didn’t sleep together, she never wanted to kiss them or touch them, not the way they wanted to touch her. Callie had never felt like she would die if they didn’t. Not like it is now. “Yes,” she breathed out, trying to remain some crumb of sexy self respect. “yes, I want that.” Honestly, she’d take the damn shirt off herself if it meant Bunny would keep kissing and licking at her skin the way she had been.

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

“Well you certainly know what you’re doing when it comes to kissing,” Bunny said, giving Callie what she hoped was an encouraging smile. Still she couldn’t just ignore the nervousness in the other girl’s voice over what was obviously uncharted territory. Cupping Callie’s face, she pressed on, realizing that both their admissions had given her pause. Callie hadn’t been with a girl before and Bunny wanted to make love to her. Not fuck her, but make love. “It’s okay, Callie. I’ve got you. I promise.” She pressed a kiss to Callie’s lips, softer this time, slower, before pulling away slightly. “I’d like to undress you, to kiss you, touch you, and I’d like… I want to make feel you good, to feel adored, but I don’t want to rush you. We can slow down, we can stop. Just because we kissed or because we’re on my bed… you don’t have to do anything because you don’t owe me anything.”

Callie let herself listen to Bunny, let the gentleness of the kiss settle her nerves more than she thought it would. She exhaled, letting any anxiety go with it. There were still questions and concerns to discuss, but they could wait, couldn’t they? Because she wanted this. She wanted this more than she had wanted anything in awhile, even with all the confusing thoughts in her head about coming out versus not, going home versus not, all her mixed up feelings about Celeste. All that mattered at that moment was her and Bunny and the bed and whatever they wanted to do. She was standing on a precipice, one she had only stood on a handful of other times. Callie knew she could pull back, she could tell Bunny no and that it truly would be okay, Bunny wouldn’t be upset with her. In a lot of ways, that was the safer option, it would make everything neater and tidier and less complicated than what they would be. It would be backing away from this cliff Callie had suddenly found herself staring down. But the more she thought about it, the more all she could think of was Bunny’s lips on hers, Bunny’s body on hers, Bunny’s hands on hers. And she found herself (almost mood killingly) thinking about when she died. How no one except Celeste had truly known her and what was in her heart with what she felt. Who she wanted to be with. She didn’t want to go back to that. Consequences be damned.

She leaned in, kissing the blonde again, cupping her face with one hand, deep and slow and filled with a wanting, a yearning, Callie couldn’t quite name. She put everything into that kiss: all of her feelings, all of the uncertainty, but most of all the undeniable, tangible want of it all. Callie kissed her like it was the only thing she knew how to do (and who knows? Maybe she had forgotten everything else before this moment). Eventually, she pulled away, her forehead rested against Bunny’s. “I want you,” She said, her heartrate picking up again at the simple confession. “I want you to kiss me and touch me and just... have me. I don’t know how to tell you everything I feel right now, and I’m hoping there will be time for that later, but I... I want this, Bunny. I’m sure. Surer than I’ve been about anything recently.” And in that moment with just the two of them and the little bubble they created, she meant it. She wanted this. Everything else could wait. 

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half-the-sugar-twice-the-spice​:

With Callie’s hands stroking her skin Bunny felt exquisite, adored, and wished she could distill the moment. Not just the need or the lust, but the gentle of the kiss that had preceded it, the confession in the kitchen, the way it’d felt when Callie’s hand had first brushed against hers. The keening noise she made at the kisses Callie pressed to her flesh… maybe she sound ridiculous, but it didn’t matter. One of Bunny’s hands, finally losing its shyness, slipped beneath the hem of Callie’s shirt and she felt drunk on the feeling of the other girl’s skin beneath her fingertips. It was silk, Callie’s skin was made of silk, was all she could think until she brushed against the bra clasp. “Can I take this off of you? Both of these?” she gasped out. “Can I take them off so I can touch you? I know what I said before, but I need to touch you because you’re silk and marble… because-” Bunny pulled back slightly, because she wanted to look at Callie when she said the words to her, “because… if it’s okay… I want to make love to you.”

Everything felt so heady. The kisses, the touches, every moment tonight that had led up to this one. Callie wasn’t sure she was the same person she had been before she went into the kitchen with Bunny, before she came the closest she ever had to using the word lesbian. With all of the bliss, the undeniable bliss, there was a certain level of fear, too. Was she truly ready to make this leap? Let go of everything she had thought and known and been for the past eighteen years up until this moment? What did that mean? There were so many questions kicking around in her head, but she didn’t want to focus on any of them right now, not in this moment. She knew they’d have to eventually, but she just wanted to hold on to the surreal, almost magical feeling she had right now. She nodded in answer to Bunny’s question, her heart racing. “Okay. I-I want that. But I... I-I might be bad at it. I don’t exactly have a lot of experience with... this.” She hated that she sounded nervous, but it didn’t change how much she wanted this to happen in the moment.