darsbw

[darsbw]

Have I been indoctrinated

egg

[darsbw]

egg

[darsbw]

Pookies help the concept of time is peer pressuring me into giving them my lunch money I need divorce documents STAT

[darsbw]

“I once brought up mothman in class and you could see him get visibly angry and say ‘don’t play poker with him’ before muttering something about 10 dollars. He then disappeared for, like, 5 days and when he came back he had a giant moth antenna and ten dollars sitting on his desk. 5/5 dunno what his deal is but I’m pretty certain he could kill god.”

Hc that Ford gets a job at a local community college as a physics prof after he and Stan are done sailing around the world and fulfills his destiny as the eccentric professor he was always meant to be

And he quickly gains a reputation amongst the stem students as That Professor

I bet his ratemyprof reviews would be insane:

“He didn’t grade any of our homework until the end of the semester, but he brought something called a ‘plaidypus’ to class and let us pet it. Her name was Dorothy. 5/5”

“He constantly ranted about how ‘triangles are the most untrustworthy shape’ whatever that means. Also he doesn’t know how to use the internet. I hated his class. 5/5”

And many more iterations of “this guy is terrible. 5 stars”

[darsbw]

Even better: it actually kills bill and everything goes back to normal.

au where in response to the end of the world and his family being missing for days stan says fuck it and decides to roll the infinity die

[darsbw]

You know what I have not gotten any ads about Snow White at all, but Ive been getting so SO many polybuzz ads that, I might add, I BLOCK every time I see them. They’re a PLAUGE. Every single time I get any sort of ad, it’s for polybuzz. I wonder if the YouTube algorithm just decided “You’re going to download this app you don’t want and actively disgusts you to stare at the same way tobeus got Snow White advertising

Ppl debating if wokeness or anti wokeness is the reason Snow White flopped when the real answer is the movie looked like total dogshit

[darsbw]

ALL OF THOSE EVIL SCIENTISTS HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO CONDUCT RESEARCH! Don’t they understand if you use the SAME PERSON for the ‘creating a mutant creature’ test AND the ‘cryostasis for 100 years’ test it’s GOING TO SKEW THE RESULTS!!!!! NO im not “above average tolerance for humans” you SPLICED my dna with a goblin shark, raven, therizinosauraus, and that undercooked spaghetti noodle you found on the ground, OF COURSE my data is wrong! And don’t get me STARTED on the poor sap who got ‘injected with random needles’ and ‘see how fast he can complete a maze’! Idiots!

[darsbw]

Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire Bring back the Roman empire

[darsbw]

Ah yes. I’m so glad my favorite snack finally has a healthier option.

[darsbw]

Haaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!

[darsbw]

Public hanging of moon rabbit cookie soon

[darsbw]

On it boss *scurries off into the woods*

[darsbw]

I find the fan fiction names on ao3 for gravity falls intresting.

You’ll find a fic named something like “glass shatters in the wind, and so do I” or something else poetic and it’s just the 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝓲𝓮𝓼𝓽 smut you can imagine, but on the opposite end of the spectrum you can find the most heart-wrenching earth shattering angst fix that changes your life forever, and it’s named “whoops my bones are missing (Stanley pines ate my pen again)”

[darsbw]

fun fact!

the average human body contains enough bones to make a full skeleton!

okay good night!!

[darsbw]

my ouppies

La figurinos. Beautiful.

[darsbw]

Ok so I noticed @aroace-get-out-of-my-face and @babyblankyerror (PLEASE GO CHECK THEM OUT THEYRE SO COOL)making some awesome prompts so I figured I would try my hand at one (based off a dream I had)

So Stanley is captured. Probably by Rico or something, and in a warehouse all tied up. When Rico leaves to go do something or whatever, Stanley somehow summons a nice but a bit wacky wizard (he had some magical item he stole from somebody that Rico didn’t bother to take and him struggling summons the wizard) the wizard, seeing Stan has his item, goes “oh boy! You found my missing item! Ive been looking for that for ages! Since you found it, I’ll give you one wish!” And Stan, weirded out of his mind, wondering why the guy he stole the item from is congratulating him on finding it, and probably thinks he’s dreaming but not about to give up an opportunity to escape, goes;

“GET ME OUTTA HERE!”

Of course, his mouth is tied up and gagged so the wizard has to work with what he’s got.

Though honestly “drake bug hawk bear” is not a good guess.

The wizard goes “alright great! I can do that! :)” and teleports him outside of the warehouse and tells him he has 24 hours till the spell kicks in (to give him time to leave) Stan, not really listening, jumps in his car and heads out, still confused as hell. Of course, 24 hours later the car is a bit too small to keep driving in and also now is wrecked because turning into a crazy hybrid of a dragon, stag beetle, golden eagle, and brown bear may cause some damage to your surroundings.

So he starts walking. Where, you ask?

To gravity falls.

Meanwhile, Stanford is having the time of his life! He’s researching, he’s finding new, interesting creatures, he’s defying the laws of nature, he’s getting chased down by a unicorn after trying to take its blood for “testing purposes”,

Wait actually that last one isn’t vey good.

But luckily for him, Stan has been walking for days and honestly couldn’t be more willing to fight off magical creatures for his brother.

Sibling bonding time!

There its is that’s. That’s the idea. Is cool? Did good job??? I cooked???

[darsbw]

The yearning for pineapple vs the knowledge of how uncomfy it makes my mouth feel